Amazing Maisie
I had a post all planned out (in my head, hadn’t written anything), but Jim’s mother died early Tuesday morning. It is sad and hard and a huge relief, because the last year and a half of end-stage Parksinon’s has been rough on her.
She made it to 95, although she wanted to make it to 100. On her 95th birthday last week, during the few moments she was cogent, she began telling people she was one hundred years old. We corrected her once, then thought “To what purpose?” So we all celebrated her 100th birthday–Congratulations, Maisie, well done.
We are where most of you all have been at one point or another: Regular life on hold, lots to do, telling her stories, hugging each other, relatives flying in . . .
So, just photographs today. It’s snowing hard again, it finally looks like January in Wisconsin. About time. I’ll get some more photos later when I can.
Here are Willie and Maggie playing fetch with their Kong Safestix in the snow last week: (Note that I cut the round ends off because Maggie does it herself as if she had a butcher knife in her mouth, and they are the perfect size to stick in a dog’s throat and choke them. In Kong’s defense, it’s not a tug toy, it is for fetching, but it works great for tug games if you cut off the ends. W and M like it better than anything else I’ve tried and it lasts forever.)
Willie would prefer to have the toy all to himself.
Midway through the eclipse of the moon. I was too tired to stay up any later for the entire thing. But it was pretty cool, and somehow an eclipse of the moon seems fitting this week . . .
Here’s to you and yours, and to valiant old women who fight like warriors to raise five kids on their own, to manage on a tiny budget and to battle Parkinson’s to the bitter end.
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About the Author
Patricia B. McConnell, PhD, CAAB Emeritus is an applied animal behaviorist who has been working with, studying, and writing about dogs for over twenty-five years. She encourages your participation, believing that your voice adds greatly to its value. She enjoys reading every comment, and adds her own responses when she can.
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I’m sorry. I walked that road with my father, and I still miss him. The stress and pain will dissipate leaving the good memories behind. Be good to yourselves, rest plenty, and eat well to recover.
Love the Maggie and Willie pics – they are such a balm, aren’t they?
Congratulations on getting to your goal, Maisie! May you have an eternity of joy in heaven.
My condolences to you and Jim. Having just gotten my own mother, who is just shy of her 96th birthday out of the hospital, it is just darn hard. Be with family and friends, remember and laugh about the good times and be grateful for each day we are upright on this earth.
96, holy moly. My warmest wishes for smooth sailing…
“… valiant old women who fight like warriors…” What a wonderful tribute…
My heart is with you and Jim. I made the same bittersweet journey with my Dad; sad and hard and a huge relief is exactly right. He died at 89, but was rounding up and told everyone he was 90. I, too, started to correct him, and then thought better of it. When it’s my turn, I’ll round up (or down) as I wish, thank you, and nobody better edit my math. Thinking of you both with prayers and a full heart.
Can we start making our ages up now? Jack Benny did. (And if you know who Jack Benny is then you are ready to start making up your own age for sure…)
So sorry for your loss. What a life! 95! The pictures of the dogs are just beautiful, love the snow in the face.
I was lucky enough to have my father until he was 95 and 1/2…..and he always made sure we included the “1/2.” Godspeed, Maisie.
I’ve always said that months/years early in life and later in life are much more meaningful that in the middle years. What’s the diff between 42 and 43? Not much, but it’s a lot when you’re 5 years old, or 94.
“telling her stories” — perfect! Lost my 90-year-old mom to Alzheimer’s a few months ago. As with your mother-in-law, her last year, especially last six months, were brutal. Telling her stories has really helped our family. She sounds like an wonderfully strong woman! My condolences to you, your husband, and all who loved Maisie.
So sorry Cathy, I hope you are healing yourself. Such a challenge to get through this, so glad her suffering (and yours) is over.
I love telling my mom’s stories especially the ones about her and the many dogs she loved throughout her life time including my dogs. Before she left this earth she said she would like for me to make a donation in her name with some money she left behind. So we sent a nice donation off to the York, Mane Wildlife Center. She would have approved. I am so proud to say she was a true animal lover.
Love your donation Adrienne! A good reminder to us all to let our loved ones know what we would like…
“It is sad and hard and a huge relief,”
My thoughts are with you. There will be a time to share these words with others I know who are walking the same road.
Thank you.
I am so sorry for your loss. Nothing prepares you and we all must deal with a profound loss in our own way. Be kind to yourself, and take it a day at a time or an hour at a time. May memories of this amazing woman sustain you.
I’m very sorry for your loss and hope all the good memories of what sounds like quite an amazing human provide some measure of comfort to all who knew and loved her.
So sorry for your loss. Been there. 💔 Pictures of the dogs in the snow very therapeutic!
May Choirs of Angels and Barks of Puppies welcome her !!!
Eternal Rest . . .
So very sorry for your loss. What a blessing to share a life with this woman.
Your dogs are magnificent, showing us what loving life is all about!
Lost my Mom at 74 0 way too young and then my Dad at 93 – he was clear of mind, but his body gave out – don’t know which is harder – he had so much he wanted to do but just could not. Still miss them both and it has been many years. As long as we have memory they are still with us.
