If there is anything harder than euthanizing a beloved dog for serious behavioral problems, I don’t know what it is. And yet, sometimes, that is an option that dog owners have to consider. These were some of the hardest cases I worked with when I was seeing clients full time. I would drive home, sick at heart, and wonder why the hell I hadn’t found an easier way to make a living. Often I’d run into people who would say “Oh! What a wonderful job you have!”, no doubt envisioning me spending my days running through fields of daisies with Golden Retriever puppies.
As hard as it is to talk to clients about whether to put down an aggressive dog, it is nothing compared to what the owners are going through. Euthanizing a physically healthy dog, one who is joyful and loving part of the time, is surely the hardest thing a dog lover has to face. My intention here is to help people considering the option of whether to put down a dog who is seriously aggressive, in hopes that I can provide some guidance. I’ll get the conversation started, but I greatly value the input of you as a reader, if you have any to share. Let me start by asking that we agree on a definition of “canine aggression.” For the sake of our discussion, let’s define aggression as an action in which a person is either injured or at clear risk of being injured by a dog. We all know that a great deal of what is labeled as “aggression” is defensive behavior, but for the sake of our discussion, let’s focus on consequences, and not what we think is the dog’s intent.
First and Foremost: It is No One’s Decision But Your Own: This is both a blessing and a curse. Clients often asked me “What would you do if it was your dog?” I can never answer that question, because I’m not the one who will have to lie in bed at night thinking about what has happened. What I can do is start by sympathizing, and saying that I am so, so sorry that anyone is in the position of having to consider putting down a physically healthy dog because of a serious behavioral problem. It is exhausting, heartbreaking and terrifying. When I talk to people in this situation I emphasize how important it is to be kind and compassionate toward themselves, as if they were facing a serious illness. Their brain thinks they are. I ask them to surround themselves with good friends who are truly supportive, and to shake off any harsh judgements or unhelpful advice as best they can.
Usually conversations about serious behavioral problems include three primary options for dealing with all serious behavioral problems: 1) Keep the dog and work with a trainer or behaviorist to mitigate or manage the problem, 2) re-home the dog if it can be done safely and responsibly, and 3) euthanize the dog. Needless to say, option three should only be considered if options one and two are not viable. But how do you consider if they are or are not? Here are criteria that I suggest everyone consider:
1. Risk Assessment: No one begins a conversation about whether their dog should be put down for aggressive behavior if there haven’t been several incidents (or one horrifically serious one). And every dog owner has to know that if “it,” the aggression, happened once, it might happen again. That is true even if the dog is carefully managed and the owners work hard on a treatment plan. The question is, what is “it”? What are the consequences if “it” happens again? I was once called by a public health employee about a case in which a dog had damaged someone’s face so badly it required 400+ stitches to repair. The dog had then been given away to someone else, and ended up mutilating a child’s face, arm and shoulder. Would it be possible, I was asked, to work with the dog and make it safe? Yes, perhaps… anything is possible. But there is always a risk that it might happen again, and in this case, “it” was a horrific injury to an innocent person. Who would be willing to risk that kind of damage to another person. Of course, a seriously dangerous dog could live in a cage with extremely limited social contact, but that brings up the issue of quality of life (which I’ll discuss later on in this piece).
On the other hand, if “it” happening again means that your dog has growled at someone, then you might be in a very different conversation. Growls and snaps to people aren’t acceptable either, but just because a dog growls at the delivery man when she’s ten months old doesn’t mean she is going to be a dangerous dog. There are lots of dogs who can be turned around, or at least managed, as long as the owners acknowledge that the behavior needs addressing, and can find good advice about how to do so.
Thus, anyone in a conversation about euthanizing an “aggressive” dog has got to ask themselves two risk-related questions: First, if the injury was to another person, what risk does your dog pose to others? How would you feel if your dog put someone in the hospital? Second, what are the consequences to you? What is your legal risk if there is another incident? Are you willing to lose your home owner’s insurance? Defend yourself in a lawsuit? If the bite was to you, can you spend a year healing your hand from a bad bite that keeps you from writing, or playing the violin as a musician? In addition, and essentially, everyone has a different tolerance for risk. Can you live in health knowing that your dog might badly injure someone if you forget to lock a door? Some people are fine with a background level of risk, and in addition have little trouble following a rigid routine to keep things safe. Others aren’t. Owners have to ask themselves which category they fall into.
2. Do you have the resources required to a) manage the dog so that everyone stays safe, and b) work on a treatment plan? Loving a dog is not the same as having the knowledge or logistical ability to treat a serious behavioral problem. Love, I’m afraid, is not always “all you need.” I have seen innumerable clients who loved their dog, but who simply didn’t have the emotional or logistical ability to manage and treat a serious aggression problem. As much as I want to help save as many dogs as I can (my training business was named “Dog’s Best Friend” after all), I feel tremendous empathy for people who, through no fault of their own, simply can’t cope anymore. Perhaps they have been living in fear of their dog for years and are emotionally exhausted. I saw hundreds of people in that category: women who were terrified that their dog would turn on them with no warning, as it had in the past; men who lived in fear that their dog would bite another neighbor and the lawsuit would destroy a lifetime of hard work. It is easy for some to dismiss such people, and argue that they themselves would never give up on a dog, no matter what the dog had done. But be careful of making judgments here: I have seen people whose lives were almost destroyed because of an aggressive dog. People who hadn’t had company for over a decade and whose marriages were on the rocks (or over) because of it. A woman whose dog stalked her through the house and held her hostage in the upstairs bedroom at midnight while I and a colleague drove up outside to capture the dog and save her. One of my clients stitched up a long, serious bite wound in fear that getting medical care would force her to consider not keeping her dog.
3. Can the dog be re-homed? Aggression is often context specific, and if it is triggered by predictable, and manageable stimuli, then the dog might indeed be able to be re-homed. Perhaps the dog is only dangerous around children, and the current owner has three young ones. A home might be found that doesn’t include children. BUT… and this is crucial: Just because the new owners don’t have young children doesn’t mean the dog won’t be exposed to them. What about neighborhood walks? What about visiting grandchildren? This scenario can work, I’ve seen it work many a time, but the new owners absolutely have to be clear that no, just because the dog seems so sweet to them doesn’t mean it will be equally sweet to children. The new owners must understand that the dog has to learn to go into a crate, in a closed room, if kids come to visit. Perhaps the dog only goes outside into the backyard instead of being leash-walked in a neighborhood with children. All these details depend on the facts of the case, but what never varies is that responsible re-homing is dependent upon the risk assessment discussed above, and an objective, clear-eyed evaluation of what is required to keep people safe around the dog.
Free to a good home in the country? Oh, how often I have heard that. Yes, it is true that some dogs do much better outside of a neighborhood or city environment. I have had numerous cases of dogs who thrived in a different setting than the one in which the aggression occurred. However, you must keep this in mind: People who live in the country are not hermits. We have visitors of all age, shapes and sizes. We have delivery men who pull up in noisy trucks and leave as soon as the dog barks, often more than city dwellers. We have hay delivered, the LP tank filled, and the meter read. We have feral cats and wanderings dogs who show up when you least expect them and have no time to cope. Thus, yes, there are some cases in which dogs can be safe and happy in a rural setting instead of an urban or suburban one. But it is not a panacea, and the details of the case are crucial to making it work, or not.
Is there another home out there? This can be the heart breaker. Just because it is possible for a dog to be rehabilitated in a specific type of environment doesn’t mean that it is available. How many people can cope with a dog who has a history of serious aggression to people? How many prospective owners have the skills and a life that makes it possible for them to do so? Finances must also be considered. Any aggressive dog should have extensive veterinary work to ensure that illness or pain isn’t causing the behavior. In addition, working with a trainer or behaviorist can be expensive. There are indeed people who are able and qualified to take on a dangerous dog–some of whom read this blog, bless them. I have taken on a few dogs in my own home myself. But there simply aren’t enough people out there who are willing and able to take on an aggressive dog, and the number of dogs who need a new home far, far out number the homes available to them.
4. Quality of life for the dog. What about the dog? I’ve worked with dogs so fearful of ___ (fill in the blanks) that they were clearly suffering for much of their life. What of the dog whose only joy in life is going to the dog park, but is dangerous around any and all strangers? What of the dogs who have unpredictable aggressive episodes that may or may not be reflective of some kind of untreatable electrical storm in their brain? The question about quality of life for dogs with serious behavioral problems is just as important as it is for dogs with physical problems. (See here for a great blog about when to put down a sick or old dog.) This is another question that only the owners can answer, but in this case it is important to get an objective opinion. I’d advise someone who comes into your home and observes the dog there. Behavior at home isn’t always obvious when a dog is outside of the house, so try to have your friends or a behaviorist, veterinarian or trainer help you here.
I want to circle back to where I started: Yes, of course, there are people who have dogs euthanized with less thought and consideration than we would like. But there are many loving, responsible dog owners who have had to face this soul-scorching decision who have agonized over it. They deserve our sympathy. No one makes this more clear than my friend and colleague Phyllis D, who wrote about the difficult decision to put her dog down because of its aggressive behavior. She still gets comments about it, as do I in a post I wrote titled Love, Guilt and Putting a Dog Down. If you have anything to add that you think might help someone in this position, I’d be grateful if you added in your comment. If you are or have had to face this decision, I am so sorry. Know that no matter how smart and hard-working and dedicated and dog-loving and responsible we humans are, we can’t always fix everything. A tough thing for us all to accept. While you try to do so, take care of yourself.
MEANWHILE, back on the farm: A much happier place than the conversation above! We are beyond sick of winter here, but take our joys when we can. This weekend Willie and Maggie got to play with Max, a new friend to Maggie and an old one to Willie, although we lost touch for a few years with the owners. Max is a six-year old Border Collie who is equally squishy and sweet to people and dogs alike. He loves to play “race horse,” Willie and Maggie’s favorite game, and we got to watch the three dogs run and run and run in huge, yard-gulping circles around the fields.
Willie and Max also love to play in a way that Maggie doesn’t: Both of the boys think it is great fun to lunge toward the other to stop their forward progress. “Ha! Smashed you in the face! Isn’t that fun?” I consider it a highly inappropriate play behavior from Willie, and was interested when Max did it back to him.
Hmmm, I thought, how will Willie feel about being on the receiving end? I watched it happen with a bit of concern, but Willie appeared to be thrilled that yet another dog knew how to play the best game ever! Maggie response was along the lines of: “Well, if you’re going to play like that I’ll just stay over here.” Thus, all three dogs run and run and run, but you can see from the photos that Willie and Max are the primary play partners, and Maggie is the third dog out. Exactly as she wants it!
I had hoped to get some photos of the wild turkeys that have been all over the fields lately, no doubt coming out of the woods in search of new food sources. But of course, when I had my camera the turkeys were no where to be seen, but when I went in search of them I ran across a huge group of Canada Geese settled on a field. Lovely animals (although pests in some contexts).
Can you see from these photos how very black, white and brown our world is right now? And why we are all so starved for color? Will we see tiny green shoots in a month or so? Oh, how beautiful that will be. It’s hard to imagine how sweet a quarter inch of green can be until you’ve lived through five months of black and white.
Monika says
Always a sad situation, it just makes you feel like you failed them. Thanks for posting on a tough topic.
Kat says
I have nothing but the deepest sympathy for those facing this kind of difficult choice. I remember our wonderful trainer telling us ever so gently when she first met Finna that not all dogs can be rehabilitated. And I know that in other hands Finna would almost certainly have been put down, we certainly considered it often enough. And I know that for a couple of years I had regular fantasies about her developing cancer or some other very serious disease so that we could choose to put her down with a clear conscience. And I know the unbelievable amount of time and effort that has gone into getting her to the point where I’d say she’s about 70% safe. And the management that still goes on and probably will for the rest of her life which is likely to be another decade or more. I also know that if Finna had been properly socialized and had a consistent set of expectations from the beginning she’d be an absolutely incredible dog and the longer she lives with us the closer she gets to being the dog she should have been. I think we made the right call for us and our dog but I would certainly never presume to judge anyone else for making a different call for them and their dog.
Sarah M-S says
We’re currently revisiting this exact question with our physically healthy, fear-aggressive young adult beagle, Bently. “Soul-scorching” is the correct term for it. Thanks for this post, Dr. McConnell–both for the content, which gives my husband and me one way to frame our conversation about this decision, and for your even-handed, empathetic approach to a terrible subject.
Margaret Couture says
i have a mutt for lack of a better word who is almost 3. We have gotten two bloodhounds 4 months ago and Benji has become very aggressive with us since. Nothing we do seems to have helped and are concerned he may bite our nieces and nephews who are all under 8. Any advice or suggestions as to what to do in this situation would be greatly appreciated. Thank you
Anita says
I can comment on euthanizing aggressive dogs from the standpoint of the person to whom a dog has been aggressive. When I was a child, I was savaged by a Saint Bernard belonging to a friend. I had known this dog most of its life, and played with it without incident. One day I called the dog to come to me, and it ran to me and bit one of my ears off, and caused a laceration that required 182 stitches to close the other side of my scalp. This dog was given away, to someone who should have known better. It killed a child in that household. The dog suffered from a form of epilepsy.
Personally, I would not hesitate to euthanize a dangerous animal, as long as a reasonable attempt had been made to make the animal safe for those around it. Better to put one down, than risk the animal falling into an abusive or neglectful situation.
elissa cline says
one thing that was not discussed … finding a vet that will euthanize for behavioral issues. i have met a few dogs that are at high risk for future bites and yet finding a vet that will PTS the dog was impossible. the client either has to do a behavioral consult with the vet at the office, or will not do them at all. it makes it all the more difficult. so if i recommend PTS i have to know a vet that will give my client the final ‘clearance’ to this sad solution.
Pam Macdonald says
Such an excellent article. As an animal welfare officer in a Local Authority for twenty two years in the late nineties and during the twenties when the Pit Bull hype was at its height, I faced this dilemma day after day, with breed specific legislation exacerbating the decision making. I mourned every dog that died, but as much for my all encompassing belief: “that a dog’s last sickness should never be home sickness”, as for the horror of the termination of a vibrant canine life. So many of these dogs were abandoned when the legislation sought conditions involving expense i.e. Insurance, neutering etc. The fact that it was not a known and loved touch and voice that assured and soothed during a euthanasia was to me the greatest tragedy, the perpetual sorrow and the harshest reality of irresponsible dog ownership.
Jackie D says
Yes, a tough topic… we’ve considered it.
Reading the link to Phyllis’s blog, she seemed to be implying that with all biting dogs escalation is likely. I was under the impression that if a dog has bitten at a particular level, that escalation is unlikely unless the dog is put under more extreme emotional pressure (or it has a deteriorating physical condition).
So if the dog has, say three times done a level 1 bite to joggers in the park (not my dog!!! this is just an example) then I thought the chances of him suddenly doing an unprovoked level 3 attack on the owner at home were pretty much zero, and management say by muzzling and leashing when out on walks would be sufficient to keep everybody safe.
pattie boy says
Last year I adopted a Papillon who was ‘great with other dogs’ who turned out to be very dog and people aggressive. I tried very hard for two months, working with a behaviorist, trained him to wear a muzzle and a gentle leader, but he continually went after my much smaller dog. And then my 75 year old mother, who had only ever just tossed treats to him. It seemed that I was the trigger for all this behavior – he was fine at the behaviorists house with other dogs and people, but when I was with him, he would lash out. I am pretty sure it was resource guarding. I was in over my head, and I had to make a very difficult decision to return him to the rescue (I waited until they found a foster with experience in aggression) It was the hardest thing to do, but since he was spending all of his time in a xpen or crate to keep my family and other dog safe, he didnt have much of a life with me. I did what was best for him – and my other dog. I still miss him, but in the end I did what was best for him.
Heather says
Thank you.
Terri Reid says
We have a dog who absolutely hates children. After biting my grandson, we went the trainer and behaviorist route to no avail. If he has access to children, he stalks them and attempts to bite. This is a dog we adopted at 11 months old from a breed specific rescue. We were not told of any of these issues. Though we talked about possibly having him put down, we have decided for now to manage him. When grandkids are here, he stays in another room or is boarded. The rescue offered to take him back but we were afraid he would just be adopted out again and cause turmoil in another family. Management works for us right now because we have no children living in our house.
Nicole says
I wonder if we can expand the conversation just a little, to include euthanizing a dog for behavioral issues, not just aggression. We made the hard choice less than six months ago to euthanize our dog, Shanoa, due to her uncontrollable anxiety issues. She was just under six years old. We worked with a veterinary behaviorists, struggled with the peaks and valleys of her escalating anxiety for years, and reached a point where her quality of life was so compromised that we had to make the decision. There are so few resources out there for people like us; was she a risk? Possibly – she was a Doberman, and with her fear and anxiety she certainly could have been a bite risk. We managed her so carefully. We did see some signs of aggression on occasion, but really, the decision was made because her quality of life became so poor.
My friend Crystal of Reactive Champion wrote a lovely blog post about our journey: http://reactivechampion.blogspot.com/2014/11/holding-on-and-letting-go-in-memory-of.html
Rebecca Wilhelmi says
Thank you so much for your article. I am a fairly new trainer ( 5 years), but do a lot of rescue work and help train fosters too. I have been asked several times if a dog needs to be put down. I ALWAYS refer them first to their vet, and then a behaviorist and I ALWAYS tell them I am not qualified to advise on that.
However I will be giving them copies of your article to help them make better descions.
Thank you.
Rebecca Wilhelmi
( friends with Angela Murray and Karen Johnson, my mentors. )
Cathy says
Thank you for the article! My family and I lived this nightmare years ago and I have never gotten over it. I was told by three very well respected trainers to put our dog down before she was 1 and 1/2 years old. I couldn’t do it. She was fine with my older daughter and I and was always on a leash in the house. I “managed” her with a large family and my four children and their friends in and out of the house until she was three years old (how I did it I don’t know, but it was a 24/7, 365 day a year job). My son forgot to tell his friend the dog was in the gated off kitchen and he came through the gate. She ran over to greet him, (someone she had known since she was 8 weeks old) he leaned over to pat her and she bit him. Thankfully, he wasn’t hurt badly, but we were all traumatized at what “could” have been. I am in tears as I write this almost 10 years later. It is not something that I will ever get over.
Harley Harrington says
I have people write me everyday and ask if I can give them advice to help with their aggressive dogs. I am very careful what I say to these people because as you stated in your informative post, what works for an aggressive dog in one situation may not work in any situation, and the last thing I want on my conscience is giving advice to someone only to have that advice back fire and be the cause of someone getting seriously injured. In my mind there are two kinds of aggression, the kind you can fix, and the kind you can’t. Dogs who show aggression over territory, resources, and even some mild forms of dog to human aggression such as growling and snapping, can be successfully worked on providing you have a reputable trainer to guide you.., but, if you have a dog that has a history of biting people with the intent to cause harm,..well it has been my experience,( which has spanned over 45 years raising, training, and working with German Shepherds,..) these dogs are not reliable under any circumstance. I never tell someone they should have their dog put down, I just refuse to work with that dog, and leave the life and death decision to the dogs owners. It is never easy.
Trisha says
Thank you Kat for sharing your story with Finna with us. There are so many important things you emphasize in this journey you have taken with her, including the need to be realistic about how much you can accomplish, the need for management, etc. But most of all, your love for Finna shines through with your every comment, and warms each and every one of us.
All best wishes to Sarah M-S, our thoughts are with you. And to Margaret, asking advice about an aggressive “mutt”: I can’t give you any good advice from this distance, so I hope you can find a good trainer or behaviorist to help you. I am interested, however, that Benji seemed to be fine before the hounds came. What if you boarded the hounds for a week and had a chance to see if the behavior would resolve? Also.. have you had a good medical check yet? Either way, paws crossed. (But do be sure that Benji is never in the presence of niece and nephew, okay?)
Stacey says
Great article. I am very involved with my local dog shelter and work very hard to help as many dogs as possible, but I have come to realize that there are worse things that can happen to a dog than to be humanely euthanized (unfortunately, I’ve seen those worse things a number of times), and also that sometimes there are no other options for an aggressive dog.
I’ve also got a dog who is wonderful the vast majority of the time, but is highly reactive. It’s genetic – we were a foster failure since he was 8 weeks old (now 3 years old), so we know he wasn’t mistreated. He has a special dislike of men who smoke (taught to him by my older dog, a rescue who we have figured out over time was most likely abused by a man who wore a tool belt, a hat, and smoked). I never, ever thought his barking at strange men would escalate, until he put his mouth on the man who is helping remodel the bathroom (a heavy smoker, and of course it was the hand that holds cigarettes). He didn’t break skin, but that was the incident that finally got me to acknowledge just how serious the situation is. We have already set up our first meeting with a certified animal behaviorist. I’ve got the time, money, and resources to deal with his issues, and hopefully with behavior modification and intensive management there will never be another incident – serious or not. I hope.
Trisha says
Anita, thank YOU for adding the perspective of the victim. What a chilling story, along with a tragic ending. I was involved in a court case involving 3 dogs who had killed a 12 year old girl. I will not tell you the details, because I wish I could erase the images of her death from my psyche and I don’t want to add them to yours. But this kind of knowledge does change you, and has an undeniable effect on your perspective.
elissa: Good point about finding a vet who will euthanize a dog for behavioral issues. I’d suggest contacting a veterinary behaviorist if one could, although I do understand that this can be expensive.
Jackie D: You bring up an important point about whether bites tend to get more injurious as time goes on. I’m going back to my favorite answer: It depends. I’ve seen injury levels stay the same, but I’ve also had many cases in which they increased in severity. I’d have to go back and look at my cases histories, but I don’t remember many (if any) that were less injurious as time went on. I suspect that we don’t really know enough about what the factors are, although I agree with you that an increase in pressure or an illness can worsen the bite, but I suspect there are other factors. But good point, thanks for adding.
Nicole: Thanks to you for expanding the conversation. I first began the article for any behavioral problem, but then ran into problems writing the piece; it is already SO long! But you are right that fear and anxiety too can cause tremendous suffering to dogs, and must be considered equally with physical suffering. Thank you for sharing the post about the journey, and for reminding us all that we must keep the health and safety of dogs in our heads and minds as well as our fellow humans.
Robyn says
Thank you for posting on this topic, it is very helpful and important to be willing to have the conversation. When you say “First and Foremost: It is No One’s Decision But Your Own” …. I can attest to the truth in that. I am sure it can be very difficult sometimes to leave such a hefty decision completely up to others, but I was involved with a euthanasia recently that highlights the importance of this. The dog was a foster dog that I had been the secondary foster for. The primary foster had known this dog for 4 years (since he was a puppy), and through two adoptions (and returns). After a year of behaviour consultations and training, the rescue made the choice that the risk this dog posed was just too high. For the primary foster, the hardest part in grieving has been the fact that she didn’t get to make the choice. We both logically understand that it was likely the choice that had to be made, and we often go through the 4 things you mentioned above to reason why it was the right choice. But it is so much more difficult to cope when that choice was out of our hands.
Joyce Rutledge says
I helped rehome a year old dog with one of my neighbors. Within a few months, I received a frantic call saying he’d bitten a guest in their home and they’d talked to their lawyer, who advised putting the dog down. Animal control allowed them to keep the dog quarantined in their home for a required 10 days with strict conditions. Unfortunately, they were unable to keep the dog contained, and he escaped the house. My neighbor panicked, called me, and said he was relinquishing him to animal control on the advice of his lawyer. That would be a death sentence to the dog, with euthanasia after the quarantine period. I was horrified. The lawyer hadn’t met the dog. They’d not called a trainer, behaviorist- not even the breeder. I suggested they relinquish him to our local animal shelter. I volunteered there and knew the breeder would be contacted, as per their policy. Thankfully, he did this, insisting I took the dog in and handle their “vicious” dog. Long story, I know, but I ended up with the dog, as an agent of the breeder. I had him assessed by a trainer/behaviorist, and as I expected, this pup had no aggressive issues. He’d had no rules or boundaries and was allowed do do as he pleased in his rehome situation. I enrolled him in basic obedience classes, where he was an eager and willing participant. He got his CGC certification on his first attempt! I’ve had him now for almost 3 years and had not one problem. He is still an active, bouncy boy, with boundless energy. I shudder, thinking of what would have happened had my neighbor not contacted me. Sometimes there are solutions that don’t include the worst possible result. And listening to advice from someone who has never met the dog probably occurs more often than not.
yaters says
Thank you for this article, Patricia. This means a lot to those of us who were faced with that heavy decision.
After having to have our beloved Pyrenees euthanized almost 1.5 years ago, we still fall deep into grief and guilt over our decision. He was my heart and my joy. We rescued him at 12 months of age and within 2 months he started becoming fiercely protective of us. Never an issue towards us or his companion dog, but extremely aggressive towards all strangers – human and dogs alike. We worked with 5 different trainers and tried him on 3 different medications over the 7 years we lived as shut-in’s. We walked him after dark, we locked him away in the bedroom or sent him off to board with our vet on the rare occasions we had guests or traveled. Upon returning from a short trip we learned he had attacked one of the staff. Fortunately they weren’t hurt badly, but at that point we were out of options. They were the only ones willing to work with him.
It was the most difficult decision we’ve ever made. Filled with shame, embarrassment, inconsolable grief and never ending ‘what ifs’.
Did we try hard enough? What if we would have tried “x” first…? We failed him. All mantras that still run through my heart even though my head knows better.
My heart goes out to anyone else going through this. No easy choices, but no judgments here.
Sarah says
Wow, another amazing post. It is such a hard topic to deal with, and it’s something that as a dog owner I constantly keep in the back of my mind. We have an oversized lab-husky-maybe-dane mix who definitely looks scary, and while she has the personality of a butterfly, her size and appearance tend to make her scary to strangers (she’s also only 10 months old, and is still working on that maturity thing).
At a dog park a few months ago we encountered a four year old girl who was walking a bit ahead of her parents and Chara got up in her face. While it was clear to us that she was just excited to check out this little person whose face was the right height for sniffing (loose tail wag, happy pant), the family acted scandalized, scooped her up and told us to “control our dog.” This incident scared me–what if Chara had knocked her over? Had tried to initiate play? This was an off leash dog park, and while Chara has great recall, I didn’t even have time to think about calling her back to me after this kid appeared round the bend. How quickly our day could have gone from a pleasant romp in the dog park to a nightmarish experience! And all because, in my opinion, that little girl’s parents had exercised poor judgement in bringing their four year old to the dog park (I mean, it’s a dog park, not a kid park–if you don’t want your kid to be approached by off leash dogs, don’t bring her, and especially don’t let her walk ahead of you).
That being said, I think another element of this conversation should be the circumstances–what defines an aggressive dog? What happens when you’re stuck in a situation where other people view your dog as aggressive, even if it’s an unfair assessment? It hammers home for me that you can be in a place where you feel like you’re under control, and then a new, random element is introduced that can shift things, and turn a typically non-dangerous dog into one who is capable of hurting someone.
marney says
I rehab emotionally and physically abused dogs. It’s been 10 years. The ones that were rehome were great and very fulfilling. Then the ones that can’t. I’ve been put in the position to adopt. Unfortunately, I had to make the decision with my veterinarian to euthanize due to aggression or mentally ill. Maybe, both. Currently, I have 2 that can’t leave the house and yard. Difficult to have people over so I don’t. It’s isolating. But, I’m have an illness that’s kept me home mostly so it works for my lifestyle. I do believe that it’s best to do what’s best for the human and dog. Sometimes, it’s a necessity for the dog’s true happiness to end their time on earth. It’s a struggle, painful and gut wrenching decision. Thanks for writing an important article that people don’t like to talk about but necessary.
Martha Palermo says
We rescued a 9 mo Newfoundland male and eventually decided to euthanize him. He was one of my favorite dogs and I learned so much from him. He was unpredictable and could be your best friend one minute then he would back up and lunge at you. I was not yet a certified trainer but had some experience training my own dogs and shelter dogs. I naively thought I could fix him. I sought help from a behaviorist, my vet, and several trainers. I read everything I could about aggression. My favorites were Pam Dennison’s Bringing Light to Shadow and Emma Parson’s Click to Calm. (Emma later became my KPA instructor.) Managing an aggressive dog is extremely stressful for the entire household (other pets included). If he was not in his crate we had to lock the doors to the house in case someone dropped by. I walked him in remote places and strange hours. Thankfully he never bit anyone but the management took its toll on us. With the support of many people (including my wonderful vet) I decided to put him down. We had young children in the house and it was too risky to have a 150 lb aggressive dog in that environment. I learned: An aggressive dog can be sweet and loving most of the time. You cannot pass an aggressive dog on to someone else. It is your responsibility to keep others safe from him and keep him safe. Lastly, you can’t fix every dog. Now that I have more knowledge I often think about him and wonder if I could have done more. I do know that the whole house let out a big sigh of relief when he was gone even though I was heartbroken. It was the hardest thing I have ever done.
Dee says
Thank you for this article. We had to make this very painful decision a couple of years ago. We tried 3 different trainers, all kinds of testing was done to rule out medical issues, medicines were tried, etc. but ultimately THAT decision had to be made. I still can’t talk about it, I’m sitting here in tears as I write this, my head knows it was absolutely the right decision due to the danger, but my heart is still broken, and I don’t know that I can ever forgive myself. Hopefully some day I will.
Susan says
We were in this situation several years ago, with a Golden of all breeds! Scarlett was a sweet puppy, very toy and food driven. I had high hopes of competing with her until I found out that unregistered dogs could not compete (yes, they can now). She began retrieving everything and anything that wasn’t nailed down. She was especially fond of retrieving pine cones – something we had an unlimited supply of.
At about 4 months old, she started to get very selective of who she liked and who she didn’t like…. and just because she liked you yesterday – didn’t mean she liked you today. She would not growl a normal dog growl at strangers.. she pulled her lips full back. She even scared me. This behaviour was getting out of control. She started to growl like that even at our other Golden. He was a very even keeled boy and didn’t react to her but would just lower his eyes or walk away.
When she was 3 years old we got another puppy. At first she was very good with the puppy. We watched her even try to get the pup to play tug with her. But then one day she decided the puppy was prey and tried to kill him – literally. She picked the puppy up and shook him and thru him. We had been working with a behaviourist (who, knowing what I know now… he wasn’t a good choice). At our last visit to him she suddenly decided she didn’t like him anymore either and went from wagging her tail at his feet to attacking him. He was a large man and got her off and pinned to the ground before too much damage was done. He was lucky to be wearing a down-filled winter coat at the time. It was at that point he suggested we put her down.
We couldn’t believe that this beautiful dog who was so sweet one minute and teeth barred growling the next was the same puppy we had raised from 9 weeks of age. We procrastinated until one day (we live on a farm) she saw our neighbours walking across our field and took off after them. It was our neighbours son, his girlfriend – and her 4 year old daughter. I panicked! I was screaming at them to pick up the child!!! It took a couple of screams before he clued in to what I was saying and at the last second picked up the child and put her on his shoulders. As it turned out, Scarlett thru a pinecone at their feet and backed away for them to throw it. It was then I realized just how little trust I had in our dog.
We made the decision to put her to sleep. Our vet told us that he had 3 (yes, three) other goldens from that litter that, in his opinion – should also be put to sleep. It was the Tuesday after Easter weekend. We took her into the vet office and there was only one other person and dog. She acted like she wanted to go visit… wagging her tail and happy faced (of course I was not going to let that happen!).
We took Scarlett into the room and lifted her up onto the table. My husband stood on one side of her and I was on the other. Our vet approached her – she liked our vet – and talked sweetly to her. Suddenly – truly out of nowhere she went into full blown attack. She literally turned into Cujo! I grabbed hair and skin on one side of her and my husband grabbed the other side. Our vet was up against the wall truly terrified!!! We took Scarlett back outside (muzzled) and once we were in the van and she had calmed down, we unmuzzled her and gave her the whole bottle of tranquilizers that our vet had given us. It took about 30 minutes for them to seem to start working.
We took her back in and without incident – our vet gave her the lethal injection.
My husband and I cried and cried. She looked so peaceful and sweet laying there… she was such a beautiful looking dog. I’ve never gotten over that dog… I truly believe that she had some serious mental illness; but we’ll never really know.
Sorry this was so long.
Melanie W. says
Re: Nicole’s comment about having to euthanize for fear/anxiety. I had a very similar situation with my 3 year old cat. I took him in as a kitten as a favor for a friend of a friend. Unbeknownst to me at the time, the mother cat and her kittens were feral. Initially, Salem was fine as a kitten with me and other visitors, and he got along fine with my two adult cats. I then went through a period when I was living alone with no roommates and my primary visitors were my parents. Salem got along fine with them. A year later, I got married and Salem went from being a friendly kitten to being extremely fearful of anyone that was not me. With just me in the house, he was a perfectly normal cat. Anyone else, including my husband, he was utterly terrified and would hide in the basement rafters for days at a time, never coming out.
Interestingly, he did end up forming a strong attachment to a greyhound we adopted at the time (his interactions with Apollo were just adorable). Over the course of the next 2 years, we tried everything we could think of to desensitize him to his anxiety over strange people, including training, medications, etc. I could not rehome him with anyone because he was terrified of strange people. In the end, the only people he could tolerate was me. I had to make the horrible decision of euthanizing a young, perfectly healthy, beautiful cat because his quality of life was relegated to hiding in terror whenever anyone other than me was in the house.
To this day, I still have guilt over having to make that choice, even though logically it was the best thing I could do. Emotionally I was a wreck, and I am always thankful that the vet was so understanding of the situation (even he was upset that there was nothing more that could be done). I think in the end, as was pointed out in the blog, one has to try to step back and look at the quality of life of the dog or cat (or any animal) and balancing that with what our heart wants to do. This, I feel, is the greatest responsibility anyone must undertake when becoming a pet owner.
Janet says
Thanks for posting this. Fourteen years ago we made this decision about our dog. He had attacked us on several occasions – the last time coming across a room when there had been no interaction with him. He was two years old, was 28 inches at the shoulder and weighed 45kg. On this last occasion he bit me between my shoulder blades as I swung round to protect myself – and I knew in that moment that we could not keep ourselves and him safe. We had worked with a behaviourist and our vet. He had been diagnosed with thyroid issues – but we hadn’t been able to stabilise him. Both supported us in our decision which did help. He was PTS quietly in our arms and fourteen years on I am still in tears as I talk about it – and I still feel guilty. The only real comfort is knowing that it was peaceful and dignified and it was not taken out of our hands. It is the hardest decision to make. My head knows it was our only choice at that time. My heart was broken by it.
Michelle says
The one thing that you had not mentioned here is the use of nutraceuticals or pharmaceuticals. I was facing the prospect of putting my dog down and sought help through a behavioral vet who recommended that we try the nutraceuticals and counter conditioning and desensitization training. My “rabid werewolf” started turning into a calm, loving dog within weeks. We have a long way to go but the “meds” have made the journey easier on the both of us as well as the counter conditioning training which involves treats, love and praise. You hit it right on the mark when you mentioned “the electrical storm in his brain”. I still see this as every once in a while for absolutely no reason he will growl and lunge at someone. When in my home alone with me he is a lovebug. When someone that he does not know comes to visit he is put in his crate and I ask my visitors to toss food at him so I can condition him to strangers. Out and about he is always on leash as he is still afraid of children and I never know when his brain will “ping”, as I call it. He is only 14 months old and I am hoping that through maturity and confidence he will get better but I probably will never take a chance of letting him run loose without a muzzle. He bit me a few months ago so I know that I am not safe either. I am bipolar so I understand the electrical storm issue and what he must be going through. I am on meds that help me so I am hoping that this does the same for my dog.
Sara says
This is something I’ve struggled with over the years. I have a dangerous dog. One that has never bitten. But that’s my management, not his decision. I love this dog to bits, and he’s amazing. He’s learned soooo many tricks and such (even paints) but he will lunge at anyone who looks at him. He’s terrified of strangers. I’ve worked with him for 6 years. But we keep having setbacks.
I’m very confident in my management skills, but sometimes I worry that he’s not getting enough, that his quality of life isn’t great. But I’ve been keeping him safe for 6 years…. I won’t be euthanizing him anytime soon. But…
Deb says
Thank you for an eloquently written, empathetic article on a very, very tough subject. In my admittedly limited professional role as a trainer and behaviorist, I’ve only recommended euthanasia once, thank heavens, but lived with a dog who I considered putting down numerous times because of her behavior. Her issues were all fear based and luckily for us with a year of intense, intense (did I say intense?) work and training she came out the other end comfortable in her own skin and able to live in society. She lived to the ripe age of 16. She taught me a lot but the uncertainty of how it would turn out and anguish going back and forth about euthanizing her was some of the hardest times I’ve faced.
