Having a dog with Separation Anxiety is no fun for the owner, and no doubt less fun for the dog. Mild cases include dogs who pace or whine for a bit after their owner leaves, while dogs with serious cases can injure themselves and/or destroy your house. I write about how to prevent and treat Separation Anxiety (SA) in the booklet, I’ll Be Home Soon, which I wrote after seeing how much suffering it can cause.
In the booklet I mention “quiet but loving comings and goings,” repeating the oft-given advice to avoid emotionally overloading dogs when you leave the house and when you return. The belief has been that dramatic departures or returns might be a factor is causing dogs to be anxious when left alone. I repeated that advice in a recent blog post about preventing SA, related to all the new dogs adopted during the pandemic. But is it really helpful?
You gotta love science for reminding us what we know, and what we don’t. Researchers in Texas tested whether high-arousal transitions create SA-like behaviors, or correlate with owners who have dogs with SA. The answer, in these studies anyway, is a resounding “possibly not.” Like all studies, these experiments had constraints, but they are still a valuable effort toward treating the problem of SA.
The two studies were done by Teixeria and Hall at Texas Tech University, and are published in the Journal of Veterinary Behavior, with the title “Effect of greeting and departure interactions on the development of increased separation-related behaviors in newly adopted adult dogs.” (Note: I’ve linked to it above but it’s not open access. You have to buy it to read it unless you are part of an academic institution. I’ll summarize it here for you so you don’t have to, if you’d rather not spend $31.50 dollars on one paper. [Sigh.])
One study looked at correlations between the frequency of SA and high-arousal versus low-arousal departures and arrivals. 1,990 owners responded to a 100-question survey designed to gauge their dog’s SA, or lack of it, and the owner’s behavior during transitions in and out of the house. 323 dogs had been diagnosed with SA by vets or vet behaviorists, 655 others had symptoms of SA according to their owners, and the other dogs had no behaviors that suggested SA. Importantly, owners with dogs with SA were asked how they initially behaved when coming and going when they first got the dog, and how they behaved after the dog developed or was diagnosed with SA. Because calm departures are often a standard part of treatment paradigms, this was an important distinction.
If the advice about moderating transitions is useful, one would expect that owners who were quiet and calm when coming and going would have fewer dogs with SA symptoms. That was not the case: Comparisons between the “initial” behavior of owners with SA and non-SA dogs showed no difference in behavior, suggesting that high arousal transitions did not create SA in the dogs. Higher “current leaving” arousal intensities (what the owner does now versus what they did when they first got the dog), was actually associated with lower separation-related behavior scores.
In another study, twelve dogs in a “train to adopt” program at a local shelter were divided into two groups, “high arousal” and “low arousal,” related to the behavior of humans when they left the room. All dogs were fitted with heart monitors, activity monitors and video taped. After a ten-minute period of adjustment in the room fitted with the camera, a person entered and spent ten minutes with the dog. The person (the same for each of ten trials for each dog) interacted with the dog for ten minutes, either with lots of excited talking, play and petting, or a brief greeting with a calm voice, and then a lack of interaction with the dog. In both conditions, the person then gathered up keys from a shelf, said goodbye and left the room. The dog was then monitored for vocalizations, activity levels, proximity to the door, and any other SA-related behavior.
Not surprisingly, heart rate and activity levels were much higher during the direct interactions in the “high arousal” condition than in the other. But that was not true after the person left. There was no difference in any of the factors studied between groups during the time the dogs were left alone. (Although activity levels dropped from the first session to the later sessions within the groups.)
So, what do we know from these studies? Do we know for sure that our behavior, as we’re leaving and returning, has no effect on a dog’s SA-related behavior? No, no and nopers. Each study had it’s constraints–one was correlational, and we all know that causation and correlation are often not related. And a study on a small number of shelter dogs doesn’t replicate the experience of dogs who have been living in a house for a substantial period of time.
A review of the literature shows that findings about causes of SA are all over the map. There have been correlations between SA and all kinds of factors–from having one human in the house (Flannigan & Dodman 2001), to having several females in the house, (McGreevy & Masters 2008), to being sexually intact (the dog that is), to being hyper attached (but dismissed as a factor by Parthasarathy et al. 2006). If this makes you a little dizzy, join the club, but that’s how science often works, when you are dealing with a gazillion factors and the messiness of real life outside of a laboratory.
So, what do we do with this information, incomplete as it is? First, we encourage more good research, because it’s clearly needed. Getting funding for complicated behavioral research is hard–really, really hard, and we need to let our legislators know we are in favor of funding for more research on canine behavior. Second, do we continue to suggest that people keep transitions in and out of the house low key? That’s an interesting question, given how much we know we don’t know. My choice would be to explain what we know to our clients or friends, and then let them decide. Certainly there’s no harm in being calm when coming and going, but people should know there is no data at present to support being especially so. I would suggest that this study is at least fuel for arguing against, as I always have, the more draconian versions of the advice, like “ignore your dog completely for a half hour before you leave.”
What we do know is that, at present, desensitization and some forms of classical conditioning are the best way we know of to treat SA (Butler, Sargisson, & Elliffe, 2011). I’ve had a great deal of success working with clients whose dogs have suffered from SA by using those methods, although there have been a few cases of severe SA that could only be managed and never “cured.” This is not the place to go through an entire treatment plan, but it’s summarized in the booklet, I’ll Be Home Soon. But take the suggestions in it about comings and goings with a grain of salt, from an author happy to find her advice possibly out-dated. That’s how science works, and we are all the better for it.
