Woe is me. Jim and I missed one of our favorite television shows last week because our recording schedule got knocked out by a storm. The show is Zoo, shown on CBS in the states. The program’s premise is that a chemical company created a mutation that has caused animals to be 1) more intelligent and 2) viciously aggressive toward people. Not said is the fact that it has apparently made people much LESS intelligent. The characters on the show make one foolish, okay. . . stupid decision after another, and the fact that they are still alive would have Darwin rolling in his grave. The show is just flat awful, but so awful that Jim and I have begun to look forward to hooting on the couch when it comes on. The ridiculousness of the show is never ending.
Example: An evil military man has come up with a way to save humanity by killing all the animals on earth. All of them. Every single one, from pandas to planeria, from cockroaches to Koalas. No plan on how to do that is mentioned, but only 5 people in the entire world appear to be concerned about it. Not because it’s impossible, but because it would be cruel to the “animals”. Not mentioned is that, uh, people are animals too and anything that killed a hippo would kill a human. Or that killing all the “animals” would result in the extinction of the human race even if somehow the humans survived. Or that it would be logistically impossible in the first place. But wait, there’s more:
The protagonists in the show are a motley group, who meet up on occasion, while recovering from death-defying adventures with assorted mammals, spiders, and snakes, on an airplane that appeared from nowhere, and seems to never land or run out of gas. My favorite is the veterinary pathologist who is miraculously doing highly technical genetic research in a lab he created from band aids and bubble wrap. There’s nothing wrong with the acting, but the script is so ridiculous that we imagine conversations between actors and agents that along the lines of “I don’t care what the contract says, get me out of the show right now!”
I started thinking about writing a blog on animal shows so bad they’re great last weekend, when the dogs and I came into the house to find Jim howling with laughter at the television. A comedy show? No. Well, sort of. He stumbled onto a movie titled “Sharktopus vs Whalewolf.” And I thought Zoo was funny. Oh my. The animation is so bad I assumed the movie had been made decades ago, but no, it was released by the SyFy channel in 2015. Its redeeming feature is that the producers, director and actors made no bones about what they were making: Another show so bad it’s great, in its own absurd way. You gotta give them credit for not pretending to be anything but a movie so bad it’s worth laughing at.
And so, because I think we all could use a laugh, I ask you, dear readers, if you have suggestions for animal-related shows that are so bad they are great.
MEANWHILE, back on the farm. Dog days of summer indeed, still a lot of hot and humid days that keep our outdoor excursions short, although some better weather last weekend was a nice change. A big sheepdog trial is coming up at the end of August, and Maggie and I haven’t worked together as much as I’d like because of the heat. She works a bit every day, but we really need to get off my little farm (12+acres) and work on bigger fields to get ready for the next trial. The course is massive, up to international standards, and it will be a real challenge for Maggie and I, especially since this is just her third trial of her life, and only my third in two years. If she finds the sheep I’ll be happy, and I’ll be thrilled if we finish the course with any degree of aplomb, no matter what the score.
Here is a great photo of Maggie working, taken by good friend and photographer extraordinaire, Robert Streiffer:
And here’s what happens if your sheepdog is faster than the reaction time of your photographer!
Peter says
Oh good – I get to go first. How about Scooby Doo? It only every has one plot, that of a fake ghost. And “I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for those kids.”
Jen_N says
I’m not sure what it says about me that this is the first time I feel that I have a contribution to make to your blog, but… Black Sheep (2006 film), Sharknado (1-4), Megashark v Crocosaurus, Snakes on a Plane, Evan Almighty, Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1-3), Dr Doolittle (1 & 2)…
I’m starting to realise I have a problem.
Margaret McLaughlin says
Don’t need a TV show; the photo of empty grass was enough to make me snort coffee up my nose.
Thanks. I think.
Alice R. says
My husband was out if town one week, and I was feeling that dissastisfied boredom with everything that can come with a mild funk. TV was no different, but I hooted when I found a movie about a giant shark that commanded all the other sharks in the world by “electrocommunication”. I returned the next night to find another one (so ridiculous I’m amazed I forgot it), and finished up with one about a three headed shark. Hilarious!