Chelsea says
This was such a fantastic article – thank you for weighing in on something so difficult. I found a lot of sympathy and comfort from your words, because I am still healing from making that tough decision with an adopted 5 year old dog 2 years ago. She had ten bites on her record (I think I was too naive to take seriously at the time due to her incredible charisma in person) – one being a Level 4 to what she interpreted as an intruder (owner was not home and he entered her yard). She also had several scuffles with her dog sibling, and was a known small animal hunter (left outside a lot and killed birds and squirrels). Her previous owner just couldn’t handle her anymore and wanted to euthanize at my place of work. I chalked a lot of it up to a bad housing situation, and a lack of routine (her owner was gone much of the time and she was left un-exercised and alone). But I ignored how powerful those ingrained habits are in a dog over the course of 5 years. As I got to know her in my house, I realized she was living with an unbearable amount of anxiety. She couldn’t be contained in a crate or away from me without panicking. I had a roommate at the time who thankfully could babysit her while I was at work. But to keep others – animals and people – safe, I had no choice but to crate her when no one was home because she was an escape artist.
Her triggers for the first few months seemed predictable, and I watched her like a hawk and could tell from her body language when she was starting to stress and about to snap. After a few months – with regular hiking trips (she was trained to wear a basket muzzle) and agility/enrichment she would seem to get better, and then snap again, unpredictably. Medical work up showed nothing – and I consulted several trainers who all suggested she was most likely just genetically predisposed to this and her living situation cemented it.
Well inevitable, a mistake in management happened and she bit someone in the leg while I was there. I loved her so much, but I had to ask myself what I was willing to sacrifice for this dog. What kind of quality of life does a dog that is this unpredictable have? What kind of quality of life would I have with a dog this unpredictable? I am in my 20’s and was looking at several moves within her lifetime with me – would we start from ground zero each time I uprooted her and myself? Could I ethically rehome a dog with this much aggressive history when severe separation anxiety is a part of the equation as well? If she ended up in quarantine at animal control due to a bite – how would such a stressful experience affect her and her behavior at home? I decided to let her go :-(. It still causes me anguish because you always ask yourself if there was SOMETHING ELSE you could have done to save her. Some days I don’t think I did enough – some days I know I gave her the best, most active and fun time of her life and let her end it peacefully with someone she trusted completely.
Jay says
We returned our adopted dog to the shelter we adopted her from, on the advice of the shelter’s behavior specialist. I hope and pray they found a home for her, but if they didn’t I will always regret not being there for her if they put her to sleep. She was highly reactive to people and dogs–everyone who was not in our family. We had no yard to exercise her in, so walks were merely stressful management exercises with as much counter-conditioning as we could manage, until she attacked a pedestrian who we couldn’t avoid. She also was ambivalent toward my son, bit him several times without breaking skin, even after over a month of counterconditioning to accept him. She also bit one of our visitors and broke skin. We loved her but we couldn’t continue to keep her in our home without extensive training, and we didn’t have the facilities to keep her under threshold in our crowded neighborhood and busy house of children and their often-visiting friends. People who don’t own aggressive dogs don’t understand that most of the time how sweet and loving such dogs can be when they aren’t being triggered, but the management of their issues can take over your life in a way that may or may not be something you can live with. You are stuck with a number of possible outcomes and decisions, none of them good. I wish the shelters had a way to reliably assess dogs with high risk of aggression and were more honest about the risks with a dog who may at first appear merely (and we were told) “sweet but shy.” I don’t want other families to have to go through what we did.
Sandra Magee says
The statement “love is not enough” keeps going through my mind as I think about the two fear aggressive dogs I’ve lived with in my lifetime. Koli, a Sheltie x Aussie, lived 16 yrs. I credit him with my introduction to the world of aggression in dogs and my passion for training dogs. Fast forward 23 yrs and once again I find myself with another fear aggressive dog. Dazzle was mistrustful of other dogs. He was okay with small dogs but anything bigger than him caused him to worry and growl. He never had the freedom to go on a walk or hiking because we might encounter an off-leash dog. He wasn’t allowed to run in our pastures because the neighbor’s dog fence fight. Fortunately, I recognized the behavior and was able to prevent him lashing out at other dogs mostly by avoidance and micro-managing him at all times. It was a 24/7 hr commitment and one not taken lightly. I’d consulted with behaviorists, read tons of books, gone to seminars, etc. looking for help with this dog. When he was 3 yrs old I considered euthanizing him but just couldn’t do it. I loved him dearly and he was such a joy to work with/train and just hang out with. He was incredibly intelligent – far more than any Aussie I’ve ever had. Dazzle died last November at 12 1/5 yrs old. I miss his smiling face, his energy, his snoring at night, his love for me. The household is much more relaxed now and I find I can breathe easier without having to be on guard always. But I will always miss my incredible buddy.
Michele says
Thank you for this thoughtful article! I have a border collie who has shown signs of aggression. Actually, I think I met you at one of your talks just as I was considering euthanasia. Fast forward about four years, and I have been able to give her a quality life with the help of medication and will never ever judge others for using meds or choosing euthanasia.
Susan says
I am currently dealing with this situation in a very young dog. Going forward with my decision to euthanize will still be difficult, but I hope in time I will be able to live with it.
Amanda L says
Thank you for opening this discussion. I have had to euthanize a beloved dog for increasing aggression. He never bit a person, but it was becoming clear to me that the likelihood of that happening was increasing enough that I was seriously worried. It is beyond traumatic even if you know it is the right decision. The most supportive and helpful comment I got was from a co worker who said that his brain is part of his body, and it wasn’t working right, just like kidneys fail. It is extremely unhelpful when well meaning folks tell you that every dog deserves a chance, that every dog can be saved. It simply isn’t true. And euthanasia is far from the worst thing that can happen to a dog. The stress of living on edge all the time, as many aggressive dogs do, is worse. Thank you for this thoughtful post.
Lynn Barth says
I am so grateful for this article. Even 4 years after having to put Joey down, I still feel sadness. I saw his face on Petfinder. I was familiar with the shelter where he was, which was a high kill shelter in a more rural county outside of St. Louis. I read numerous times about NOT adopting a dog based on looks. My husband and I went anyway and after Joey shot out, exuberant and fascinating to look at, we couldn’t leave him. They thought he was about 6 months to a year old. We had a 9 year old Westie at home. Joey, the rescue, would have put baseball’s most beloved outfielders to shame, with the grace and athleticism of his reaction to a racquetball. The first 2 years were fine. Then he started nipping. We asked anyone that approached him not to put their hands out to pet him. Most didn’t listen.
Eventually, we couldn’t take him out. We were nervous having people to our home. He’d bit/nipped at me twice. He’d go under a table and if I reached for him, he’d growl in a menacing way. We had a trainer and 3 behaviorists working with him. He was on medication.
After he bit me the third time(deeper, but no stitches needed), my husband, a kind and patient man said, ” That’s it.” I cried, ” Please don’t take him away.”, even though I knew, down deep, the truth of our situation. We tried one more class, which was for dog on dog aggressive dogs, and only had 4 in the class. The trainer, a woman with obedience ribbons lining the walls of her facility and a tough ex St. Louis city cop to boot, observed as something hit Joey and he became unhinged. After class, with Joey in a crate, we had a quiet discussion.
Joey had 4 1/2 years of love and possibility that would have never happened had we not taken him home that day at the shelter. But, our Westie my very first dog (at age 47 !) and Joey was the second. I never had to euthanize a dog before.
I’ve come to understand the gift that Joey and I gave each other. I hope this article is a comfort to any of you that face the sadness and the necessity of this situation.
Carol Kaune says
Thank-you for posting this article! I had a behavior Foster that we ultimately decided to euthanize because of aggression. We had worked with him for a long time desensitizing him to his triggers (people, dogs (while on leash), bikes, kids, runners…) and made great strides (and went through a ton of chicken), but he had such intense ‘stranger danger’ fears that his lunging bite attempts & successes made him a tough adoption candidate. Like you said in your post the unfortunate reality of finding a successful home is extremely low probability.
Any change in his environment made his little speckled head explode. He would grab the nearest blanket and start suckling in what seemed like an attempt to block out the world that strssed him out.
He was the sweetest dog around those that he knew, which was the hard part. But he was so uncomfortable in his own fur that it didn’t seem like a quality life. The hardest part for me was housing him during his 10 day bite quarentine. I could not bear the thought of his last 10 days being in court holds at our shelter, so he spent them in his happy place. My solace was that this guy had a loving and adventurous ending. Many hikes, lakes, canine play sessions and cuddles.
I called him my ‘Speckled Mess’, loved him dearly and will never forget the lessons he taught me!
Stephanie Balogh says
We rescued our bloodhounds litter mate at 1.5yrs old. He had food aggression and aggressive if you tried to put him in a car. He overcame most of the issues but the food. My husband was the only one who could feed him. Otherwise he became so very loving. 4months in her bit my daughters high school friend on the leg and buttocks when she came to visit but never growled before the bite. He seemed over excited. That’s when it began and I became the target. After my bloodhounds got into a fight one day, I was looking him over and he began growling. Stepping back I put my hands up as to say ok I am sorry. He lunged for me in a full dog attack and full dog attack voice. My husband pulled him off me. I needed stitches but never went because I was afraid he would be taken away. After that he would growl when I kenneled him and started growling if I got up at night. I was afraid to re enter my room. I had 2 teenagers, one who was home alone after school and he began growling at her. I was sick with feer for my daughter and myself. We paid $2500 for fear aggression training. He even stayed with the trainer and showed aggression to other trainers. The trainer blamed Me for his behavior me for being afraid of him. He seemed to be improving at home after he returned and then he began going “Kujo” for no reason. We followed training plan and went to social events where he wore a basket muzzle for the safety of others. He began attacking the bank door when I would try to let him in from playing outside. He attached me again 8 months later after first event. He turned one husband when he tried to help me from the lunging and latching bite. We had been trying anxio remedies and had already had a full work up at vet but nothing had shown anything. So why? I was certain he was sick but no one could find it. But that last day I had to make the most horrible call to my vet on a Sunday to put him down. It was a hour and half drive to our vet and friend. Fred’s wore his muzzle all the way there. He was so sad and sorry as he always was after an attack or crazy growling episode. He was miserable and hated being like that. We put down a very healthy dog and it just about killed me. The trainer still blames me for not trying hard enough. But I did and it made me sick. Someone else would have either beat him or he would of ended up in a kill
Shelter. What if he had hurt someone else or a child if we gave him away? This was a heart wrenching decision that I tried anything to fix the issue. I wanted the doc to find a disease because we could fix it. I still wonder if he had something we missed. It has taken me 4 years to become less afraid of strange dogs. I was even afraid if my other dog for no reason.
Thank you for this article because no one really understands what the handler goes through when making these decisions that are heart wrenching.
Donna says
Thank you for this article. As an owner of a very agressive dog, I’ve thought of euthanizing Wally often, Wally has two bite records and numerous unreported (me and my husband). The problem is I love him too much to consider. When he’s good he’s wonderful but when he’s in “his mood” he’s terrifying. He has severe separation axienty and is currently on an anti-depressant. Sedatives make him worse. We’re unable to board him, take him to dog parks, have people in our house or yard. We have to basket muzzle him and then sedate him completely for vet visits. Fortunately we have a fantastic vet. We’ve spent thousands of dollars in behavior classes only to be told this is the best he will be and some recommending euthanizing him. My husband loves this dog with all his heart can can’t imagine putting him to sleep. With that being said, it’s important for all families members to be in agreement with this decision. My fear is Wally is now eight years old and will his aggression get worse as he ages.
Lara says
We have a very very dominant female rescue. We’ve had her for about 7 years and she’s always been a challenge. She respects my husband but challenges me, has food aggression, and selective dog aggression. My husband has worked with her with obedience to commands and it has certainly helped. I’ve worked to become more of a leader with her. But, it’s still there…when she’s tired, when she’s hungry, she has a button. She snarls, she snaps and it’s hard. She’s come up to me to be pet and then snarled and snapped when I’ve reached out. We have 4 other male dogs and cats. She lives in our bedroom, is fed and sleeps in there and has her “out” time by herself and with just us (we have 3 acres). She is very OCD. Everything has to be the same, and I think this is part of what triggers her. She’s playful, happy, (even happier to have “her” space without the other dogs around). But, I feel like we are on borrowed time. We’re lucky, it’s just my husband and myself, so we can control her environment and the household, but it’s hard. We will not rehome her. I don’t believe that she can be trusted and i would never want to find out she had been abused, discarded again, or neglected by someone who wasn’t able to handle her. So, she has a good quality of life, we get along ok, she’s happy on “her” space, and we’ve all adapted. Oh, and she’s is lightly medicated. That has helped to level out her moods for he past month. The vet called it “doggie Xanax”. So, for now, we are hopeful and we enjoy her. I think it’s hard with the rescues, not knowing their past, not knowing what has created this, I guess you can just love them and care for them as best you can. Thank you for the article.
Karen says
Thanks so much for this article. It is much more sophisticated and nuanced, considering many more decision making factors, than one I saw on a different facebook page earlier this week. This will be the one I share. Thanks again 🙂
Concetta Harrington says
I have a choclate retriever who I love to bits! He loves people and he used to love dogs…he has been attacked and bitten by various dogs in his lifetime since a 6 months old puppy. He never reacted until after few times when he was around 1 year old. He was never aggressive to people but even so I have to confess I went through a face when I was wishing a sudden illness or accident so we had a reason to put him to sleep even though it killed me the idea! Going out for walks had begun to be like a nightmare always watching for other dogs approaching(have to say if owners would be more responsable maybe many issues would not occur!)and shaking and risking injurying myself when trying to contain his lounges. Called in a very good trainer passed on by my vet and after 2 years of training, intense training we are now enjoying a different life even though is never or hardly ever off the lead. We have long lead up to 10 metre and his recall has improved and he is much better with other dogs around even if not too close.With patient owners we also had some approaches resulting in lovely moments. But It is an ongoing proces and probably will be like this for all his life…all this to say that in some cases and with the right approach there is light after the tunnel. We now have another lab gril who is 1 yearand 4 months and after careful introduction they now love each other and certainly she has helped him in the process. Never had issues with people with him as he absolutely loves everyone but I was terrified that he could cause harm to other dogs(he is 34Kg)or worst kill them and risking to have him taken away had become my worst nightmare. I sympathize with evryone who has to face this tough decision as I was horrified with my dog of the possible outcome, but do try everything before and make sure you choose a well qualified trainer/behaviourist if you have it it is worth every single penny! Take care out here!
Carol says
Such a thoughtful article, Dr. McConnell, and you raise so many good points. I feel like the discussion often comes down to the variables you mention, but with an important caveat–every single dog one adopts has a risk of behavior issues, and I think people should know there are no guarantees–just like with people. To me, every dog is a bite risk if they are pushed far enough; when people don’t recognize that and put the dog in a stressful situation for it, the risk escalates and comes with the surprise “but he/she never did…”
I saw you many years ago with my rottweiler, Doppler, after he had scraped/bite a neighbor. At the end of the day, Doppler was a wonderful dog for the immediate family, but basically needed to be ‘managed.’ I had to transition from being a relatively relaxed/basic training/permissive dog owner (my prior dogs were easy compared to him) to one who provided consistent training, structure, and yes, vigilance. Once an owner becomes aware of the risk, well–I was never able to not be conscious of it. The lesson that took me so long to learn is to think of it in terms of providing a safe environment for Doppler–to not put him in situations where he would stress, or to allow people who were “good with dogs” to try and interact with him anyway. People who love dogs often want to love all dogs, but it isn’t fair to dogs that can’t take that kind of unfamiliar relationship. Doppler got to be in the house with people he considered ‘family,’ but if people who weren’t close visited, he was put in a gated room, for his and the visitors’ sake.
So that was my second lesson, and I think it is one that perhaps came out of your talks or books: there’s nothing wrong with avoiding the problem and setting everyone up for success, if interventions and training are too challenging or unsuccessful. Rather than worry about him and visitors, we gated off. Problem solved, for the most part. But it does mean a different relationship than I first expected, which circles back to my first point–like people, there’s no guarantee on what will develop.
Stephani says
Great article. It is something we all need to think and talk about.
I am a dog trainer and I also foster difficult dogs for my rescue. I have had to euthanize three dogs and every time it was agonizing. When I have clients that call about their dogs, many of them are grateful to just talk to someone who has been in their shoes. It is isolating, to say the least. Folks who have never had to make this decision can often be the most judgmental.
The first was a fear biter. She had come from a hoarder and was never handled. After two years of working with her in my home very carefully, she bit me when I needed to grab her (level 4 bite with multiple grabs). Unfortunately, a normal adopter or the child of a normal adopter would grab a dog in the same circumstances. This, along with her fear, meant that she was not safe and she was euthanized.
The second was euthanized for extreme fear (he came from the same hoarder, but at a different time). This guy would never have bitten. He shut completely down when afraid. Medication was tried over the course of two to three years. He would not come out of his crate. He would not eat when anything was around him (dog or human). He was so miserable. It took that entire two years to desensitize him enough so that he would eat while I was sitting 20 feet away. Outside, he would do nothing but shake. His quality of life was incredibly poor, despite my best efforts.
The third was a vibrant girl. She loved me. She loved dogs smaller than she was. But, all of her behavioral issues and triggers meant that it was almost impossible to keep her under threshold outside. She was a huge bite risk to other people, especially folks coming into the home (like a first responder in an emergency). And, this girl was euthanized because I had to consider the quality of life of potential adopters, along with her quality of life. I spent over two years working with her and making very little progress. I had to consider the ethics of adopting out a dog that was so difficult that a dog trainer had issues. And, after quite a few consultations with dog training friends and my vet, I euthanized her.
The last one broke me for fostering. It almost broke me for being a dog trainer. My own dogs in the time of the final foster suffered. I suffered. She suffered. We all suffered as I tried desperately to fix her. And, I failed. The guilt and self-blame were awful.
So, now, when I talk to clients about aggression cases, we talk about the dog’s quality of life and THEIR quality of life. Because that last thing really matters. I am not saying just euthanize. But, if they can never go on vacation or never have visitors or never have children or never have any kind of fun with their dog, then their quality of life is impacted as much as their dog’s. And, when we are in a partnership with our dogs, both of our lives need to be taken into account.
David says
I adopted my first APBT 23 years ago, an obviously abused victim with many health issues. His mental instability was not apparent at first, and didn’t manifest itself until he started to become healthy. I accepted his attacks on my other dog at six months, and I started a crate and rotate routine that ended that problem. However, he began showing aggression to men seemingly out of nowhere. I consulted to very good trainers, and the result was a heightened aggression towards people in general. I was losing control in my own house as he became aggressive to me at about one year into the adoption. I knew that I could not pass this dog to someone else. I t became clear that I could no longer live with him. So, I had to let him go. He was euthanized 13 months after I adopted him.
I cannot even describe the guilt I felt at having made that decision. I was supported by my closest dog-knowledgable friends, but it didn’t ease the pain, even though in my heart I knew it was the correct thing to do. It was years before I could come to grips with it.
Thanks for this article; I wish I had read it a long time ago.
Minnesota Mary says
Thanks Trisha for this and the link to VetzInsight. I had to put down a foster who was aggressive just after Christmas 2014 and it was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. This helped me understand that, like a dog with a physical illness, he was suffering and that it was a kindness to end that suffering. Thank you.
Briana says
I really appreciate you writing on this topic. Watching a physically strong dog be put down is so hard. What it came down to for me was that, although physically strong, my dog wasn’t healthy. He was suffering mentally just as much as old dogs suffer physically. I had it easy–he had been caught in a distemper outbreak as a puppy and had deteriorated neurologically, so I at least new the cause. But regardless, a dog who is suffering enough to hurt those around him out of fear is not happy and is not living a good life.
Betsy says
Thank you everyone for sharing. I most recently fostered a pit bull mix from the local city shelter where I volunteer. While walking stray Gracie at the shelter she stole my heart and I was her “last resort’ before being selected for euthanasia due to space. I have no training except love of dogs and brought her home, followed the 2 week shut down of no introductions to people other than our household which was my husband. After the 2 weeks Gracie who was so loving to me and my husband started showing aggressive signs to other adults. I took her back to the shelter for behaviors checks etc and with a heavy heart was about to pass her to another more experienced foster when Gracie bit my adult daughter who visited. It was not a bad bite but the shelter had their rule. I still can’t get over it and have not tried to foster again. She loved me, I loved her and she became my protector. I don’t know if I blame the shelter or myself more but my heart is broken.
Phyllis Shortt says
Re; Vera Stewart and her engish cocker. I have a working english cocker who resource guards his toys/bones. It seems to be a cocker thing! He is also very hyper , so much so he suffer from exercise induced collapse. He would run until he dropped. He does not guard his food, just toys/bones. He does well with the exchange program and luckily, he only guards from the other dogs, not people. If he does get protective, all the toys/bones go away and/or he goes to his kennel for a break. We also work on give and take often to reinforce the best choice for him. give up the toy/bone, get a reward. Otherwise, like the breeder says, he’s wild like a mink and sweet like soda pop! Love the breed! Hope all works for your cocker. They are such a loving breed!
Gina says
I volunteer with a rescue group and on the Christmas eve of 2014 I had the task of taking one of our foster dogs to be euthanized for aggression. I had never met the dog personally before this day and though he engaged with me a little it was obvious he was looking for another dog to connect with he was anxious and nervous. The dog in question had basically been a feral puppy who was friendly. But he just did not want to be with people not the way most dogs do. He preferred the company of dogs. He was returned to our group for just not connecting with the owners. He was then put in a boarding situation which only made things worse. After several weeks in boarding trying to find him a suitable foster home things came to a head. He had showed no aggression towards people at all but then bit one of the kennel workers. We had no foster home for him to go to. Its Christmas eve everyone is out of town or with family and the boarding facility could not keep him any longer with his current behavior. I already had a dog of my own who was aggressive with other dogs and I was temp fostering a dog on the weekends who didn’t get along with other dogs. I knew deep in my heart someone could have helped this dog. I still feel I should have helped this dog regardless of my sanity or that of my personal dogs. I know he may never have been the type of dog to curl up on the couch with you. But he could have been the type of dog to curl up with another dog in the home. The worst part was the drive from the boarding facility to the vets office. He laid his head on my shoulder the whole way to the vet. I don’t know if he sensed I was troubled and trying to ease my discomfort or he knew what was about to happen and just wanted to connect to anyone. My heart just broke. I sat there in the vet parking lot for at least 20 minutes, trying to figure out a way to foster him myself. I was going out of town the next week and where would he go? A boarding facility was out of the question obviously. I couldn’t take him with me. No one in the group had room or could manage another dog with his issues. Logically I had no options for him and neither did the rescue. So he and I walked into the only solution I had, the vets office. They had a special room for when they euthanized dogs. I sat down on the floor with him he was anxious of course but they gave him something to relax him first and he finally laid down beside me. I stroked his head while they gave him the second shot. Slowly his little chest stopped moving up and down and he was gone. I hated rescue on that day. I know that what I did was the right thing for that dog at that time. Even if we found another boarding facility that would take him for a time he would have been miserable. The kindest thing for him with the resources we had was to put him to sleep. It was extremely difficult as it should be and it still haunts me and probably always will. I carry his dog tag on my key chain to this day so that I never forget his little face or his head on my shoulder or what could have been.
Diane R says
as a long time trainer and Rottweiler breeder/owner I have several absolutes
1) dogs that bite-or who would if given the chance, are NEVER ever to be re-homed. EVER. Either the owner keeps the dog or a trainer who has been working with the dog takes it in. otherwise the dog is PTS no exceptions
2) if you can and are willing to micro manage this dog’s every breath every day and NEVER allow it near anyone outside of the family with no exceptions. Then keep the dog and work with it
3)IF the dog is a danger to it’s own family members it is PTS again no exceptions
4) IF you have children and the dog is a risk to them the dog is PTS even if you feel you can micromanage the dog. Accidents happen and your children will pay the price
5) if the dog is not human aggressive but is instead dangerously animal aggressive, can you again micro manage the dogs every breath and make sure it never so much as sees another animal? If you want to have other animals in your home and do not have any children can you keep them 2000% separated by totally secure means? If you can’t do this the dog has to be PTS
My rules may sound harsh but I have worked with humans and their dogs almost 30 years and did rescue 10+ and also managed a large boarding kennel. I’ve seen what happens when you do not follow these rules with these dogs and it is always a tragedy for all involved
Joel says
I have been a professional trainer for only 2 yrs now and really enjoy helping ppl and dogs. Aggressive dogs can be a lot to deal with. However, often times I find the issue to be lack of rules, discipline and or exercise. Many ppl say “I walk my dog every day” or “I have a huge farm they can run around all they want” but exercise on a leash needs to be walking with a loose leash with no pulling. Running around the farm doesn’t make a dog use there mind unless they are helping a farmer herd sheep or cattle in a orderly fashion as opposed to just chasing livestock. Before I entered into the training world I got a Border Collie and as a new owner did not know the importance of a daily walk. I never had the issues that many ppl speck of that reflect in a dog that is not walked. I thought I just had a “good dog”. One day I realizes that from the day 1 I brought my pup home I was excited and teaching him tricks. Almost a new one every week and then a lot of controlled fetch also. He always was asked to use his mind and this made for a great dog. If anyone has a high energy dog, scared or aggressive dog please have a train or trainers look them over before you make your decision. Some trainers like ourselves offer free evaluations. Take advantage of this to see how the trainer interacts with your dog, how they train and how they can be of service to you. Happy Training. 🙂
HFR says
Reading some of these accounts, I count my blessings that I’ve never had to personally deal with this kind of tragic situation. I truly believe it has to be one of the hardest situations to be in and my heart (and admiration) goes out to all of you who have dealt with it bravely no matter what was decided as the solution.
I did have a friend a while ago who had adopted a mix-breed from the shelter as an 8 week old puppy. By the time I met her, the dog had already been showing signs of aggression, mostly towards her. She had been bitten quite a few times, but she loved this dog so desperately that she was in a kind of denial. While all of her friends (she lived alone) were telling her to get rid of the dog, she kept saying she could handle it. She had many behaviorist work with the dog and he had been on multiple medications. He had the kind of aggression that seemed to come out of nowhere (that now makes you believe it was some sort of seizure). She’d be walking across the room and, boom, he’d go after her. One morning he literally wouldn’t let her out of bed. He laid beside the bed and growled at her every time she tried to get up. I can’t imagine living like that, but it became her new normal, because she loved him so much. (Dare I compare it to living with an abusive spouse? It certainly looked like it, even to the point where she would hide her wounds from her friends because she knew that they would get on her case.) Anyway, she eventually did put him down when he viciously attacked a visitor to her house and only then was she convinced that she had no choice.
I love to watch and read true crime stories (yes, a guilty pleasure). After a while you do come to believe that some people are just wired differently. While I don’t believe dogs can be sociopaths, you do have to wonder, with all the research showing how similar humans and dogs are, whether the darker side of nature is possible in all of us.
Carla Brown says
I have taken on someone’s ‘bad’ dog but I am a responsible human. I never put myself or him in a situation that cannot be controlled. He is a rat terrier mix and although small, can be quite intimidating to other humans or dogs. For the last two years, I have been working real hard with him by approaching things that he hates / fears at a distance and having him focus on me. We have made some progress and this will be a lifetime challenge I think. However, I promised myself that if he ever bites anyone else (as he had done in former home – had grabbed someone’s leg calf and shook it like a rat), I will euthanize him. Altho I love him to bits, humans need to come first and I am giving him all the chances in this world.
Lisa Sites says
Thank you! I take in fear aggressive rescues and have seen Nancy Williams in the past with these dogs. I did have to put one down that after 2 years of working with him when I tried to change his collar out he came at me and kept coming. It was like a kind of brain damage and the kindest thing I could do was end his pain. I miss him still and he lives in my heart always. But he is at peace now. Blessings.
Louise-Annette Marcotty says
I feel for everyone who has written a response to this most excellent article. The two dogs I’ve euthanized for aggression hurt my heart every day even though it’s been years. I failed them.
Robert Ryder says
Thanks for an excellent article. I was hired to consult with a client late last year about a dog who had severely injured a child in a previous home, another of the client’s dogs, and the client herself. After a thorough history and assessment of both the dog and the client’s abilities for good judgement, management and behavior modification, as well as consulting with colleagues and considering the matter for myself over the weekend, I recommended euthanasia and declined to work on the case. This was only the second time I have done so in my career. It was agonizing, and the client was dismissive of my recommendation. Anticipating this, I urged the client to consult with a vet behaviorist as soon as possible if she were not willing to follow my recommendation. I wish her well, and dearly hope that she can find a way to prevent further injuries to all who will be exposed to this dog. Your article confirmed for me that I served her well in a very difficult situation for all concerned. Thank you!
Marjorie says
Excellent post, one I’m going to save and pass along to anyone having to consider such a difficult decision. I was on the receiving end of a viscous and unprovoked dog attack in my teens which sent me to the hospital. Apparently, this dog had previously attacked others as well. The day after my attack the police shot him dead when he lunged for them. If he had been my dog, I would have rather have had him euthanized than shot dead.
We currently have a dog in our neighbourhood who has a dangerous dog designation and who is under a muzzle order. This dog has gotten lose on numerous occasions and each time someone else’s dog has paid the price. Once, in the space of about 15 minutes he sent three dogs and one person for emergency care. The owner works hard to manage their dog and if there is an incendent they will call Animal Control and report it themselves. Even so, life happens, leashes break, collars get slipped and doors don’t get latched and EVERYTIME, there is an attack.
This is such a difficult topic as I think there are many dogs that are euthenized for aggression that should not be and then there are those where it might just be best if they were. I agree with Harley in that some dogs can be worked with, but when you have a dog that has intent to do harm regardless of the circumstances then it is unlikley they will be able to be turned around or adequately managed . I LOVE dogs and I live with one who is reactive, and that in itself can be a challenges at times. I know that I would not be willing to take the risk of owning a dog with severe aggression issues. I would not want to put others in harms way, but selfishly, even more, I would not want to have someone else abuse, shoot, lock-up or harm the dog that I cared about. For me, it would be better to know that the dog was humanely euthanized.
Beth says
I’ve never had to make this awful decision myself. But I have seen the aftermath of people not making the decision. I’ve been trapped in my car by the neighbor’s dog who got loose again. I’ve comforted the people whose once friendly dogs were rushed to the vet for surgery and never were the same happy social dogs again after brutal attacks. The emotional scars last long after the physical ones heal. I’ve known the folks who went to the ER for stitches and tried to downplay the situation to protect someone else’s dog.
Sometimes we try too hard. I know it is hard to euthanize a loved dog. But I would do it in a heartbeat because I also love other people’s dogs. I love other people. And they have a right to live in and walk their neighborhoods without fear.
We walk in the dark. We go to out of the way places with our dogs. We have run into and been terrified by dogs who could only go to those places because they weren’t safe in civilization.
We have a responsibility to our own dogs, but we also have a responsibility to our neighbors. If a dog is one broken leash away from seriously hurting a person or killing another peaceful dog, then we need to think of other people’s hearts and not only our own.
Darin says
Our situation was slightly different but still just as painful. Our 13 year old golden started exhibiting severe symptoms of separation anxiety. We consulted with the vet and put together strategies to help her, but in the end, it seems like the confusion caused by her progressing dementia just added so much to her anxiety, we were never able to help her. So, for a year, we NEVER left her at home alone. EVER. For a couple with no kids, this was a huge adjustment. We didn’t go out for dinner for months at a time. Fortunately, my parents were near by and could be counted on for daycare and evenings as necessary, but still life changing.
After about a year, her dementia had progressed so sometimes she was inconsolable. It looked sometimes like she didn’t even recognize us and her anxiety just couldn’t be soothed. She started exhibiting more random acts of barking (like at the piano, for no apparent reason).
Making a decision to put down a physically healthy dog, one who for 14 was still getting around very well, eating solidly, good blood work, was one of the hardest decisions ever. It is easy to explain putting down a dog who is physically suffering – people understand that. But putting down a dog who is “just” anxious and confused is so much harder to explain.
In the end, we didn’t care what others thought, and we arranged for the vet to come to the house one day. We had a lovely last day. She seemed to feel well, ran to the house, recognized us, got lots of snuggles etc. The vet has been with us for 20 years, and in fact, did this dogs chemo treatment, so she was affected by this too. But we did the right thing, and we did it well.
This was hard, and we did feel a little guilt for a while. However, guilt adds no value to our lives, and we knew in our heart of hearts that this was the right thing for her – without question. Do you always wonder if “something else” could have been done? Sure, but in the end, we all do the best we can with what we have to work with at that time. We can’t do or be any better than that.
Betsy Davies says
5 years ago, I adopted an Aussie/Collie mix, Roger, @ approx 1 year of age – great great dog. High energy, yes, but, I am willing to get him the exercise he needs. 1 year later I was looking for a companion for him and instead had my heart strings pulled at and adopted a 9 1/2 year old English Setter/lab mix, Emma.
The first 4 days, everything was fine with Emma. She let me groom her she seemed happy, and then the honeymoon was over. I would walk past her on her bed and she would growl. I didn’t hear the growl and I reached down and she bit me. She would began “stealing” toys and running into the bathroom and guarding them. If I even walked by the bathroom door she would growl and become aggressive. She also began “stealing” articles of clothing and doing the same. She began biting if she was laying on the middle of the floor and someone my husband or I would step over her. Absolutely, no aggression to the other dog at all.
My husband and I were not equipped at the time for this behavior and as it escalated, I wasn’t even thinking of rehoming her, because, I knew that someone else would either abuse her or would put her down immediately. I had promised her a forever home, and had to exhaust all resources, but knowing in the back of my head that euthanizing may very well be an option. While her bites never required stitches, they seemed to be escalating and with less warning. She was becoming more and more stressed. My husband had asked me “what if I give you an ultimatum…it’s me or the dog?” A hush fell over the room, and I finally replied, “it’s the dog. You have the ability to take care of yourself, she doesn’t. I have to help her find her way.”
I took her to my vet in tears one day, because, I couldn’t find anyone to help me – the organization I adopted her from could NOT even give me the name of a behaviorist to work with! Big mistake adopting from them! My vet gave my the name of a Behavioral Veterinarian about an hour away. I made an appointment and was told that she was severely under socialized, and as we know socializing older dogs is not the easiest of chores. Of course, she told me to get to a behaviorist to work with closely. While, at the Veterinarian Behaviorist, I saw some business cards of a dog training facility very close to me who had someone that did behavior work.
So, I started Emma in Confidence Building classes. She did well, we went through 2 6 week courses of CB 1 and 2. She wasn’t “fixed” but, I could tell that there was something there that seemed to be helping. They were starting up Canine Nose Work classes and asked if I would be interested. At first, I was like – she’s over 10, can she really do this? They convinced me. Well, this was the catalyst for us, whether it was just the time spent together and building a trust, feeding her from my hand when she found the hides? I don’t know, but I now have a very very different dog.
She is by no means perfect, she still occasionally guards – only toys/clothes – never food. And, the aggression in which she does it is minimal. I can call her for a treat and she runs to the kitchen breaking the cycle. She cuddles with me, asks for affection . She doesn’t like to be brushed at home….but, has finally allowed me to clean her feet when it rains/snows. She allows the groomer to comb and brush her without difficulty. So, some of her behaviors have changed and the rest, I manage. I WOULD DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN! She has become such a great/funny member of the family.
The best part of all of this, is that I am becoming a dog trainer, who eventually would like to get into the behavior aspect of things, and I am almost a Certified Nose Work Instructor. I realized, that there are never enough outlets for people with dogs with issues, and so many people have NO IDEA what to do. If I can help one dog have a better life, than it is worth it!
Carole says
Re-homing is not as simple as it might seem, even if you find a good home. I should have re-homed one of my two male Bostons. I had two rescued Bostons, Carla, a puppy mill mom, and Toby, a completely undisciplined male, rescued after a home fire. Then, I inherited my dad’s one-year-old, Boz. Boz and Toby didn’t get along, ever, no matter what I tried, including obedience training and special doggie behaviorist training in my home. Carla didn’t help — she was a cheerleader who egged them on. Boz and Toby had numerous physical fights, some resulting in injuries requiring stitches. These fights could occur spontaneously, for reasons I never did understand. Boz slept in a crate, so we were okay at night. Toby ate in the bathroom with the door closed. Just remembering all this is making me cry. I knew, at some level, that I should “re-home” (a euphemism for “get rid of”) either Boz or Toby, but I was too sentimental. I couldn’t let go of my dad’s dog, and I felt like I had made a commitment to take care of Toby when I rescued him. When all 3 of them had died, I swore “no more dogs.” That lasted 4 days. I got a young female from a rescue group. She is perfect, with no emotional baggage or behavior problems in any way. I am retired so I spend almost all of the time with her. Now I am fretting because she needs, and would enjoy, more exercise than I can give her. My rational mind says I should get her a companion. (She loves other dogs.) But I know that I can’t guarantee safe behavior with another dog. I would like to do right by her, but my emotions and my reason are in conflict.