This brings up my question to you: What do you do when you leave the house? I don’t make a fuss when leaving, but if we’re both going to be gone we put the dogs into their crates with a tiny Greenie (which probably has no effect on their teeth but they adore). When we come home one of us lets the dogs out and gives them a loving greeting while stroking them, but we don’t go crazy about it, as if we’d cheated death on the way home. What about you? What do you do? If you have dog with SA have you modified how you talk to your dogs on the way out and the way in because of it? I’ll love hearing about what you do, or don’t do, from so many different perspectives.
MEANWHILE, back on the farm: It is definitely spring! It’s just busy out there, with many species of birds returning. One of my favorites are the Sandhill Cranes, a pair of whom we found feeding in a field not farm from the farm.
Another sign of spring are all the controlled burns in areas managed as natural prairies. Burning in spring subdues invasive plants and encourages native plants, especially grasses, to thrive. This isn’t a great photograph because the air was full of smoke. Not much I could do about that.
Of course, the snow on the flowers below are yet another clear sign of spring here in Wisconsin. Hey, it’s March, it happens. As long as we don’t get a brutal drop in temperature, these early bulbs are just fine. The snow melted in a few days and the flowers are thriving.
Speaking of flowers, anyone know what this bulb is? I planted some mixed bulbs behind the house, and don’t know who these cuties are. They are small, about the size of a dime, but they sure make me happy.
I’m not sure how happy Nellie was in the photo of her and her daughter Polly in their heated kitty house. Maybe she’s asking her why Polly’s eye turned green? Captions welcome!
Frances says
Very interesting. I have always found the advice to completely ignore my dogs on leaving and returning impossible to follow, except for very brief trips of just a few minutes. If I am going without them I let them know in advance (“Dogs are going to stay and be good”) so they don’t get excited at the prospect of an outing, and leave them with a calm repetition of “Stay and be good”. But when I get back after an hour or two away I happily accept the joyous greeting and sit on the stairs so that they can reach my face and nuzzle into me. Then I take them for a quick run outside and everyone settles down. But I rarely leave the dogs, especially these days…
Margaret says
Nina’s SA was so severe that I took her to Purdue for treatment. I had tried to follow the standard advice, and, frankly, felt that it made little difference. What was critical for Nina was the timing of my absence, and to a lesser extent, its duration. She was always able to handle my work schedule, and there was never much possibility of a low-key entry in any case, since the necessary sequence was home-out-to-pee-breakfast.
It was the random absences that triggered her, and especially if I were gone longer than an hour.
I could just about fit in a quick trip to the library, but evening meetings were impossible.
Every absence followed the pattern of outside, then into the crate with a cookie. Earlier on I had made extensive use of stuffed Kongs and kibble-dispensing toys, but when her anxiety worsened they came close to being a Pavlov-in-reverse. She had learned that food toys meant I was leaving.
I had started the Relaxation Protocol with her before we went to Purdue, and I saw some improvement. The Prozac made a huge difference, but what really turned the corner was getting Nina her own dog. Elly and Lia died within 4 months of each other in 2014, and Nina had been an only child, except when I had guide dog puppies. Some dogs can’t handle that, and Nina was one of them. I am ashamed at how long it took me to realize that I wasn’t enough for her-at least when I wasn’t there.
I was able to wean her off the medication, and now I am retired, so the three of us hang out together24/7. She is a happy dog.
I think your flowers are celandines.
Maia says
My dog used to have mild SA, that luckily (if oddly) disappeared when he was required to be on strict crate rest for 10 weeks. I’ve been thinking about it again because I got a new puppy recently.
My puppy is doing exceptionally well with crate training and separation, and I credit part of that to my adult dog’s consistent routine with me. I prepare his kong, which he gets excited about, then he gets one last potty trip (which builds anticipation for the kong). When we get back in the house he races into my bedroom, spinning and bouncing, until I put the kong down. I release him to it as I shut the door and then exit the house. With my puppy, she got caught up in the excitement before she even knew what was happening, and now just as enthusiastically runs to crate herself in order to get her kong. It’s not a particularly calm leaving, but I feel like my dogs getting excited and having good feelings during the actual moment of departure, then calming themselves through chewing/licking the kong, helps them then relax and sleep stress-free while I’m gone.
When I come home, I don’t do anything special—I fuss over my adult dog a bit (since he isn’t crated and runs to greet me) and he usually grabs a toy to squeak and race around with while I put away things.
Astrid says
The yellow flowers are called Eranthis Cilicia (Winter Aconites).
And since I’m already writing: I don’t make a fuss when I’m leaving or coming home, but that’s mainly because I don’t like my dogs to be hyped up. In my experience, hyped up dogs are a recipe for chaos and disaster.
So I tell her “I’m going to do this and that and I’ll be home soon, I love you, see you soon” as I put on my shoes and jacked and take my purse and keys, while my dog is laying on her mat in the hallway, watching me. Of course she’s not exactly thrilled when I’m leaving her behind, but she’s not shown any signs of seperation anxiety in all of her live. I also don’t crate her when I’m gone, she can pretty much use the whole indoor space except from the bedroom and the bathrooms, since those doors are closed.
Wendy K. says
I’ve had a couple of dogs start to express some agitation when they saw me preparing to leave. I know that food toys don’t help dogs with true anxiety, but a ritual of presenting peanut butter-smeared Kongs or hollow bones certainly took the sting out for my guys. Instead of agitation, I now see happy anticipation as I prepare to leave. My current dog Juni goes right to her “place” and waits there for her treat. Arriving home, we greet with perhaps a little petting, and I escort them to the back door.
I think the flower is Winter Aconite? Now I want some! All the early bulbs are in full swing here in Kentucky.