My husband is an amateur photographer, and almost fell out of his chair laughing at your “missing Maggie” photo. He so knows what that’s like!
Diane says
yeah – Shaknado, and Sharknado 2 the Second one!!!!! I love a stupid show…so bad it’s good!
And, a tribute to vegetables, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes .
Sue says
Very old movie-Attack of the Killer Shrews
Peri says
Taking your TV watching in a related but different direction, one of the reasons that I LOVE and am addicted to NCIS (the original) is the way dogs are featured in the show. Over and over again, the dogs are well-trained, usually purebred dogs presented in a fashion that values them appropriately.
Jan says
Mine isn’t so much so bad it’s good, as I just don’t watch t.v. unless it’s really good for the most part. but how about so bad, but has some great twist that sucks “some” people into believing it’s good??? Like most ah-hem, not naming names, dog training, I can fix your problems by teaching you to be alpha, shows. Snort . . . . .
However, recently stumbled on a really GOOD show . . . . “lucky dog” . . . great story premise, good training, charismatic lead (the dogs :))
LisaW says
The grass photo made me snort, too. What a great shot.
When I stayed home “sick” from grade-school, this movie was always on TV (coincidence?). It was “You Never Can Tell,” about a German Shepherd, King, who was left millions of dollars in his owner’s will and then was poisoned. King’s spirit thinks he knows who did it and wants the chance to prove it. Enter Rex Shepherd, private eye, who snacks on dog food, and his sweet-talking secretary Goldie, a former race horse, who eats raw oats. There are great shots of them in the sky before they come to earth and the dog and horse jokes are funny (as remembered by my much younger self). I loved, loved that movie, so much so that I don’t want to see it now and ruin my memory of it.
The TV series I really liked was Dogtown, about Best Friends Animal Society in Utah. It’s in the actually really good category.
Gayla says
My husband says we can only get sports on our TV. Not sure if that’s true because I’ve never been allowed to hold the remote control thingy… :>)
Best part of the “missing Maggie” pic: the grass flying in the air after take-off!
Linda Freeman says
C’mon. Who can forget “Willard” and
“Ben”.
Nic1 says
Hahaha! Excellent post – I could just do with a good laugh!
‘Snakes on a Plane’ is most excellent in its excruciating badness and I definitely need to check out ‘Attack of the Killer Shrews’.
Personal favourites include ‘The Grey’ where an alpha wolf is hell bent on killing Liam Neeson and his cronies as some sort of revenge for killing and eating one of his pack.
Those wolves are eeevil!
Another dastardly shark classic worth checking out is, ‘Deep Blue Sea’, where super smart sharks kill the scientists for fun.
Dr Susan McCallister explains:
‘Their brains (sharks) weren’t large enough to harvest sufficient amounts of the protein complex, so we violated the Harvard Compact (!!?) Jim and I used gene therapies to increase their brain mass. A larger brain means more protein. As a side effect the Sharks got smarter.’
Janice Higgins replies;
You stupid b*#%$!
You get the drift…….you just gotta wonder if gene therapy made the Sharks so smart, what on Earth made the scientists in this film so stupid.
?
Rae Hughes says
How dare anyone say Black Sheep was a bad movie!!! It was filmed in my home town in locations that I walked my dogs and rode horses! Actually, I know the two farmers bringing the mob of sheep in the movie and the dogs that are working them in reality. I also know the dog that starred – he is a working sheep dog. They were having a ball. OK the premise is barking mad but is totally in line with traditional NZ film makers (Meet the Freebles, Bad Taste are two examples.) I have to agree with Shark movies but would add the tremors collection as well
Diane says
To Lisa: Really loved the honesty about not wanting to see the movie again as it may ruin the memory. And, I’m going to check out the “Attack of the Killer Shrews”!