F Duncan says
I had this experience a few years ago with a 6yr old rescue Border Collie. We adopted him at 3yrs old, and found that the previous owner’s testimony (as stated to the rescue) was completely untrue. He was fear aggressive with other dogs and nervous of strangers and children. I developed an amazing relationship with over the years, he was very much ‘my’ dog but managing his stress was draining. He was ball-obsessed so I walked him in quiet places and kept him distracted from other dogs, but inevitably there were dogs who were pushy and ended up bitten.
He nipped a couple of people, nothing terribly damaging but the final event was when he, without any obvious trigger and with me only feet away, flew at the face of (familiar) seated guest and ripped open his top lip and left his front tooth loose. I knew then I couldn’t predict when this dog would feel so much fear that he had to bite. I could have returned him to his rescue, but they wouldn’t have rehomed him and he wasn’t safe to live around other dogs. I didn’t feel I could keep him in our home and compromise our family life (we had two children) so much that everyone was going to be stressed. I felt my children also deserved to have a regular childhood, with friends and family able to safely visit.
I put my lovely dog to sleep, held him while he passed away. I can’t even look at photos of him now without tears, even after 6 years. I couldn’t see a happier outcome for him. But I loved him and will always remember the relationship we had.
Louisa Morrissey says
Such a thoughtful, compassionate and beautiful article. As a dog trainer I will go back to your article often because it is true that in these painful decisions with clients, we need to be realistic but also compassionate and supportive.
I have had first had experience with this myself, twice:
The first was a brilliant beautiful border collie pup I was working with. My client had mentioned some “weird” episodes over resource guarding, and we were working on trust exercises as well as resource guarding. Then my client asked me to help rehome the pup as she was too much for her, so I was fostering the pup, even thinking of adopting her as well since I had tragically lost one of my other dogs to kidney disease earlier. I was in my yard with this pup and noticed she was into something. I went to investigate and the (yes 4 month old pup) bared her teeth and bit my leg hard, then lunged toward my face. I got my arm up in time and she bit it too… three more times, the third time she held on and shook. Then she stopped, and backed away as if in a daze. Luckily I had on jeans and a Cardhart jacket and no skin was broken… but I had bruises. I knew this was abberant behavior for a puppy and called the vet, the owner and the breeder. We all agreed to euthanize this beautiful puppy. It was hard but my client also realized that it was not her fault and in that there was some relief… this puppy was born with a mental disorder that made her dangerous… and probably not fun for her (the pup) to have to live with either. We euthanized the pup in my kitchen with my client there to say good bye, then we took her ashes up to my ranch.. per my clients request. I am also glad I witnessed this before adopting this puppy out… because other than that one moment, she was an active brilliant pup. Still, it was not a happy day.
The second was one of my own dogs and myself… but with a different outcome. This dog has seizures and is on medication for that. I have been with him through his seizures from start to finish before, supporting him. The medication is working with occasional breakthroughs. The morning of this incidence he had had his rabies vaccine, with may have thrown his system off. He is a sweet, outgoing goofy lovable dog with no history of aggression. I came home from errands and he was not at the door to greet me, which was odd because usually he is first in line. I went to find him and he looked at me and ran away. I have to admit I stopped being a dog trainer at that moment and forgot everything I knew… I was only worried about my dog. I followed him and he ran away again… still I followed him, caught up to him and noticed his throat was wet… ignoring ALL of the very clear warnings he gave me, I reached to see what was on his throat, he froze, growled and then bit my face. 30 stitches worth. After a few minutes he was back to himself. I must have walked in when he was in his post seizure state. He was in an altered state and did not even know who I was. Even then, he gave such clear warnings that I stupidly did not listen to! I will not euthanize this dog (unless his medical condition worsens of course to the point it affects his quality of life). I will, however, stay away from him when he has a seizure, and when I need to leave him in the care of someone, I will only have someone who is very wise about body language, or even just board him at the vet, where I know he will get his medication and he will be safe. It did affect our relationship, I have to admit, but we are rebuilding and growing more together. I know I must help him with his disease, and be there for him… but also be safe.
shannon says
Do we ever get over the guilt? It’s been 3 yrs since I put Cheyanne down. I was losing my home, I had to move to an apt. I already had to rehome my other pack family. My mother in law owned a husky kennel. I still had two dogs and wouldn’t be able to keep Cheyanne. I didn’t have money for her vet bills. She was 10 and was blind and hydrocephalic when she was born. I knew there was no way to rehome her because she was very food aggressive. She would also fight with unknown dogs as well. I made the heart breaking decision to put her down. I still regret it but at the time that was my only option.
Jan Glancy says
This information is critical to all who foster or have dogs. I was a foster mom and have had many fosters over the years in addition to dogs of my own. I still work with rescue. Three fosters over the years were so aggressive that they were a danger to rehome in spite of training. It was the last one that was the worst.
I did not see overt signs of aggression during the month I fostered this dog. I did observe him trying to mount my male dog one time. My dog barked and moved away and that was the end of it but apparently not.
On another occasion when unobserved, there must have been an attempt to mount but there was a fight and the foster brutalized my dog with bites around the head and face. We had to put my dog down due to the extent of his injuries. The next morning we euthanized the foster dog. It was such a tragedy all around. The cost of this was nearly $2000. The foster was not aggressive to people that I had observed in my short time with him nor did he growl or snap at other dogs. He must have just quietly mounted and the fight would ensue.
He did have a bite to human history that was minimized by the relinquishing owner and in retrospect I wish I would have paid more attention to that.
I will never forget the mess my Max was or how innocent the foster dog seemed even though he was the aggressor. It was hell and I, to this day, cannot wipe the images from my mind. Aggression can have such terrible consequences and to have to live with that is forever. You really have to consider the greater good when making this terrible decision. I have great sympathy for those that must face this.
Cynthia Knowlton says
I made the very difficult decision to euthanize a 5 year old female that I had since birth. There was nothing on either side of the pedigree that had given a hint of the temperament this dog developed. She was very defensive – her attitude was definitely to attack before some one or some dog attacked her. The final straw for me was that we – she, I and a male dog were competing at a herding trial – and the only time she was out of the car was for quick potty walks and when it was her turn to compete. While I was sitting with the other dog watching the trials, I was very sad that I couldn’t have the female out at all. AND how exhausting it must be for the female to constantly be on alert – always on the look out for something bad to happen. That was not quality of life…..
Jane says
Thank you for talking about this issue. Many years ago, we had 2 beautiful Collies. Full brothers but a year apart in age. We got the 1st one as a pup from my in-laws farm. The next spring brought another litter and our son (age 1) played with all the puppies any time we were there visiting. The puppies were adorable but there was one special puppy that never left our little boy’s side. They were always having adventures together. Needless to say, that puppy joined our family as well. Both pups grew up and were very well mannered and received many compliments on the pair. (We live in the country and have those deliveries and even the occasional walker going by)
We had our everyday routine and when it was evening, I would tell the boys (Collies) that it was time for bed and they would run ahead of me to the barn. I would pet them, let them in, say good night, then close the door. In the morning, I would go out to the barn, say good morning and they came out to play for the day.
One day (the youngest Collie, “Jack” was 2 yrs. old now, the oldest,”Auggie” was 3), we were doing our normal routine but this night was different. My husband had just left on a fishing trip, our children and I stayed home. The kids and I had been searching for new born kittens that were in a hay wagon full of hay. After finding them, I asked the kids to go inside while I finished some chores. It didn’t take long and it was time to put the Collies away. I called them and told them it was time for bed. They were happy & running just ahead of me to the barn. I opened the door, in they went and I stepped in to pick something up. As I put the item away and started to leave I heard a strange noise. I turned to see Jack (the 2 yr. old) Baring his teeth at me and slowing coming toward me with a low growl deep in his throat. Something inside of me knew this was going to be bad and I looked for anything big that I could put between us but it all happened so fast. He lunged at me literally jumping up toward my face. I fell backward out of the barn with him on top of me. We wrestled out in the yard, I grabbed the long hair on each side of his face and stiffened my arms to hold back his mouth from getting a hold of my face. All the while firmly saying, “Jack! No!” After what seemed like forever, I had gotten my legs between us and still holding his face away from mine, saying his name… Jack stopped, sat down in front of me and blinked a few times. I saw his eyes change back to soft and his tail began to wag as if he was greeting me.
As my heart beat was still pounding in my ears, he was looking as if he was wondering why I was sitting with him out in the driveway. We sat for a few minutes together on the ground with me just stroking that beautiful face. Finally collecting myself, I got up and said “it’s time for bed” and my happy-go-lucky boy was running ahead of me to the barn. In he went.
I called the vet in the morning and shared what had happened and asked if he had ever heard of anything like this before. He did share some insight…but ultimately I had to work it through on my own. It took me a month to make my decision and it was absolutely an excruciating decision to make.
Throughout that month, Jack was just his sweet, fun self. But the line that kept coming back was that we don’t know what made him do what he did…and what if this happened to one of my children next? That was the one that I couldn’t ignore. The vet agreed to come to our home and put him down here. I held my sweet boy, cried as the drug did what the vet described and he was gone in my arms. The vet even carried him to grave we had made ready.
I don’t regret having brought Jack home. I’m glad that we all got to love this special boy. I will never understand why that happened that day. But I have to believe that I made the right decision. I needed to know that my family and others were safe. Jack knew I loved him all the way to the end.
I can relate to what others feel and are going through when faced with this decision and my heart goes out to them all!
Your article is so well written. Thank you for touching on this difficult subject. I wish that I had this back in 1985. Thank you, again, Patricia.
Jodi Baur says
I have a dog that requires management. I have had him 7 years, no one else can touch him. We have had some of the best trainers and that has been what has made him manageable along with the fact that I accept 100% responsibility for keeping him safe as well as others. It is not something I would wish on anyone, but has been choice. I think through every situation he will be in and error on the side of caution.
Wanda Smith says
I had a BC 5 yrs old that I had to put down due to fear aggression. She was fearful most of her life. I have a extensive library of books, DVD’s, and articles on the subject of fear in dogs and training techniques. Including many of yours, they all helped . Sometimes not right away but later. When you have a Fearful dog that you have to work with this is a big commitment and a daily thing. My dog was a dog that was not going to get completely better with all the training in the world. I was aware of this. Although deep down inside I had a glimmer of hope that I was wrong. I worked with her all the time. You developed a bond/love with each other. But I also knew that if she was in High fear mode that she would even try me. But she would have to be very High. But when she came down from the fear it was almost like she knew she did wrong and seemed remorseful. After a Nosework Trial ( Which she was very good at, and it gave her confidence) she started to decline. This trial was stressful for her and she would have been the first dog to pass that day except for human error ( only one did pass )
She did awesome! She showed no interest in Nosework anymore. I screwed up! I should not have pushed her! I continued to work with her and we entered a few more trials. She would purposely indicate wrong to go back to her safe zone. Then I stopped trialing and we just went to classes to have fun. She snapped one day at her vet visit. I had restrain her from going after the vet and myself. We got control and finished our yearly health check. I went home and balled! I knew the time was here. But to make sure a friend suggested that I assess her and see how much of her day was lived in fear. I watched and noticed she did not have a quality of life anymore. I cried often in the next few weeks. I called the vet and talked about it. He agreed it was time. I set the date. I brought her to nosework class for the last time and she was great. I believe the best one that day! (I wished I would have recorded it) I brought her herding and brought her to her Favorite place … the cabin! The day had come… I brought her to a field we use to walk and play ball and played and played. ( I had to walk her in a farm field because she was so afraid of cars and trucks. ) We then went to the Vet. He was great I had talked with him because I did not want to remember my best friend trying to bite. He arranged that we would to muzzle her outside and give her something to calm her. It worked! I had received my last wish for us. I was actually calm there and I watched and she relaxed she was at peace. I could see the difference in her appearance. I went home and cried even more for a few weeks. I questioned weather I made the right choice. But the amazing thing was she came the next morning to let me know she was okay. My other dog who we kept them away from each other most of the time. Came in the house and placed her ball in the laundry basket. Most of you are saying so, but, you see my other dog has never seen her do this. It was our special time together and he never seen her doing that. And rarely was able to have the ball. He does not do it much to this day either. So I believe she is happy now. But my biggest regret is that no one was able to see how wonderful she was. She was great in Obedience, awesome fronts and could do everything by hand signals too!We did have to work off that BC energy somehow! We even did Agility at home she loved it! I still cry at times. And hope i did the right thing. But as my vet has said many times that no one would have worked so hard on her as I did. She will always hold a special place with me. And all the titles that I have with her ( which isn’t a lot) have been well deserved. We worked harder for those titles then anybody! I will always display them. She has taught me so much more then what I would have learned with a normal dog. I hope I can put that to good use in helping someone else to have fun with their dog.
Tressie Dutchyn says
I adopted my Saint Bernard one year ago today. She had been a stray so no history was available. The shelter described her as having severe food guarding, to the degree that the ER vet had recommended that she be euthanized because of it (she had been rushed to the Emergency Vet hospital shortly after her spay). I had already informed the shelter I would adopt her as soon as she was discharged, so fortunately, that advice was ignored. It was recommended that she go to a home that could deal with the food aggression, and one where there were no young children. I met both requirements. To prepare for her arrival, I did extensive research on how to deal with food aggression. I also visited her every day for 2 weeks during my lunch hours so that we could begin to know one another. The strategy to deal with her food aggression and one which seemed easiest to implement was to feed her in a room by herself and not to bother her. It worked! Over time, she learned to tolerate my presence while she ate. This morning I petted her as she happily munched on her breakfast. This was a gradual incremental process with many baby steps aimed at her getting used to my presence.
I discovered very early on that she was dog and people reactive. So I joined a forum for Reactive Dogs that used positive reinforcement training methods and put those methods into effect. Excellent resource by the way. I also discovered that in addition to food guarding -she had object guarding aggression, for example, she bit me when I approached her sleeping area. I found the only certified behaviourist trainer in the area and described her behaviours – she advised me to return the dog to the shelter. So that was a dead end. Again back to the web, scouring professional papers, assimilating many books (including McConnell’s) – anything I could get my hands on about object guarding, and after being bitten a couple of times – went through the same exercise, including listening to all the ASPCA webinars – to learn how to ‘read’ dog and how to effectively communicate. Crash self-directed course in canine communication.
Some of it was trial and error, but I persisted, never blamed the dog for her misbehavior, and took 100% responsibility for my lack of knowledge in how best to alter MY behaviour in order to accommodate her needs. In every instance, if she was in trouble it was because I allowed her to get over threshold and then did not handle the outcome appropriately.
It’s been a year to the day. I have relocated into a quieter rural setting. I keep children away from her, and vice versa. Fortunately, I am a highly structured person with my daily schedule, rare deviations, so there is consistency and stability in her life. She gets fed at exactly the same times each day. I leave for work and am back the same time. If A happens, she can be confident that B will follow.
We’ve both grown and learned how to read one another through patience, mutual respect and most importantly a foundation of trust. She is 120 lbs. of cuddly love-bug.
Would she bite me again? Without a doubt IF I ignored her warning signs or pushed one of her triggers.
Is she safe around children? Absolutely not – but she never will be put into a position where she will be confronted by young children.
Is she safe around other adults? Yes – if they behave appropriately, i.e., let her approach them first, no eye contact, hands at sides, etc. In other words, I coach them how to behave around her, or I put her into her safe place – her own room with door closed.
I love her to bits and all the hard work and patience have paid off. She has been worth it. Raspberries to the vet who recommended that she be euthanized!
Christine Smith says
I grew up with Great Danes. We had 2 that were the best dogs I’ve ever had. The third, Major, we got as a puppy from the breeder. He was fine at first, and my parents were good trainers, but he just became very aggressive for no reason. They made the decision to euthanize him before he was a year old. The vet asked if he could be donated to Cornell for study, and lo and behold he had a brain tumor. There was nothing we could have done for him. I will never forget it. It’s devastating. Thank you for raising this issue. Unless you have lived it there is no way to convey the horror of being afraid of the pet you love. I still have dogs and I always will. I also have a realistic outlook about safety and quality of life. Every situation is different, but they are none of them easy.
Diane says
Thank you so very much for publishing this. It brings tears to my heart to even consider how difficult this decision must be. I am truly blessed with a Sheltie who speaks her mind LOUDLY but never uses her teeth… even when faced with angry geese. I will go now and count my blessings.
Sharon says
I adopted a dog from a breeder years ago. He was 11 weeks old when we brought him home. I had been around dogs for my entire life and had raised dozens of puppies, so thought that I know what I was doing. As he grew, he became fearful of absolutely everything. I hired a trainer who worked with police dogs and came highly recommended, and was extremely faithful with everything–walks, training activities, schedules, neutering–and that seemed to help, but this dog never relaxed. Even when he was sleeping, he was “twitchy”. He bit me four times, once badly enough to require stitches, and so I called a trainer that my previous trainer had recommended for aggressive dogs. I’ll never forget what he told me. “Usually,” he said, “You get the dog that you deserve.”
I was horrified. What a terrible thing to tell someone who was doing everything she possibly could to help her dog. This dog had impacted every part of our lives–and I had four small children, the youngest of whom was just over a year. The fifth time the dog bit me, I was merely reaching for my daughter’s sippee cup. He lunged for her and got me, instead. I cried the entire way to the vet, and cried all the way home. I still wonder what I could have done, but the vet and my trainer both told me that the dog probably had something wrong in his brain that made him aggressive. Logically, I know that I couldn’t have kept him, and no rescue would have taken him (I asked), and I couldn’t have given him to another person knowing what he’d done to me.
But still, there’s a stigma and a feeling of failure that will follow me forever. I loved him, and because I loved him, I had to do the hardest thing possible.
Since then, I’ve taken another dog on his last vet visit, a Golden that we got from a rescue who lived until the ripe old age of 15.5 and finally succumbed to cancer. I cried then, too, but they were tears for a life wonderfully lived, and not for a tragic life unable to be lived.
Virginia Gray says
I have been faced with this 3 times in my life. I had a dog who was agrressive as a child. He was send to a farm. Twice as an adult. I choose to put both down. They were animal aggresseive. I had not seen aggression towards humans but was told one was. I was so afraid one would get out and kill a neighbors pet. Just not a risk I was willing to take by re-homing either.
Pat Miller says
Great article, Trisha.
You mention the dog’s quality of life, and yes, that is an important consideration. I also make it a point to tell my clients that *their* quality of life is every bit as important as their dog’s, and if the stress of keeping a potentially dangerous dog in their home, or the management efforts required to make it safe to keep the dog, are so onerous as to degrade the *humans* quality of life, then euthanasia is a reasonable choice.
em says
I am so sorry to all of you who have had to face this dilemma. I know that I like to think, “If I ever…..I would”. But the fact is, sometimes you just don’t know what you would do until the time comes that you actually have to act.
If you’ve ever had to face this awful decision, please be kind to yourselves.
Karon H says
My heart hurts for anyone who is faced with situation. At present I am involved with a rescue and have 6 pit bulls and pit mixes. Two of these dogs have some issues and can at times be aggressive, knowing this I am always on alert and proactive. It is a lot of work and time but considering the awful start these animals had in life I work hard to give them a better life. The two with issues I know will always be with me and I am OK with that and the work it entails until that day the aggression is a real serious problem.
Sherry says
Last year I had to make the choice to put down our beloved yellow lab. He was 13 years old. He had always been around kids & although he had gotten slow in his age he appeared to be physically healthy. But then randomly he would strike out, almost as if he was confused, like he didn’t know us, & a few times it involved our children. He would climb in their bed to sleep, then lash out as if he was guarding it when they would come in the room, like he woke up unclear of where he was, who they were or what was happening. It was heart wrenching. After a long consult with the vet, we determined he was either suffering from a sort of “dementia” or a brain tumor. Either way, we felt his QUALITY of life had run out. Even in a home where he wouldn’t wouldn’t be scaring children, he would still experience the stress & confusion, not to mention suddenly being without his family. This was by far the hardest choice I’ve made as a pet owner. My heart aches for anyone facing this decision.
Katie says
Thank you for this thoughtful and well-written piece. It’s a gut-wrenching and yet brave decision for pet parents to make. Bringing peace to a terrified and fear-filled dog, and keeping those you love and your community safe is the right choice, even though it’s incredibly hard to come to. There are often too many close calls before this decision is made. We need to support those that are going through this and not pass judgment.
Pam says
We had a very sweet basset, Abner, who became aggressive after back surgery, which I believe was not well done. Many years later, we discovered that glucosamine and chondroitin helped his pain enough to make him lose the aggression. Sometimes a physical problem is not obvious even to the vets. Once we started him on the nutraceutical, he never again bit.
In our case, we were able to manage him so that he had very limited contact with people. It was not ideal, but we were keenly aware of the need to keep others safe. He bit me three times (twice very early on), but no one else was harmed. If only we’d known the simple solution long before. But I think once a dog bites, people always have to be vigilant. It is very wearing, and not every person is able to manage that. I hurt for people who have to make this very hard choice.
Even when you keep the dog, it’s hard to know if you are doing the right thing. Limiting a dog’s life is not a purely happy option. But Abner did live five more years. I hope they were worth it to him. There were so many “if onlys” for both of us.
Monique says
My poorly socialized blue tick hound bit me on the face after giving a warning so quick I was unable to react before the bite. I didn’t pull away and therefore was able to avoid a very serious injury. When I went to a trainer, I opened with the acknowledgement that if the situation couldn’t be fixed or managed, I would put him down. As hard a decision as that is to make, I could not be responsible for risking the lives of others by rehoming him, even to an informed adopter. We can but be responsible for our own actions, and are not in control of others who may come in contact with our dogs. So far, so good, but he has snapped at me again (no injury), usually in the same situation where he feels I have come too close to him. It is always on my mind, but of some comfort is the thought that as animals live mostly in the present, they don’t have the expectations and concerns about the longevity and purpose of their lives that we do. If I have to put him down, only I will have regrets about what might have been.
Betsey says
Looking through these comments and those on linked blogs, I noticed a few things. So many stories of “the bite was unprovoked- I just went to kiss her head!” or “he came to me for petting then snapped when I did that” or “she bit when I bent down” or “he growled when we stepped over him” and in all of those cases, the human made a mistake. Sensitive dogs find humans looming over them unnerving. Touchy dogs should not be given free pets when they ask for it, they need to earn them. It’s very sad how few people know how to read dog body language. Too many people have to learn in a hurry when they end up with a challenging dog. So much work and effort going into managing and preserving dogs with issues, so little effort being made to match adopters with easy dogs (and train people to keep them that way). So many dogs being bred with temperament issues that lead to behavior problems and so little screening. I am sad for the owners that find themselves over their heads and for the dogs that have such a hard time being confident and relaxed in today’s world and for all the “easy” dogs that linger in shelters because good homes are dealing with a poorly matched choice or one with a genetic time bomb. Or maybe the “easy” dogs are the scarce ones and we need better evaluation methods. There seem to be far too many dogs that need a really knowledgeable owner and specific circumstances and a shortage of dogs that can be a happy family member under a wide range of situations. Kudos to those that choose to take on the tough ones and give them a better life for however long they can.
Penny Howard says
Dr. Sophia Yin’s website http://drsophiayin.com/blog/category/aggression
check out her techniques. Knowing the warning signs / body language given by a dog is important to help prevent a bite or attack. Understanding your body language in the eyes of the dog, knowing what they consider aggressive behavior from you is important. If you’re going to take on a rescue/aggressive dog then management is very important as well. It’s a tough and heart breaking situation. Give Dr. Yin’s techniques a try, positive reinforcement training and behavior modification can save a dog’s life. But there are the few that cannot be saved. God bless all that take on these dog’s your heart is big and in the right place but sometimes it’s just not enough.
Robin says
I have spent most of my life with airedales and welsh terriers. The second welshie was rescued by a wonderful family. Soon after her arrival there she bit the wife and later bit the husband badly. Occasionally I work with Airedale Rescue–so I got a call to go to pick her up. I brought her home and promptly fell in love with her. I had the ability to create special spaces for her both outside and inside. I took her to a rather well-known vet behaviorist for help after I had had her vetted to find serious dysplasia in both rear hips. Drugs were added along with a strict behavior plan where my welshie earned literally everything. I had been bitten once early in the process, but had great luck with the behavior plan. Then it became evident that there were other medical issues (e cauda syndrome). This ailment attacked the nerves from the base of the spine and climbed up the spine slowly. My welshie lost control of both urine and bowel. I did finally decide to euthanize her when she soiled three beds over night, and awoke in her own wet bed. She wouldn’t allow me to bathe her, and was a danger to the groomer as well. The end came quickly for her. She had a wonderful year in my home and I still miss her wonderful games of fetch. Such a difficult decision.
I am not sure I could have given her that year if I had not had a fenced in yard with a large run on one end, the patience of a saint, and the time to spend with her and my other dogs (there were two others). I was able to isolate her when others were in the house with gated spaces. I was continually aware of the danger others would face if they were near her, and took that responsibility seriously. She bit me three times over the year, and in my case I had to get treatment, so these bites were reported here. I was grateful to our animal officer for trusting me throughout this period. Normally I would have been forced to euthanize after the second bite, but because it was me that was bitten, and no one else, and because I have been well known as one who helps dogs like this one–with success–I was given a little room. I did not walk her outside of the yard–thankfully fairly large. She was a level 3 biter. Had she not been ill, I think I would eventually have considered euthanizing her regardless, as keeping a dog like this is so risky.
To make a long story short, I believe there are times when aggressive dogs can’t be saved, and euthanization is necessary. I do believe every dog should have a chance to reform though.
I loved working with the vet behaviorist as well as my own vet. Meds do really help, and have saved my 11 yr. old airedale who has a chemical imbalance that causes misplaced aggression coupled with separation anxiety. The meds made it possible to communicate with her when she is triggered. She bit me (level 3) twice at age 2. She was not an aggressive dog, and even when in the triggered state she did not come at anyone growling–she just entered an odd bark pattern and would grab anything near her. After adding meds and getting them balanced, I have had no problems with her–though she does still trigger once in awhile. She walks with a gentle leader head collar at all times so I can control the head. SO, many times the expensive consult with the behaviorist vet is successful.
It takes very dedicated people to handle the truly aggressive doggies.
My best to all who struggle with this challenge. In the end you have to make the best decision for both the dog and your family. Sometimes it is so difficult to do.
Tristan says
Thank you for this timely post.
I have a 7 year old Border Collie mix who has fear aggression. We worked with two trainers who specialize in aggression, but didn’t get many results. Not for lack of effort. My situation is that other household members are not on board with sticking to my training protocol. Though my dog had only bitten one time, that was too many times. I have managed his time and found ways to provide a relatively good life for him. But his fear of men, dogs he doesn’t know, and a lack of impulse control have led me to make the decision it’s time to make the move and have him euthanized.
My life circumstances are making the decision a little easier as I will be traveling for an extended period of time to a place where the dog cannot accompany me. So prior to my departure this lovely companion will have to be euthanized. I will miss him, but feel in the long run it is the best for both of us.
I noticed that some people mentioned that they couldn’t find a vet who would euthanize a healthy dog. Where I live most vets will euthanize upon request.
Mireille Wulf says
I haven’t read all of the other posts. I just wanted to add how sorry I am for all the people who face this question.
As for personal experience, very limited in dog-human agression; we took in Chenak, a 4 year old siberian husky. He has bitten me once, over a piece of chicken. When we just had him. He was also aggressive towards us over bones etc at that time. Growling, snapping.
Later on we heard that he had probably bitten people in his previous home. It took time to untrain his resource guarding, I have felt scared of him in the beginning.
Well, seems so strange now, looking back, since he developed into such a wonderful dog, absolutely rocket proof amongst strangers and especially children. Much of his aggression had to do with his upbringing at his first home. In retrospect, these people were clearly out of their depths with this dog and the best thing the breeder did was drive there and take the dog home with them, where they kept him for a year in their pack of sleddogs and did a lot of good work in stabilising him.
We have had to manage him his whole life, since he was an escape artist, fierce hunter (killed rabbits and even managed to kill a marten while on leash). We only realised how much energy and effort that took when he died. Life seemed so much easier (and emptier). I really was fully trained to never leave anything edible lying around and to always lock al doors, yet he did manage to escape a few times. Moments when your heart stops for fear he might have gotten into sheep. I knew that would (could) be the end of my dog.
I have a friend who has had a seriously abused Riesen Schnauzer. A guarding breed that never trusted humans – except my friend. They have had to do some serious training and had to be careful at all times. Once a cyclist carelessly bumped into my friend and found himself lying a couple of meters further along on the ground with a big black dog standing on his chest. Oohps… luckily the dog didn’t bite him and the cyclist friends all laughed at him and told him “next time, be more careful around little blond women with big black dogs” but it scared the hell out of her. They had to manage this dog all the time. It took a lot of effort to get the dog to believe in her, to trust her judgement and to follow that judgement. She used a Gentle leader collar just so that she could have control over this dog at all times when necessary, especially around the apartment building where she lived (he guarded not the appartement but the entire building). Strangely enough, she could let him walk/run off leash in strange places: he avoided confrontation then. And although he lost his hearing, he would always respond to her when she called/signalled him to her. He died last year and she still missed him, partly because of his vulnerability – because aggressive dogs are sometimes also vulnerable. They depend on us humans to manage them, otherwise they may be euthanised. Rules here in the Netherlands have recently been revised and are rather arbitrary. Local government can decide about whether a dog has to be impounded for ‘aggression” and in one town a dog that kills a cat is impounded where in other towns dogs that have seriously hurt people are given a second chance. The dogs that have been impounded, stay in a noisy kennel environment and are then “tested” with a MAG test. Needless to say that fearful dogs do not stand much of a chance.
Amanda says
I still remember, very clearly, when we got our first family dog. I would’ve been eight years old, probably.
My parents sat us down and explained to us very clearly how to behave around the dog and how to be fair to the dog, and that we should always, always listen to them when they told us to do something with or around the dog.
They told us that if the dog ever bit any one of us, she would be put down immediately. It didn’t matter if we had provoked her. We would have to bear that responsibility. She would be gone, because of us. My parents believed very firmly that a dog that had bitten once would bite again, no matter what.
It was a very clear line in the sand for us, and it gave us very serious and immediate consequences for failing to learn to properly read a dog or treat it unfairly. I’m sure you get the sense that my parents were very hard line people about training and treating dogs correctly. It was somewhat frightening as a young kid, but combined with good guidance it worked really well with all three of us. We never had a single incident and we all have dogs as adults today that are handled well.
Our current rescue pup exhibited some fear-based defensive behavior as a younger dog, but we’ve worked slowly and carefully to expose her and give her positive associations. We also work hard to learn her evolving thresholds and not put too much pressure on her. We’ve never had even a minor incident with her. I can’t imagine how difficult the decision would be if she’d gone another route.
Lynn says
I can’t imagine what people must be feeling when considering that. I don’t have any experience with aggressive dogs, but I had to let mine go because of cancer. It was the worst day of my life and I’m still bothered by it. My dog was ill and that should have made it easier, but it didn’t. It’s never easy to make a decision to end your pet’s life regardless of the reason. My heart goes out to those that are in that situation.
jean bill says
Reading all these comments from different people i have been in tears.It’s a
Brave person to realise when you can’t help a dog anymore,to have to decide to end a animals life!. It is bad enough to have a sick animal put down because of pain and quality of life. Never mind a healthy animal.
Gayle Lay says
Dr. McConnell:
Thank you for such a thoughtful insight into this very sad and serious dilemma. As a rescuer and a dog owner, I’ve often struggled with this issue. I once owned a dog who had serious collar and body handling issues. I got her when she was 4 mo old. She was coming after me with ” intent to harm”. I managed her for her entire life. Worked with credentialed, behavioral consultants to modify her behavior. It was exhausting and nerve-wracking. She lived in a harness so I could grab her if I needed to. We went to the vet with a soft muzzle just in case. I swore that if ever the time came where I couldn’t put my hands on her, I’d euthanize her. Sadly, she developed nasal/brain cancer at age 10. The night before we sent her to the bridge, was the only time she ever let me hold her. I learned so much from my girl. Now, as a rescuer, when I talk to folks who are looking to rehome their pups due to a serious bite incident, I’m much more empathetic when I talk to them. This is such a gut-wrenching decision and no one should judge. Thank you for all you do.
Jennifer Ennis says
After reading so many replies to this topic, l felt sad yet happy to see that with all the cruelty going on in the world regarding animals, there are still many many people who genuinely care and try their best to help and provide the best for their animals. I have been in this position and had to make that hard decision, but l know she understood it had to happen. It is certainly a painful journey.
Melissa says
A number of years ago I adopted a GSD that the former owners told me was a sweet young girl of 11 months old but was an escape artist. She was indeed all of those things. Through research though I found out that at 11 months old I was home number 6 (including the breeder). From the beginning I could see that she did have some behavioral issues due to so many different homes with so many different ways of dealing with her. One home (not the one I got her from) literally put her in the back yard and tossed food at her but never interacted with her.
It was not until I’d had her for nearly a year when the former owner’s father (an acquaintance of mine) mentioned that she once escaped through the stockade fence into a neighbor’s yard and killed one of their domesticated ducks. This was why I ended up with her – since, according to the city’s statutes the dog was considered a “dangerous dog” having caused the death of another domesticated animal.
So, knowing that and having had that nearly 1 year of experience with her the issues she was having were not just because of her current environment. With us humans she was a perfect dog, smart with a willingness to learn. However, with other dogs or cats in the house that was another issue especially if the other animal was smaller than her. She continually hunted the cat when she was outside her cage. In the back yard she attacked my other dogs on a regular basis – causing numerous vet bills.
I tried for another 18 months to work with her, crating, training (obedience, rally and agility, shaping, trick training), socializing and working on her self-control. However, her prey drive/instinct was just too much. During this time, I’d have to keep the bedroom door shut to keep the cat safe, she could not be let out with any other dogs except for one (an old male mix) that would not be of challenge to her.
One day she attacked and nearly killed the older dog (nearly blind now, couldn’t even squat to pee, would just stand there and want back in immediately). Next was the day that she went through the locked storm door (glass not screen) on the front of the house to attack the neighbor’s dog (a Dachshund) in the presence of the neighbor’s grandchildren (they were playing in the street about 100 feet from my property line). I barely made it to the door in time to call her off. She heard me but it was clear to me, even with all the training we had done, that she was a fraction of a second from breaking the “leave it” command and finishing what she intended. I had a difficult time getting her back in the house, to the point I had to pick her up.
Up until now, she had not nor did she ever become aggressive with a human. But, and this is a BIG BUT, having gone through the locked storm door to go after the dachshund in the presence of the children – had I not been there to see this, call her off or restrain her, I do believe she would have killed the dachshund in front of the children and possibly bit anyone trying to intervene with her intent.
You describe the decision making process very well, I had tried to work with her for nearly 3 years to improve her behavior. So I felt further training was not of help in this situation. Rehoming to another home – not to another home within city limits – the problems we had clearly showed that according to the city/county statutes – she would be determined a dangerous dog. And in another home in the city, should she bite someone or kill another animal – I would be legally liable for damages and fines. Rehoming to “out in the country” wasn’t an option either – with her strong prey drive the farmers ducks, chickens, other small farm animals would be at risk as well. Nor could I keep her since there is no guarantee that she’d not cause further problems with my other animals and/or with my son (or hubby) should they try to intervene in a fight.
So we made the decision to euthanize her. It was not a decision we take lightly, it tears at me every time I think about it. But for liability reasons the decision had to be made. I could not afford to lose insurance or the house we lived in at the time.
I write about this now to point out that this type of decision not only applies to a dog that’s aggressive toward humans, but one that is aggressive toward other animals as well.
Suzanna Bares says
As someone who has had to make that decision, I’ve had to consider all the points made above. My four year old beagle ripped my daughter’s face open, suddenly , terribly. She had given warning signs, but I either thought they would go away or I was in denial. Thankfully my daughter was ” fixed’ and not only does she not have visible scars, but she remained unafraid of dogs. I have six of them now.