Gayle says
Hi! Your bulb is Eranthis Hyemalis – Winter Aconite. I love it too!!! One of the first bulbs to pop up – so cheery!!
I’m a don’t make a fuss coming or going person. My first dog was not a greeter when I would come home – he’d stay on the bed and kind of lean over to look out the bedroom door to see if I was heading to the kitchen which might make him get off the bed in hopes that if I was getting something to eat maybe there would be something for him too!!
Christine says
Great post! I always enjoy and appreciate your insights! I always wonder about how important calm departure and arrivals matter. Not leaving making a big deal about it seems like it makes a lot of sense to me as we know they pick up on our emotions, but ignoring them when we get home seems a bit cruel to me.
I have a foster dog who in the beginning seemed pretty anxious when I was gone. She would bark and whine when I left and after about 15 minutes she would settle down. Intermittently she would get up and wander around and bark. Now I just tell her I’m going to be gone for a while and I’ll be back and give her a little bit of food and she seems to settle down without issue. (I have cameras 😉) She does seem to understand the cue as often she just goes and lays down even before I leave. I know she’s not happy about me leaving, but is resigned to it. I don’t know if the cue helps any anxiety or not or she’s just more relaxed in my home and trusts that I’ll be back. When I come home she is super excited and dancing and occasionally even jumps on me. It is extremely adorable! And I can’t help but laugh and interact.
How is it that you have flowers already?? I’m in VT and the daffodils and just popping out of the soil.
Mary O says
I have owned 2 dogs with separation anxiety and there is no doubt that their anxiety level was why they were given up. I quickly found that petting always helped these dogs along with a strict routine when coming and going and medication. My husband was always accusing me that my petting was making things worse so I was thrilled when the article by Chiara Miriti in Journal of Veterinary Behavior showed that petting actually decreased cortisol levels in the dog. People get so worried that petting is rewarding the anxiety, that they forget that it can soothe and calm an animal.
Robin says
Those little beauties are winter aconites, Eranthis sp.
And as confounding as it may be to being able to advise pet owners managing s.e., I for one am happy to see updated information on the latest research into behavioral management strategies. It helps reaffirm that we are using science and not simply getting stuck on an idea that seems right to us, which is true for so many trainers using out of date methods and tools. Thanks for sharing!
Diane Gregory says
Are your yellow flowers aconites? Not sure how big a dime is, but here in the UK, ours are about an inch across.
MaryLou says
Our pup definitely has SA but especially for my husband. Even when he just goes in the garage. She cries and paces then lays in front of the door and cries more. We bought a new dog bed for the kitchen – we always exit through the kitchen into the garage- and when we leave we give her a frozen Kong, put her on her bed and tell her “wait”
She goes crazy when we come home. We pet her pretty calmly and take her out to do her business. It’s become our pattern Not sure it works but it helps US when we leave her to have a routine. She is a sweet 5 yr old Golden and has our hearts!
Nina says
The little yellow flowers are winter aconite! I planted some many years ago because they are very first thing to flower, which is so welcome after our long New England winters.
We’ve had two dogs, both adult rescues, and with both I established the exact same protocol for when they’re left alone, which is simply that they get an extra-good treat, like a safe chewy (Greenie, dried sweet potato) or even a filled Kong (generally when we go out for our long bike rides and I feel super guilty about going to do something fun, active, and outdoorsy without the dog…). I’ve always stuck with the calm demeanor, but I always say “we’ll be right back”—probably because it makes me feel better. 🙂
Truthfully, I don’t think either of our dogs would have been prone to separation anxiety. Both dogs were/are super super food motivated, so good treats trump everything. Our first dog was a real homebody—we used to joke that she loved home more than us. Our current dog is pretty independent but also just likes to always know exactly what’s going on—so having a protocol for us leaving is important. If one of us manages to “sneak” out of the house without her knowing, she gets very mopey (but definitely not anxious).
Marcia McGinnnis says
Our dogs (2 PBGVs) don’t show signs of SA. Our routine when they were under 2 yrs is that they go into a crate when we are gone, and even now when we go to bed. Whenever they go into their crates they get a small treat, and it is never used as punishment. Now they are mature enough to stay loose when we leave. We still give them a treat when we leave, and have no challenges by them trying to go out the door with us. We are calm, and they know we will be back. We hire a pet sitter for occasions when we will be out of town. When we return, or when we get them out of their crates in the morning, they race to the backdoor to be let outside—all pretty much a routine.
Susan Wroble says
The bulb is Winter Aconite, although not sure of any specific variety. Fascinating findings—or more specifically, the lack thereof!— on separation anxiety. Not what I would have expected.
MinnesotaMary says
Lovely pictures! And the topic of separation anxiety is fascinating to me. I have fostered 60+ dogs, mostly huskies but also a few pit bulls and Rottweilers. Never had a case of SA for some reason. Possibly because there’s calm energy in my house (I live alone). Possibly because there are multiple dogs in my house. Possibly because we walk at least 30 minutes (during pandemic it’s been 90 minutes) early in the morning before I leave the house. Maybe huskies are less prone to SA. I always play classical music for the dogs while I’m away. Maybe it’s a combination of all of these and more factors that I can’t think of. At any rate, I do think I’m blessed – I’ve had lots of health and behavior issues with which to deal in my foster dogs, but SA hasn’t been one of them.