Dave M. says
Surprised nobody mentioned “Ghost Shark”, “Sharktopus”, or “Night of the Lepus” (giant rabbits!)
em says
Ok, so I don’t watch much TV in general, but my semi-guilty, at-home-with-a-cold pleasures are British Murder Mysteries. Any and all of them- Miss Marple, Poirot, Inspector Morse, Midsomer Murders, you name it. They vary from quite good to quite silly (seriously, HOW many people have been murdered in this sleepy little village this week?) and I love them all. They aren’t technically animal shows, but several of them feature one of my favorite elements of animal-as-backdrop themes: The midnight cry of the fox.
I know that foxes are quite common in England, and I know from experience that they can be quite noisy, but every.single.scene that features a tree or a lawn and takes place after dark has that exact same fox cry, even multiple times in the same episode. It’s like a shorthand for “Nighttime English Countryside” and I love it.
Robin says
Zombeavers. I am not making this up.
Trisha says
Well, I have my playlist written out for me here! Between Zombie beavers (oh my), Night of the Lepus, Attacks of the Killer Shrews… etc, I think I’ll be entertained throughout the long, dark winter.
To Dave M: Don’t worry! I mentioned Sharktopus in the body of the post. You are not alone!
To em: A woman after my own heart. First, we love English murder mysteries. Second, how is that there is NEVER only one murder? Three seems to be the most common number. Who knew that English country villages were as dangerous as back alleys in Baghdad? Third, I ADORE that you have noticed the same fox cry in so many shows. You are way ahead of me; I’ll be listening from now on!
Kat says
I’ve been reading the blog and comments with interest but today is the first chance I’ve had to add my two cents worth. This turns out to be fortuitous since my favorite fits in nicely with Trisha and Em’s professed love of British murder mysteries. I’m also a fan of that genre but I wanted to recommend Vicar of Dibley a British comedy about a female vicar in a small village made up of seriously eccentric characters. Animals are a frequent theme. One of my favorite episodes is the Blessing of the Animals. The vicar is worried that no one will show up for the service but on the morning of the service everyone is there with every kind of animal. As she’s walking to the church she stops to admire a sweet faced little dog. When she asks the dog’s name the biker dude on the other end of the leash answers “Satan.” She walks on muttering “Brave of him to come really.” It cracks me up every time. But whether it’s the woman knitting with wool directly off the sheep (dirty white yarn stretching between the half sheared sheep and the knitting needles), the budgie that’s come back to life multiple times, or the farmer who has a seriously inappropriate relationship with his sheep the animals are part of the fabric of village life and always funny. It’s really a brilliant show. The writers genuinely love the absurd characters and treat them seriously despite the fact that the characters are all caricatures that are completely over the top. It’s one of my favorite shows.
Jen_N says
@Rae Hughes: Don’t get me wrong – I LOVED Black Sheep. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard at a movie. It’s hilarious! However, between the genetically modified killer sheep, were-sheep and sheep who can drive vans, both the underlying premise and the plot are bizarre. Having said that, it doesn’t try to be anything else and so it works beautifully. I’d definitely class it as so bad it’s good.
@Kat: Love the Vicar of Dibley. Dawn French is particularly amazing in that.
Rae Hughes says
@Jen_N. Oh I agree it is barking mad – but that is essential for that type of Kiwi film ?. It was quite well acted given that premise. And, as for this blog, the dogs are very well trained.
Christina Hargrove says
Three dog-themed movies I watched lately: Eight Below, Sled Dogs, and an indie movie called Lucky Dog that is one of the wackiest movies I’ve seen (seems to have been filmed in Taiwan). The first two are maybe just not very good, but Lucky Dog is definitely so bad it’s good 🙂
Audrey Pearn says
Love the flying grass picture. Also love the beautiful sheep dog!
muttzrule says
I know I’m really, REALLY late to this party, but being fairly new to this blog I’m catching up on lots of good stuff that I’m sorry to have missed out on earlier. Just the titles and synopses of some shows mentioned are funny enough. Glad to see Night of the Lepus got some votes. Usually some twisted cable tv programmer would run it near Easter. Great fun watching 50 ft. tall bunnies, exposed to radioactive waste, stomping on cars and such.
I loved Dogtown too, made me wish I could move there and get a job with Best Friends. I also liked Meerkat Manor on Animal Planet. Romance, adventure, rival gangs battling for their turf…now that was must see tv ☺