I went through all the possibilities mentioned above, made all the calls. Even Best Friends Animal Sanctuary in Utah called me back immediately and told me if they took her , her quality of life would not be what I would have wanted. The risk of re homing her was great and My daughter said she never wanted to see the dog again. The police said she had to leave the premises immediately either with them or we could bring her to our vet. Ten days later she was gone… just a phone call…
It will be 8 years in May… a day I will never forget. It changed my life, my understanding of dogs and that life is not always fair.
For years I’ve asked what I did wrong , where could I have helped her. Your article helps me to see that maybe she really had something wrong ( I took her to all kinds of doctors) , but still , the pain remains… a young life , a loving dog most of the time, a beautiful dog… a tough decision.
Becky says
Having been a child on the other end of the aggressive dog more than once, I have to thank you for this very reasonable approach to the situation. To this day, twenty-odd years from a couple of near attacks, I feel ill at ease around Airedales and Doberman Pincers because of improperly managed dogs.
The terrier was a problem because his family wouldn’t fix the fence and he ran unchecked into our yard without warning. The other was a situation that could have been managed, either by separating Cinnamon when we arrived at my uncle’s house or leashing her to my aunt while we were there. Since it wasn’t managed, the dog had the opportunity to corner me. My uncle finally left my aunt; she continued to not manage Cinnamon until the dog mauled one of her horses, then a neighbor, and the DCO seized her for euthanasia. I felt badly when I heard about it years later, but after such neglect on my aunt’s part, it was probably the safest thing. And now as an adult, I realize how many opportunities to do it right they must have ignored or overlooked for that dog to get to the point of nearly killing a horse. But, when those opportunities are exhausted, it has to be time to think of mercy for an animal that’s suffering as much as their humans are too. A few of the commenters have touched on the safety of neighbors and friends around a reactive dog, which is the part I see many owners not taking into consideration as often as they should. Yes, children need to be taught what a fence means and that they’re not to cross one. Yes, children need to know if the dog lowers his tail, barks, snarls or growls, they should move away slowly and get an adult. But neighborhoods exist, and being constantly on watch is no way for a dog– or a human– to live either.
Kim Hundley says
10 years ago I had an 8 year old Pem Welsh Corgi I loved dearly, and he loved me back. He hated other dogs except for his “sister”, he loved going to the nursing home and little kids. Sometimes he did something I didn’t like; when my young son would hug him, he would show his teeth. I told my son to leave him alone. I was not afraid of him at all and if he showed his teeth to me when I was doing his nails or something he didn’t like, I would just tell him to stop it.
On May 1, 2005, the dog was sleeping on the couch and my husband sat next to him and put his face in Henry’s shoulder to nuzzle him. Henry attacked him violently in the face and almost bit John’s nose off. There was blood and pieces of nose everywhere. John needed many stitches and to this day his nose still isn’t right. It was by far the worse experience of my life. I had to wait 10 days per state law which made it worse because he was his darling self. I’ll never get over walking him into the vet’s, with him “roo rooing” his happy greeting and the staff turning away from him. I’ll never forget the look in his eyes when they gave him the shot. His eyes were afraid and he didn’t understand.
Dennis says
Thank you for this article. It has only been 3 months since I made this difficult decision. I still find myself looking for my beloved Ivan when I take my other two dogs out in the yard, the park, or while walking them on leash around the neighborhood. The scar on my chin doesn’t hurt, but my heartache is killing me. The point you make about how difficult it is to put down a healthy dog that you dearly love, is no understatement. The second guessing keeps me up at night. I will never know if he would have bit someone else, but I was not going to take that chance with such a big, fast, powerful dog. Rest in peace my Ivan.
Stephanie says
Wow, so many heartbreaking stories! I, too had a very reactive puppy. His behavior was fine until he had his rabies vaccine at 3 months. He began with anxiety which resulted in aggression with other dogs. He was fine with large, old dogs. We had a behavioral consultant come and work with us but she said it was nothing that we were doing wrong. I wish it had been. We took him to a vet who was also an Osteopath and she was able to help with his anxiety and reduce some of the rigidity in his body. We did do a number of other things to help him out in his short life. He was a small mini schnauzer so it was easy to scoop him up if we anticipated a problem. We could not walk him on a leash as he couldn’t stand anything touching him. Two experts described him as being like an autistic child with his behaviors. Something else that really helped was Tellington Touch. We learned a lot from our little guy and loved him dearly. Thankful we were able to keep him until he passed at almost 4 years old. He was never aggressive with me until one day just before he died. He snarled and growled. His teeth were crooked and he had no strength to his bite so I knew he couldn’t hurt anyone. He died in my arms 2 minutes after we left the vet clinic. I sympathize with anyone who has to make that really tough decision. Our guy loved his life with us, loved his supper and loved our King sized bed. he loved cuddling with me and climbing the “big” hill. We felt he had quality of life while he was here and he left when it had gone.
Delphy says
Truffles (a lab/beagle mix, think of a stumpy chocolate lab, 58 lbs. dog) and I walk every day here in Northern California (we didn’t have winter this year) my biggest upset is people with small aggressive dogs that lunge at us as we walk by, why is it that these dogs are given a pass to act so aggressively? My dog and I have been attacked by a pair of chihuahuas off leash and the only reason the dogs were not killed by my dog was that I was able to kick them away and scare them. I know that my dog would kill them as she has killed possiums in our backyard before. She is not aggressive unless attacked, so back to my question, what should I say to these people who laugh and let their dogs go to the end of their retractable leashes making me make a turn about or leave a wide distance between myself and their aggressive little dogs?
Melissa Bain says
Thank you so much for this wonderful post, and how timely….I am watching my resident in her case with a 50kg+ Mastiff that has lunged at all of the children in the house (12 years and under), and has only been in the house for 2 weeks. The owners are quite in denial about the severity, while we are quite adamant about the safety of the children in the house. We HATE to discuss euthanasia or rehoming, but (as vets) we are legally obligated to protect public health. One thing that has reverberated with me is when a colleague of ours (RK Anderson) said that “you have to be able to sleep at night” after your case.
Annette says
Three years ago my partner was severely mauled by three pit bulls. They jumped over a fence to attack her as she was going to get the garbage in our front drive. She lives not only with the injuries, the facial scars and the trauma and a newly developed fear of pitbulls and other large dogs but has been unable to work since the event occurred. This has been a nightmare for our whole family. The law forced the three dogs to be put down. In some cases, I do believe that the choice should be taken out of the owner’s hands. That being said, she and I both agree that it is a heartbreaking decision for anyone to have to make. a
Carmen Alcalde says
Thank you Trisha for this piece. We euthanized our lovely (with us), goofy (with us), intense, strong, hard to read, aggressive (to anyone else), sweet (with us), challenging and beautiful GSP, Jack, last May. We worked with him for 4 years, and despite having wonderful resources (including the amazing Chelse Wagner), the benefit of living in a semi rural area with a fenced in acre, the willingness to stop having anyone over to our house, etc., there were still some close calls. After the last very close call (rare to see a neighbor on a walk – but there she was, distraught because her dog had been diagnosed with cancer. She kind of awkwardly lunged in for a hug, Jack not so awkwardly lunged for her throat. There was no contact, but it was just too serious) we made the decision we had been agonizing over for a very long time.
I don’t have so much of feelings of guilt, just more profound sadness that this amazing dog was not able to live the life he deserved. It is a tragedy that this was the outcome, that he lived in such a state of heightened fear and anxiety, and that we couldn’t “fix” him and make it all better…
He taught us so very much. We don’t regret adopting him, or having him for those years, but frankly I hope the lessons we learned will never need to be applied to another dog that we have.
Jenny says
I owned a pit-mix that turned to a few different types aggression as she aged. She was a “patient” of yours. I was so relieved to hear that it was nothing that we had done but her age and tempermant. We managed her for 15 years and quite safetly but not without considerable drawbacks. We were no longer viable members of the canine world. We could not go to doggy training because of her food aggression issues. We couldn’t go camping with her due to her extreme fear of children and many other things. We loved her dearly but she made our lives considerably more complicated. It wasn’t the fun carefree doggy life I had been wanting.
We had to put her down about 5 years ago due to health issues. To be honest, she was soooo much work and maintenance, it has put me off of getting another dog. I do NOT want to deal with those issues again. It really sucked part of my soul out of me.
We loved her dearly and miss her but it is an overwhelming burden to safetly manage a dog with those types of issues.
beverly fuller says
Two years ago I pulled an American Bulldog from an animal control who was approximately 2 years old. He had been abused and was fur and bones. After the two week “honeymoon” phase he was a different dog. He loved my husband and I unconditionally as well as our other dogs and cats. We worked with two trainers and he was very smart as far as commands and tricks. He hated everyone except us. His problem was fear biting and he had a total of six people that he bit one being my adult daughter. He would be happily walking around and then it was as if he blanked out and would bite quickly and have a blank stare for 30 seconds or so after and then have his big smile back on his face. I consulted with two bahavioralist who believe that his brain was not wired right (probably due to abuse/beating in head area). We had him under quarantine for 10 days due to the last person needing a tetanus shot so health department was notified. None of the other bites required medical attention. We cried for 10 days straight trying to make a decision. In the end we decided that for others safety, since we did not know when it would happen, it was best for him not to be put in a situation he could not control. This was the hardest decision I have ever had to make and the tears were there every day for months. He is in a better place, running free and being the best dog ever.
lori says
I had a very mean Germen Shepherd .He was the love of my life.He bite a few people. I was lucky it wasn’t to bad but still bad .No stitches.He was with me though the hardest times of my life losing a father , brother , my divorce .So he was my only family to me besides my kids. He bite do to a few tease him.It did make my life stressful only when I was working , I kenneled him inside a garage.He listen well to me and only me.I could walk him I muzzled him to walk just because othe people dogs no being under control. In the end he did bite me bad his hips went out and ge laid in the yard I was trying to helo him up.I had to have put to sleep then because he would not let me help him walk .It made it even worst because I had to wait 10 days to have him put to sleep cause of him biting me .He suffered rheb he seen to be better the vet did talk me into it. I GOT so sick with my kidney disease after I had him put to sleep .I ended up 3 kidney surgeries and sepsis .I spent a year in bed after the deadly blood infection. That was from 2011 till 2013 .I got my female GSD in 2013 and I just got my male too.I am socializing my to with classes my female was not socialize cause I got sick last winter I live alone and not many people come to to visit. I have faith in her and myself the classes will work and then I want to train both to be therapy dogs to help people with PTSD witch I over came with help from God and my dogs .Thank you for your story I am lucky my Tanner never hurt any one to bad or killed anyone .If his attacts came out of no where I would have put him to sleep sooner .I now have a big fenced yard where mine can run and play and with classes and socializing I hope my girl will over come her fear of people.
Terrie says
One of things I will feel guilty about until the day I die is making a call that I knew would end up with an aggressive dog being PTS. My elderly neighbor had a chihuahua mix with rather severe fear aggression. Due to her age, she could no longer walk the dog and would often tie him out on a line long enough that he could attack me as I came and went. The only thing he ever sank teeth into was my shoe, but he put on a very aggressive display at myself and my dog, working my dog up into a frenzy. As she got older, the dog began to get loose. He would attack my car, forcing me to honk my horn until his owner came to get him. I pleaded with her to make sure he would not get loose, but nothing changed.
The final straw was the morning I opened the door to take my dog out for his morning walk, and her dog was waiting to charge into my home, coming after me and my dog. I called animal control, knowing that she could not afford to comply with their requirements. The next time I saw her, she sadly told me that they had taken her dog. With his aggressive behavior and the overburdened system, he was almost certainly PTS. I never told my neighbor that I was the one who called, and I still remember her mournful “They took my dog.” But I also know that I did the right thing. Things had reached the point where my dog and I had to be cautious coming and going from our own home, and what if I’d been a mother with a small child, not a single woman with a large dog? (And yes, the 60 lb mutt was afraid of the 10 lb chihuahua mix, who was just that aggressive). If a child had been bitten and I hadn’t made that call, I would feel even more guilty than I do now.
Lacey says
As a foster, I’ve had to take three dogs to euthanasia for behavioral issues. The first was the saddest to me: a terrier who lived with me and my dogs for two months with very little progress in accepting me, let alone other people. He was an extreme management problem and might never have reached the point of going out in public. I did avoid bites, and I reached the point where, while hand feeding him, I could touch his shoulder with my other hand, but that was all. The rescue group paid for a T Touch consultation, but the consultant recommended stroking his tail, which I knew couldn’t be safely done. His great virtue was that he was good with other dogs – tolerated my quiet, mildly timid male, and played beautifully with my anxious, lively female.
The next was one who, with any excitement (positive or negative) tried to bite anything she could. If she couldn’t reach anything else she would bite her own leg. I took her for an evaluation with the wisest shelter worker I knew, and she agreed with me that it appeared something neurological was wrong.
The third started as a classic shy dog case, but as time went on and he got over the worst shyness, he became obnoxious instead. Neither my dogs nor I could stand him after awhile, and he was trying to push us all around and making many threats to bite. These would probably just have been level 2 bites, but I couldn’t expect to place him for that.
Incidentally, all three had thorough vet checkups without evident physical issues.
Valrie Verhoeven Hefty says
I so empathize with you. My own beloved Riley dies in my arms a miniature French Poodle of only 4 years. I wished I had euthanized him…no danger just pain for he and I too. The death rail and urine flow after consume me to this day that was May 2009, it seems like yesterday.
My daughter works at Banfield Hospital in Waco TX…Trust me through her experiences too I know how difficult her job as well as yours is…she and I get too emotionally attached… the hardest thing to do is put down a pet you are attached to or is your patient regardless of the reason We try to take comfort in knowing they crossed the Rainbow Bridge and live on in our memories. Bless you for what you do. I have not posted on my blog much…my husband recently died unexpectedly…am still grieving… God Bless you for your compassionate care and advice!
Sheri Cassens says
Dr. McConnell, you helped me with this decision about 25 years ago when my children were small. Thank you. The potential was there for this dog to seriously hurt my children. Our dog was friendly 90% of the time. I wondered how I could live with myself if one of my young children had their face disfigured by a dog I knew had developed serious aggression problems. I didn’t realize how stressful living with this dog had become until the euthanasia was over and a huge weight was lifted off our shoulders.
Accidents can happen right in front of our parental eyes. About two years later, we had a different dog who loved children, sought them out. He was sleeping on the floor with his back to the couch and my 3 yr. old daughter was quietly sitting on the couch with a small toy. I was two feet away picking up toys when my daughter toppled over right on top of the dog. It was a moment when time moves into slow motion as I saw, my daughter falling knowing that I would not reach her in time to prevent her from landing on the sleeping dog. I also knew how dangerous a child falling on even the best natured dog could be. Our lovely new dog just got up and moved to a new location. I was so thankful we made the decision to euthanize the dangerous dog.
Carolyn O'Connor says
Thank you. I euthanized a dog-aggressive pet in November and it was heart-wrenching. After years of research and training, he badly damaged our other dog. To find a new home would have been like finding a needle in a haystack and I would never have been able to stop worrying about what may happen…to another dog or to my dog. I choose to believe that he is in a happier place now.
Fran says
I am so glad I read your article. I had the horrible task of informing my daughter who was deployed to Iraq that her baby, her snuggle bunny, a Pitty named Jesse was attacking the other dogs I owned and I would have to euthanize her. Jesse was a wonderful dog, funny, playful and loving ,,,until she wasn’t. In the 8 months she lived with us, she had caused over $5000 in vet bills to sew up the other dogs. she would be playing nicely and then attack. No bark, no growl, no warning. The first bite was to a sleeping dog laying under the table. My daughter sat in a chair that put Lexi between Jesse and her Mom. I immediately took Lexi to my vet and he wasn’t concerned even when I said it was a pit bull bite. He wanted to go home and didn’t want a late case to hold up dinner. It was two weeks before I could get her in else where. Lexi had a dislocated shoulder and 3 breaks in her wrist and paw. $1500 of surgery and 3 pins couldn’t put Lexi back together again. She was permanently disabled. Another story about the vet. Jesse also got sprayed by a skunk and then attacked and killed it. the final straw was when she attacked another dog in the dark and tried to kill her. I got her off and kenneled and Glory to the emergency vet. She had 18 bite wounds and a gaping wound on her chest. When I had to tell Joy about Jesse, it was sad. Joy was half way around the world and couldn’t do anything even say goodbye. Then she got to thinking, If she owned a dog that Jesse had attacked and then learned of Jesse’s history she would want to know why Jesse was still alive. Another vet came to the house after I explained what was going on and since he had sewn up and treated several of the bites he put her down. We put her in my car, I gave her a big greenie and she happily chewed away to sleep. Jesse was cremated and we still talk of her good days and she is missed. Could I have rehomed her? Possibly but not without putting others in danger. Jesse exhibited no triggers. There wasn’t a point when you can say this is what sets her off. She would play with the other dogs one minute then attack in the next breath.
Anissa says
Thank you for this article, and thanks to all the commenters sharing their stories. Seems there are more of us that we thought…
When we got my GSD, Casper, he was 6 months old, 67 lbs, 25 inches at the shoulder, and had spent the last 4 months on a 15 ft chain attached to a fence. No training, no socialization, nada. He was supposedly out of a litter bred for police work, so we’re looking at high drive bloodlines, and he’d supposedly failed a temperament test at 2 months old for being unpredictable, which was why he was sold as a pet to one of the cops. And then after 4 months on the chain, he grabbed at the cop’s kid when the kid was feeding him. Skin wasn’t broken, it was more mouthing than biting, but they put up a free to good home sign. Luckily they lived across from us, and my dad got him, knowing how much I love the breed.
The very first day, he and I were goofing around in the yard, and I was excited by how closely he stuck to my side. Being 17, I was thinking “Oh he loves me! This is meant to be!” Yeah, then he bit my thigh. Looking back, he was just chasing a moving object, and his prey drive got activated, so he bit. We had a ‘come to Jesus’ moment wherein I picked him up off the ground by his scruff, looked into his eyes, and told him that I would defend him to hell and back because he was my dog, but the next time he bit me he was going to the vet to be euthanized.
(I was 17, remember. I had read a couple library books from the 60s about GSDs and I think the Monks of New Skete. I have since learned more techniques for dealing with aggressive behavior.)
It worked, though. Casper became my loving companion, and never once offered aggression to me or my family. Anyone he knew well before he turned 2 years old was family, to him, and he was the sweetest goofball of a German Shedder you could want. Anyone else … yeah. The ‘unpredictability’ showed up in that the poor dog was basically caught between a powerful instinctive drive to protect his family and his territory, and a crippling fear of all new people and new situations. He also became very aggressive toward strange dogs.
He had one bite – in which someone we knew approached the other two dogs and touched them without speaking to us, and said person got nipped in the shoulder by Casper. It broke the skin a little, but by then we were talking about a 95 lb dog that was 27 inches at the shoulder. If he had wanted to maul the guy, he could’ve done a LOT more. After that, we did private in-home training and kept working with him to desensitize him to scary situations. I also managed him very, very closely. I never let him loose around other people, always warned visitors to our home that he was fear-aggressive and would bite, and put him in his crate if we did have guests. When we went on walks, I was constantly scanning the area around us and did not let any person or dog approach him close enough for him to feel threatened. When we went to the vet or the groomer, I always warned them and let them vet know that I would restrain him if necessary. For all that, they usually told me he was one of their better clients!
Casper never bit again, and lived a happy life with us. He found one dog who didn’t take his B.S. – our Vixen, who though half his size put him in his place with one look, and immediately became the benevolent despot of our pack. We joked that they were married – when he died, of complications from hip dysplasia, she became so depressed that she wouldn’t eat or drink. It took getting her a puppy to lift her spirits again.
I am glad that I was able to keep Casper alive and safe despite his issues. But I know if it had been only a little bit worse, if he’d been aggressive toward us or if we’d had kids or if we had people over more often, I might’ve had to make that awful decision. My heart goes out to all of you who have had to face this problem.
Julie says
This is a decision that I had to make several years ago and euthanized my poor sweet boy because despite everything we had tried, keeping the world safe from him and vice versa while allowing him to do the things he valued just wasn’t possible any more.
You have done a wonderful job of covering the pain and the issues, especially the quality of life and safety to others if the dog was rehomed.
Makayla says
I absolutely love this post! I was faced with that extremely hard decision with my beautiful Chow-Retriever. She was wonderful and loving to people, and the dogs in our house, but outside dogs were at risk if she ran out the door. This all started after we moved from a house with a big yard, to a townhouse. After a year of denial and keeping her away from other dogs besides the ones we lived with, I realized it was time. Luckily my mom worked with a man who has been raising chows for over 20 years, so he offered to take her and give her the proper training and see if she could live a quality life. Now she lives with him and his other chows on 2 acres with only an electric fence to keep her in. The neighbor dogs come over and he said she has not been aggressive once, and it’s been two years. As much as I miss her, I know I did the right thing and that she is living a wonderful life.
Allison Getty says
Thank you so much for posting this.
It will be a year on March 9th since I had to make the hardest and most painful decision of my life, to put my 4 year old dog down for aggression. I socialized Levi, took him to puppy class, basic obedience, and he passed the Canine Good Citizen Class. I read “Culture Clash” “The Other End of the Leash” “For the Love of a Dog” etc etc but Levi started to become very fearful and bit two people. I worked for 2 years with a trainer and Veterinary Behaviorist and tried everything but unfortunately there was no progress. I know I made the right decision for Levi and for myself but the guilt remains and I’m still working on that. What could I have done differently? What could I have done better? I still think about Levi everyday and miss him terribly. My best memories are how much joy that tennis ball brought to his life and those are the memories I keep close to my heart.
Luann Cox says
thank you for writing about such a difficult & emotionally devastating problem. I had to euthanize my beautiful Kelpie, Allie, at only 6 years old. I loved her so much and it was and still is one of the most difficult decisions I’ve ever made. This was 15 years ago and I still feel guilty even though I know logically it was the only decision possible for everyone’s safety. I couldn’t re home her since she only trusted a very few people, she wasn’t safe with kids or other animals and she was getting worse. I never was able to figure out what her triggers were. I wonder sometimes if she was mentally ill, Allie was so amazing in so many ways. Probably the smartest, most loving (to me) dog I’ve ever known.
Thank you again for addressing this difficult issue.
Kerry M. says
Thanks to everyone who shared their stories. I read everyone of them. I’m a trainer who doesn’t specialize in aggressions issues yet, so I have referred out the cases beyond me. Two have been euthanized and they make me sad to this day even though I’ve only known them through group classes. I appreciate the perspectives of the family and how managing can impact the quality of life for everyone, not just for the dog.
Annie says
First of all reading articles like this make me incredibly grateful that “my” breed weighs 2-6 lbs. While I am always trying to tell people a bite is a bite and a small dog can do damage, it is just a different story when you are thinking about these things with a 2 lb dog VS even a 15 lb dog. The risk is just so different.
I took in a rescue that was totally feral- after many several of fostering and training dogs. When we took her we knew it could go a few ways, with a dog as scared as she was we were prepared to uncover a dog that was either too aggressive to work with or too scared to work with. As it turns out she is amazingly not even a tad aggressive (or as I tell people, her go to is always run then give up- she just is not wired to turn to biting), but we were lucky. I do have to say we were very careful in the beginning, scared dogs scare me more than anything else. Honestly had she been a bigger dog she would have probably been euthanized- because we all know scared can turn dangerous quickly. I often look at her and think “you are so lucky you weigh 5 lbs.” Even with no bite history managing her fear for her own good got stressful in the beginning. After having her I am so incredibly sympathetic for people who have to make a decision to end a dogs life- for either a persons safety- or because living in total fear can be as cruel as living in pain.
Patricia says
Thank you for this excellent article. We had to make this decision two years ago. Our rescue Eskie was a loving, sweet dog, but when she turned 5, she started attacking two of the other dogs in the house. We tried managing the behavior, but it was almost completely unpredictable. Sometimes it was the others barking that set her off, and sometimes it was nothing at all. Then one morning she attacked and killed our tiny Chihuahua, who had always been her best friend. I was there for every attack, including the last one, and the stress each time it happened was horrible. I felt completely helpless to do anything about it. And the dog always looked so confused after the fact, and would try to “make up” with the dog she attacked. After the last attack, we discussed it with our vet and all of our friends in rescue, and sadly, everyone agreed. Rehoming was out of the question – no rescue could risk taking her, not only because of the conscience issue, but also because of liability. We thought long and hard about this choice, but ultimately had to act for the safety of our other pets. Soul-scorching is a good description of this decision. I have to believe something just went wrong in her head to make her so aggressive so suddenly and so unpredictably. I have always wondered, if I had rehomed her when this first started, got her into a different environment, away from the dogs she attacked, if she – and my Chi – would still be alive. Your article has made me start to believe that rehoming really wasn’t an option at any time during this ordeal. She might have just taken her issues elsewhere and given someone else the terrible decision we had to make.
Maureen Poole says
I have recently had a 17 month old dachshund returned to me, her breeder. she had bitten a visitor to the house, after being cornered, and was now sitting under the kitchen table snarling and rushing at people who entered the kitchen. the vet had been sent for to put her down….but I had bred this girl and knowing both parents knew she couldn’t be a bad girl.
She arrived in a cage, so traumatised you couldn’t touch her or put your hand anywhere near her without being bitten. After a few days we realised she was a “guarder”…a piece of paper, and empty crisp packet, and I had to use a walking stick to push her away from things before I could pick her up.
I spoke to her previous owners, and yes, they’d had the same problem. She growled when you tried to move her off the settee, so they’d turned up the cushions so that she couldn’t get on there, then she’d garded her bed….so they took it away from her so she had nowhere to go. In short, everything she loved and treasured had been stolen from her. On the day in question she’d found a piece of blanket, dragged it under the table and wouldn’t let any one near it.
Over the next few months we taught Sally that we could take things from her and move them to another place, but she would not lose them, they would still be hers. It has taken a long time, but she is no longer aggressive with anyone. she still screams and wets herself when being groomed. I believe the problem was caused by the owners theemselves, and I believe she may have been beaten.
On Sunday she moved to my daughters house, and has settled in really well. She is the most wonderful, loving little dog you could wish to meet, and I’m so glad we had her back, but, realistically, if she’d been alarge dog I think the outcome may have been very different.
Lisa says
Thank you for this thoughtful post as well as the replies. I will be saving this one to refer others to. It is a very difficult decision.
I only once had to deal with a dog who was aggressive to people, and luckily, he ended up being severely hypothyroid–once he was treated, he never showed aggression to a person again. I was lucky, though, that I researched aggression in the breed (GSD) and found this out and was able to get help for him.
However, I have had to deal with another difficult issue: dealing with a dog that was very dog aggressive, and I faced the same sort of agonizing choices. I was not very dog savvy in those days, and have learned a lot on my journey. My dog, Bel, was a Shiba Inu from a puppy mill. She was not socialized as a pup before I got her, and I didn’t know, then, how critical it was to make up for that. I got her at 16 weeks. She was extremely fearful of people all her life, and aggressive with other dogs. She particularly hated my other Shiba, and when she was two and he was three, she nearly killed him, after several escalating fights. He spent 6 weeks at the vet, and I decided to rehome her, but really, who wants a dog that is so fearful of people, and terribly reactive to other dogs? My vet asked me if I wanted to euthanize Bel after she tried to kill my other Shiba, but at the time, I thought I was going to lose him, and couldn’t bear the thought of losing both of them. (My vet offered it but didn’t push, and many years later she admitted that she had a “Bel” of her own–one of her dogs had actually killed one of her other dogs, and she managed the dog by keeping her separate from the others, much in the way I handled Bel).
In the end, I had to keep the dogs separated for the rest of her life. She was an unhealthy dog in general, and died at 8 years old. I tried everything with her: a good behavioralist who wasn’t able to make much progress. We tried medication, but she reacted badly to everything we tried. In the end, nothing worked but keeping her separated from other dogs, but it was very stressful, because any management error–and in six years, of course there are going to be some–meant she immediately attacked the other dog again. He lived in stress, as did everyone else in our household, and we didn’t even realize how much stress til she died and everyone was able to relax.
Of course, this is different than a dog that is aggressive to humans, but I did learn a lot from my experience, and what I learned is that management like this is extremely difficult, and I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone. I gave Bel a good life, but I wonder sometimes if it was fair to my other dogs. Now, I realize the thing to do probably would have been to rehome my more stable Shiba, because I would have been able to find a home for him. He might have had six happier, less stressful years if I had done that. I couldn’t give him up, though, and I can say, at 11, he is a happy elder, and though he was also a reactive dog, in his older age, with less stress and more work, he is becoming less reactive and now even has a few dog friends.
Should I have euthanized Bel after she nearly kill my other dog? Probably. She only got worse as she got older. But at the time, I couldn’t do it. But knowing what I know now, I don’t think I could go through it all again, and so I have to say that yes, there are times when euthanizing a dog for behavioral problems may indeed be the right thing to do, and certainly, living with a dog with aggression issues is very very hard, and not something I would encourage anyone to do without a great deal of thought. People have praised me for giving Bel a good life, and I know I did, but it was at a great deal of cost to all of us, and I don’t think I could do it again.
Barb says
Thank you for an excellent article on one of the toughest aspects of dog ownership I’ve ever encountered. I’ve had dogs all my 60+ years, my husband and I took in a dog that we learned was fear aggressive but manageable and a great dog for his 13 years with us, yet sadly, I ended up euthanizing our first Aussie for rage type aggression.
We raised him from a pup, he was a PERFECT dog 99% of the time . . . but something would trigger sudden aggression, usually toward me, bites, blood, it only took seconds and then he was back to being the perfect Aussie. I had several incidents, in one he jumped up and left marks on my shoulder through a heavy polartec shirt and coat, our vet continued to say one of us was going to get hurt, but we continued to work with him. The vet had done blood tests for thyroid problems, etc. and found nothing amiss. I started carrying the citronella Dog Stop spray, thankfully there were no children to worry about and our vet thought that he wouldn’t attack our other dogs. Then one day I came home from the grocery store to find my husband’s arm and long sleeve shirt shredded and bloody. He was out in our large fenced yard with the 3 dogs, when all of a sudden our Aussie ran back to him and started attacking his arm. It was the day before my birthday but I sent my precious boy to be free of his inner demons, he was only 2 🙁
As a committed owner, now retired with the time and resources to work with behaviorists throughout the country, it is one of my life’s do-over moments, but I wonder if the result would have been any different. At least he didn’t injure others or suffer at the hands of someone trying to “train” him.
Ellen says
Thank you for your unbiased article. I remember the one written by Phyllis D. to which you refer. It was published on a pet sitter’s blog from MN. People were writing in who were still debating whether to put their dog down. I commented with names of trainers who could possibly help them and their dogs, but because the blogger (and several on the thread) thought that they were “aversive” and horrible, cruel people, they deleted my comment and blocked me from commenting further. It was heart wrenching to read anything else in that blog by people I could no longer reach out to and the blogger wouldn’t respond to my e-mails. I actually cried out of frustration and heartache.
For anyone who thinks that putting a dog down before exhausting all avenues of rehabilitation after medical has been ruled out, because of a disagreement of training method or ego, I find you to be the most inhumane of all. Not giving a dog a chance at becoming balanced and living a happy life is what happens on a daily basis across this country and is unacceptable.
For those on this thread still contemplating whether euthanasia is the answer, first consider whether it really is to end the suffering of an irredeemable dog or the only resolution you’ve been led to believe by a veterinary behaviorist and possibly a trainer who only works with rewards and no corrections, otherwise known as Purely Positive. You still have a choice of contacting people who work with aggressive dogs every day and have very successful records. If you can afford them and their board and train programs, and willing to commit and work with your dog, there are many out there who will evaluate your dog (and you and your environment) and give you the truth about the situation.
Depending on where you live, there are many excellent behaviorist/trainers saving dogs every day with severe dog and human aggression. Please message me on Facebook if you are interested in these trainers as I do not think I’m allowed to mention them here. Or, you can check the IACP website @ canineprofessionals DOT com. You can access all of the individuals on their websites and YouTube channels to see for yourself whether you think it’s worth your dog’s life to contact them for help.
I hope this comment is allowed and saves the lives of some of the dogs right here and now on this thread, whose lives are hanging by a thread. Thank you.
Karen says
my heart goes out to anyone having to make this very difficult decision. We managed an aggressive dog for 8 years, finally having to put him down just shy of his 10th birthday. He was a great dog, with a screw loose somewhere that unfortunately manifested itself in biting kids under the age of 12 …. And we had two kids that age in the house at the time. We miss him terribly, but know now that euthanizing him was the right thing to do. We never realized how much the management of the aggression had taken over our household, to the point that our kids couldn’t have friends over, etc. great article, and hugs to all who are currently in this situation!
Anne M Hier says
The only people who think euthanasia is not a first-choice option with a dog that is overtly aggressive are people who have never been attacked by a dog. Whether the reasons are heredity or environment is of little relevance once the dog has physically harmed a human being. The average owner has difficulty with training and consistently enforcing the basic obedience commands. They are not capable of continuously monitoring a dangerous dog. Even if the dog is sent to a professional trainer who has real experience dealing with aggressive dogs, the dog will never be 100% trustworthy in all situations – especially if it is in the hands of amateur owners who have little or no dog training experience. In other words, these dogs are walking time-bombs. The idea that any dog that has bitten a human being should be “rehomed” is outrageous. In our tort-centric society, I can guarantee you will be sued if you do so and the dog does further damage. Plus, too many shelters willfully place dogs with highly questionable temperaments just to clear kennel space. I find it totally unacceptable when I see ads that state the dog can’t go to a home with children, other dogs, or cats. While it is true that certain breeds are probably not suitable in a home with small children, too often that is not the reason for the above conditional statement. Children are pretty common place in our society. Sooner or later the average pet owner will lapse, putting their fellow human beings at risk. Unfortunately, too many people think dogs are just “kids in fur coats,” and erroneously presume that they will “understand” and respond with the same brain power as a human being. They are dogs. All dogs have the capability to bite. The human-canine bond has one main rule – don’t bite the hand that feeds you.
CJ says
I respect your opinions and mostly agree. I was saddened however that you never made mention of an animal sanctuary .There are many good caring places where dogs can live out the rest of their lives. If they are people aggressive and not dog aggressive they will be let out to play in field with other dogs they run and frolic and even play in the snow. If they are aggressive to other dogs they get individual time outdoors by themselves. They can adjust to a new and different lifestyle. But they still have LIFE. Folks pay 4 5 6 7 thousand dollars on medical to prolong their dogs life. They will also have to pay for the upkeep at a sanctuary and it usually isn’t cheap. But there are other options to a family loved pet
Felicia Patterson says
Nicely written
Trisha says
To say that I am touched by all the stories here is an understatement. I’ll just leave it that I am overwhelmed with gratitude for those of you who have written in, telling your stories, helping others through these stormy waters. Thank you all especially for your kind and compassionate tone; so important when facing such difficult issues. (There are a few comments that I have chosen not to post, but very few, given how great the reach of this post.)
I can’t manage to answer every comment, but know that I have read them all. I did want to thank Pat Miller for her excellent comment that we must ask not just about the quality of life of the dog, but also of the owners. I know she asks this because, as someone who works with serious cases on a daily basis, she sees people who are suffering terribly because of their dog’s behavior. That is abundantly clear when reading the stories people have sent in. I did have a few comments on Facebook in which I was taken to task for suggesting that one could EVER be justified in putting a dog down. (“I am so disappointed in you!” someone said.) How I wish there was a magic wand out there that could save every dog… don’t we all.
I am slammed with other work right now, but soon I’ll write another piece about where to find help when you are suffering from the guilt of having to put a dog down for any behavioral reason. “Take care of yourself” will be the bottom line. Meanwhile, thanks again to all the people who have taken (and continue to take) the time to address this issue.
Peri says
Hi Patricia, My co-breeder and I had a conversation about your blog yesterday. It is such a difficult thing to deal with that it is no surprise the number of responses this post has generated. I did rescue work in the early to mid80’s with dogs who had previously bitten a human. Like a few of the above posts, about half were dogs that had not been trained in basic behavior and/or were in a tumultuous home where the dog was the least crazy entity. Those I found fairly easy to give some basic manners training and rehome into loving, but thoughtful homes. The other half, I ended up PTS. I never really thought about it in such a structured way, but the post from Diane R amounts to an articulation of my idea of the “perfect” rules. I have seen way too many times when something went wrong and dogs who were “being managed” wound up in a situation where a human or another animal was seriously hurt. I think when that happens, then we have not only failed the aggressive dog, but more importantly we have failed our fellow humans and normal canine pack members. No one is perfect, but from my perspective, I will go to great lengths to “save” a “good” dog with a medical problem. I have much more limited tolerance for those that threaten serious injury to humans and other dogs. I wish more people would read and follow Diane R’s rules. The rest of us would be much safer.