Carole says
I have specific treats that all 3 know mean: “I’m leaving and you’re not.” My 2 ‘foster failures’ (Jax & Dusty) used to be crated, but are now loose behind a gate. My wonderful Rottie/Saint mix (Brody) guards the front rooms of the house. To him I always say: “Be a good boy. I’ll be right back.” He then goes to his bed with a sigh. He always greets me with a madly wagging tail and the offer of his current raggedy stuffed toy when I come home. The only dog who shows SA is my son’s year old Pit/Cattle Dog mix (Axl) who spends weekends with us. He follows me everywhere when I’m home, and cries when he can’t see me. Axl is crated – with a bone and some treats – when I leave the house. According to my roommate, he cries the entire time I am gone. He is slowly getting better and is not this clingy at home with my son. I keep my leaving and returning as low key as possible.
Diane P says
Here’s a thought…maybe it’s not the person’s arousal level that triggers anxiety, but the anxiety is already there and is activated or increased, when the dog sees signs you are leaving. My husband makes no fuss over Mindy when he leaves, but Mindy gets anxious when he sees him put on his belt. A sure sign he’s leaving. If instead, he wore a belt all day, and made a fuss over her when he left, maybe we’d assume it was the fuss making her anxious.
Another observation in our house. When we both leave together, Mindy is always in her crate. She almost never fusses. If one of us leaves and the other stays, she goes nuts. We now put her in the crate no matter who’s leaving and she is much calmer. The person staying home let’s her out about two minutes later. It’s not fussing that winds her up, it’s being separated from someone in the family. I think she does better in the crate because it’s a safe place and helps “hold” her anxiety during the actual act one or both of us separating from her.
Maybe for some dogs, fussing over them doesn’t increase anxiety exactly but just prolongs the display of it??
Tucker Margaret says
One of my dogs developed thunder phobia as she aged, which worsened when she was crated during an unexpected storm when I was not home. Since then she has bent the wires of any crate when I am not home. She is fine in a crate anywhere else. Now I leave the crate door open, and she is fine. My other dog is crated, mostly because he is a champion counter surfer (I need help there) bu also because she bullies him. Note: she weighs 45 lbs, he weighs 70.
Now I need to get some Winter Aconite! I think it would go well with my Siberian Squill.
Barbara says
I have a 12 year old Eskie who seems to thrive on routine. When I get ready to leave the house, I say and do the same thing each time. Grabbing my purse is the first cue that I’ll be gone for a while. Rocky watches quietly and follows me to the door. Then I turn to him and always say, “I gotta go but I’ll be back. I’ll see you later.” I say this calmly and quietly with a lower tone on the last sentence. Then I give him a little wave and walk out the door. No fuss or hesitation. Occasionally I would listen at the door but never heard a peep out of him. When I come home, he’ll be sitting quietly by the door. I think establishing a good-bye routine has really helped keep Rocky calm while we are gone.
Paula says
My 2 Terriers know by what I’m wearing if they will be joining me when I leave the house….if in leggings or sweats, they dance around the door excited for a ride; if I’m wearing my scrubs to go to work, they each go to their respective kennel and wait for a small treat. I always say before leaving, “be good, mama loves you”. When I get home at night my husband opens the door and they make a mad dash to see me…the Westie reaches up on his hind feet to give me a kiss before running off with his brother.
Shivani says
I’ve been working on SA with my 15 month old rescue (using your book mostly). I’m glad to read your post, because I have felt guilty that I can’t follow the advice on comings/goings. When leaving, I do it keep it low key and calm. I make sure not to sneak out, because that can make him frantic looking for me. He does much better if he knows exactly what’s happening. But when coming home I don’t ignore him. He just about melts when I come home, and I sit and interact with him (not excitedly) while he calms down. It seems to help him to nuzzle and be touched.
Heidi Rosin says
I just say Momma loves see you tonight and out the door for work. If leaving again for an errand or meeting it’s Momma loves be back soon. I have no idea how they act but they have each other and no signs of stress when I get home unless you count joyful greetings! In the other hand Jeff and I have semi-opposite schedules and they are only alone about 5 hours over a 24 hour period. I leave about 630am and home 6pm while Jeff leaves about 2pm and home 1130pm and more often than not I come home from 1215 to 115 for lunch LOL. They probably wish we were gone more!
ReA says
I noticed that if I exercised my rough collie a bit before leaving her alone, ie. took her for a proper walk or training instead of just a short potty break in the nearby park she was more likely to cause havoc in the home while left alone. She never destroyed anything important but if there was trash available, she browsed it. Once a bag of soil for my houseplant was evenly spread on the floors of my then one-room apartment. My plants were shred on top of it so didn’t need that bag after all… There was the same effect if I left her something to do like a milk carton with treats in it.
So she got only a short walk for doing her business before I left. There I calmly said something like: “Bye! Be nice!”
I think that if she was exercised beforehand she was so aroused that she wanted to continue doing things and that led into a mess. If she was just pottied she stayed in the ‘go back to bed’ mentality. To really tire her before leaving her alone I should have made a really long walk (over 10 km) and/or wait at least half an hour before leaving. Do I have to tell I hate waking up in the morning? So, boring mornings, exercise afternoons in this household.
This dog had no separation anxiety. I did notice though that she wanted to feel safe in the home to be calm alone. After each move in her life she was restless and barked the first times alone (if it happened within a week after moving in and it happened because I need to go shopping food if nothing else) but once she realised this is our new place (or a place we stay temporarily but I always come back) and perfectly safe she was quiet. But locking her into the bedroom was enough to shake her grounds. Poor thing thought I had forgotten her there by accident and rectifying that wrong was loudly demanded and help cried for.
When I come home I sometimes barely talk to the dog and other times I avoid encouraging tones. I say hello, dog, take my groceries or whatever I carry to the kitchen or wherever it belongs to and then pet the dog. I want a calm encounter because one day I might come home with something fragile and don’t want the dog make a fuss or jump at me.
Adam says
Ah separation anxiety. Interesting topic and one that always conjures up pangs of guilt for me.