Blessings to both of you.
I’m truly sorry, and sending good wishes to you and your family. My grandmother passed last year from Alzheimer’s, and I well understand “sad and hard and a relief.” <3
Argh, Kristen, so sorry. Not an easy journey for anyone.
I feel for you in your sorrow. Thank you for sharing so much with us over so many years.
So sad and hard, although the release can also be a blessing. Thank goodness for our dogs. Thank you for managing to post and share your news. Hope the dogs are helping everyone’s equilibrium/mood/spirits at this sad time.
So sorry for your loss. My Maisie is the canine equivalent of your Maisie. Mine is a westie who will be 16 in April. Sound of body but has dementia. She is happy but life can be a roller coaster at times. She is a great dog with many stories of her own. Love the name Maisie!
Sloppy kisses to your Maisie! I’d love to say our Maisie loved dogs, but she didn’t. She actually disliked them. Led to no small number of amusing conversations like “How wonderful that you can take Tootsie, a certified AAI dog, to visit your mother-in-law!”
“Well, actually, Maisie doesn’t really like dogs.”
“Oh.”
We send our deepest sympathies. Jim’s mom sounds just grand. “A valiant old woman…” – lots and lots of lessons there. “It is sad and hard and a huge relief” – yes. And somehow the sun keeps rising. Big hugs for both of you and all who loved Maisie.
Dear Patricia — These recent posts of yours dealing with aging, death and the love and aspirations in between, surprise me by being among the most meaningful. Its hardto imagine they could resonate more deeply than your writing on dogs, behavior and training, which I treasure. But somehow, as I am letting out the silver in my hair and watching the body fall apart (with some amazement and fear) I am in need of that community as well. Perhaps this is where your new writing will lead you. It will be welcome.
I like Maisie’s smile. Blessings to all of her loved ones.
Laurene: I am grateful that my excursions beyond dog behavior and training are resonating. Dogs will always be a focal point for me, as will all interesting animal behavior, but how good it is to hear that my comments about silver hair and changing perspectives are well received. All I know is that I need to be authentic, and I just can’t write like an upcoming new trainer. . . I was talking to someone about social media not long ago, and she said “Just let people go on your journey with you”. Wise words I think. Here’s to all of our journeys, where ever they may lead us. (Could we skip the “body fall apart” stuff though?)
thank you for sharing a little of her story with us…. we send our deepest condolences to your family.
My condolences to you and Jim on the loss of Maisie. I recently lost a friend and long-time co-worker to Parkinson’s…she was only 79. Maisie is/was amazing. Also love the pic of Will and looking into his eyes. I’m halfway thru reading “the Education of Will” and loving every minute of it. Your writing makes me feel as though I’m walking beside you as I read. Thank you.
Thank you so much Joan for your words about Maisie and The Education of Will. Makes me happy to hear that reading the books feels like walking together down a path in the woods!
My sincere sympathy to you and Jim.
Dear Trisha – in all aspects of your life that you are kind enough to share with us, you provide inspiration, comfort and joy: sending sincere condolences to you and Jim for your loss. And thank you for sharing your comforting pics of Maggie and Willie simply being dogs. ..
I LOVE that you celebrated Maisie’s “100th” birthday…that is really lovely.
Amazing that she made it to 95, wow!
My condolences to you both.
My sincere sympathy for the loss of Maisie. She looks like the salt of the earth. It’s hard to go through as one left behind, but she is now able to rest. I think of the things she and others like her saw through their years. From getting electricity to google glasses. Mind blowing.
My mom, who just turned 95, and is still sharp in mind and tongue, tells people she’s a year older than she really is. I asked her why, and she explained that in case she did something silly or forgot something, they’d chalk it up to her age! She didn’t want to appear pixilated. I didn’t explain that they’d probably do that whether she was 93 or 94 or 95. I’m trying to learn to just go with it (not easy for me).
A near-centenarian explained to me as he was on his death journey that as we age, we simply become more of who we truly are. I have taken his words to heart.
I’m not quite ready to start Jack Bennying my age, but close 😉
My deepest condolences to you and your family on the loss of your mother in law. My father has Parkinson’s and we are doing our best to motivate him to fight and enjoy his life, however long it is.
I am sorry for your loss. My mom, who will be 92 in July, is already telling people she’s 100…..
My sympathies to you and Jim.
I’m curious, if Maisie didn’t like dogs does that mean that Jim grew up without them? I’m always so interested by people who had no experience with dogs growing up and then were introduced to them later in life to find out they truly loved dogs. Do they regret those years without them or do they have more fun learning all about them? To go from a mother who didn’t like dogs to a partner whose life revolves around them is pretty amazing. At least no one could accuse of him marrying his mother! 🙂
Jim didn’t grow up with dogs (he grew up mostly on Air Force bases in France and Germany. He had two dogs during his previous marriage, but it wasn’t until we started dating that he began to see how rich a relationship one could have with a dog. He is now firmly in the camp of a dedicated dog-lover, and if Willie had to choose, I think he’d choose Jim over me.