Diane R says March 3, 2015 at 10:52 am as a long time trainer and Rottweiler breeder/owner I have several absolutes
1) dogs that bite-or who would if given the chance, are NEVER ever to be re-homed. EVER. Either the owner keeps the dog or a trainer who has been working with the dog takes it in. otherwise the dog is PTS no exceptions
2) if you can and are willing to micro manage this dog’s every breath every day and NEVER allow it near anyone outside of the family with no exceptions. Then keep the dog and work with it
3)IF the dog is a danger to it’s own family members it is PTS again no exceptions
4) IF you have children and the dog is a risk to them the dog is PTS even if you feel you can micromanage the dog. Accidents happen and your children will pay the price
5) if the dog is not human aggressive but is instead dangerously animal aggressive, can you again micro manage the dogs every breath and make sure it never so much as sees another animal? If you want to have other animals in your home and do not have any children can you keep them 2000% separated by totally secure means? If you can’t do this the dog has to be PTS My rules may sound harsh but I have worked with humans and their dogs almost 30 years and did rescue 10+ and also managed a large boarding kennel. I’ve seen what happens when you do not follow these rules with these dogs and it is always a tragedy for all involved –
Karyn says
Several years ago I took on a German Wirehaired Pointer bitch that had an issue when overstimulated she’d run in and take bite shots at anyone handy. She was a beautiful, smart, sweet, insanely prey driven girl. I worked and worked and got her redirected with her need to grab and bite at things when over stimulated and got her grabbing at a specific toy that was always at the ready.
She also had issues with fear based biting when she had too much pressure in her life so she had two total different triggers for biting. In my home we could eliminate the stress/fear issues so could manage that behavior so the breeder and I discussed a management plan and what potential for rehoming this lovely girl might have.
The breeder decided it was not responsible to rehome her with a bite history. She was excellent at management of the environment and giving the dog the tools need for her to redirect her need to over the top bite and grab when in prey mode.
This worked beautifully for 2 yrs. Then the breeder had a new kennel help person and there was a hiccup in management steps and the dog bit the help in the face and reulsted in 15 stitches… The breeder called me in tears because she made a very hard decision to put an otherwise smart, talented, beautiful 4 yr old bitch down. I cried with her… but it was the right choice.
When someone has tested for health issues , has done all the right things and has had a failure in being able to safely manage the dog for everyone’s safety it becomes time to humanely end the dogs life.
Some dogs, no matter how hard a person tries, just can’t be a safe enough citizen of life.
Laura Fletcher says
This is such a hard thing to do. I know – I had to do it. My german shepherd was always very protective of me but unfortunately he turned on my husband. There were signs over the years but we let them go as they didn’t seem overwhelming. The final straw came – he was 9 (I’d raised him from a puppy of 7 weeks old). This broke my heart and I refuse to get another animal because physically there was nothing wrong. I felt like I had betrayed him and the guilt still rips me apart. I know it had to be done as he would have never survived another household. My prayers to all who have had to go through this. I did the best thing for my best friend, my baby.
Trisha says
Thank you CJ for adding in the sanctuary option. It is indeed an option for people to consider. I suspect that the reason I didn’t think to include it was that my clients had so little luck finding a place that would take their dog in which the dog would still have a good life. I am sure there are some wonderful sanctuaries out there… Best Friends, of course, comes to mind, so thank you for adding to the conversation.
Jana says
I am not surprised at the huge number of posts on this topic as it’s more and more prevalent and very painful. I glanced at the scars on my hand and face from my family’s pet when I was a child. Right or wrong, my mom bred Bosten Terriers and one male was raised with 5 very young children with inadequate supervision. all of us were bitten by him and my mom’s perspective was that he wouldn’t bite if we didn’t tease and bother him.
I also kept my 1st mastiff, although I had him thoroughly evaluatated by a police K9 dog trainer and excellent behaviorist at 1.5 yrs of age due to aggression. Both of their opinions were that he wasn’t aggressive so much as intensely dominate. He had to set all the rules with people and other dogs and didn’t hesitate to growl in a serious manner to any infractions. He hated to be touched except on his terms. Through intensive training, he became a very reliable, happy male, who I, or his trusted vet, could do anything to, but even then, if he felt we were pushing his boundries, we’d still get a warning growl that never went any further.
Fortunately, he adored children, puppies, and cats who could do anything to him with impunity.
I was dogsitting a friends doberman & dalmation at my house who didn’t always get along with each other. My mastiff tolerated them quite well. One day, we were all outside when a visitor came to the yard gate to see me. The dobe and dal rushed the gate barking and got into a nasty fight with each other, severely biting me in the process. Once everything settled down, they separated and my mastiff walked over to the dobe and soundly thrashed the dobe, BUT with no blood or brusing. After an initial slight resistence, he cowered and yielded. The dal ran to hide in a corner and when my mastiff turned to him, he bellied up, but still was “thrashed”. The mastiff’s “thrashing” display was mainly show although deadly serious as there was absolutely no damage, but neither dog ever gave a bit of further problems at my house, even to each other. My mastiff would just look at them and get immediate compliance. Unfortuately, one day back at my friends house, they got into another nasty fight with each other, resulting in damage that almost involved her kids. I supported her in making the difficult decision to put the dobe down for the family and other dog’s safety.
In my many years with mastiff rescue, several of the foster dogs were euthanized for aggression. In each of those cases, the heartwrenching decision was for safety, and liability.
Mindy says
What a good article. And it’s true, until you are in that situation you really don’t know how hard that decision could be. I owned what most would call an aggressive dog. I had him for 16 years. He was wonderful with my kids and neighbor kids but did not tolerate being teased. If you provoked him, grab his color while you yell at him, chase him up and down the fence then stick your hand thru – he would bite you. One little girl came in our yard and got bit. I asked why and she said she was trying to tie his mouth shut. Although there was always a reason he bit, he never bit my own children or people he knew.
He spent two occasions in quarantine for biting, even though we had proof of rabies. Several occasions it was suggested we put him down and I could never do it. I made the excuse it wasn’t his fault. But in the end it was his fault. He knew that biting got results. I spent his lifetime trying to protect him. It was an experience I wouldn’t change, but I hope I’m never in that situation again.
Rhonda says
Wow, I am sitting here crying my eyes out because I have a 10 yr old Rottie, been with me since the beginning, who has ‘escaped’ being PTS many times – because I am selfish and lonely. I see his playfulness when he goes to find his ball, I see his discipline when we are on walks and he is beside or behind with a slack leash and I see his intelligence – he understands so much more than I do. He acts like a three year old around other animals, curious, playful, tolerant and gentle.
He grabs peoples hands, it seems very random, usually doesn’t break the skin, just grabs and lets go – acts like nothing has happened. The time he bit me, I was going all ‘Ceasar’ on him and ignored every opportunity that he gave me to stop. If there was no quarantine time period, that would have been the end of him. That was 7 yrs ago. I say to myself that if he wanted to hurt people he could but I know that is a story I tell myself. It has been exhausting always being 3 steps ahead, on guard, thinking maybe I will see the signs in time.
I can’t tell you how much this article has helped me, along with all the comments. So many brave, loving and giving people!
Martha Ruskai says
Thank you for writing this thoughtful blog.
I had to make such a call almost immediately after taking over a breed specific rescue at the regional level.
I had not heard of “Rage Syndrome” prior to meeting this dog, who at initial consult
displayed no abnormal behaviors. But once in my care sudden inexplicable explosions of what I can only describe as “Kujo – like behavior” of the terrifying kind began.
Eventually despite weeks of heeling well on leashed walks, tennis ball fetch and other acting perfectly normal except for these 2 outbursts, I was badly bitten, thankfully on the hand and arm, and not the face. State law requires 2 week rabies quarantine. My vet took the dog for that and he immediately tried to attack two vet techs.
Long story short, at the end of the two weeks since no appropriate home had been found I made the call to euthanize. There are still people who do not speak to me 15 years later because I made that call. But I could not turn that dog over to anyone other than someone with advanced behavior reading / training skills who also had the ability to keep the dog in a safe location.
I would make the same call again. But I will always wonder what I wasn’t told when the dog was surrendered. Perhaps with more information a different scenario could have played out with a different outcome. I know that I would NOT have allowed the automatic rabies booster to a dog for whom I had complete veterinary records.
Thank you again. I wish noone ever has to make that call again. But it is important to know when & how to evaluate & have the strength to keep both the dog and everyone else safe.
HFR says
I also think it may be worth it to mention that having a dog that is a danger to anyone is also a detriment to dog owners at large and for our standing in society. Every time a dog misbehaves in public, my first thought is that this does not reflect well on all dog owners and just gives those who look to legislate breeds or dog restrictions more ammunition. Clearly this shouldn’t be a motive for euthanasia, but it’s important to remember that aggressive dogs reflect badly on all dog owners.
Robi Tatkin says
What a well written, compassionate article. Making the decision to put a dog to sleep for aggression is such a difficult topic. Clients often don’t have (or aren’t willing to use) the resources needed for professional help, wanting a “quick fix” when there are never any guarantees regarding behavior and that is sad. Many times there are circumstances beyond the owner’s control (like a new rescue with an undisclosed history or a dog who may just be genetically “wired” wrong). What makes me shake my head in wonderment is the people who have lived with a truly dangerous dog for a long time and don’t seek help earlier. I wish people could recognize the early signs or realize they are not doing their dog any favors by avoidance tactics so that they might not have to make such a heartbreaking decision later.
Kari Lavalli says
Having now encountered my first rescue that was not friendly towards children (though has now been retrained to think of them as giant ham dispensing objects who will play tug over and over) and who is leash aggressive (but NOT dog aggressive off-leash), I can certainly understand the difficulty of finally admitting that you have to give up on the dog. But I think the guilt comes from believing that death is a terminus. If one actually believes in the recycling of nature and even believes that spirits/souls never die but come back (a sort of reincarnation), then one can adopt a philosophy that the dog (or can apply this to humans as well) came at this time to learn a life lesson and may have to repeat that learning by leaving the world and coming back again. I had a landlady who did believe this and she would take in dumped dogs in Texas. She had requirements: they had to get along with her other animals and those of her tenants and they couldn’t be aggressive towards humans of any size/age. She took in one who honestly just hated men. Women were fine and dogs and cats were fine, but male humans were just not fine at all. She tried very hard to work the dog to the point where he could be — I won’t say “reliable” — manageable around men, but it simply didn’t work. And her philosophy towards the dog was that he was going to have to leave the planet and then come back and see if this issue could be resolved in the next life. She did truly believe in reincarnation and she did believe that every living thing was on earth to learn various lessons and the lesson in this case was that you can’t be aggressive with humans. I don’t know if that philosophy helps with such decisions (it did with her), but as you write in the article, it is exhausting to have to manage an untrustworthy dog. Now having one, I know that I’m much more tired taking it to classes and events than I am with my other dogs who are so reliable and predictable with their responses to humans and other dogs. If one has tried, truly tried, to retrain the dog and doesn’t succeed, then you really shouldn’t feel so guilty — people need to remember that genetics plays a part, development in the litter plays a part, and early life experiences play a part, and sometimes all of those things are just stacked against the dog.
Kat says
Reading all of these stories it’s clear to me that the people who have chosen to euthanize their dog for behavior issues were really choosing to end the suffering of a dog that while physically healthy was mentally very ill–I can’t think of any other way to describe a dog that attacks out of nowhere and appears confused about what happens when they return to themselves. Please, be kind to yourselves as soul scorching as it was you made the right call. To my way of looking at it it’s really no different than making the decision to euthanize a dog whose physical ailments are destroying their quality of life. It’s the hardest things we ever have to do as pet guardians but it’s still the right thing to do.
Finna’s issues have never been the result of mental instability but instead are the result of never having been given any tools for managing herself or her environment. She had only one tool for keeping the things that frightened her at bay aggressive displays including using her teeth but–and this is the reason we choose not to give up on her–she only used as much aggression as necessary to achieve her goal of getting the scary thing away and while she was clearly over threshold she knew what she was doing. If she’d been out of her head crazy and her aggression had appeared without obvious trigger she wouldn’t be with us today. We see her fear steadily decreasing and her toolkit steadily growing and we can predict what is going to be too much for her to make a good choice. Aggression will always be a handy tool for her because for her formative years it was her only tool but she’s steadily learning other tools are just as effective and much less effort. Today she chooses asking to go inside over flying at the fence to scream at the kids playing loud games on the street. She chooses playing fetch in the back of the house over trying to start a fence fight with the brat pack of chihuahuas across the street. Over all she’s choosing to be less aggressive and we have a pretty clear idea of what will be too much for her resulting in her grabbing her most familiar tool. Not that she isn’t still a work in progress and not that there aren’t sacrifices that we make to live with her (no entertaining for example) but her continual improvement encourages us to keep going. If she was mentally unstable and we couldn’t accurately predict what she was likely to do in any given circumstance it would be a different decision.
So to all who are still feeling guilty I’d say stop beating yourself up. You did all that you could for your dog and you made the right decision to end their mental torment. They had the best life they could with you no matter how brief.
LisaW says
These stories are breaking my heart. The love, commitment, and tragedy expressed is amazing. Life is full of tough choices and one of the toughest is when the hardest thing to do is also the best thing you can do. We have put three of our dogs down due to age-related health issues, which is soul-wrenching enough. Behavior issues often hold out the possibility of improvement, which is not always attainable.
Many years ago, we got a bloodhound from a family who lived in the country and had bred the mom a few times (I think today we’d call them back-yard-breeders). Ruby was a handsome, strong, stubborn pup that loved our other dog and us to the exclusion of most people and most other dogs. Around two years of age, she began to stiffen and growl at visitors in the house and anyone who approached the car got a full-on lunge, bark, snap. Around the time of her escalating behavior, our other dog was diagnosed with osteosarcoma and had one of her legs amputated. Her recuperation and care added to our collective stress and also made me realize I needed help with Ruby.
In those days, the training advice was pretty harsh and there weren’t many trainers available (never mind behaviorists). I started making phone calls and getting as many referrals as I could, and everyone I spoke to said, “Put her down.” I was shocked; she hadn’t bitten anyone, she was still young, and while her behavior problems were not something I had the ability to handle on my own, it seemed there must be something that could help her. I didn’t know where to turn next. I called the people we had gotten her from to see if they had heard of any problems with her littermates, and if so, did they have any names for me to contact. They didn’t know of any issues with her siblings but told me that Ruby’s mother had died, and they would be more than happy to take her back. We talked at length several times, and they were well-aware of her issues and still really wanted her back. It was with much sadness and some trepidation that we brought her back (yes, to live in the country on many acres with few visitors). Years later, we happened to meet someone who knew the family and had actually grown up with one of the sons. I can’t remember how it came up, but he told us that Ruby slept with the son every night, and while she was guarded with strangers and reactive to other dogs, she had lived a good, somewhat isolated life.
I don’t know how this story would have ended if the family had not taken her back. I have a feeling it would not have ended well. I have true empathy for those who do have to make the decision of euthanasia; it is a matter of quality of life for all involved – people and animals.
Margaret McLaughlin says
I am so glad I have never had to make this call. My Elly was the only dog I’ve ever had with “issues”, & hers were so context-specific that it was easy for me to manage. I had taken her at 8 months to finish raising her as a guide dog puppy after she was removed from a family who had not fulfilled their contractual obligations towards the school–or the dog. She did very well, but in advanced guide training started to exhibit fear of children & altho’ the school tried hard to help her work thru it she was eventually career-changed. The day I went to pick her up there were 2 older, appropriately-behaving children in the lobby when she was brought out, & she belly-crawled across the floor, urine streaming.
The generalized fear eased quickly. I was able to control her interactions with children 100%, since I live alone, have a fenced yard with a locked gate, & walked her on-leash to our training area. She became able to handle children, even toddlers & their unpredictability.
Her one remaining trigger, which lasted her whole life, was children with sticks; she would growl & lunge. It required both elements–had to be a child, had to have a stick. We had only one bad moment–we were walking a swamp path thru bog & quicksand at a county park (couldn’t step off the path) when we were approached by 2 families-worth of children, all holding sticks. I put her on a sit-stay facing left, called out to the parents to have the children hold their sticks on the right & hold them still; “the Lab is afraid of children with sticks”. They complied, while I kept her attention away.
The point of this rambling story is that SOME one-issue dogs can be safely managed without undue stress for either species, if all the right circumstances are in place. They were for us, & I am beyond grateful for the 14 wonderful years I had with Elly, & the many obedience & agility titles we earned together.
Just a few months ago I supported a friend thru her decision to euthanize her sweet, anxious pittie (with a bite history) after she made a serious attempt to bite another visitor. My friend is very social, lots of visitors, was pregnant with lots more visitors to come, her child would have friends–just too much disaster potential there. Different life situation, different dog (probably genetically unsound, which mine was not), different unavoidable outcome.
I have some other friends who are in total denial about their dog. He is dog-aggressive & human-aggressive & has a bite history, & so far their method of coping is to blame his victims. They will not train & cannot manage. I foresee a serious attack on a child someday, & so far they have not been willing to make any changes. If it were my call, that dog would be euthanized before he can do harm, since harm he will eventually do, but it’s not my call. It’s like watching someone stand on the railroad tracks.
Jennifer says
I’ve had to deal with this difficult decision twice in my life. The first was with a 3 year old male Rottweiler. He was my teenage son’s dog. Was acquired from a reputable breeder, neutered prior to sexual maturity, and well-socialized. In spite of that, he had not only a very high prey-drive (he’d broken windows trying to get at children/people outdoors), but a Jekyll/Hyde personality. He had already bitten twice (fortunately not seriously), and though we did our best to manage the situation, the decision was made to euthanize him to prevent anyone else from being injured. Though it was an extremely emotional time, we do not regret the decision. Our current GSD bit my husband not long after we acquired him. He was an intact sexually mature male when we acquired him from animal control. Of course we had him neutered right away. We are still not sure what triggered his attack of my husband requiring an emergency room visit and several stitches. We seriously considered euthanasia, but opted to manage instead. We are extremely mindful of our interactions with him and avoid confrontational circumstances that might cause an aggressive reaction, and we control who he interacts with. We do not regret the decision not to euthanize and he has not bitten again since.
Beth says
I was concerned by the Facebook posters who thought no dog should be euthanized for aggression, ever. More concerned by the apparent revelation that there are rescues that shuffle aggressive dogs from rescue to rescue. Until what, exactly? Who is served by this? Not the poor dog, who lives a life of constant stress. Not the people involved. Not the communities where these dogs are being fostered.
Beth says
I wanted to add something I’ve been thinking about. Some of these heartbreaking stories of love and loss have made me cry. Some of the poor dogs clearly had serious issues and didn’t even know what they were doing. Others seem to just overreact to normal confrontation and are more predictable but still couldn’t be trusted.
Which is what made me think of something I read about when Jack was an overly-mouthy puppy with very little bite inhibition.
I read in one or two locations that it is important to teach these kinds of pups how to inhibit the bite BEFORE teaching “no teeth on me.” We worked very hard on this, by allowing Jack to bite hands only as hard as we could tolerate and gradually over a few weeks asking for less and less pressure.
The theory— and I don’t know if it holds true—- is that this way if the dog ever feels trapped, where he thinks he has no other recourse except to bite, he’s already learned that humans have very delicate skin and need very little pressure to be hurt. So if the dog ever does bite, it may not be a skin-breaking bite.
Obviously this would not help at all for the dog who has totally lost control. But for the dog that bites when someone comes over the top of him— the self-defense bite– if the dog still has his wits about him it may be the difference between the sort of injury that scares the family enough to euthanize, and the sort of close call that alarms the family into being able to cope with new management techniques.
I wonder if anyone knows if there is truth to this? I know that Jack, who I worked on this with as a puppy, has accidentally caught me once or twice when we were playing rough with tug toys and the bite was always soft. Maddie, who came to me as an adult, is a sweet dog but if she accidentally gets you with a mis-judged lunge at a toy (more common now she is losing her eyesight, so we must be careful), it really hurts.
Mary B says
I had an aggressive beagle. I lived in fear that I would lose my homeowners insurance. For years my life revolved around managing his behavior. I was afraid to have people visit. I was afraid to take him for walks (he would lunge on leash at anyone who passed by). I loved that dog with all I had. When he died of old age I felt an amazing relief. I would never judge anyone for making the difficult decision to euthanize. I’m grateful my dog never seriously hurt anyone. We were lucky.
Maria says
There was a time when I would have been horrified at the idea of putting down a dog that had not seriously injured someone, but dealing with a series of rescue dogs has taught me how hard it is to manage and reform unstable behavior, and I now understand much better how a problem can spiral out of control in spite of an owner’s best efforts. Still, even though all my dogs have had their troubles, including some aggression issues, I never imagined I’d have to make the decision myself. A few weeks ago I took in a young dog from a bad owner situation. He was physically healthy — beautiful, in fact — but he had been kept continually chained, neglected and probably abused. After several instances of unprovoked, unpredictable aggression toward me, and after consulting with a trainer and my vet, I decided within days of taking him in that the best decision was to euthanize him. I wish there had been another option, but keeping him would have been unsafe and unfair to my other dogs, and I could not in good conscience have passed him on to a shelter or another owner. I had hoped to at least give him a peaceful exit, but he became very aggressive at the vet clinic and his last minutes were rough. I think that will always haunt me.
I have moments when I wonder whether I should have given him more time. He was gorgeous and incredibly smart, and if he’d had a decent home from puppyhood he might have been a wonderful dog. It’s easy even now to imagine some happy alternate universe in which he would have been transformed into a loving, reliable companion. In reality, he would have needed a lifetime of careful management, and still the risk would have remained. Reading your thoughtful, compassionate post and all the wonderful comments helps me make peace with my decision. Thank you.
Lynne Lightowler-Buck says
Spouse’s Dad was dying. Would we take Ziggy? Sure. Ziggy was a rescue, found living off road kill and then taken by Fred/Dad. Fred thought it funny that Ziggy was aggressive around his food. That should have been a signal. 12 hours round trip brought this again rescued being to us. We were able to give him 14 more months of living beyond the 1st drawing of blood off my husband’s hand when feeding Ziggy . . . lightning fast, as was D, though not fast enuf. The next step was consultation with Cornell U. Animal Behavior Clinic. Matched against 3 paths, Ziggy had 2: both dominant and fear aggression behavior. Training ensued, progress seemed to occur. I was so naive. The two weeks before we eventually surrendered to not being able to do more, I was feeding him, reaching for the muzzle, and he was gripping my thigh and going for my head area. My response of screaming at him seemed to cowe him. I reconnected with Cornell, their head person, and sought advice. They said there were no places available, that we’d provided life and companionship with our other dogs, etc. We could keep him, but aggression would accelerate. I believe in the spirit guides inherent in us all, the devic level of existence, such as written of at Findhorn in Scotland. So I asked for their aid with Ziggy, so he understood how far he had chosen to go outside of his bounds of connection with humans. It was likely the most peaceful time of this dog’s life as he was angelic (almost). We went to Cornell, as they were going to autopsy him to see what might be noted could be a cause of his behavior. The only thing found was a depression in one area of his brain. I felt I failed him, and I certainly did in some ways being too naive in dogs behavior and responses and such. It’s a HUGE job to know how to handle what can potentially harm or kill yourself or any one else. If you cannot be Alpha in your environment, then don’t have critters! And I know no place that provides that level of training to the public. The Monks at New Skete might retrain . . . but who out there can train me? What is available so I can learn? Does Cesar have something? Do you? This happened years back . . . and I’m sitting here with tears writing it.
liz says
Regarding “a good home in the country,” relocating definitely comes with its own challenges. I moved for many reasons, and didn’t fully consider the impact it would have on working on fear aggression issues. Stimuli was plentiful in the city (too plentiful), and consistently near absent in the rural setting. So the trick became continuing training for overall improvement and the “random” stimulus event by having to drive farther, safely seek out the happening spots, coordinate more, and ask bigger favors of those working with me in that they had to drive farther too. We did work it out (no way to say what had the biggest impact- quieter setting, cont’d. training, etc) but just thought I’d echo that moving isn’t necessarily an easy fix. And management-wise, having to securely fence a large property is another hurdle.
But wow, wow. Thanks for the incomparable resource, and I’m so so sorry…
Sue Hansen says
Here are options to consider:
1) medication. Talk to your vet. Some dogs are “wired” that way and cannot help their behavior. But “there is a pill for that”.
2) A sanctuary. This requires finding a good one and being able to afford it. Here is one I recommend upstate NY, “Silver Streak” @ $200/mo + any vet bills.
3) Euthanasia? Sometimes it is the only alternative left. Read this, “Letting Go of Genie” http://abettershelter.com/abettershelter/information/Letting_Go_of_Genie.pdf
In the end, do NOT feel guilty.
You were the one who tried to save the dog, when no one else could or would.
Do not beat yourself up.
The dog will go to a better place.
And you can save another.
Susanne says
I have been a veterinary Assistant for over 25 years, I am also a groomer and I have been studying dog behavior for over 10 years. I also run a puppy program, that’s been going for over 10 years. A lot of these behavioral issues could be avoided by early socialization. I feel sick to my stomach when I relize how many puppies out there get no socialization training, the difference in these dogs that take puppy school and owner education and dogs that got none is mind blowing and we as a society have to make changes to how we address getting a new puppy.
Obviously medical issues can trigger behavioral problems so I am not referring to those animals.
I am very passionate about this issue, as I deal with many dogs a day, many that are dangerous. I hope that someday it becomes mandatory for new puppies to take a socialization program, whether its in a class setting, or private where the owners go out and complete a program on their own.
Susanne Frederiksen
Lisbeth says
What’s harder than having your vicious dog put down? Burying your child because no one, including you Patricia McConnell, was willing to come out and say that pit bull type dogs are dangerous at all times and are not meant to be pets.
Rhonda says
Me and my husband just had to make this very sad decision a couple of days ago…She was very aggressive with my other animals..I had to keep her separated from them and she turned aggressive towards us…I tried for 3 yrs with her, its very exhausting and the hardest decision I had to make, to this day I still ask myself if I did the right thing..:(
Beverly Dussia says
Thank you very much for this article. I had to make exactly that decision 3 weeks ago. My rescued 11 month old German Shepherd absolutely adored me and I him but after being evaluated by a veterinary behaviorist and trying to correct his behavior with medication and training, it became abundantly clear that it would never be safe to rehome him, be around anyone except me or even play in my fenced in yard since the fence was no obstacle. His level of anxiety and fear was so great that I don’t believe he could possibly be enjoying life. I never thought I could possibly give up on any dog because I’ve never believed any dog was born bad. I have told very few people because I can’t handle the “I would never do that” comment because they have no idea! I didn’t even realize how stressed out my other 3 dogs were until after he was gone. My heart is broken but I believe I did the right thing for him, I hope he is at peace and that he forgives me.
Glenna says
Thank you. As many read this I hope they realize what a difficult decision the guardians of these animals go through. It weighs heavily on their hearts and minds. Not a decision that is ever made lightly.
We adopted a dog when she was 3 and not long after she suffered a seizure. After several tests it is believed that she had suffered some brain damage from her previous life. We are well aware that her personality can/will change because of her short circuits.
We have already seen some of those changes, growls at our grandchildren and strangers and friends alike. Growls and changed behavior with other dogs we have.
For now we deal with the situations but know that eventually not because of physical health but because of the downward spiral of mental health we will have to make the decision.
This dog is loved beyond belief and is my heart dog and it hurts my soul every time a see her slipping further away.
People who never have gone through this will never understand how it makes you feel. Negative comments just make it that much harder when what you really need is empathy for your situation.
Rebecca Rice says
I haven’t had to make this decision, thankfully. My current greyhound started off as an extremely fearful dog, but I am lucky that her default behavior was fleeing or shutting down, not aggression. But getting her to a place where she is now, most of the time, happy in life was a long, sometimes exhausting experience. I can only imagine that dealing with an aggressive dog is all that, and more, since there has to be the added emotional roller coaster of being afraid of your own pet. But at the same time, there are those days that give you that little glimmer of hope, which is what makes the decision about euthanasia for behavioral problems even more difficult.
I will say that one aspect I struggled with when dealing with Katie, especially at the beginning, was when people would ask me why I was spending all this time, money, and effort on this dog, when there were perfectly friendly, happy dogs sitting in shelters that would be euthanized for lack of a home. That was a hard question… my general answer was that I saw potential in Katie, potential to be a happy dog, and that I thought she deserved a chance. But still, it is something I would struggle with in the future, if I am ever in the same situation. Is it fair to that other dog? On the other hand, having chosen to take in a shy dog, is it fair to just give up on them? Until you live the situation, it’s hard to know what the right decision is.
And then I think about my stray rat terrier I found, a little dog I named Pixie. She was wandering the streets, and was never claimed by her owner after I turned her in to Animal Control. So, she came home with me. She could be sweet as anything, and then just turn snarly. Basically, she seemed grumpy most of the time, and would snap at the other animals when they came near, especially the cats, since they were roughly her size and there was some competitiveness between them with regards to lap space in particular. They’d step on each other while trying to get positioned, which would result in her growling and snapping. Turned out that she had severe bilateral luxating patellas, and was probably in constant low-grade pain and didn’t like being bumped by other animals because it made it worse. Two surgeries later, her personality is SO different! Sweet, cuddly, playful, and only snaps when she is actually stepped on, instead of when something is just “close” to stepping on her (which I find to be understandable… she is 9 pounds to the greyhound’s 56, so being stepped on is serious). But I was lucky in that I had both pet insurance and the money to cover the 10% co-pay on the $6,000+ that the surgeries cost. I often wonder what would happen to her in a more normal household, that couldn’t afford to pay for that. Would she wind up euthanized? Was she abandoned on the street after snapping once too often? She was estimated to be 3-5 years old at the time I got her, and could easily be described as a “snappy” dog at the time. I wonder how many dogs are out there like her, with “behavior” problems that really are medical problems in disguise? And what do you trainers tell people, when there is a medical issue, that can be fixed, but owner either can’t afford to or simply doesn’t want to spend the money to fix it?
Betty says
this article is well written and right now I am trying to make a decision for one of our dogs. Most of the year she is sweet loving and easy to manage. But a few times a year she gets very irritable (shes been spayed already). Many times not knowing that she is in this mood it can take minor things to set her off. One of my other dogs walked past her one day and she attacked. Thankfully the dog she attacked just fell to the floor and didn’t fight back, the fight stopped immediatly. But, just the other day her bad mood hit and was triggered by our neighbors dog and a fight insued between my hound and border collie. The border collie didn’t back down, I went out to stop the fight and I ended up getting knocked down and hurt. I can’t find anyone who will take the hound. I firmly believe that she would do well as the only dog in the home. I will give the person every dirty detail about why it needs to be that way. But I do understand anyone’s fear but now I’m looking at having to euthanize her becasue I have four other rescues. It’s either her, or the other four. I’m still healing from being thrown to the ground I can’t handle the fear of me or the other dogs getting hurt in one of these outbursts. As I type this, my hound is sleeping contently on her end of the sofa being the sweet dog we want her to be.
Ellen says
The thing that I hear from many folks on here is that they think of their dogs as human kids and that is one of the biggest issues I encounter as a trainer and canine behavior counselor. I also encounter many people with tons of emotional baggage that they lay on their dogs like a therapist. They are animals that help support us emotionally, but whose needs should be filled prior to any of ours.
What I do NOT hear is that every opportunity had been explored and that they attempted working with a real-world behaviorist/trainer. Granted, many have come to light more so in recent years, but they are out there.
Meds should be temporary and are not a way of life, and neither is a sanctuary kept apart from human contact. That is a fate worse than death, no matter how glamorous you think it is. Not many dogs can land at Best Friends or Pets Alive where life is a picnic. Many of the dogs can be rehabbed to live in a home, but the owners have to be willing to change and step up to the plate as leaders. By reading many of the comments, it is coming through that their dogs were only reflections of their anxious, nervous, and down-trodden selves. Dogs do not trust or follow insecurity or unbalanced leaders – only humans do 🙂 The lower you sink, the worse their behavior gets until they are lashing out. Aggression is a symptom of a much larger issue, and is not the issue over 90% of the time. Misfiring and miswired dogs are rare. Humans not able to communicate on a canine’s level abound.
Please seek the help of an experienced professional to evaluate your dog and you, and PLEASE rule out thyroid issues by having your vet send a blood sample to Dr. Jean Dodds’ lab in CA at her Hemopet DOT org location. Her life scans are the gold standard for these tests. Your vet cannot possibly do them in this detail.
Please locate a holistic vet who can help you determine if the aggression might be due to vaccinosis and/or his latest rabies vaccination. You can search on AHVMA dot org. Your traditional vet will not even consider this if it’s been more than a few days post vaccination, but we’ve seen emerging patterns, especially in shelter dogs, where no titer testing is done to see if they have already had their shots and have immunity – rabies being the law.
Not all dogs can be saved, but you’d be surprised how many can be saved if we would respect and treat them like dogs instead of furry humans. Change the state of mind and the body will follow, but it begins with the humans and their willingness to look at their behavior and energy, have an open mind and accept change. Your dog needs a leader that they can trust and treats them fairly with mutual respect; one who gives them structure, rules and boundaries, not just love and affection all the time. As Cesar says, dogs are the only species on this earth whose only job is to please us – and that they do.
Marjorie says
After reading all these comments it is evident that there are many conscientious, empathetic and caring souls that are willing to put their dogs well being above their owner. I truly understand wanting to give a dog the best chance possible for a meaningful and happy life, but I don’t think it should come at the expense of everyone else in the home and community including the owner. From what many people here have described in their experience and care of an aggressive dog it appears as if they have made that dog the nucleus of their world to the determent of everyone else and that is just not a healthy situation for anyone.
Dr. McConnell’s article here has done a great job in gently and compassionately providing perspective and acceptance to those who may have gotten too close and in too deep to find their way clear.
Chris from Boise says
Thank you Trisha for this most thoughtful column. The number of people reporting in these comments they have had to face this situation is surprising to me, as is the range of breeds involved, and how sad I am for you. I had thought this level of aggression was extremely rare, but come to think of it, over the last couple of decades three friends have euthanized their dogs for unprovoked aggression. One was a cattle dog mix with extreme prey drive directed toward smaller animals, though fine with people of all ages. The other two (one lab from a breeder, one pointer mix from a rescue) became Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde as they matured – which must have been severe mental illness. Most of the time they were fine, then they’d get the blank stare that several have described, and went after their owners. In all three cases, the owners did everything they could, with training, vet consults, and management, and finally (with the support of their vets) decided the problem was incurable. All three were devastated both by the damage (owner bites and neighborhood pets killed) their dogs caused and by the awful decisions they had to make. It is an absolutely heartbreaking situation. Is it becoming more common, or just more reported?
Linda says
As a rescuer, I am constantly asked to take in a dog that is “wonderful and loving, but we can’t keep him because he’s bitten 4 people”. Many say he should be placed in a home with no children, even though he’s bitten the wife and the mother-in-law.
It is my responsibility as a rescuer to not pass off known problems to others. As you state, just because you place the dog in a home with no children doesn’t mean the dog will never be exposed to children. What if the gate is accidently left open or the dog jumps the fence, or a child reaches over the fence to pet the dog?
What is even more frustrating for me are the trainers and vets who, when asked to euthanize an aggressive dog, refer them to rescue as if we don’t mind getting bitten.
Nic1 says
Just a beautiful and compassionate blog post and utterly heart breaking to read these comments. My heart goes out to every single person who has to make this truly awful decision.
‘Change the state of mind and the body will follow, but it begins with the humans and their willingness to look at their behavior and energy, have an open mind and accept change.’
Ellen – If only the solution were THAT simple. People have done their utmost to do the best that they can for their dogs and no assumptions can be made that people are treating their canine companions as furry children. We just don’t know individual people’s circumstances. They have done their best. That is all any of us can do.
Also, understanding that biology, genetics and the environment are all contributing factors here complicates this issue tremendously. It’s not black and white. And a real word trainer and behaviourist understands that.
em says
I have been so moved by the stories here. I, too, have been wondering about whether there has been a change in the types and severity of dog aggression on humans in the last twenty or so years.
I have no answers, but I do have a few musing speculations about some differences I see in how my generation relates to dogs compared to how my parents’ did.
Keeping it brief, to my parents, a dog who growled or even snapped at a stranger approaching the house or kids was NOT considered a temperament problem. If anything, a mild reaction of this type was considered a POSITIVE attribute in a dog. More serious responses or those that could not be curbed by owner intervention would have been considered a problem, but probably a managable one unless the dog was truly an attack (not a nip) risk.