I own a two year old Shetland Sheepdog. He’s a reactive/barky guy in general (he is a Sheltie after all), but he’s always seemed to handle my work schedule pretty well. And yet I still can’t seem to shake profound feelings of guilt about leaving him penned in my kitchen for an 8 hour work day.
Working at home during the pandemic I notice that he generally sleeps the afternoon away. Evenings are always dedicated to him with off leash time at the local parks and training sessions. He is very much at the center of our lives
Still, I feel that guilt. Many people online talk about taking their dogs to doggy day care. My dog is a sensitive little guy who is gets skittish around strange people. I’ve flirted with the idea of adding a second small dog to the family, but I really have to wonder whether or not this would make his time at home easier.
These sweet little souls are with us for such a short time. I consider it an awesome responsibility to ensure that any dog I own gets the very best care possible. Talk about a meandering post…
Jann Becker says
Both of our dogs have always lived with other dogs, and as far as we can tell when we leave them both they sleep, after watching the driveway to see the car go down the hill. But in the rare event we take the younger one out without his sister we DO come home to overturned trash, stripped counters, etc. It’s unclear if this is a sign of anxiety or a crime of opportunity as she only does so when there are no eyewitnesses; I should add that she loves car rides and hates missing out while little bro despises them.
Do any of the other multi dog households have different results when different combinations are left home?
Eva says
I had an older foster dog (12yrs), not house-trained, terrified of crates, severe separation anxiety (even just being in another room), lots of skin issues from neglect, deaf and partially blind. It took almost a year, but he went to his forever home house trained (going outside or puppy pads), very little anxiety when you leave (no more whining, panting, scratching – just going to sleep after a few minutes), healthy skin and even tolerating a large crate for sleeping at night.
The key for him was routine. Knowing that we were always coming back, knowing we go for walks at regular intervals, knowing there was food at the same time each day and as much water as he wanted. We tried less excitement or ignoring him before we left and after we came home, but that did not make a lot of progress. We also tried tiring him out with longer walks before leaving or giving him kong’s and chew treats. He would still pant himself into exhaustion if we left the room (to go to bed for example).
Routine helped him (and out own dogs and other fosters) over time, but there is likely no one size fits all.
Diane Klonowski says
We have always said, “going to the store”. One trainer told us it was too long a cue but it works for us. When said, they immediately go to their crates and wait for a cookie. Upon return, they have to sit quietly before the crate door is opened and then they want to go out. Has worked with many dogs over the years.
Gayla says
I’m surprised by the study that dismissed any correlation between SA and dogs that are hyper attached to their owner(s).
The shelter dog experiment was such a small sampling and the dogs had no bond with the human. It doesn’t seem like an apples to apples example.
Maybe the biggest factor is simply the dog’s innate personality and how quickly it is able to resign itself to a situation that it doesn’t like, but is out of it’s control?
Lisa says
It feels like the pandemic has induced a new strain of separation anxiety. Our 14-month old puppy, a Cardigan Welsh Corgi, has hardly been left alone because everyone is working from home and there has hardly been anywhere to go. We knew how important it was to leave her for short periods of time at the beginning but it was hard to get everyone out at the same time and there was literally nowhere to go so we got tired of it. She is a good girl who goes in her crate willingly every night and sleeps like a baby but is not used to being crated during the day and I don’t trust her yet to be ok in the house. On our first “outing” recently we gave her a stuffed bone in her crate and left without a problem but came home to find the crate had been “moved” across the floor and she had peed. I think I have to start from square one of your book (which I have!). Have you been encountering this now with Covid?
Lorie says
So, funny thing: my 11-year-old dude suffers from separation anxiety ONLY if we crate him when we leave. If he is free to move around the house he is just fine.
Our 1.5 year old pandemic pup MUST be crated when we leave; her separation anxiety has led her to go looking for harmful things to eat even when we are only gone for a moment. Once she’s in the crate she just curls up and goes to sleep though.
For some reason, for the older dog’s entire life my husband has let him know where we’re going and how long we’ll be gone as we’re heading out. (Okay, we’re going to the movies, we’ll be gone for just a couple of hours, be good and watch the house for us.) So he does it for the little pipsqueak now too. She gets stressed when we start putting our shoes on so we’ve been thinking we need to wear them around the house sometimes without leaving.
When we get home, we say a low-key hello to the older dog and mostly ignore the younger dog until she settles down a bit (though we do say hello to her too). If we let her out of her crate right away she turns into a 50lb heat seeking missile and getting hit with that wrecking ball while you’re still putting your purse down is no fun.
Christy says
It’s all about routine with my highly anxious Aussie/Cattle dog mix. He is anxious in general (lots of trauma when he was less than a year old) and we have worked a lot on this (he still takes Fluoxetine). When we worked outside the home he was okay for that–we put on certain clothes, picked up certain bags, and left and came back at the same time–and he’s okay when he sees my husband put on running clothes and come back in 30-40 minutes. But “unauthorized” absenses? Going out to dinner, doing errands? Oof. He is insane when we get home. He has very loud and strange vocalizations–he almost screams. We imagine that he’s cussing us out. He hurls himself at us (body slams). He shakes all over. He is too anxious to even eat the Kongs we leave him; I think he’s too anxious to even think about destroying anything. We wait until he isn’t hurling himself at us or yelling at us then we pet him until he calms. Then he finds his Kongs and works on then.
Sam says
We have a 3-year old Corgi (Sophie). We’ve had 5 Corgis over a 55-year period. We have never had the same problems with our previous pets. SA may not be the proper diagnosis for he behavior. When my wife and I leave the house together Sophie always goes to her crate. She is happy to spend her time in the crate when we are gone. She doesn’t like to be in a shut crate when we are in the house or in a shut room. When one of our grown children or grand children come for a visit she literally goes nuts running back and forth between windows barking madly. This behavior lasts for 5 minutes or so. Our grown children have learned how to calm her down by having her sit and stroking her. When the guest leaves she repeats the behavior until the car or person is out of site. She is then totally calm. This behavior is not limited to relatives. If the neighbor drives down the adjacent driveway she displays similar bad behavior, but not so intense. We don’t know what to do to break her of this behavior. We’ve probably done everything wrong so far. We thought she would grow out of it, but no such luck.
david says
When we adopted our little girl, she had pretty bad separation anxiety which was a real problem as we live in a condo. Our neighbor – you know the one – who never does anything wrong like slam the door at least 20 times a night (no exaggeration), smokes where she wasn’t allowed, etc – complained. We tried everything we could think of. While she wasn’t afraid of crates, being alone in a crate made her manic. Meds mostly made her worse, we think because she saw us as her safety and if she didn’t feel well and we were not around, she panicked. We were nearing the end our rope as we could not understand what was going on even though she generally was otherwise settling in.
Finally, in desperation I invested into a remotely accessible camera to watch her behavior when we left and learned a few things. One was that it was true she would bark and howl, but something seemed to always set her off. Generally, it was a sound (the door slamming), but it could also be that she saw something out of a window. Closing the window helped with that trigger . And we found that a low dose of Benadryl (1 mg per pound) also seemed to take the edge off without freaking her out nor dulling her. Finally, we left the TV on so that the slamming didn’t seem so bad. And this combination worked as, I am sure, her finally realizing that we were, in fact, coming home and that she was warm and safe.
Fast forward a couple of years and we no longer need to close the blinds but keep up with everything else. And she has turned into a really good girl with a little help from her paw parents
PS – It is said that a tired dog is a good dog, so some good exercise before leaving also helps. As is both letting them eat as well as going to the bathroom before. After all, being hungry or needing to go to the bathroom is never comfortable for man nor beast.
Trisha says
david: What a lucky dog you have to have such smart owners that recorded her when they were gone! It’s amazing what my clients have learned from doing that!
Trisha says
Sam, you are right to question SA, because that’s not what is going on. Not sure where this high during transitions comes from, but I’d try management (don’t let run between windows when kids come) and operant conditioning–figure out what you do want her to do, and start reinforcing that when it’s easy for her to succeed. You’ll have to set up fake ‘visits,’ but that’s doable if you go step by step and make it a game. Good luck!
Trisha says
Christy: Holy moly, that is extreme! Maybe start desensitizing to ‘surprise’ absences by going outside for 1 second (literally) and then gradually increasing the time? Or even just picking up your keys 10 times a day. Start very very small and go slowly. Might help!
Trisha says
Lisa–yes to probable increasing numbers of SA recently, for exactly the reasons you describe. I haven’t seen any data yet, but it seems inevitable, doesn’t it? Good luck (and try crating her during the day when you are home, just for a minute or two with a great chew toy or stuffed Kong.)
Trisha says
Gayla, if you look at all the studies, which seem to be all over the map and are, as you said, mostly on small samples, the personality of the dog feels like the best indicator of SA potential. But I agree about the ‘hyper-attached’ question–definitely need more research.
Trisha says
Adam: Toss that guilt away! As long as there are no health issues, your dog is probably fine. He probably sleeps the entire time you are gone. (Try recording to see; it’s fascinating to see what they do when we’re gone!) Your Sheltie sounds like a lucky, lucky guy. I’d rather not leave a dog that long either, but, then, most of us would rather than work, right? Another dog might make your Sheltie’s life better, but might do the opposite, depends on him and other dogs, yes? I’d wait awhile and let life settle down before making any big decision like that.
Trisha says
ReA: Very important point you make about arousal and dogs settling down when you go. I suspect lots of people think it will help if they tire out their dog before they go, but 1) some studies suggest getting exercise before leaving has no effect on SA, and 2) it’s very hard to really really tire out a dog. And lots of games that we play with dogs are highly arousing (fetch for example). Seems like it not that much different than kids… start settling them down long before bedtime, right?
Trisha says
As always, I wish I could answer every comment, but I love reading about all the different experiences readers have had. So many factors! I have to run now for my first ‘in studio’ Pilattes work out since forever ago–can I even remember how to drive there? But thanks for so many great comments, keep it up. And I love how many of you knew my mystery flower was Winter Aconite! I’m going to plant more this fall in places where it can spread along with the scilla I have that spreads beautifully under trees and bushes.
Adam says
Trisha
Thank you for your words of reassurance.
I agree with what you’ve said about a second dog. It could definitely make things more complicated. I am relatively new to owning a herder, and I am finding them to be quite different from breeds I’ve owned on the past. They seem to be on their own little planet, and it often seems that my sheltie only connects with other herders. Other breeds don’t quite “get” him. I have definitely come to love his quirkiness
Vicki in Michigan says
I want winter aconite in my yard, too. It’s always the first YELLOW in my neighborhood. 🙂
The only dog we’ve had with serious SA developed it as an older dog (10, 11-ish). She lost her “sister” dog, and became more and more and more bothered by being left at home alone when we went to work. Eventually she’d be distraught by the time we got home.
We finally bought her a puppy. They were never friends. Had you asked her “Should we get rid of the puppy?” her answer would have been a resounding “DUH! Like YESTERDAY!!!”
But she was no longer distraught when we got home from work. She was fine. Even though the puppy was crated at first, she was THERE. The original dog was no longer ALONE.