There is some historical support for this attitude as well. Columella, author of an agricultural treatise from 1st century Rome, dismisses a “fawning” dog who WON’T bark at, threaten, or bite a stranger as “worthless”.
But on the other hand, again according to Columella, a dog who was “so vicious as to be a danger to his OWN people” was a liability not to be tolerated. He doesn’t spell out the solution, but safe to surmise that by “not to be kept”, he intended his readers to infer that such dogs were not to be kept alive. Clearly, dogs with this sort of behavior are attested as far back as the first century. But dogs of the first century with this behavior would likely not have been allowed to survive for long.
Curiously, I see the same basic assumption in my parents, family and friends of their generation. A dog who nipped the mailman might be kept without much of a qualm, but a dog who deliberately bit or threatened someone inside the household would have been euthanized. Swiftly, without question, and with sadness, but without regret. The same goes for a dog who bit a stranger severely, without warning, or CLEAR provocation. My dad might say that a person should know better than to startle a dog, take its food, enter its space or touch it or the children in its family without permission. But if that dog’s reaction went beyond a quick, restrained snap or a loud warning, he would not have hesitated, and he would never have passed an animal he believed to be dangerous on to anyone else. To my knowledge, neither he nor anyone else in my close family has every had to make that call for behavioral reasons, but growing up, I had no doubt that he would.
Today, I wonder whether changing attitudes toward our dogs (for the good, I largely believe) and increasing risk of litigation have turned this model on its head. People are terrified of dogs who show the slightest hostility toward strange people (for good reason and it may be the unfortunate reality that dogs in the future will simply need to be 100% human friendly, all the time, to be fit for their role as companion animals) even if the dogs are fairly emotionally stable and inhibited in their responses. As an unfortunate consequence of this heightened anxiety, and the resultant to desire to avoid ALL aggression in dogs, I wonder if we are losing our ability to distinguish between a relatively reliable dog with some undesirable behaviors and dogs who are truly dangerous.
Obviously, tragedies can happen even in the least predictable circumstances (the sweet and patient dog who has a seizure and severely bites a beloved child or owner, for instance).
But I wonder whether the desire to save the dog who nips the mailman may be leading us to feel unwarranted guilt and regret about euthanizing the dog who is dangerous to his own people or the one who is truly RAGING at strangers or other dogs, and certainly, it seems that there is something fundamentally reversed about our outlook, compared to my parents’ generation, if risk to YOURSELF from a dog is considered acceptable, if only the public can be protected from him by vigilant management. I wonder, in short, whether some of the percieved increase in extreme aggression in dogs might be the result of people keeping (or god forbid) passing on dogs who in the past would have been euthanized. Freak accidents happen, but I am struck by how many of the tragic stories I’ve read reflect years of struggle following multiple incidents. I would love to be in a world where every dog can be helped to be a safe member of the community, but I don’t believe that we have either the theraputic tools or skills to make that possible, no matter how committed or loving we are to our canine companions.
My heart goes out to everyone facing this issue, it truly does.
Beth says
Em, to address your point, when I was a girl we had a sweet Springer Spaniel who, as is true of many spaniels, was funny about personal space. She once nipped a little neighbor girl who came into our yard uninvited and tried to pet the dog, who was on a stakeout.
Not only did no one report the dog. The general consensus was the girl had no right being there without invite, and no one should approach a chained dog. Doing so was asking for trouble.
We never thought of her as dangerous. No one did. In fact, she is fondly remembered as one of the best dogs our family ever had.
She was a gentle soul. The nip left a tiny scratch and would not have broken skin on an adult.
Yes, times have changed.
Laura says
How strange and wonderful the universe is. This is the second time ever looking at this blog, and clearly I was meant to read this post and all the heart felt comments. Like so many others, I made the gut wrenching decision to put down an aggressive, yet healthy 5 year old dog about 7 years ago. His name was Mr D, and he was a big, beautiful Rotti mix, whom I adopted as an 8 wk old puppy from a very well know organization based in Long Island, NY. My long term boyfriend and I were dedicated animal lovers with 3 cats, and we were so eager to welcome this sweet little pup into our lives. We were well intention-ed, but young and with limited financial resources. We did our best to train Mr D, but he was a challenging dog right from the start, showing concerning behavior even as a young pup. Unfortunately, my partner suffered from deteriorating mental health(which clearly did not help the situation), and when we finally split 4 years later after a major breakdown, I was left to not only pick up the pieces of our broken life, but with 4 cats and a huge, dangerous dog. But, I so loved him, and more then ever he was my best friend and companion. I took him on long hikes, romps in the dog park, and visited friends with him, and he NEVER had any aggression towards strangers, other dogs, or myself when out and about. The trouble was in the house with his “family,” myself and my two male roommates. He guarded his territory with a fury, and challenged us constantly with increasingly aggressive growling, barking and snapping. We were all very aware of his triggers, and managed to avoid confrontation for a long time. But things were getting worse, and after he bit my roommate for the second time, and nearly got the other and myself several times, I knew something had to be done. We felt terrorized in our own home. At this point I was now engaged to a man with a 2 year old and was planning on moving into his home in a few months, and could not even consider bringing Mr D. I knew re-homing him or sending him to a shelter was not fair or safe for him or anyone else, since he would be broken heart-ed and potentially even more dangerous. He was increasingly becoming more nervous and anxious, and responded very badly when we tried to bring him to my fiances wood shop for a week, thinking that perhaps he could be a “shop dog.” I literally made myself sick over the decision to euthanize him, and when I finally did, my own vet, and a half dozen others I called refused to help me, and all made me feel like I had failed, outright blaming me, and insisting that I shell out big money(which I did not have), for training and/or behaviorists. I was horrified, and desperate for help, and could not believe how I was being treated. My wise sister finally suggested that I try a more urban location for a vet, perhaps they would be more sympathetic, and sure enough, thank god, I found a kind and compassionate doctor who listened to my story, comforted me with his own, and ultimately assisted me. When I brought Mr D into the office he took one look at him and told me he was most certainly a Rotti/Doberman mix(we had been told he was a rotti/lab). He also knew, without asking, where he had come from, and told me that he had seen many of these pups from the same organization, and that they brought them up from down south where they were rescued from dog fighting rings, and adopted them out to unknowing suburban NY’rs. I was amazed and appalled. I’m sure I could have done a better job training him, if I had better financial resources and emotional strength and support to do so, but I also know that it was not my fault. He was a mentally sick dog, and I truly believe that he would never have been a safe and happy dog, no matter what. I was so validated when the vet was able to help me realize that. He helped make one of the hardest decisions I ever had to make just a tiny bit easier, and I am forever grateful for that. As I left his office in tears, he put his hand on my should and told me that “one day I will have another dog, and it will be a good dog, and you will realize just how sick of a dog you had.” I will never forget those words.
I came here to this blog looking for guidance for my 4 month old border collie/gr pyr mix, who is…gasp…. showing some borderline aggressive behavior, and cannot believe this is the subject I came upon. I was compelled to share my story too. I have been just beside myself the last few days, worried about my beautiful new puppy, my two young children, and sick with thoughts and memories of Mr D. I am so worried about having another aggressive dog, and cannot bare the thought of going through that again. I am bringing my new girl, Maggie, to a trainer tomorrow, and starting a clicker training course on Sunday, and I am determined to do more for her then I could for Mr D. Please send some good, happy, open mouthed, waggy-body doggy vibes my way!!
Ellen says
Nici – I never said it was black and white and did say that not all dogs can be saved. However, when I read that the “unpredictable and moody” dog that attacks is now calmly sleeping at “her” end of the couch, well, I can tell you that this person has given this dog too many privileges and mixed messages just by allowing that behavior. I can tell a lot during a phone consult before I even get to the home.
Yes, real world trainers/behaviorists do know that which is why I said they (we) will evaluate your dog, you and your environment. Evidently, you didn’t read the entire post or comprehend it. Nothing is simple in life, and many of these dogs will take dedication and commitment. Something else I don’t see too much of these days which is why we have a pet retention problem that far outweighs any overpopulation problem.
There are studies being done that also point to pediatric spay/neuter, vaccinosis and years of garbage in pet food contributing to behavioral issues. We didn’t have that years ago and something very much to consider. Surgically altering and removing entire hormone producing organs in animals that are eight and ten weeks of age is ludicrous, but what shelters and rescues are doing to get their inventory of puppies out the door. As someone also involved with rescue, we are seeing many patterns we can identify and hopefully can prove to have them halted. We are suggesting shelters and rescues look into alternative s/n procedures like OSS, TL, VAS, and Zeuterin that will allow dogs to maintain their hormones, or part of them, for proper development of mind as well as body.
At the very least, I never advocate for surgical s/n at less then full grown maturity unless medically necessary or not so responsible people have adopted a dog whose physical traits should definitely not be passed on.
Jim says
Dr. McConnell,
Thank you for your post.
I am a new dog owner at 52, who rescued a 6 year old Shihtzu five months ago.
Two weeks ago, he bit me just below my lower lip out of the blue and I needed 85 stitches. Admittedly, I was in his face being affectionate with him — and I will change this and some other ways I interact with him (i.e., doesn’t sleep upstairs with the family or allowed on our bed).
Max is a mellow companion dog so that was out of character for him. But I was also taken aback how quick friends were to tell me if he bites like that, he should be put down.
I am not going to take this path.
Rather, after talking to my vet, I will start with a behaviorist. Max only has three teeth so we’ve also discussed removing his canines to significantly remove any risk.
I feel for all the stories people have shared and don’t believe I am in denial about Max; in fact, the pain that many of you went through underscores my belief that we can get through this situation. I believe he is totally redeemable and I look forward to many happy years ahead with him.
Beth says
I wanted to add a further comment to em’s point. I think I once relayed a scary story that happened to us: we were walking with the Corgis in a park. Our dogs were leashed. We were passing about 20 yards or so from a young man or older teen with a pitbull– the smallish sort, maybe 40 pounds, lean and muscular. His dog was staring. Jack, who is wonderful with other dogs, was purposely avoiding even glancing in the direction of the other dog. The pittie, in one horribly silent move, slipped his harness and charged full speed at Jack. He immediately went for the back of Jack’s neck– the death grip. His speed hurt his chances, and I believe he misjudged just how big a Corgis neck and shoulders are. He failed to get a hold. He came back again–and again— and again while I just tried to keep Maddie out of the way and my husband repeatedly kicked as hard as he could at the pittie. The whole time Jack, bless his heart, tried neither to run nor engage but kept giving calming signals. He never did connect because my husband played blocker and finally he ran off and apparently kept running. But there is no doubt in my mind that had I been walking a Cocker Spaniel instead of a Corgi, my dog would have been dead with two shakes. The fact that my dog’s neck was too wide to get a good grip had to do with physics, not the intent of the other dog. It was horrible and I had to quickly put “what if” out of my mind or I would have been afraid to walk them again.
My opinion is that a dog who is that intent on doing harm— who, in a public space with no provocation is so determined to try to kill a dog it never saw that it will slip a harness and try not to fight, but to grab the back of the neck– will never be safe. He can be trained, perhaps, to not react to other dogs, but what if he ever gets loose? It’s like training a beagle to ignore your tame bunny. You know he’s just waiting for his chance to pick up the chase.
In today’s densely populated society, I don’t think it’s responsible to breed dogs who see other dogs and/or people as prey, or to breed dogs who are bred to use their own judgement in “engaging” when it comes to personal protection. Barking and charging, yes. Biting and holding, no. But sadly there are plenty of people breeding both. And too many of these dogs end up being part of someone’s heartbreak, because they are generally intensely loving of their chosen people.
Barb says
Thanks to everyone who responded to this blog. It is so very timely for me, as I have been dealing with severe anxiety and fear aggression in a rescue dog for 5 months. He is about two years old, a cockapoo, and cannot tolerate being groomed. My trainer and vet are working with me. They have referred me to a behavioral specialist as a last resort. On Prozac he shows improvement, but continues to be unpredictable, guarding toys and mouthing excessively. All the posts have been helpful for me to see that there are options and quality of life for the family and the dog are important. I have been feeling like a failure after having a variety of dogs during my life that have not been aggressive and died from old age after a long and peaceful life. I needed this information desperately. Thank you.
Theresa says
tonight I made the decision to euthanize my chow/lab mix dog that I had for a year and a half he was 5 years old. He was very dog aggressive and people aggressive and had anxiety. I even had him on doggy Prozac. We could never have anyone enter our house he would become very aggressive and he would bite them if we gave him the opportunity which we did not. He bit my neighbor he bit my sister when she was in our yard and he would definitely bite other dogs if he had the chance. I feared that if he ever got out and that someone that I would get sued and lose my house and feel horrible if he injured someone. but what made it such a difficult decision is when he was with me he was a big puppy dog not aggressive at all he was a good boy. but I was the only human he could have contact with.I feel horrible for having to do it but for his quality of life he couldn’t go to dog parks he couldn’t play with other dogs his life would just be in the house barking at every sound hear it outside. And I would live in fear in the summer if he bust out a window at the kids playing outside I have no doubt he would kill a dog and harm a child if not worse. I contemplate and hope I did the right thing I know I did but the decision still hurts and I’m sad. we gave him lots of love when he was here had two cats to play with and he was fine with cats his only fault was he loves too much and wanted to protect me and our house. but for his quality of life I believe it was the right choice to make. and I will probably always wonder if I made the right decision.
Nic1 says
Beth, I agree with you and have expressed similar opinions in the past on this as you may remember. The dog that terrified you all was behaving more like a predator than a pet. Breed type and residual behaviour is an incredibly emotive subject for a lot of people. Pittie types don’t breed ‘true’ and there are some of these types that seem to make great pets as many people will testify. However, it’s not wise to ignore their genetic ancestry. I think there needs to be an honest and rational debate about breeding, selling and owning certain types of dogs as ‘pets.’ We live in a world with increasing numbers of dogs and people. Times have changed. Some countries in northern Europe seem to be a little bit more pragmatic here and have adopted policy and slightly controversial laws to reflect this. However, they don’t have the horrific problem of unwanted dogs in rescue.
This story has been doing the rounds this week:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/11444464/Owners-let-Hulk-the-12-stone-pit-bull-play-with-toddler-son.html
Can someone please explain why people are breeding these animals? Protection? Get an alarm system.
Natasha says
What an encouraging article to read on a very sensitive subject. My partner and I recently found ourselves in a similar situation, our 3-4 yr old rescue Newf became aggressive with our 6 year old lab. After several incidences that escalated both in frequency and severity we made the agonizingly painful decision to euthanize our beloved pet. We struggle even to this day, analyzing the situation and playing the ‘what if’ game but we come to the same conclusion, his behavior was unpredictable, his triggers became indeterminate, and ultimately he was very sick. You could see the confusion written on his face when a situation came about. He looked as though he knew his response was going to be inappropriate but couldn’t stop it. We worked with vets, trainers and behaviorists to manage him. It worked for a period of time but in the end it just wasn’t enough. We have had people shame and criticize us for making our decision. It has been a struggle but reading this article has provided me with more assurance that we did indeed do the right thing. Thank you for taking the time to write this, I had no idea how many people had been through what we had until we made our story public as this is such a taboo subject.
LisaW says
I wasn’t going to post this comment. I was just going to keep quiet and let it go. But I can’t. There have been several references to people being too soft, too purely positive, too unclear that dogs are not children, too quick to say it’s too hard, not exhausting every resource and every dollar one has, which are thinly veiled ways of saying it’s the human’s fault. These judgments do nothing to add to the conversation, they simply move it to a place where blame can be assigned. Tricia’s post specifically acknowledged “It’s no one’s decision but your own.” I wish we could have stayed with that premise.
There have also been words used such as alpha, leader of the pack, clear boundaries, dominant, doggy boot camp, etc. I always thought that aggression begets aggression. If a dog is showing signs of aggression, as defined by this post, wouldn’t handling it with an aggressive approach be one of the worst things we could do? I don’t believe for one minute that a dog on the couch is the gateway to an aggressive behavior down the road. And how does one love a dog too much?
And now we’ve circled back to specific breeds as too dangerous, I can’t even begin to address that. I just find these different ideas and words that have percolated up very interesting as we try to tackle this incredibly difficult and sensitive subject.
Trisha says
So much to say, and so little time in which to express it. Here’s what I can say right ow this morning: First, kudos to em for writing an insightful discussion about how the changing culture might be affecting the level of guilt we feel about putting down a dangerous dog. I found it thought provoking and important; thank you. Second, LisaW just made a comment that I think is also very important. Yes, people make mistakes, and yes, there are dogs out there who became aggressive because of them, but LisaW is right that the point of my post was to 1) have an outline of issues to consider when struggling with the decision and 2) to provide compassion and care to the people who have already made the painful decision to put their dog down. If reading the comments doesn’t convince people that dog owners who have had to euthanize their dog over behavioral problems don’t deserve our sympathy, I don’t know what would. Later today I’m going to post a short article about dealing with guilt, because it seems that guilt is such a prevalent emotion of responsible dog owners. I suspect that guilt is an emotion that dogs rarely feel–no wonder we love them so much. Last, for now, thank you again for all the brave people who have shared their stories with us. My heart goes out to you all.
Rebecca Rice says
Just a comment on why this “seems to be happening more now”. I am sure that attitudes towards dogs have changed, but also the lifestyle that most pets live has changed. I grew up in the days of free-range kids and pets. Our dogs and cats were let outside in the morning, and hopefully showed back up in the evening to come inside and be with the family. Quite frankly, the dog could have been out killing cats and terrorizing people all day, and no one would know who the owner was to complain to because they were almost never walked on-leash with family. You just knew to avoid that “big Irish setter”, or that the “black and tan hound is a cat-killer”. If the dog came back and was sweet to the family, that was that. Why would they listen to you about their dog’s behavior, when they never saw it themselves? So there could have been many stranger-aggressive dogs that just weren’t recognized.
Then there is the issue that life in general has changed in the last several generations. Cities are bigger and more densely populated. Women work outside the home more, children spend less time outside playing, people have fewer social gatherings at their homes. Dogs are spending more time alone during the day, less time roaming around with kids being exposed to new things, meeting fewer people. At the same time, I do believe that the public’s expectations about what a “good dog” is have also changed, so that dogs are expected to put up with a lot that my parents would have smacked us for. The dog is expected to tolerate being jumped on, poked, prodded, hit, especially by kids, and any expression of discomfort is not to be tolerated by the owner. Watch some YouTube videos and you have to wonder what parents are thinking!
Also, our attitude towards mental illness in general has changed. Instead of putting people with mental problems into institutions or hiding them away in the house, we now understand that many of these people can be helped to live more normal lives. I have to wonder if giving up on trying to rehab dogs with behavior issues makes people unconsciously feel like they would be letting down a human in a similar situation. In other words, have we absorbed the idea of rehabilitating mental illness in people to such a degree that putting down an aggressive dog makes us feel like we are back to the days of putting people in institutions for treatable diseases? Several people have mentioned the judgement that they got for making that decision (the dog, not the person one).
And then there are the dog breeds, in general. You have to keep in mind that most breeds started up in the Victorian era, as they pursued their eugenics goal of improving races/breeds by only allowing the “most ideal” specimens to breed. So the gene pools have gotten more concentrated, while some of the traits specified in breed standards are not really suited for modern life. The pit bull has already been mentioned, but there are other breeds that have undesirable attributes for our current lifestyle. I am on several dog lists, and hear laments that the border collie has been ruined because now they have the looks but not the drive (as if a suburban family really needs a dog that needs 9 hours of activity a day when they are juggling kids and work?), or that the American doberman lines are no good because the dogs have been bred to be “too friendly” (because having an aloof, protective dog is such a great thing when you live in the middle of a city?). And why would it be a crime to breed a short-haired Yorkie, when most owners keep them in a puppy cut anyway? But the complaint is that the breeds should be more stringently bred to remain true to purpose as well as looks, even when the jobs they were meant to do are in very short supply in our modern society. At the same time, if a popular winning dog in a breed has some behavior issue, including aggression, you are likely to get more pups with those issues as that dog gets bred more in order to get more winning dogs, and the gene pool gets more concentrated.
And finally, there is the issue of owner behavior. I don’t agree with Ellen that a lot of this has to do with owners not being alpha (plus, I have read the studies about how dogs aren’t true pack animals). I don’t see a lot of people on this blog treating their dogs as furry kids, and some of the posters have described the lengths that they went to in order to manage the dog. It can be exhausting having to manage each minute of a dog’s day, in order to keep every one safe, which is what you have to do with some of the more difficult dogs described. But, lets assume that in at least some cases it is down to the owner’s fault in not being a “true pack leader”. The reality is, those people aren’t likely to change, any more than you can train an omega to be an alpha dog. And, as I often put it, while it may be true that there is a home for every dog, it is also true that not every home is suitable for THIS dog. So lets say that the number of people wanting to own dogs has gone up, and the percentage of 100% reliable dogs has stayed the same. Some of the people who need 100% reliable dogs, because they are either unable or unwilling to learn how to deal with less reliable ones, are going to wind up with dogs that they aren’t suited to own. And that is still a situation that will have to be dealt with. And saying that people should first work with skilled trainers and behaviorists is ideal, but sometimes not practical. My Katie was painfully shy when I first got her, with generalized anxieties. I did work with skilled trainers ($400 in the first two weeks I had her), and then eventually with a behaviorist ($500/hour). That’s rent-money level to some dog owners, and therefore not even an option, no matter how much they may want to do it. I couldn’t have afforded it when I was younger and just starting out in my career, and would have had to return Katie to her rescue organization instead. Which would have been a great loss… she has grown into an awesome dog, even with her remaining quirks, and I have learned a lot of dog skills in having to deal with her.
Libby says
Two things. One, when someone says, “What would you do if it was your ____ it is usually because they know deep down what their decision is and want validation. Two, after our neighbors’ GSD with a long history of aggressive and dangerous behavior attacked my husband and me when it got loose from their yard, they immediately decided to have it put down after the required quarantine period. Then they proceded to never speak to us again. I can only assume it was a strange way of expressing the profound guilt that goes along with this decision. It seems to me that the hardest part of the decision is feeling as if you failed as an owner.
HFR says
@em’s comments are so interesting. It made me think that I do know some people who have dogs that exhibit behaviors that some would considerable unacceptable, but are fine by them. I have a friend who had a Golden who regularly bared her teeth if you touched her where she didn’t want to be touched or went near her food. My friend blew it off and just chalked it up to a quirk. The dog never bit anyone (but her, once without breaking skin) and was a sweet dog otherwise. Someone else may have seen that as a serious problem and who knows what would have happened. You have to ask if perhaps her laid back attitude may have kept it from escalating. We all know how contagious fear and stress are to a dog.
Every day there is a new study that comes out that proclaims how dogs feel and think just like us. With that comes higher expectations and with higher expectations comes greater disappointments.
And @LisaW, thank you so much for saying what I was thinking. Bravo!
Nic1 says
Rebecca Rice, great post.
Margaret McLaughlin says
LisaW & Rebecca Rice–well said, both of you. And for what it’s worth, I agree.
Jen says
My heart aches for those who say you failed. There is much we don’t know about the human brain, let alone the canine brain. I have an epileptic dog, and in addition to the dramatic, obvious generalized seizures, he has many small events where things clearly aren’t quite right- from blank stares or odd responses to very familiar commands (beyond the universal, “there’s poop to roll in over there. Did you say come? Have I ever heard that before?”), to incoordination, to times when he comes running, shaking and drooling in fear over apparently nothing other than some hallucination (especially that monsters are coming out of the smoke detectors in the middle of the night). These events sometimes are followed by generalized seizures and appear to be part of his epilepsy. I say this because my dog has a diagnosed condition and is on a lot of medication to try to control it. There is no positive diagnosis for idiopathic epilepsy, there are no signs that can be seen that we know of, and not all epileptic dogs can have their seizures controlled even with the newest medications and very best care. I feel very grateful after reading this post that my dog has never exhibited any signs of aggression even when he is very clearly distressed from whatever is going on in his brain. But for those who feel you failed: The brain is a very complicated place. We don’t understand it well, even in humans who can express what they’re experiencing. Many of these dogs who exhibit apparently inexplicable behavior may indeed suffer from terrible physiological problems that you cannot fix. This is real. We all need to accept this, and we would perhaps find it easier to forgive both ourselves and others if we did.
Ellen says
Rebecca – if you are referring to my comments, I never mentioned the word “alpha” and do not believe that true communication with canines has anything to do with being the alpha. Alphas are very quiet and confident individuals within a pack, and that’s why they are the leaders in a wolf pack. I am not a wolf, and although we all either live in a human or human and animal pack, there needs to be structure, discipline (mental stimulation), rules and boundaries for young children and animals to develop their basic coping skills. These things also exist in a wolf pack and is what makes their hunting skills exceptional, without one verbal utterance.
Being a good leader for your dog does not equate to dominating or ruling with an iron fist. It has to do with communicating with them on their level, being fair and consistent and giving them someone with whom they can feel secure. I read an excellent blog today and the point was more direction and less affection. How true, how true.
I must also point out that many people often misinterpret what they’re seeing as aggression where it is a warning and/or communication because the human has not picked up on the signals the dog was giving. Growling is not aggression. Attacking with intent to kill is aggression. Believe me, that bite was not out of the blue – the human just doesn’t know dog speak or body language. And ALL kids should be taught to respect a dog’s space and never allowed to climb, pull, punch and kick a dog. Let’s get back to parenting.
I feel for anyone who has had to make this heartwrenching decision. I just want folks to know that there is more help today than ever beyond what your vet or one trainer has to say, and please reach out for one of us to evaluate your entire situation and possibly keep you all together safely. Look for the trainers/behaviorists that work with packs of dogs on a daily basis and aren’t afraid to show you their work. They’ll be honest if they truly think your dog should be put down, but they also save many, many lives that were deemed hopeless.
Tammy says
So I know this is about people aggression and not animal aggression, but I’d add that you should seek the guidance of more than one trainer before making any decisions. I’m not saying “trainer shop” until you find one who says what you want to hear, when my dog was 4, we moved from an area where he regularly interacted with lots of other dogs to one where he did not get as much interaction & he began to exhibit signs of dog aggression. I took him to the trainer at my vet’s office, and after 3 sessions, she said that he was “unpredictable” and that I should consider euthanizing him before he injured another animal. I sought the advice of several friends, one of which recommended another trainer, who met with me at a local dog park, and encouraged me to take my dog there regularly to re-socialize him. Nine years later, my “unpredictable” dog still gets apprehensive occasionally around a new dog, but he’s never attacked anything.
Beth says
Nic1, predatory is exactly the word. Had I not seen it myself, I don’t know if I could have imagined a dog acting that way. The best comparison I have is it was like watching a cheetah going after a gazelle. Like the cheetah, it gave up after it was unable to connect, but likely would have not let go if it had. Gail Caldwell relays a similar story in “Let’s Take the Long Way Home”, with a worse outcome.
The dog was silent because it was hunting, and hunting animals don’t make noise to give themselves away. There was no growl, no bark, no raised hackles. Nothing. A still stare, a quick twist out of the harness, and a charge with an intent to kill.
When we talk about working with and retraining dog- aggressive dogs, I think there needs to be clarification on what we mean by “dog-aggressive.” The dog who is aggressive because he is afraid, or has poor socialization, or is status-seeking, or grouchy can often be worked with enough to keep everyone safe.
But the dog who sees other dogs (or heaven forbid people) as prey? I truly don’t think any amount of training reduces the risk enough.
I get that it’s ultimately the owner’s decision. But what about the victims? And potential victims? Surely their wishes are important too?
And no I am not talking about specific breeds. I am talking about dogs bred for a specific purpose who show innate desire to fulfill that purpose. Dogs who were bred to be violent and are eager to be that. That can be any breed, or mix.
I love the Phyllis D work referenced in this blog post because she talks about owner responsibility when dealing with an aggressive dog. And I think that’s so important. The whole no kill/ any dog can be saved movement has a very serious downside with consequences to us all.
Sister Antonia says
I really appreciated this article. As someone who has euthanized a dog for a serious mental condition causing debilitating fear, it helps to have some of it put into words. I don’t question that we made the right decision for our baby, her life was constant misery. However, it is hard to find answers when you are wrestling with the question and the guilt can be pretty devastating after the loss of a dog you love but know you can’t trust or keep safe from the destruction of its own mind or perceptions.
Laura says
Thank you for your insight. I have put down a beloved dog after 4 years of veterinary behavior consultations, professional training, and driving over 300 miles to your “Dog’s Best Friend” for another consult. The thing that made it so much easier to bear is remembering your trainers words “this is the most reactive dog I’ve ever seen”. I continued to work with the dog for two more years but made the decision after he bit me and a friend within a day.I adopted him at a “meet and greet” for a local rescue. I am sure he was never assessed for behavior. I will only look for dogs at reputable shelters who have undergone behavior assessments from now on.
Nic1 says
Ellen, Dogs don’t generally live in packs with strange dogs unless we force them too. When observed, they form loose, amorphous associations with other dogs or will pair up with an individual for a while. Also, the term alpha applied to wolf is misleading. They are simply parents.
I would avoid a trainer who is stuck in this defunct ideology of pack leader. It really has nothing to do with helping a dog who has learned aggression is the answer to dealing with situations it can’t cope with.
http://www.npwrc.usgs.gov/resource/mammals/alstat/
http://academyfordogtrainers.com/blog/2013/are-dogs-pack-animals/
Nic1 says
Beth, yes I think that defining the difference between aggression and predation is extremely important. Neurologically, it has a different pathway in the brain. Predation is something that feels good to the animal. Aggression, not. However, like you say, it doesn’t mean that we label breeds as dangerous per se, because as we know there is plenty of evidence to counteract that. However, I think that some types of predatory dogs, irrepective of breed, (in inexperienced, irresponsible human hands) can be much more ‘dangerous’ but are not necessarily aggressive or ‘vicious’ dogs.
I question why we continue to breed large, predatory dogs and sell them to inexperienced people as pets.
Joy says
I have a 14 year old dog that at two I was told was to aggressive and would never be ok with anyone or anything nor be safe in the world and I should put her down. I was told she would have to be managed and muzzled all her life. This Mum never gave up. While the road was long and lonely. At 14 she lives with another dog visits with select dogs and even educates pups that just because she is…….. she is not to be picked on and should be respected. She has two cat sisters as well. She lives well. I can even have her with children as long as the children and her follow the rules. Was she misdiagnosed or did we do a great job one , we will never know but had I put her down when told to we would not have had the 12 extra loving years we had. We just stopped listening to others experts and started to listen to her. we went slow. We managed her and we loved on her terms and life is on her terms. I am ok with that.
Cathy Maynen says
Haven been reading many of the posts, A very wise person I know has said – “There is no such thing as a childless home.” and I firmly believe in that also. Anyone who is thinking that they are managing an aggressive dog problem and they don’t have a child in their life, is truly misguided and shelfish. Children come to homes all the time, selling Girl Scout cookies, Boy Scuts selling popcorn.
My father was a mailman and came up to the door, a German Shepard dog went through the door, knocked him down and attacked him — He was working and doing his job. In this case, the choice of keeping the dog alive was out of the owners control and thankfully the court made the correct decision.
Yes, I can understand they have to make the decision, but please do more to explain what damage those animals can do, and if need be, be graphic about it, no one should have to bear scars from that animal because they won’t put it down because they can’t/won’t make that decsion.
Kim K says
Perhaps because I have suffered from severe depression that has finally, in my 60’s been brought under control, I know that mental illness is as much a disease as any physical illness. So you cannot say a fear aggressive or otherwise behaviorally compromised dog is an “otherwise healthy” dog when making decisions. I am not being facetious, but would you say that a dog with advanced cancer is “otherwise healthy.” I, too, have had to make the devastating decision to put a beloved pet ”
To sleep” because of uncontrollable fear aggression. He loved me,
Loved my husband, but if a stranger approached, he panicked (I knew him so well I could see the change in his eyes). I kept him confined to the house and yard, but one day some workmen bypassed a padlock, opened a gate, and he got out and bit a friend of a neighbor. We live on a cul de sac with children. I realized that there was no 100% way of keeping him contained. What if there was a fire in the house and the firemen left the front door open? He was the best trained dog I ever had, but even the training which exposed him to meeting strangers (at a distance) was oh so difficult for him. So he was euthanized. It put the Devils in his head to rest. As I started out saying, mental illness is as”painful” as physical illness. The torment of wanting to kill yourself when you have children and you know they would NOT be better off without you….being not just afraid, but terrified and paralyzed at the thought of leaving your house when you know there is no reason to fear…at least Quinn didn’t have to face his debilitating fears any more. He was at peace. Understanding this made it easier, but still one of the hardest things I ever did. But at least it modified the guilt because I knew “otherwise healthy” didn’t cut it.
Nic1 says
Like LisaW, I considered not saying anything else but I have reread some posts on here in more detail and I wonder whether some people who set themselves up as dog trainers and behaviourist and insist they can work with aggressive dogs actually have any appropriate education? I have also read a nod to Cesar on this blog post which i have to confess, raised my own hackles, just a little. 🙂
So, this is a post addressing training philosophy with regard to aggression.
I do fear for the safety of people and dogs who choose a trainer who says:
‘growling is not aggression’.
Yes it is. It absolutely is aggression.
As i understand, Trisha defined the type of aggression specifically,for the context of this blog post only, as injurious bites to another human being.
However, as i also understand, aggressive behaviour is on a scale and it is normal canine behaviour. It ranges from growls, stares and agonistic or ritualised behaviour to attacks and injurious bites, the latter being the focus in this blog post. People don’t recognise the early warning signals sometimes (stares, mini freezes, flattened ears etc.) but heck, if my dog was increasingly GROWLING at kids for example, I would be thinking about immediately starting a treatment programme for aggression based on a training toolkit based on de-sensitisation and counter conditioning.
Otherwise, do I really wait until she bites a child to start the treatment program because she hasn’t shown any ‘aggression’ until she has no choice but to bite??
Not once throughout any aggression treatment process would I ever consider that showing my dog less affection or kicking her off the sofa would cure her of aggression around kids. Neither would i be considering that she has the cognitive ability to apply these ‘rules’, that apparently enforce my leadership status in the ‘pack’, ( all the while i am pretending to be a type A personality) into a completely different context in the future. These are the true mixed messages I would argue.
Trisha posted on another blog post that when she started out with dogs, she tried the rank reduction rules and found that it made some difference to a few dogs, no difference to most dogs and made some dogs much worse. If aggression is the issue, it needs to be clinically and behaviourally treated. People don’t need guilt trips about their own apparent behaviour when they have genuinely tried their absolute utmost best.
There is no such thing as a ‘positive only’ dog trainer either. Anyone who says that there is such a person, does not understand animal learning I would argue. Rewards and punishment are part of the process. However, not all punishment is acceptable. A line should be drawn at anything physical, such as Alpha rolls, scruff shakes, kicks in the ribs, holding a dog down by force, pulling it about on the lead, lead jerks, strangling a dog by stringing it up with a lead etc. and any emotional abuse, yelling, screaming stare downs etc. Rules are necessary as is consistency. Firmness can be appropriate, but brutality is never, ever justified. This will make an already aggressive dog worse and there is evidence that confrontational techniques elicit aggression in dogs. It will cause a relationship to break down as there is no safety or trust.
Some of the many brave people who have shared their stories here may also unfortunately feel shame about their dog’s aggression. I have felt shamed about my dog’s behaviour and like Kat, have lay awake fantasising that she would get ill and die and then I wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore (more shame on top of shame). It’s hideous. I would not wish it on anyone so the more posts I read on here, the more I wish I could help.
diane says
192 comments, and I come in just now. Thankfully with no first hand experience. Life is wonderful, but difficult at times.. there will always be victims whether human or canine. You can only try your best….but we must all keep learning so our decisions are founded. Thanks for the posts and honesty.
cindy perry says
I face the same decision in ten days I do not want to do it but probably will have to and am crushed
Sharon T says
I, unfortunately, have been this situation. He was fine with me, but unless you were on his “A” list (which was extremely short) he was unpredictable. I worked with a trainer but was unable to change his behavior. I wasn’t willing to risk injury or worse to anyone else and chose to put him to sleep. My regular vet never questioned my decision to euthanize him.
Ellen says
Nici – “Dogs don’t generally live in packs with strange dogs unless we force them too.”
Do you believe that feral dog packs are made up of only familiar dogs, and who forced them to live together? The dogs were only strangers until they started to run and hunt together. They form a pack for survival because they know that remaining individual is not secure or natural for survival. Are you aware of the problem in places like Detroit? Dogs are pack animals.