I believe it made all the difference.
With the last dog, I talked to him more and more. (We rescued him when he was a year old, and believe he’d been stray for the first year of his life.) He’s the only dog who has ever become housebroken because I told him that poop belonged OUTSIDE, not on the hearth…. He also quit trailing the TP across the hall and into the study when I told him it was NOT his, and he should leave it alone. For a dog who did not grow up in a house, he was very attentive to language, and seemed to understand A LOT.
When we left the house, I told him how long we would be gone. Just a minute. Not long. Going to work. We’re going to be gone for a very long time, and Cathy is going to come and take care of you.
It seemed to me he was less concerned about our leaving when he knew what the plan was. Maybe it was just because *I* felt more relaxed about it. Who knows. I would totally be telling any future dogs (in fairly constrained language) how long to expect us to be gone.
He never seemed to be all that upset about our going (nor upset when we got home, as long as he wasn’t crated — he clearly was very unsettled in a crate), but I do believe he was calmer, all around, when he had a clue what was going to happen.
Alice says
I think someone has already said, but I agree winter aconite, beautiful!
diane says
I am lucky since I really never saw severe SA with any of my dogs. I wonder if some mild anxiety was manifested by some of the dogs we had through the years when I notice a few scratch marks in corner woodwork when I wash floors. Whether these scratch marks are from mild SA, or other anxiety like not feeling well – or there was a mouse or some spider or bug – I don’t know. But if SA, it was pretty mild. When we leave, I say “we’re going to work now”, and my husband says “You’re the boss now”. Silly, but effective if they consider those phrases a cue that we will be coming back and we just gave them a job. We’ve never crated when we leave, but we have had only one dog in our household at a time. Upon returning, our dog is greeted with treats, especially good treats if we went to a restaurant, and praise for doing a great job of “watching the house” (although our dog might think watching is sleeping). We are happy but not over the top with our greeting.
Karen Rhodes says
This is really interesting.
My previous dog developed hearing loss toward the end of his life and I think that might have brought on SA. I made a lot of mistakes with him and when he was younger would make a whole song and dance about leaving and he would go crazy and got so much fuss on my return. It took the best part of a year to correct that.
I now have another dog and was totally led by him with how long I could leave him. He had barrier anxiety as a young pup but after working through that I started leaving him for very short periods and building the time up. With him I just casually left the house and when I return he wasn’t fussed.
Being left for short periods is very normal now and most of the time he doesn’t bother to get up and greet me on my return.
This stuff works, thanks so much for sharing.
PS it’s spring here in the UK and the blossom is just emerging on the trees!
Kelly Schlesinger says
This is food for thought! I think my 7-year-old BC knows what I am planning long before I leave the house, from watching what time I get up, when I shower, what clothes I put on (especially which shoes!) and whose gear I get together (just my purse or purse plus treats and harness). If other dogs are like this too, maybe the stage has been set long before the last few minutes and so they really have less impact than we have thought.
Mary Ellen Stack says
I have always greeted my dogs happily with a pet and treat when I came home but not excessively. I never had a dog with SA thankfully. I worked with my last dog when she was a puppy with some exercises I learned from a seminar I attended by Dr. Dodman on SA.
When I was leaving I would hide some treats and then tell her to go find them so she loved it when I left the house! I lost her a year ago to cancer and still miss her very much.
Jenny Haskins says
My current dogs are pretty good. We just say, “Crate Time” and the dogs all go to their own designated crate and wait for their biscuit.
This is to prevent any squabbling in our absence as well as to minimise barking
Of course sometime one or two have ‘crate time’ when I want to work with one dog alone.
Their crates are all out on our (extensive) veranda and they are open so when we are home the dogs can go o
into a crate if the fancy take them.
I haven’t closely read the research, but it seems to me that the important thing is that dogs get alone time even when you are at hom eiwht them
Melanie Hawkes says
I’m not sure if Upton has SA, or if he just reacts to sounds. And being a failed assistance dog, he’s been known to open doors and get into mischief while I’m not home. My house becomes a fortress when preparing to leave. I’m just glad he hasn’t thought of opening the fridge while alone – not yet anyway!
I have a great camera that records when sound and motion is detected, and notifies me when sound is, and I can dispense treats from it too. He certainly does bark while I’m out, but I’m pretty certain he’s triggered by external noises or a fly in the house 😊
A trainer suggested that I leave him with something special, and have been giving him frozen kongs as I leave, and a treat ball on my two work days a week (when I leave him the longest). He had diarrhea recently, so I was feeding him much less. I skipped the kongs and gave him only the treat ball. And guess what? He reacted much less! He had antibiotics for the last 7 days and continued to behave better. I ran out of time to fill his ball today and gave him a kong only, and he’s barked more already. Goes to show how the right enrichment can make a difference, and diet can influence behaviour… Well at least in his case.