You can read all the studies you want, but I’ll stick with the folks who work hands on with packs of dogs on a daily basis and actually know their language, their needs and what true aggression/predatory behavior is, and trust their absolute opinion on whether a dog can be saved or not. Reading books on why they think they’ve mislabeled wolf pack behavior is not going to save my dog who is staring at me and snarling, and might have already taken a chunk out of someone, killed the family cat, and maybe even another family dog..
My experiences with clients and case studies are based upon medical clearance and purely behavioral in origin. I am neither judging nor belittling anyone who has made this difficult decision to put their dog down, or making it simplistic. We take all of these instances very seriously for everyone involved. I am just pointing out some of the issues that beget some of the most obnoxious behavior that can turn aggressive are indeed the result of too many privileges, including affection, and not enough direction or leadership.
You and another commenter misunderstood what I meant about the dog on the couch. She is already attacking – that privilege should be taken away for the moment and until this dog does not respond with snarky or aggressive behavior. I never said that allowing dogs on a couch provoked aggression, but you can develop an issue if that’s the first thing you allowed her to do when she came into your home. If you have no problem removing your dog from any furniture, then you have a good relationship. If your dog growls, snaps, bares teeth or gives you whale eye about it, then you have an issue and she should not be allowed on any furniture, and leadership exercises should be implemented and practiced.
Take from it what you’d like. Once again I am saying that I am enlightening people of the fact that there is much help available today. I also said that while many people cannot afford this help, many people can and are willing to spend thousands at Tufts instead of a natural, down and dirty behaviorist – many times because they are unaware of them because their vet and/or one trainer has not informed them of such people or have mentioned them in a less than promising way, sometimes inferring that this type of trainer will make the dog worse and you’re wasting your time and money (untrue).
And yes, you CAN love your dog too much with constant unearned affection, treats, freedom to do whatever they like whenever they like to do it. That emotion satisfies the human, but does nothing to communicate security, guidance and direction for your dog. In fact, it can do the opposite, and the call we get many times after the dog has taken over the household and is holding everyone at bay (hostage) – won’t get off beds or furniture when told, won’t give up a toy or food, snaps at people to keep them away, etc. We need to balance both consistent and fair leadership and affection with our dogs in order to give them the best opportunity to be the best dogs.
Nic1 says
Ellen,
When did any ‘professional’ disregard education and continuing educational development!? No dog trainer has ever said, ‘my training has really suffered since I understood the science.’ Ever. Except when the science and the evidence inconveniently compounds their own thinking. You are twisting theories to suit your own opinions.
Those links I posted were to two of the most respected people in their fields. David Mech being the guy who more or less retracted his original research on wolves because he later realised that that his research was seriously flawed and tragically it was then taken out of context and misapplied in dog training and behaviour. He was concerned about that misapplication from a welfare perspective. You may want to check that out….
As for the vast majority of your other comments, probably better to agree to disagree. I would recommend you read Trisha’s books btw.
LisaW says
Ellen,
You stated: “And yes, you CAN love your dog too much with constant unearned affection, treats, freedom to do whatever they like whenever they like to do it. That emotion satisfies the human, but does nothing to communicate security, guidance and direction for your dog. In fact, it can do the opposite, and the call we get many times after the dog has taken over the household and is holding everyone at bay (hostage) – won’t get off beds or furniture when told, won’t give up a toy or food, snaps at people to keep them away, etc. We need to balance both consistent and fair leadership and affection with our dogs in order to give them the best opportunity to be the best dogs.”
You clearly have linked the two — love and affection with a dog taking over the household — and while I am not sure what’s satisfying about that for the human, I do think it’s an approach that doesn’t seem to leave a lot of room for context or growth for either the human or the dog. For example, there is the Nothing in Life is Free approach and the Everything in Life is Free approach. The latter does not advocate for pure chaos because the human is satisfying themselves by giving affection to the dog. (My dog actually asks to be cuddled or scratched or petted sometimes, which I think is satisfying to her as well.) Rather it is about building a relationship around mutual trust, agreement, affection, and yes, boundaries but without the human as withholder. It’s more of a compact or accord. It’s also a commitment and hard work on both sides. To me, love doesn’t have a negative connotation and for our household (human and animal) to live, work, play together — warts and all — there sure better be a whole lotta love.
The behaviorists and trainers I have worked with (and others I have read) are more than happy to offer their approach, describe their plan, and make recommendations without any negative comparisons. Ultimately, it’s up to the client what road map they think will work best and that decision is best made without the derision.
Nic1 says
‘Dogs are taking over the household because they sleep on the the sofa and bed’. My dogs wants to sleep on the sofa or bed because it is more comfortable than the floor. Comfort is self reinforcing. My dog doesn’t go to sleep on the coffee table. It’s not comfortable. Dogs don’t recognise sofa time as a ‘human privilege’ either. The sofa issue is more about resource guarding or location guarding. That, like aggression, can be treated too, using desensitisation and counter conditioning. Ensuring that you have trained the dog with a cue to get on and off the furniture when you ask and provide plenty of comfortable resting places for your dog in the first place, should help with any unnecessary escalation of location guarding issues. Access to comfortable resting places does not equal taking over the house. What if the dog has musculoskeletal pain? Are you going to deny it a place on the sofa in casse it abuses the privilege? Reward the behaviour you like, ignore or manage what you don’t like.
Why people insist that dogs are taking over the household when they are simply trying to control their own lives is concerning. We are the species that have smart phones; drive vehicles to the store to buy the dog food; possess the opposable thumbs to open the tins of dog food with the complex tools we created for that task; possess the monkey brains that figured the maths to put men on the moon and for the love of God, choose whether our dogs live or die (as per blogpost). Really, is your dog taking over?
Let’s give dogs (and their owners) a break……You can misuse food and over feed dogs for sure. You can fail to teach dogs to make alternative appropriate choices, humanely and effectively. That is not necessarily the definition of loving dogs though is it? It’s over feeding and not setting bounderies, teaching or being consistent. Being a secure attachment figure, like a great loving and benevolet parent is really what we should be advocating for our dogs. Also, understanding how dogs learn (operant and classical conditioning). That’s more like real love IMO.
Aggression is context specific and is most often based in fear. Why working with packs of dogs is relevant here is beyond any logic I can reasonably see when they share their lives with us in our homes in a human society.
Nic1 says
February 2015. http://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0118375
Separation Related Disorders (SRD) in Dogs.
Occurs in some dogs when the owner is absent or when the dog is forbidden access to the owner.
‘We found that with owners’ higher score on attachment avoidance the occurrence of SRD in the dog increases. Our results suggest that owners’ attachment avoidance may facilitate the development of SRD in dogs. We assume that avoidant owners are less responsive to the dog’s needs and do not provide a secure base for the dog when needed.’
‘We suppose that owners’ attachment style influences their caregiving behaviour toward the dog: they may show a less consistent responsiveness to the dog’s needs. Owners with insecure-avoidant attachment style avoid intimate contacts, closeness and affection and it is possible that they behave in this way not only in their interpersonal relationships but also toward their dogs. Dogs who meet refusal or ignorance of their needs (e.g. need for contact) can learn that they cannot be sure about the availability of the owner.’ They can become insecure.
Interesting paper – haven’t really looked at methodology yet. Having a secure attachment figure is central to instilling emotional stability in both dogs and children. Needing contact, for some dogs, is integral to their emotional well being.
Trisha says
So many fascinating comments, thank you all so much for contributing. However, I am going to stop posting comments debating different methodologies for treating serious behavior problems in dog on this particular post. Not because it’s not an important topic–it is. And not because I don’t welcome a variety of viewpoints–I do. And not because I don’t appreciate everyone’s contributions–I do very, very much. But I don’t think this is the place to have a discussion about methodologies. I wrote this piece to give people a list of considerations that might help them if faced with a difficult decision in the future, and with compassion for those who have already made it. Those are the issues I’d like this article to focus upon. With thanks to you all for continuing our conversation, and for (I hope) understanding my decision.
EmilySHS says
Leaving methodologies out of it raises exactly a point of wonder for me: observationally, I’ve found over the years that one of the things that makes “these” dogs so very, very difficult and potentially dangerous is that they just don’t seem to respond to any of the usual attempts to treat them. A plan that works like bread-and-butter for a whole lot of dogs with similar-appearing issues lands with a thud and no progress, or it looks like progress on Tuesday and back to square one on Wednesday. I work with hundreds of shelter and private practice dogs yearly, and most of them with issues, if the execution and management are sound, really do get somewhere–not “cured,” but improved enough. Then, there’s that fraction that just don’t. The owners (or us) really do “try everything” and the approaches have proven track records of success and are appropriately executed and it’s still an Epic Fail… or such slow, arduous progress that resources are exhausted before enough change can be made.
Failure to respond has for me become almost a tell for many of these dogs that there must be more afoot than a crummy puppy hood or a single traumatic incident…? We see loads of crummy puppy hoods and traumas that do respond and aren’t dangerous. Truly, seriously, deeply dangerous dogs are so rare: if the underlying causes were ordinary and/or common, wouldn’t we see a whole lot more of them?
The hardest dogs I have to deal with aren’t constantly raving “lunatics” (or they’d have been euthanized long before I saw them as adults) and they aren’t without wonderful qualities–a lot or most of the time smart, funny, affectionate, sweet. If they weren’t in some way so very good so much of the time, the decision to throw in the towel wouldn’t be so danged painful and hard. They feel like angels and demons all rolled into one, and which one do we get today? So hard to give up on the angel and so hard to live with the demon, at the shelter they catch me coming and going, beating my head against the nearest wall trying to make a decision I don’t want to make.
In the end, the best guidelines I’ve been able to find are 1) worst case scenarios: if there’s a mistake or an unfortunate opportunity and the dog does his/her worst, can I (as a trainer) or we (as a shelter) live with the most likely predicted result? 2) Can an adopter genuinely enjoy and have a good relationship the dog exactly as he/she is now or with a little work using resources/abilities the adopter actually has? 3) Given the available resources, will the dog have quality of life? If the answer is no, no or no–no. Not fair to the community, not fair to the adopter and not fair to the dog.
Euthanasia counseling (and grief counseling) are two services we offer at the shelter; part of my job. Not my favorite part, but I always feel honored and privileged to have people share with me intimacies of their bond with their dogs. Thanks so much to all the people who shared their stories above so honestly and beautifully and with so much love and compassion; it gives me insights to do that part of my job better. I would ask a question, though, if anyone has it in their heart to answer: What would it take to resolve the guilt for you? If I had a wish for the people I talk to, it would be to leave our conversation in some place of peace, knowing in their hearts that whatever decision they make, they gave it every try, every thought, every chance they could.
Mireille says
@EmilySHS
Wonderful and thougtfull post. It makes a point that I was discussing with a deear dog-friend. We call it ‘the programmabiloty myth’. Without pointing to any training method in particular, I do feel sometimes that training methods sometimes promise too much. If you follow this program you will certainly get endresult X … Whereas dogs do not come as blanks, not even 8 week old puppy’s, they are ‘pre drawn blueprints’ and we can try to steer and mold, but we cannot ‘(re)build from scratch’. Many dogs have their limitations. My Siberian Spot cannot be trusted around deer, rabbits and other small things running, including small dogs. I knew that was a probability in a siberian, yet I thought that ‘maybe with the right amount of training’ Yeah.. Right…. Nope, I can’t. Brother Shadow is much easier to distract. It really was an eye opener for me, raising two littermates, how different they respond to the same training.
Getting back to dogs that are agressive to humans; I guess that sometimes dogs might be so hardwired to a certain way of responding, that no amount of training can change that. And maybe that would ease the guilt; it’s not the owners that did something wrong. It’s a limitation within the dog, a boundary to trainability. And then you choose how much risk you wan’t to take and how much responsibility you can take on. I personally think the latter is underestimated, having a potentially dangerous dog on you hands, being to either humans or other animals, is stressing. To be very frank; there have been times that I thought of my dogs ‘if they were dead, life would be easier’. And that is not because I do not love them. It’s because it’s stressing, constantly being on the lookout for potential prey (cat’s lurking in doorways, very small dogs bouding past’ slow rabbits, sitting ducks… Being dragges into a ditch because they saw a dear.., )
In Dutch we have a word that I can’t properly translate… Literally it would be ‘un-caring’ but not the literal sense; taking away the care, maybe ‘un-worrying’ would be a better term. The relief after the beloved dog has been put down, is not because the owner was ‘un-loving’ it’s the relief of ‘un-worrying’
Carol says
Good article and one I can relate to currently being in the position of should I shouldn’t I put one of my dogs down. As a pup he had several fits that no one could ever find the cause off, he is a loving, playful dog but turns so easily for no reason (that we can work out) and has inflicted several injuries on one of our other dogs. We currently manage the problem by use of a lead and a muzzle but is a constant 24 hour guard duty and the does take it’s toll having to be constantly on watch. We can recognize his body language that spells trouble and then act accordingly but it is taking its toll on the quality of life our other dogs are having. I would not rehome him as I do not trust him and it is a risk I would not take, but for all his aggressiveness he is a beautiful dog, big decision to make and not one I want to rush or make, but being his ownerI have to.
Pauline says
Had to have one of my two dogs put down last night through aggression. He was a beautiful chocolate brown Cocker Spaniel. He would have been six in August. I feel utterly sick but he has bitten me twice and my husband four times during that time, the last being last night, the previous a year ago so we thought he’d turned a corner, especially when we got a rescue dog two and a half years ago which seemed to calm him a little. He would growl at the slightest thing and we were always wary around him. My husband was hysterical when he got bit (he suffered a stroke a few years ago and he can overreact sometimes) and I instantly knew what had happened and was devastated as I knew I had no choice but to have him put to sleep. It was the hardest decision I made in my life and miss him already. How I found the strength to ring the vet and get him in the car I don’t know. I was with him the whole time until his last breath and I think my heart broke there and then. He fought the whole time and had to have two top up injections, enough to fell a small horse, but he had been sedated first and we were told he was in a deep sleep when the overdose went in.
He was such a character and we tried really hard but felt we couldn’t rehome him because of his issues. We believe he perhaps suffered some brain damage as a puppy when someone left the gate open and he charged out and hit the side of a car. He was also attacked when he was 8 months old by a deer hound and I think both of these “turned” his brain a little bit. When he was in his affectionate stage you couldn’t ask for a better dog but when he wasn’t getting his own way or we offered him affection without being asked for it, it was watch out.
It’s the most difficult decision I have ever had to make and we gave him so many chances and tried really hard, including an experienced dog trainer and behaviourist very early on. I now face a future without my pal and constant companion but having our other dog helps. I wonder if it was our fault he was the way he was and I know we have to take some of the responsibility hence it was our decision in the end, but our other rescue dog who we’ve had for two and a half years since he was seven months old is completely different and totally trustworthy and that hasn’t changed. Sorry if my typing isn’t very good but can’t stop crying.
tlackinger@yahoo.com says
I am glad to have found your article. It has helped me a great deal in the decision to make my next move regarding my pup. I have no thought in my head to euthanize my dog due to his aggressive behavior and it turned me off when I read on a few local trainer sites that euthanizing could be the end result regarding aggression. I was floored and thought I could never deal with a trainer that offered that as an end result. So, I searched the idea to understand more why it would even be mentioned. I understand now the very extreme cases that could be why it is mentioned and feel more comfortable contacting a trainer for help. I have a rescue from the streets that was so malnourished you could see the ridges in his rib bones. He’s my heart. He’s a joy. He is so playful and loving. Until bed time. Something when he gets tired and is sleepy turns him into a different pup. He lunges and attacks at nothing in the night air and sadly sometimes my husband or I get in the way and get bit. We know it is from some fear but are at a loss as to how to help him. We are dedicated to helping him but are just too ignorant as to how… so…. in comes the search for a trainer. Again, thank you for addressing the issue and helping us to see why this may be offered in some situations.
HELEN LAMONT says
I am glad to have found your website with the powerful reminder that love is not enough.I have learned today that a terrier that I adopted from a re-homing center was euthanized some months after I returned her to the center. She had been in my care for almost 3 years having lived in the center for 1 year previously. She was maltreated as a younger dog and used for baiting. The original owners were convicted in court of her abuse and neglect.
As an inexperienced owner who had no gradual introduction to the dog I sought the advice of 2 trainers re signs of unpredictable behavior towards young men. She would leap and ‘nip’ a hand. The behavior began to escalate not helped by her being attacked and bitten by another dog when I was thrown to the ground. The vet who provided for her care advised me to return her to the re-homing center. On return to the center her aggression escalated with biting without obvious reason and the decision was made to euthanize her as she could not be re-homed.
When in my home she felt secure in her cage and my small garden. I live in a city and was warned never to let her run free. I feel so very sad about the outcome and regret that my optimism overruled my ordinarily cautious approach to sentient beings. I am glad that for a short time she was able to relax and enjoy the sun and long walks. Although friends tell me I did all that I could I feel guilty about the times I could have been more patient with her. In a way it is a relief to know that she is free from the huge anxiety that she lived with and the prospect of being caged for hours at a time.
Michelle says
Thank you all for your comments. Early this afternoon I will be euthanising my whippet/staffy x. He was brought impulsively when I was picking up the ashes of my black lab who died at 10. He is only 13 mths old and I have lived in denial that things were this bad. He has never bitten any human although has gotten fear aggressive when the vets tried to shove him in a cage while awaiting to be castrated. He does however attack our 9mth old Rhodesian ridgeback at least once a month. The last attack was so bad that it took3 people to break it up. Most of the time the dogs are great friends but every now and then he seems to flip a switch and without warning or provocation he attacks. He has attacked 3 cats and our RR has needed vet treatment almost everytime.
I have worked closely with a behaviourst and he’s been to obedience training since he was 5 mths old. We have spent almost a year trying to improve his behaviour. For weeks he is great then he flips. I have been told by 4 different vets and our original behaviourist that he won’t change and unless I keep them seperate for the rest if their lives there is nothing more that can be done. Out if desperation I contacted another behaviourist who when I rang him in tears after the last and most viscous attack basically said dog owners like me make him sick as we have no idea what we’re doing. I asked him why I have had many dogs before who were so different and he stated it was sheer fluke. Nice to hear when your at your lowest and desperate for help.
I do not want to euthanise my dog as he isvery clever and loves to snuggle in for cuddles but I cannot risk my other animals. The vet told me the next attack will be fatal as so much damage was caused less than a week ago in the last attack. The attacks are getting more and more frequent too with5 attacks in less than 3 weeks. In NZ there is no support for those with dogs like these, we are all classed as terrible owners who they cannot understand why haven’t put the dog to sleep. Even my family are very judgemental. Thank goodness for a site like this, I’m so glad I’m no longer alone in this as I honestly thought I was a terrible owner and seriously have been put off ever owning dogs again.
Today will be harder than having to put my old sick dogs down and we lost both in less than 12 mths so I don’t want to relive that, but there is no other choice. Go and play with Jack and Chloe my Rex. Please know that I love you so much and wish things could have been so different. Please forgive me for failing you and I wish you could’ve stayed. love mum xxx
Trisha says
Michelle: I wish I could answer all the posts on this thread, but I can say this to you: You didn’t fail your dog. Honestly. There are all kinds of ways that we can fail our dogs, but this is not one of them. Your dog appears to have a fatal, untreatable illness, that is putting others at risk of their very lives. The kindest thing you can do is just what you are doing, being strong enough to let your heart break while you do what is right. I am so very, very sorry that you are going through this. But you are not alone, you are not a terrible owner–look how hard you have tried to turn things around. Take care of yourself, and remember that grief is recorded in your brain as the same thing as physical pain. Treat yourself as if you’ve just had surgery, because in a way, you have.
Michelle says
Thanks so much for your kind words. They mean a lot. He was fear aggressive right to the end yesterday and even had to wear his muzzle while they euthanised him. That cemented the fact that I had done the right thing. I love him dearly and I miss him so much. Even our RR seems to be pinning for him.
Your website is a wonderful support thank you so much for sharing your stories as I thought I was so alone. It really is the hardest decision to have to make but I really do understand what is meant by a sense of relief too. It’s such a shame that it comes at such a cost.
cindy reid says
Thank you for this article; the information validates my very difficult decision to euthanize my 3 year old dog for aggression after she killed my smaller dog. Before making that decision, I met with my vet and considered all of our options, but, in the end, I knew that I could not live with myself if she killed another dog. My question now is how do I move on from this? It has been 10 months and I still grieve daily for both dogs.
Karen King says
My stepdaughter’s and her 10 year old Yorkie were visiting last night and the dog has always been a joy. The dog was in my daughter’s arms and I put my face near the dog and said what a cute dog you are( something we all have done). The dog lunged at me and bite my nose. My husband took me to the clinic and gave a shot and prescription for antibiotics. I feel victimized.
The emotional issues are multi-layered, but from a victim’s point of view, I never want the dog in my presence again.
Anna says
Ok so this happened to me on Monday 31st May 2015, my heart is broken, I feel so guilty, my house is quiet, but I know deep in my heart I did the right thing. I rescued a little Jack Russell who I named Eddie last year from a dogs home. When I first got him I knew he was dog aggressive he was not neutered. I must also point out I have a greyhound who we took with us to make sure they would be compatible. On bringing him home I also discovered he was ball obsessive, initially food obsessive and he had a fascination with water beyond anything I have ever seen before. I took him to a trainer to help me lead train etc which helped. Ok so then for the first time he attacked me just purely for stroking him I thought not knowing if he had been mistreated before I let it go. I had him neutered and this calmed him down loads, he became more obedient and learned quickly. Then it happened for a 2nd time he bit and drew blood really badly it nearly made me pass out I think from the shock. I decided to take him back to the rehoming shelter, but after a day we missed him so much and I hate to fail so we got him back and all was going really well with training and his personality was changing and he was a pleasure to have around. Then on Monday my husband was stroking him under his neck (which normally didn’t bother Eddie) and I heard screaming and Eddie was attacking my husband. I had let it go twice but my husband has not long got over heart failure from last August and we made the toughest decision ever, we could never trust Eddie again after 3 times of forgiving him for biting also he could never come off his lead as he was dog aggressive so he never really got to enjoy life, so I took him to the vet and asked him to put him to sleep, he was only nearly 3 years old and most of the time made me laugh with his antics. I knew I couldn’t take him back to rehoming shelter, because god forbid the next family he hurt a child I would never forgive myself.
Susan says
I have always been a dog lover, I am also a dog owner (and I have had 10 dogs in my life) have participated in dig rescue, have rescued several dogs and have had three dogs certified as therapy dogs.
I say all this because I am not as much of a dog lover as I was. Many of my neighbors have unruly and aggressive dogs. It is stressful and unpleasant to deal with most of the time, but on two occasions I have been so intimidated by the dogs that I had to stop gong out in the neighborhood (decreasing my own dogs pleasure). Interestingly most people defend the dogs, their rights and behavior. I disagree. If a human were to behave the way that’s dogs do the would be incarcerated. I know of teens who have done much less in Juvenal hall and adults in jail.
When did dogs rights become more important than human rights?
I know euthanasia is a very difficult decision, and I do think efforts can be made to rehabilitate with a good trainer and medication. But it is confusing to me that so much time, energy and resources are being put into dogs that create fear or are dangerous to people and other dog when millions of dogs are euthanized in this country annually….. And I’m guessing most of them are good natured, sweet dogs.
Michael says
This article has helped my grieving. Just this weekend we put down our Jack Russel mix. He was 7 years old and we loved him dearly. He bit my daughter then bit 3 other people within a week. He changed dramatically over the last year. He was always a playful fun dog up to then. We have a baby girl that is 5 months old. Fear came over us about our baby. I have been in tears. I never want to feel this again and I am in the middle of grieving as I write this. Thank you all for the posts. This post helped me the most out of all sites I have read with regards to our situation. Thank you.
Mona says
We have a 10 year old border collie. We have dealt with her fear aggression problems through professional training, conditioning, and exercise throughout her life. We have accepted that there are situations (i.e. children visiting our house) where she needs to be put in a safe, comfortable room away from whatever sets her off. Now that she is aging, she is becoming more aggressive. In the past month, she has lashed out at my husband and me with no warning. I have even noticed her start to snarl when I wipe her wet feet and had to order her to “settle”. She obeyed, but I’m concerned that she could bite me in the face or neck while I am working so close to her bite. My husband thinks it may be time to put her down. It breaks my heart to hear this, but I also want to be a responsible pet owner. Can you advise?
Trisha says
Mona: Pain is a common cause of aggression in older dogs, and happens a lot in Border Collies who tend to abuse their bodies when they are young. I’d go both to my regular vet and a good canine chiropractor if you can. Good luck!
Rich Beaudry says
Thank you so much for writing this particular article. I have owned more than 20 dogs over the last 41 years and, unfortunately, I have far too much tragedy to remember along with all those wonderful dogs. But the ones that hurt most and still bring tears are the few that I had to put down for aggressive reasons. With help from great vets, breeders and rescuers, I was able to make the right decisions. But the doubt, the “what if”, never really stops. Your post has helped me deal with it — to see more clearly what the reasons were behind those euthanize decisions that I made.
Kiska was the worst situation. A beautiful one year old Alaskan Malamute who I took in and tried to rehabilitate rather than leave her to be euthanized by her breeder. Although our time together was only a few weeks, we somehow shared a bond that was unbreakable — talk about hugging with her eyes! But her history, her vicious attacks on other dogs including my 3-year old female, and the potential for problems with my very young grandsons turned out to be too much risk. She was my third Malamute (one died early from a heart defect and I also kept her brother for 7 years before bloat took him while at my vets’), but other than my current 8 year old Affenpinscher, I have never had such a deep emotional attachment. It’s been 15 years, but I will never truly get over her.
Again, my thanks for bringing a clearer understanding to me.
Lisa says
Thank you for writing this article. It has helped me a lot. I will be euthanizing my aggressive dog tonight or tomorrow night. She has never tried to attack me or my husband but we have 3 other dogs and she has put one of them in the hospital for 3 nights, she bit our other other dog because she got excited when she saw my mom coming to the door, she has most recently been growling at my 7 month old daughter, and she bit someone on the back of the leg and broke skin last weekend. I have managed the aggression by keeping her separated everytime I leave the house. I have done lots of positive training with her and exercise her regularly. I just feel like the aggression is a part of who she is and she will only get worse from here.
The saddest part of this is that she is so sweet with me. I have referred to her on many occasions as my dog soulmate! She was feral when I got her and she has come so far in trusting and wanting to be around people. But, the more confident she gets the more aggressive she becomes. The more she practices biting, the more comfortable she has become in defaulting to that reaction. I feel like I have failed her and I don’t think I will ever forgive myself. I am heart broken 🙁
Merna says
After reading all of the comments I know now I have no choice but to put my 10 year old border collie down. He first started biting when he was about 2. The first one was a little girl and I should have done it then. Over the years he has bitten quite a few people. I have to keep him away from people. He has never bitten me or my kids but I had my grandson and he looked through the screen door and showed his teeth. My grandson is autistic and only 3. I keep him away from the dog but I may not always be able to protect him. My dog can not be ‘re homed as he would never take to a new owner. He has attacked other dogs also. I cannot jeopardize the safety of my grandson others. This is breaking my heart but I feel like I have no other choice.
mollianne cross says
I have two dogs who get along fine most of the time. Once in a while Olivia will attack princess out of jealousy or protection. When she attacks the fight doesn’t stop until we break it apart. In the process of breaking them up i have had my face bit, and this time breaking up the fight my finger got bit. Princess got a little tore up but olivia is alright. once when i was sleeping with olivia in my bed someone came to wake me up and she bit the girls face and left the girl in bad shape but no sticthces. She doesn’t do well around little baby kids and surely doesn’t get along with other animals. I can’t take olive for a walk anywhere in fear she will hurt another animal. For the most part though princess and olivia get along and love each other but once in a while they fight, bad. I’m scared for princesses life and the lawsuits i might face if she harms another animal. I don’t want to put her to sleep i love her so much and ive never had a dog that loved me as much as i love her. Im just afraid that i’m being selfish. I just need to know what to do and if the aggression will ever stop. Shes a 80 pound dog so dominates the fights. Please just guide me and be brutually honest. i need to know what to do!
Millie says
I came across this article when looking for help. We lost my mum 3 months ago and since then her dog has been very aggressive to my daughters friends. He is not aggressive to anyone else just her friends. She is 9 and they got the dog when she was small so he has been around kids for many years but has become very aggressive, and you can almost see he is waiting to be alone with them and then starts growling and snarling and has nipped a few now. We are terrified he will really hurt someone and dad is talking about euthanizing him. Please help!!
Mommadukes says
I am at this decision right now with my dog who I rescued when she was about 6 months old. I could tell she didn’t have a good start in life nor was she ever socialized. With time and patience she warmed up to my other rescue, who is quite an amazing dog. As she grew toward adult age she become for anxious about the outside world and more dog aggressive. I hired an experienced trainer and spent quite a bit of money. The instigating of fights from her side with my other pitbull rescue are increasing and infact even more so since she returned from the 3 weeks of training. She does very well with people but she sees red when it comes to other animals and when she snaps we don’t know when its going to happen. This past weekend my husband and I were sitting on the couch and I was tickling him, she came over to join in the fun and when Blue jumped over she turned vicously on him. I made the mistake of trying to separate them with my leg – yes, very stupid reaction – and I was bitten by here in the calf – she’s 100 lbs so you can imagine the bite. She is unpredictable and dangerous mostly to Blue. I don’t think she meant to bite me – she sulked in her crate. I am facing a very difficult decision – she’s my baby girl and I love her so very much and I know what I think I should do – it’s just breaking my heart more than anyone could possible know. I am glad it was my leg instead of my Blue getting hurt because it would have ended up like a bloodbath with too pitbulls at each other. I haven’t said anything to my family, my sons, we already had to put our Dog of 10 years down because he was ill a couple years ago. I am just beside myself right now. She doesn’t leave me side, I work at home and she stays right beside me. I feel like I’ve let her down, I failed her. 🙁
Tina says
A subject that is so fresh to me……
Just a few days ago i made the decision to end my dogs life…. The heartache and guilt
I feel is horrendous. The bottom line is i had to keep my children safe in their own home.
My sharpei was 4 years old. We had him as part of the family from 10 weeks old. We have found it very hard to live with him and his behaviour issues but stuck at it until last week when he bit my 4 yr old. Just a few weeks ago he also bit a delivery driver. There was no way we could live with him or rehome him. I just hope one day i will forgive myself :(((
Appenheimer says
Thank you.
Tonya says
It has been recommended by our vet, our dog trainer and a rescue friend to make this difficult decision. For 5.5 years we have thwarted/intervened in situations that could have been terrible. This week an unprovoked attack on our smaller dog with intent to kill, ended with me attempting a separation and receiving a superficial bite and another attack to my smaller dog. Instead of improving she has increasingly gotten more dangerous around any other animal, snarled/snapped at one of my kids and lunged at a friend with intent to bite (Thankfully, I was able to intervene). She has attacked and severely injured two other dogs in the past. At 8 months old we had a vet advice us euthanize her….I opted for behavioral training, our trainer also warned that Baili had hardwire issues and would never really be whole and we may face this decision. I felt that I could prove the first vet and trainer wrong, that I could prevent and help my precious puppy overcome this. I failed. Almost always our girl is sweet, loving, silly, fun, adorable and wonderful….almost always. She would gladly lay down her life protecting my girls or me. She is loyal, beautiful, athletic and sweet. I had hoped there was a physical reason for the increased aggression and prey drive. There is none more than a hardwiring issue in her brain. We have an appointment next week to say goodbye to her and I have no idea how I will go through with it. I do feel incredibly guilty, like a betrayal of the worst kind. I am her everything, she would never ever think I would do anything to harm her yet I am making the decision to end her life. I will miss her everyday. I will question this decision for the rest of my life. I will always love my beautiful broken girl!
Cathy Panus says
I once got in the middle of my two spayed females fighting. I got severely bit on the hand and required approx. 8 months of physical care. First strong oral antibiotics which didn’t work. I apparently am an expert at wound closure because by the time I went to the dr. my exterior hand wounds were closed tightly. But they were red and hot. I stupidly thought since my dogs were both up to date on their shots I was “okay”. From there I went to a hand surgeon and disease expert. I had several MRI’s, and had to do home IV’s every 6 hours for about 10 or so weeks. Home IV machine, picc line, weekly deliveries of home IV meds. — the works! I was afraid if I reported it right away, one or both my dogs would be taken from me and put down. So I tried to deal with it myself. I still don’t know what the ‘rules’ are in my state regarding this circumstance. (Not easy to find the ‘rules’) This was after my “Cujo” dog. Who at least never required medical intervention. We’ve taken one of my ‘fighting females’ to obedience classes and have followed her book since then with ALL new dogs we’ve had. But still problems. One big question I have for you is : My vet has told us the best scenario for having 2 dogs is 1 spayed female and 1 neutered male. Which we now have but there are still skirmishes, though not severe, if we head it off at the pass so to speak. What is your opinion?
Karta says
Thank you for this article. I read it in the waiting room of my vet while wrestling with the hard decision to put my dog down. As hard as it is I made the right choice and left her there. The safety of my children is more important and if I had chose to keep her and something happened I would never forgive myself.
Trisha says
Cathy: Your vet is correct that spayed/neutered male-female combos have the least likliehood of being aggressive toward each other. However, that’s a probability statement–if you compare 100 male/female pairs with 100 same sex pairs, there will be less fighting in the pair with mixed sexes. But that says nothing about the behavior of any ONE male and any ONE female. Personality is most important in my experience, followed by how they are trained and handled.
Good luck!
Lydia says
Thank you for this. Yesterday I made the hardest decision of my life. I asked my best friend and most loyal companion to load up one last time. 5 1/2 years ago he was literally headed toward the same fate on the day I rescued him from a friend of mine who had been unable to rehome him or take him to a breed rescue.
For the past 5 years he has made 4 steps to every single one of mine and has been my constant companion and protector. That was fine as a single woman. My husband has known him from day 1 and they have always vied for my affection, which I like to hope I doled out appropriately. 3 months ago I had a beautiful baby boy. Wiley has always been my protector, whether against the mail man or my nieces and nephews or even my husband when I was sick or upset. Three days ago a beautiful day turned dark when he bit my husband, totally unprovoked through the window of his truck as I stood right there holding our baby. None of us saw it coming- I thought he was way off in the field doing some important rodent hunting.
After many hours of agonizing soul searching I had to make to decision to let the best friend I’ve ever known go. He was a one person dog who, despite years of careful management, training and unconditional love, could not learn to share me with anyone else. I could not risk injury or worse to my child or the possibility of someone else getting hurt. I feel like a truck has run through the middle of me as he was physically fit from miles and miles of runs and walks and fetch session every day. He was mentally quick and so smart I often thought it would not have surprised me if he answered one of my million questions to him out loud.
I am playing the unhealthy “what if” game now in my mind. What if he would have protected and loved my son like he did me? What if my husband made some sort of gesture on that day that Wiley interpreted as harmful to me/ baby and was just doing as he has a hundred times before and put himself between me and the perceived threat? “What if” I just stole the most loyal and vibrant life because I was too stupid or lazy or ill equipped to handle this beautiful creature. But then I think… He had space, we live in the country…He had time (6 1/2 years) to accept other people and mellow…He had dedicated owners who made the effort to ensure he was never in a situation that would have ended badly for him or guests or baby…He was more loved than I can put into words and always treated with respect and happily. I cannot undo what we did yesterday, but I am trying to accept that every memory of him is happy (until yesterday) and we have a precious baby boy sleeping unharmed without his mommy being worried. Friends try to comfort me with that and the fact that the writing was on the wall and we did the right thing. As I write this, one foot off the couch reaching for the familiar warm fur to rub and black ear to twitch and brown eye to look expactantly back at me- it feels so wrong.
Beth says
We found a young black Lab cross on a highway through a desert in NM. Whether abandoned or thrown from a pickup truck we didn’t know. He had cacti stickers in his paws and muzzle. We gave him water and removed the stickers with the intention of taking him to the Human Society kennel the next day. Who knows what terrors he had endured or what the trauma had done to him? He loved the four of us who found him that day, and he lived with my daughter and her young son for several years. We saw at times that he had many fears. As another blogger wrote, something was just not quite right. He attacked the family’s Lab puppy, seriously biting through the roof of her mouth. He attacked my older Lab, making a hole in her jaw. Then he without any kind of provocation nipped a young boy in the side, breaking the skin. That was it. Love him though we did, he had to go. Who can absolutely guarantee that a dog will NEVER, ever bite again? Who can guarantee that a dog will positively for the rest of his life remain isolated from other dogs and other humans? And what kind of life is that anyway? My daughter grieved; he cuddled with her in her big chair every evening, gentle and sweet. We all grieved. Countless tears were shed before and after. The vet was not kind about it, but we knew what had to be done. No amount of training can guarantee that unknown terrors will be vanquished. They can snap in an instant. We still grieve for that dear boy. Our first responsibility, to sound cliche, is to be sure that our pets do no harm to others. Harsh as it may be, that’s the bottom line.