Cathie Clark says
I adopted a twelve year old poodle six months ago who quickly showed signs of SA. Techniques from books and YouTube weren’t working, so I decided to get him a companion. I adopted a ten year old poodle from another rescue – same size and sex – to be his brother. The second dog has stronger SA symptoms than the first! I have had dogs all my life but these two are proving a real challenge. I love them both to pieces and am determined to work through the Separation Anxiety, but it is very difficult. The minute I leave, the younger dog cries and frantically scratches at the door until I return. His older brother just plasters himself against the door but does not vocalize any more. I am gone no longer than 45 minutes – watching and listening on my camera app. Our vet has prescribed CBD oil, Zylecane and a calming probiotic but nothing has helped my younger dog. I would feel like a failure having to resort to doggie Prozac, but seeing my younger dog so anxious makes me incredibly sad.
lin says
Gosh, this takes me back. We got Pupper in 2002, when she was about 4 years old. My husband works from home, so she wasn’t alone in the house till maybe 4 weeks after we got her. We crated her, but she bit at the crate, and we were afraid she’d damage her teeth. She was very well house-trained, so we let her loose, but she scratched the back door terribly and tipped over the dining table trying to climb to the window, and drooled so much that my husband thought it was pee when he first got home. And she barked. A lot. There wasn’t much literature at the time, so we started her on Clomicalm and followed the behavior instructions including low key exits and entrances. Also tried to mix up our leaving cues (get keys, but sit on the couch. Put on coat, go into the kitchen). I don’t know if the low key exits helped much, but low key entrances did. If I got home before my husband, Pupper would be frantic, jumping on me, trying to lick every part of me. To keep from soothing her, I had to go to the kitchen and put on the timer for 5 minutes, and ignore her until it rang. She actually did calm her greetings down after several weeks (I’m sure the medication helped. )
Mr. B is completely different. He is a little anxious when we leave, and when he comes back he is very excited (he actually keens like a small child screaming), but calms down a minute after being petted and fussed over. I’m sure we made some unconscious behavior changes, but they were very different dogs.
Chris from Boise says
None of our dogs have (yet) exhibited SA at home, but it is unwise to leave them alone in a hotel room. They understandably don’t understand that it’s now ‘home’, albeit briefly. I had occasion to stay with Rowan and Obi for three nights in a one-room cabin with plumbing in a separate building. This led to the unexpected problem of what to do when I needed to use the facilities, as neighbors would not appreciate the barking that would ensue.
I recalled your standard advice of leaving for a nanosecond, then increasing the duration bit by bit. As the dogs love to learn, we made it into a game, and within ten minutes, they ‘got it’. Chris leaves, Chris returns within a few minutes, cheese happens!
This obviously worked only because it wasn’t real SA, and Rowan and Obi are training-savvy, but it also only worked because I had the training tools in mind: split the behavior into itty bitty bits and build from success to success.
On that trip they also learned “hotel noise = cheese”; it didn’t generalize immediately from hotel to hotel, but upon each new hotel a bit of practice when we arrived changed their minds from “border-collie-ALERT/bark!” to “oh please let there be another noise so I can show how calm I am!”
Laura says
Wow, what a great post. Yes, it is Spring here, but it being the mid-west, Minnesota, even though it’s supposed to be in the 70ies this weekend, I’d not be surprised if the other, snowier shoe dropped in April. Here’s to hoping that doesn’t happen. Anyway, none of my dogs have ever had Separation anxiety, but I’m betting that’s because they usually go where I do. If I did have to leave them home alone, Marlin and Torpedo could be trusted to be loose in the house. They’d usually just sleep where ever they wanted, but Seamus liked to chew on things. I don’t think it was related to anxiety, but was just because he liked to do it. I solved that problem by putting him in his crate, which he didn’t mind at all, and even though his chewing stopped all together as he got older, I still crated him whenever I left. All the dogs were happy to see me when I would come home, but it wasn’t an anxious greeting, just a typical goofy lab/retriever joyful that you’re home greeting. I’ve never had to retire a dog into a household where they would be left alone for large spans of the day, and that would be my only question regarding this subject. Since my dogs are almost never alone throughout their lives, would they, or could they develop SA if they might go to a home where the person is gone for most of the day? I’ve made sure, that whenever I had to retire my dog to another home once his working life was over, he went to a home where someone was always with him. Marlin was adopted by my parents, and my mother was always home with him, and Torpedo went back to live with his puppy raisers, who took him everywhere. I would’ve been working from home for the first part of Seamus’s retirement, and then even if I did have to go back to the office, my husband would’ve been with him, so I suppose we won’t know. In any case, I always appreciated how relaxed my dogs all were about being left alone. None of them cared if I was gone, which was just fine with me. Now, I’m just waiting until I can get my new dog. I hope it’s soon. Traveling without one is such a pain in the butt.
Maria says
Thank you for the great post and links to the articles!
I’ve fostered about 10-ish shelter dogs so far and several of them have had separation anxiety. For all of them the best way to deal with it has been repeating the leaving ritual, starting from me walking calmly to the door and then back to what I was doing, slowly increasing the difficulty level from touching the door handle to actually opening the door and finally stepping outside for a second. The criteria I’ve had for my fosters is that I must repeat the exercises so long that they get bored of me doing them before I increase the difficulty, and if they show any sign of anxiousness, like getting up from resting and coming to me, I get back at the lower difficulty level. Through repetitions I can increase my moving speed and the randomness of the routine, but at the very beginning it’s important that I do things in exactly the same way so that the dogs can predict my behavior. I’ve found that it helps them when they know what’s coming next.
In my country it’s illegal to crate dogs so they have access to the whole apartment and we go fully at their own pace. With one foster I made some 40-ish to 80-ish repetitions a day, but it sure was worth it, because on day four or so I was able to leave him for 10 minutes and when I came back he was still sleeping. Since he was adopted he hasn’t shown signs of separation anxiety at all.
So I guess I do desensitization to the point the dog probably gets bored and wishes me to be gone already. I always try to have them notice me leaving, because I think it would do more harm to just disappear when they aren’t looking. My leaving is a learned trick of some sort, and I do always tell them to wait and be nice. Once my fosters and my own dogs have learned the leaving ritual completely I can leave them pretty much whenever at whatever state of mind. When I get back however we greet each other happily and I give each of them scratches, and soon they all go to resting again. I am no dog trainer and haven’t taken any courses so I don’t know how ideal my process is, but it has seemed to work so far.