Pat W says
Many years ago I was at our local shelter looking for a new family member. I came across a cage with 10 puppies in it, marked PTS AM. Being a good friend of the local vet I asked if I could take them all home and personally take on the task of finding homes for them. My friend (vet) checked them all out, gave them their first shots and home we went. I lived in the country with a huge fenced yard and they had plenty of room to play. I was successful finding homes for 9 out of the 10. The tenth, Sadie …..sadly was PTS after many months of training and love.
We would work with her, love on her, and she would lovingly respond. Walk away from her and 10 minutes later she wouldn’t recognize you. It was then I was told that mental illness does exist in animals – just like humans. I’d never considered that before, ever, and felt naive for not seeing the probability.
Some issues may be environmental, mental, physical, emotional, survival, some may not. And though it is a ‘soul scorching’ decision (perfect phrase) not all can be saved. If we had let her go to another family she may have been abandoned or beaten for not behaving. We couldn’t allow that, so we set her spirit free. Will I ever forget Sadie, no, but better to let her go then let her be harmed.
Blessings to all who suffer with this sorrowful situation. I know it will never be easy.
Pam Green says
and just one more thing (as Columbo would say):
If your usual vet balks , perhaps because she doesn’t know you and/or the dog well enough, show the vet the medical reports on the previous bite or bites and/or show photographs, and/or statements from the bite recipient (if not yourself). If the bite recipient is willing to come to the vet with you, that can be irrebuttably convincing.
Of course ideally you have built up the kind of relationship with your vet that your vet knows how truely a heart-breaking last resort this is for you. though of course if your vet should have a diagnostic procedure to suggest to cover some really possible cause not yet ruled out, that may be something you will be willing to try as the next-to-last resort.
I live less than a dozen miles from the best vet school on the planet and over past 35 years have become well known there. So I do have vets who really respect my ethics and judgement. and who have helped me give extra good quality time to dogs with serious medical issues.
alternatively you may be able to get a euthanasia appointment at a local animal control shelter, again showing them the same evidence that I’ve suggested showing to a vet.. animal control people do know that a few dogs are just too dangerous for any sane person to keep. I had to do this once, and the shelter director knew me well enough.
Joyce D. says
My heart was broken when I landed here.
Thank you all so much.
Especially the original article, which set me free in so many ways, just by validating that this happens to good dog parents.
I loved my dog to the moon and stars. To infinity. I still do, but this is my first night without her next to me.
It’s like sitting in the bottom of a grave, to quote Hendrix.
Nobody does this for convenience.
Nobody who’s on the internet looking for peace, anyway
If you are reading this, you loved your dog so dearly.
Lay it down, if you can
The guilt.
And call it Love
Because that is what it is.
My dog was born to a stray, in a shelter, and she was adopted by a hoarder who kept her hidden away for eight months.
Add to that the fact that she was just not “wired right” as the vets and trainers said, and you can imagine the last two years of my life.
I celebrated her every accomplishment, and I never dreamed we wouldn’t make the distance.
But things can change in the blink of an eye, and long story short, I really had no choice, and am very lucky that the deciding factor was not a death or an unspeakable disfigurement.
My poor, poor dog. She was simply not made for this world.
But she tried so hard. She is my hero for ever.
Thank you all, for speaking so freely on such a difficult subject.
And thank you for the original article, where great empathy and wisdom lives.
I will read and re read it until I make it through the storm.
Thank you.
Jennifer says
I am living this nightmare right now. I so love my Ozzie, but he has bitten a second child. We have spent thousands on behaviorists, trainers, and veterinary costs to try and get him to a safer place in his own head. I know the warning signs of his aggression, but just one little miss and…. well he bit Again! I do not want him put down,but what do I do? I can’t guarantee anyone’s safety. I feel ill.
Tracy Smith says
I have 2 staffies who, since I have had them speyed, are not 2 friendly now with other dogs. I do keep my dogs on a lead when walking them. In response to your dog bites article on the internet, it would break my heart to euthanase my dogs should they ever bite anyone or another dog. However, my dogs have been socialised from day 1 of my having them, but should I find myself in the position where my dogs do bite anyone or another dog they would be mussled before I ever thought about euthanasure. My girls are my pets and companions. They are my pride and joy
Pip says
Where do I draw the line? My bullmastiff cross is nearly 2 and a powerful 38kg (83 pounds). Over time he’s become reactive to more and more strangers, human and canine, and now he reacts badly to nearly every human and dog he meets, but only strangers. Walking him is a nightmare and a head halter essential equipment. Of course people draw the line when a dog badly bites a family member or a child, rightly so. This dog loves kids and is completely darling around family members or friends. He has bitten strangers two times, when they were passing the house and he’d accidentally got out, but he didn’t break the skin. He’s attacked other dogs many times but rarely breaks the skin. So he’s a bully but is this “IT” (like in the original article) bad enough to be put down for? Is just the fear that he causes or the potential harm he possibly could cause, enough justification to take his life in the absence of having caused serious injury? I love my dog but I’m also exhausted by living with what feels like a time bomb that keeps ticking louder and louder, and I’m responsible for it.
Rich says
So I am on the eve of euthanize for my dog due to a severe behavioral issue- high aggression towards “strangers” or people entering my home. My 8 year old Beagle, deer friend of mine, and biggest worry of my life.
We have tried everything- you covered it all above. Realizing while I fed him dinner that this is the last time I will feed him made me break down. So here I am, on your site looking for reassurance that this is the right decision. I can make every excuse up in my mind to not do this, but I have to face the facts….thanks for the advice.
A says
Aggression is just a method of increasing distance between them and whatever is scaring them. Most aggression results when dogs stop using calming signals and resort to aggression instead because someone or dog didn’t listen to their calming signals in the past when they were feeling uncomfortable. Dogs can be rehabilitate it is just a question of how much time you will give the dog to recover and the effort your willing to put in. Fear aggression towards dogs and people can take over a year as progression is slow. However the problem will become less severe as you progress.
I own 2 rescue dogs which already had fear aggression issues towards dogs and people. I have made great progress in using the technique of manufacturing and rewarding distance increasing calming signals and calm behaviour around dogs and people. My dogs will use calming signals towards dogs and people to tell other dogs, me and people (if they know about dog body language) when they don’t want what’s scaring them to approach and can control the situation in a none aggressive manner. When my dogs use calming signals towards people while on a lead it delays the aggressive response so that I can reward the calming signal and then we move away. They are now starting to enjoy positive interactions with both dogs and people.
Aggression issues in dogs can be overcome so please people don’t give up on your dog.
Thomas W. says
we have a poodle w/ epilepsy – and a pitbull bassett mix – and the PB every so often attacks the poodle. We first thought it was food related as their both little piggies. The odd thing is they can walk by eachother and everything is fine – then snap. the attack is always at the poodles head and neck. This last time was pretty good puncture on her head and some soft tissue damage around the eye. One theory that has popped up from a vet and trainer is that the poodle could be exerting a smell or sign we are not picking up on during a controlled seizure and the pit is picking up on this and instinctually attacking. I tried to google this but found NOTHING. Has anyone heard of this. Currently the pit is out of the home as we are too afraid of another attack as we have two small dogs – although she has only attacked the poodle. Our only solution is to find another home where she would not be around another epileptic dog. thoughts?
Andrew says
Myself and my partner are currently going through this…we rescued a collie x staffie x whippet about 5 years ago. He was estimated to be 3 at the time so he is only about 8yrs old. We got him and we knew he was a bit fearful of other dogs, we spent alot time with him training him and working with him as did my farther. Although with not knowing his past before we got him after a year or so of having him he went through several agressive peaks. One night he turned on us both and pinned us in the corner of the room…we didnt even approach him or anything before he become agressive he just walked in and turned. Since then we have been trying to pin it down to something but he hasnt had a period like that in about 2 yrs and he is full of love and joy. Although we have noticed he has slowed down and he is yelping as he gets up or as he is eating at times. His breathing has altered over the years and he can only run about for about 5 mi utes before is collapses on the floor and sleeps for hours. We are starting to think he maybe older then we first thought. Unfortantly a few months ago he snapped at my mother and caught her hand breaking the skin causing her to bleed…now not serious mind but my mother is on wartherin to thin her blood which means if she gets cut its hard to stop it. This unfortantly has made our decision and tomorrow we have the vet coming to put our beloved dog to sleep. It is soul destroying and to make it worse we have to sudate him before the vet gets to us as we dare not take him to the vet as we know he does become agressive to other animals and at times people. I feel sick to my stomach as i feel as if im playing god with him, but then i want him to leave us in a dignified way. I thank you for this article it has helped alot although i still do not want tomorrow to come as he is such a loving animal and part of the family.
ben says
One of our neihbours has a colley dog and yesterday the woman was taking it for a walk and it dragged her across the street on the lead and bit the postman twice.
Their next door neighbour has twins who are 1 year old and I have twin girls who are nearly three.
I hope they see the danger and get rid of their dangerous dog as i feel unsafe around my property knowing this.
The dog owner has two children on his own and the street has a lot of kids playing. The dark barks constantly and is not walked enough, in my opinion the dog is not stimulated and is in distress barking a lot and being ignored. Its in everyones best interests that the dog disappears.
Any tips on confronting the owner? I’m doing round tonight to have words.
Anna-Magdalena Christianson says
Thank you for writing and posting this article. It is very helpful as I am seriously considering euthanizing my dog.
About my dog: She is a female, recently neutered, German Shepherd Dog, 4-1/2 years old, that I have had for 2 years. Some time before I got her (from a breeder/trainer) she was attacked and seriously injured (neck/throat) by some of the breeders’ other dogs. I was told the dog had some timidity issues, but that as I worked with her, we would both grow…
We do not have a fenced yard, so she is a house dog. She shares the house with a 6-1/2 year old female (neutered) rat terrier mix. They do not get along well and the little dog nips and growls at and appears to be afraid of the big dog (who, when she pounces on the little dog, I assume is only play).
During the week I am alone with the 2 dogs. My husband is home on the weekends. My dog (the GSD) has never gotten along with him, physically avoids him, growls at him, and has bit him twice, both times breaking the skin and drawing blood. She waited until he walked by then bit the back of his leg. He has tried for 2 years to win her over, but to no avail. (The second bite was less than a week ago.) She was raised, by the way, with 2 (human) females (the breeders/trainers) and was with them 2-1/2 years.
My dog is an ssig (autism) assistance dog – for me. She is not a pet. I am very, very attached to her. When I take her with me in public, I am always unsure of how she will behave/react. She is unpredictable. She will physically attempt to avoid people if they approach, may growl, may even lunge. She scares people. Once she bit someone who walked by. If she sees another dog, she tends to growl and lunge.
My friends and husband suspected something was not right with the dog the moment I first brought her home. I am only now beginning tovrealize her problems are not normal, are not going away, are getting worse, and are, in fact, serious.
I have an appointment with a professional assistance dog trainer to have the dog evaluated (by a disinterested party) and with the dog’s veterinarian to talk about euthanasia. I have the option of returning my (beloved) dog, but I hesitate to put her back in the environment (with 40+ German Shepherd Dogs) in which she was attacked. She would need to be trained to be a pet, but, in my opinion, with her issues she will not make a good pet and I believe separation from me may be traumatic for her.
So my decision to euthanize her. Yes, it breaks my heart, but it seems to be the kindest, most humane thing for her.
Pam Green says
To Thomas W , whose epileptic Poodle gets attacked by his other dog.
You ask if some scent preceeeds the epileptic episode and perhaps is the trigger for the other dog to attack.. Yes, some scent almost certainly does precede a seizure. One of my net friends says that if she goes off meds and has a really bad seizure, the stink is so strong even she can smell it. regardless of whether there’s a pre-seizure scent, we certainly know beyond all doubt that some (probably most ?) dogs can easily tell when their human is going to have a seizure several minutes or many minutes before the seizure happens. (maybe the cue isn’t scent , but I’d put my bet on scent.)
Now that doesn’t necessarily help you to prevent these episodes. I assume you already have the Poodle on anti-seizure medication. I assume you separate the dogs with some barrier (strretch gate?) when you are not actively supervising them. Maybe having some really strong masking scent on the Poodle (rub him with garlic ?) could help, but considering that a dog can pick out a tiny amount of scent X even when surrounded by a truckload of Y, I wouldn’t bet on this working. Maybe maybe a DAP (Dog Appeasing Pheromone) collar on the Poodle could help.
If you are going to permanently separate the dogs by placing one of them, it’s going to have to be the more adoptable dog who gets placed. And you must fully disclose vebally and in writing all of the “bad news” about the dog.
Nicole Lee says
I’m currently in the situation of having to decide to put my dog down. She’s been my #1 for 12 years, but has always had a distaste for children. We’ve kept her and others safe for 12 years. She’s the best behaved dog I have (I have 3 dogs at home). She is sweet and loyal and she listens. But she doesn’t like children. This has not been an issue. We separate her when any kids are at our home and she’s fine with all other strangers. 4 months ago I gave birth to my son. Needless to say she didn’t take on the “motherly” dog role I had been praying for. She has been aggressive and pushy with him since he came home from the hospital. No matter what we’ve tried with positive reassurance techniques, she bit him last week. After crying and talking to my boyfriend, my family and my vet- we’ve come to this place. But she’s my baby too! It’s not fair. My dog, Daisy, has been reduced to be pushed outside when the babies playing or being reprimanded for growling and lunging; she’s lost 12 pounds in 4 months. My vet says this a mental health condition and I should look at it that way. She’s mostly healthy otherwise, but her mental state and quality of life are suffering and it will only get worse for her. I still don’t want this to be happening. I don’t want to choose this for her. My heart goes out to anyone who has ever had to be in the position.
Bri says
I came across this thread looking for support in the toughest decision of my life. About 6 months ago, my boyfriend and I rescued a stray dog. He was a 1.5year old adorable boxer-mix. I have never been so in love with a dog before. He was the closest thing to a child to me, and I sure did treat him like one too! Even though we saved him from being taken to a shelter and we also treated him for worms and allergies….I truly feel like he saved me as well! The joy he brought me is unexplainable! We made the mistake of letting him sleep with us from the beginning. He just loved being right next to us, and we loved cuddling with him as well. A few months after bringing him in, we had our first incident. When I tried to get into bed when the dog was already sleeping, he jumped up and lunged at my boyfriend. He didn’t snap at him but just aggressively growled & barked. It scared us to death because we’ve never seen this side of him. We tried getting him to sleep on the floor instead and even went as far as bringing a mattress into our bedroom in hopes he would sleep on the mattress on the floor next to our bed. It was a joke amongst our family and friends, because many nights we would let our spoiled dog sleep in our bed and either my boyfriend or I would sleep on the mattress on the ground! lol! Well 2 nights ago, we had our final incident. My boyfriend and the dog were sleeping in the bed and I was sleeping on the mattress. At about 3:30am I was woken by this horrific growl, but this time my boyfriend screaming as well. It all happened so fast, but that our beloved baby turned on us. He attacked us in our dead sleep and we couldn’t get him to stop. It was almost as if he was possessed. There was blood everywhere. After about 5 minutes of viciously biting us both, he stopped on his own and acted as if nothing happened. We gathered some belongings and rushed to the emergency room. I had 8 puncture wounds on my arms, legs, hand and foot. My boyfriends’ nose was practically detached from his face. 🙁 I have never been so traumatized in my entire life. This was my best friend…my baby. My boyfriend felt we needed to put the dog down immediately. I bawled my eyes out and turned to local rescues, trainers and vets for advice. They all stated re-homing a dog that attacked like this was out of question. The vet believed our baby had “rage disorder” and unfortunately advised us to euthanize him. I am devastated. I can’t even sleep because I keep going back and forth on how much I miss him and how I feel like a failure and then I keep having flashbacks of the attack. I just keep thinking- what if we would’ve crate trained him …what if we never would’ve let him sleep in our bed….I’ll never forgive myself for putting him down, but I truly feel like we had no other choice. My boyfriend and I have been sleeping at my moms house because I can’t even fathom going home and not seeing my baby run up to me to give me kisses. I’m heartbroken.
Anna says
I had to put down my beloved dog Tonka yesterday. It was the worst moment of my life. We think he was a pitbull pointer mix. My brother and his girlfriend adopted him from a shelter about 3 1/2 years ago when he was about 8 months old. He was and adorable puppy and my family would watch him on occasion. A few months after they got him my brother and his girlfriend broke up and couldn’t keep him anymore. My family decided to keep him because I couldn’t bear to never see him again. We had him for three years. He was such a sweet dog. The name Tonka suited him well. My mom described him as a crash dog. He had long legs that he didn’t quite know what to do with and he would bump into things often but that never stopped him. He was a very affectionate dog. He always wanted to be near us. When he lay down he had to either be leaning on you or resting his head on your foot. of course if he had the chance he would prefer to sleep on top of you. He slept every night curled up right next to me. He also had these adorable eyes that went straight to my heart every time he looked at me. He was my baby. During the time he was with my brother he had one run in with a human. He escaped one day and started chasing horses around and when the owner came out and grabbed him Tonka bit him. We figured that the reason he bit him was because he was scared and cornered and we didn’t think anything more about it At first he seemed to be pretty friendly. He got along well with other dogs and other people. However as time went on I started to notice his behavior change. He was no longer friendly with the dogs at the dog park and almost started a few fights. We stopped taking him after a littler while. The only dog he liked was my other dog who was a sweet 6 year old female sheepdog mix Maya. They never really fought and they would chase each other around the yard endlessly.The same thing started happening with people. He didn’t like strangers. It seemed as though he had an inner circle of people that he knew when he was a puppy and those were the only people he liked. To us he was a baby, but to everyone else he was less than friendly. He did not like kids except for the two that were the children of family friends that he knew when he was a puppy. He really disliked men. We had to start putting him away when people came to visit especially after he nipped at a kid who was visiting. He also had a very strong prey drive. We still didn’t consider him as dangerous though. One day my mom’s friend was visiting and he charged at her and might have bitten her if I didn’t grab him. About a year ago he escaped and killed my neighbors cat. They were really nice about it and didn’t report it but we redoubled our efforts to make sure that it didn’t happen again. We installed an electric fence around our whole house. His aggression continued to get worse. Taking him for walks became a struggle. I was always afraid that he would escape someday and kill another animal or worse, bite someone. He began ruling my life. Every time I went out for more than a few days I was just waiting for the call to come that Tonka had attacked someone. When I thought about his future I somehow knew deep down that he wouldn’t live long. I was the only one in my family who seemed to notice that he was becoming a real problem. He started nipping at my dad’s feet when he walked into the living room for no apparent reason. However to my mom, my brother, and I he was as sweet as can be. Then a few nights ago when he was sleeping on my brother on the couch, I went to go nudge him off the couch to take him to my room. It was the same thing I had done every night for months only this time when I put my arms under him he lunged at me and bit me in the face. I needed 14 stitches. The vet told us our only real option was to put him down and we knew it was the right choice. It wasn’t a matter of if he would hurt someone but when. That stupid dog broke my heart. The house feels so empty and lifeless with him gone. It doesn’t feel right sleeping in a bed without my buddy there. I keep questioning myself on whether or not it was the right choice. I tell myself that it was but I still am not sure. My heart goes out to anyone faced with this situation. Thank you for writing this post. It helps to know that I am not the only one.
Sara says
My dog nearly drowned as a 5-week-old puppy and now, over a year later, he is having aggression issues. It began almost four months ago when he thought he was going to get in trouble and began to growl and it has only escalated from there. Over the past week, he has growled and been aggressive with myself, my brother, and toddler sister for no reason. It is becoming to where I am afraid to even verbally reprimand him for fear of his reactions. He even gets out and attacks neighborhood dogs. I have tried everything and am on the verge of putting him down. Would someone please give me some advice? I love this dog and done everything I can think of to stop this, but he is unpredictable enough that I wouldn’t be able to sleep at night if I re-homed him because of what he might do. I think that he may have brain damage from almost drowning as a puppy because he seems clueless often and doesn’t even act like he understands why he is in trouble when he growls. He has never been abused or mistreated and I don’t know why he is doing this. Any advice would be much appreciated!
Amber says
This hits home, hard. We are going through this as we speak. Thank you for writing this, as it is very hard to find information like this online. I have never felt so alone lately because no one talks about having aggressive dogs. And then I look at all of these comments and know I’m not alone. Thank you thank you thank you.
Wazz Pearce says
Thank you for writing this.
It has only been three days since we said goodbye to our beloved little man Brewski, who died with his head on my lap and me telling him over and over how much we loved him.
For a long time we had been treating our boy for his hip pain, which started when he fell off a wall as a little pup. It got steadily worse, to the extent that he would growl at anyone who tried to stroke his back. Occasionally he would growl and snap at our daughters (now 5 and 2), as well as house guests.
We spent an enormous amount of time and money, including surgeries, acupuncture and behaviour therapy, trying to get him right, but it couldn’t stop the advancing pain. The behaviour therapist who came round on Friday spent time with our boy and noted that he was suffering.
So that’s why we ended up taking the hardest decision of our lives. He was never quite right, he was plagued with anxiety and we had the ever-present stress of worrying if he would lash out at our girls or their friends.
Sorry for the ramble, but the past few days we have been plagued with guilt and remorse, endlessly asking if there was more we could have done, could we have bought more time, could we have made him happier? But we have to believe that he passed knowing he was cherished, and that we will always, always love him.
KELLY says
Hi,
Thanks so much for bringing this up. We have a 10 month old pup that is Boston Bull x English Bull mix. However after getting the pup at 6 weeks we learned the lady we got her from was selling for the Amish ( dont know if I spelled that right ) so who knows what she is. I forget when it was when she was a couple of months old she got something I went into her cage to get it and she growled at me. I knew then something was up. Now she has bit 2 strangers am lucky I didnt get sued? For what I call no good reason the first guy just walked by me then Bella jumped up and bit his hand. There was a mark but no blood. She has now tried to kill 1 of my cats twice. And a week ago I live with my elderly Mom who is 80+ Bella bit her hand til she did bled. I had a trainer come and walk her and said she thinks she has fear aggression? The other day my husband tried to move her head out of the fridge and she growled and went to bite him. Yesterday she tried to bite my Mom again when she tried to move her out the door, we have the AC on. Then lastnight my Mom was outside doing yard stuff and Bella jumped up and bit my Moms hands until finally they bled. My son had her out side of a store when I went in she tried to bit another stranger. I have tried to do some of the training with her what I was told but now when I go to correct her she growls and goes to bite me. So am having to make the call should I have her put down? And all this when she was on relax pills. I have really tried to find her a new home with someone who might know how to handle her more there is no one. No rescue will take her because of what she is like. I dont want to have to worry when am out will Bella really hurt my Mom? Sometimes you dont know what will set her off. We love her but I cant have a dog that means to bite. And I can say I see it getting worse. I feel a dog should be a joy not a chore. Thanks for letting me put her story on I say it with a heavy heart. I have had dogs all my life and many different kinds of dogs but nothing like the way Bell behaves. Then again I have never had a pup from the Amish either. She is going in tomorrow, it sucks so bad! Thanks
Janet Gursky says
I could use some advice. I adopted a Mastiff almost 3 years ago after my husband passed away. I don’t know his entire history. I was told he had ended up chained outside and eventually ended up in the pound. He can’t be crated (even in a room with the door shut panics him). He had growled at workers at the pound and they were going to euthanize him. A rescue group went in and took him. They treated him for heart worm and neutered him. I adopted him. For me one on one he has been great. However, since I’ve gotten him he has grabbed at least 6 people including children leaving scrape marks, he bit my granddaughter on the leg and put in a puncture wound. My daughter-in-laws dachshund was with me from last November and they got along great. However, about a month ago they got into the trash while nobody was home and he grabbed her head and killed her. I took him to a behavior vet about 3 weeks ago (very, very expensive) and they raised his dose of medication and started a training plan. Since my husband passed away, I have gone back to work full-time. I don’t have the time that is needed to work with the dog like needs to be and there is a very high probability that I will be selling my home in the spring and most likely moving into a apt. – none of which in my area are pet friendly for a dog weighing 197 lbs. I talked to the rescue where I got him and they would take him but can’t promise he’d be re-homed. With everything the dog has been through I’m not sure it wouldn’t be safer and kinder to him to have him euthanized. Any suggestions or advice will be really appreciated – heart breaking decision either way for me.
Madhusmita says
My pet is a socialized dog but now after the ear operations the hunger ness made him too aggressive and attacking. Usually after violence his mood off for two to tree days. Till date i observed his temperaments raised when he is long term hungry stomach, or misbehave with him or u scold him or forcefully you are trying to do something that he do not want or show the stick or try to bit him with a stick. Else he is too good. Understandable, patience, tolerance lovable. The best way is to control him is lots of love and sufficient food. Though I don’t have any problems but by seeing his behavior after the operations my family don’t want to keep him with us. That’s why I am searching a person or an organization who can take care him with love. Please help me if anybody knows any information. Urgent.. because my family member’s behaviour is too rude on him as well as on me.@
BrokenHearted says
I don’t know what to do about my dog….
I have had him since he was a pup (8 weeks) and he is now 9 years old. He was always a little “out there” constantly getting into things he shouldn’t, but he was never what I would call naughty, just overly enthusiastic. He was socialized, although he never took much interest in other dogs (he prefers cats, and oddly enough rabbits) and trained well.
When I had my first child(dog was 5) he was very gentle and careful around her and never showed aggression in any way. And with my second child he has been the same. However, when anyone comes to our home he is growling almost constantly, even when he is confined to another room, and if he gets the chance he will nip at visitors over and over until he actually bites them. He can’t be groomed because he attacks whoever is grooming him. He has started doing some strange things lately also…..he raids the rubbish bins – which he has never done before – to tear up nappies and steal food, even though he always has his meals on time. He drinks out of the toilet, despite having a constantly full fresh water bowl. And then this his fascination with my underwear…..he raids the laundry basket much in the same fashion as the bin and shreds my underwear (bottoms) I have never known anything like it, and can’t understand what he gets from it…? He’s never hungry because he’s fed, never thirsty because he has fresh water….I just don’t get it. I was the only person left with any semblance of control over him, and now he doesn’t even listen to me. It’s been like this now for almost 12 months. With two young children in the house, I don’t want to wait for an accident. He may not have been aggressive to them yet, but they would be the easiest targets. At his age, I don’t want to force any new training on him and I know for a fact he won’t pass a rehoming test because he is too ignorant and aggressive when being corrected. But I still feel like I’m letting him down and giving up on him too soon. I know it has to be my decision, but any advice would be greatly appreciated.
will says
I have a Black Lad Rescue dog 8 years old. We have had him for three weeks and he has bitten me my girlfriend and a neighbor and has drawn blood on two of them.
I love him so much but the rescue place said we have to bring him back as he is now unadoptable. I am torn because I fear he will be killed but I fear he will hurt a child and I cant deal with that. I am so sad.
polly says
I am a dog lover, have 3 rescues myself and I feel for people who have an aggressive dog, but I was just visciously attacked by a neighbors dog. The dog was chained and I was talking with her and the dog broke the chain. This is a 15 year old dog who is aggressive with people. I feel so sorry for them as the dog has history of single bites but with me the dog bite 3 times one requiring multiple stitches. I just fear that the dog might bite a child which would be far more serious. I know if I were in the same situation, given the age of the dog, I would take the dog to the vet myself rather than let the state take the dog away. At least then you could be with the beloved family member. I have an older rescue who demonstrated aggressive behavior when we first got him, but fortunately with constant attention and gentle redirection the behavior has ended. If he goes off by himself I warn visitors to leave him alone and let him come to them. If he approaches someone now it is with a wagging tail! But many times he excuses himself and goes up to my bedroom until they leave.
Janelle says
I had a very small dog, a designer dog, Mi-Ki. I purchased him directly from the breeder 8 years ago and there is no question he was from a very loving and caring home. This breed origin is papillon, japanese chin and maltese and mostly he was a very loving dog. At adulthood he was 5 pounds. Even as a puppy he was anxious and could just snap and get aggressive around other dogs and was nervous around my young nephew despite being introduced to the 2 year old a day after he was brought home at 8 weeks old. 3.5 years ago, I had my daughter. The dog seemed ok but when she was 1 he bit her on her face and was standing on top of her. He left a bruise and I decided it was best that perhaps I re-home him. My father was dying and loved the dog and asked my sister to take him which she did. She kept the dog for 3 months but my widow mother missed the dog and I relented and brought him home. He bit my daughter again and then I had my young son a year after my daughter, he seemed to tolerate my son better but still bit him and again bit my daughter and left a bruise on her face. This animal created much stress and guilt, he was constantly marking, and when my mother would come by she would coddle the dog and reward him for his growling and bad behaviour. There were lots of comments that he would get better when the kids are older etc. Another sister agreed to take the dog if I were to need him to go but my mother’s attachment to him prevented me from doing so despite the dog constantly growling at our children and biting both children. My daughter became attached to the dog and called him “my doggie” She would be very gentle but nothing ever endeared her to him. Yesterday, right next to my husband and me, the dog snapped at my daughter as she was bending down to pet him gently, this time he broke my daughters skin on her face. My husband took a picture of the bite, there were 2 visible bites on her face, and I said to him time for the SPCA. When I called them they told me that he was dangerous and very unlikely to be re-homed due to his age and his history of biting. It was unlikely he could ever be rehabilitated and likely he aggression was going to escalate. Due to his cute profile, children were drawn to him and he looked so adorable and fluffy, I couldn’t risk that the next bite might be my child’s eye or another person’s child. I called the vet and despite it not being our own vet they took us in immediately and he was put down. This was the responsible thing to do but it was a very difficult decision because so many family members adored this dog and he could be so loving. Unfortunately, he could never be loving towards our young children and he was a constant stress in my household. I hope we can heal and I hope to one day introduce our children to a new pet but we will wait until they are much older. I hope my daughter does not develop a fear of dogs and I’m sorry this problem had to escalate to this point. I’m grateful no other child was hurt by this walking time bomb. It was absolutely the right decision to make. Small aggressive dogs can also be dangerous to people.
Jay says
Thank you for this article. My dog turned on me tonight and without warning bit me. She has had aggression issues all her life and each incident we have excused it off thinking we must’ve done something to provoke it. I don’t know if I can trust her anymore. It’s so hard, she is most of the time a good dog. I’m afraid it will happen again.
Karen says
Thank you so much for this article – a lighted guide through this very very dark path. We have a lovely lovely rescue husky type mix. 99% of her is amazing and every single thing we were looking for in a dog but the other 1%… she has an enormous prey drive and she brutally attacked and mauled two little dogs unprovoked. If we hadn’t been there to intervene, we are sure she would have killed them. The risk of this happening again or worse is one we are not willing to take on as the consequenses are too dire. We are working with the rescue society to find her a sanctuary that will give her some quality of life but failing that, we will necessarily have to euthanize her. This is not a decision that we have come to lightly but public safety and the safety of the other animals and people in our household take precedence. If there were identifiable triggers, we could work with that, anything else, we would work through with her. But not this. I couldn’t live with myself if we kept her and she attacked and killed another dog or worse, a child. Sometimes in certain cases euthanasia is the responsible thing to do.
Kristin Seale says
Thano you so much for this article. We are dealing with this now. We adopted Max a year ago from the shelter. He was 2 and heartworm positive and on the list to be euthanized. We feel in love with him. We got him healthy, no heartworms, but he started to lunge at kids on his walks. He ripped 2 kids shirts, on different occasions. We made excuses for him. He snapped at my daughter 3 times and son twice. We hired a trainer and thought it was helping. Then 2 weeks ago bit my daughter in the face. Bad enough she needed antibiotics. I’m so at a loss. The trainer said he needs to go, but a friend told me he just isn’t getting enough attention. I feel like a horrible person. Is it our fault? But I have to choose my child over our dog. It’s beyond heartbreaking and I’m so at a loss. I won’t take him to a shelter to be put down. I would rather take him to our vet and be there for hime while he goes to sleep. I’ve tried finding him a home but once people hear bites and aggressive they say no.
Willi says
I rescued a pit bull and saved it from being put down. The dog had already killed two cats, one of which was mine. He also tried to attack a child but luckily the adults prevented it so the child was not harmed. He attacked me and my little mini-pin that I was holding in my arms. I got bit, part of the skin of the mini-pin was ripped from his back, and the mini-pin and I had puncture wounds. Yet, I still forgave and saved this dog. We live in the jungles of Mexico, a very remote area. The dog’s previous owner died of a heart attack, so the dog actually got jungle wild. The reason I saved the dog, is I thought it was not his fault what happened that made him so aggressive. I worked with this dog named “Toro” for two years. He is now loving and kind and even loves the mini-pin too. Yesterday he dug under the fence, just to kill a sheep in the ranch next door. The moral to this story is once a killer always a killer. I will not put this dog down, but he is secured in a locked area of the garden with high walls so he cannot kill again. My sadness is this, I saved the dog’s life only so he could kill another animal – a beautiful white sheep I have known since she was a baby. So in truth I have failed miserably because I did not have the courage to give the dog a lethal injection, which because of the remoteness I would have to travel to buy it from the vet and then do by my own hand. I just cannot do it. Physical barriers are better. Keep the aggressive dog away from anything or anyone it can harm. Make sure they are very strong like a prison, not small like a cage, but a very secured area. My dog had seen the sheep dozens of times and never even paid them any attention. Then, he suddenly kills one. This is the real danger. It comes as a complete surprise and it is difficult to be 100% cautious, so physical and strong barriers are the only solution. Concrete walls not fences.
Carolyn says
I have 2 Cavalier King Charles spaniels from the same breeder. Our first one, Cooper, is the typical outgoing, sweet and loving example of the breed. He is 10 and I’ve had him since he was 12 weeks old. I got my second pup, Robbie, when he was 8 months old. They were considering keeping him for the show ring and breeding but he grew too tall. Because I wasn’t able to do all the training and socializing with Robbie early on as I did with Cooper, I’ve blamed myself for his behaviour. I feel like I’ve broken my beautiful boy and the guilt is overwhelming. His a guarder of all things including me. He displays many OCD behaviours as well as being extremely reactive. He has attacked Cooper and our cat multiple times, “bluff” charges a knock at the door and anyone who shows up here. He came close to biting someone’s hand a while back. They say it was just a nudge. We have tried medication, herbal treatments, biofeedback treatments, making sure nothing is for free in our house (always a sit and wait for food/treats) and are on edge and hyper-vigilant at this point. I recently read that this is genetic and can really only be managed. Robbie is almost 6 years old and I am exhausted and depressed. I’ve had many pets over the years and have only lost them to illness which is difficult enough. This potential decision is the worst I have ever faced.
Aaron says
We are currently facing the aggressive, but 99.9% of the time happy dog situation. He is a black flat-coat retriever, who we rescued at the age of 8 months, named Willy. He was found as stray at 6 months, and rehabilitated and made healthy in that two months. He is an absolute sweetheart to my wife and I, and loves our 2 year old black lab, they are BFF. The first incident was at the boarders, so we discarded it as anxiety from being away from us for a few days. We started to notice the general anxiety in our home, and kept an eye on him. The second incident was at my birthday party in August, Willy had just turned one the week before, and we had several friends over. He was doing fine, everyone loved him. One of our friends arrived late, came in the front door, someone shouted and it spooked Willy, causing him to bite her in the face. This required 40+ stitches, had to be filed under home owners insurance, and is still ongoing. Since then we have limited human contact, hardly had people over, and always went to our friends houses instead. We went out of town this past weekend, and my brother (who loves dogs more than anyone I know), was watching them. All was good until he went to feed them Sunday morning, and Willy’s food bowl got pushed under the table by himself. My brother went to move it, and Willy latched onto his hand and shook it. Leaving two deep punctures. Between the two latter incidents, we feel we can no longer have him around family or friends, and that neither party would feel comfortable in our home again. We have not made the decision yet, but feel the best case scenario all around is to euthanize him. Any thoughts or opinions would be greatly appreciated.
Stephanie says
We are putting our 5 year old female shar pei down in two days and this is agonizing. She keeps getting worse and bit a 5 year old girl in our neighborhood. I love her so much, but can’t live with the chance she might cause a child or one of my children a terrible injury. If I were a single woman with no kids and a secure, more isolated neighborhood, I would not have to do this. I have consulted with three veterinarians, including one that specializes with the breed. I hope she will forgive me and find peace in the hereafter and I hope in spite of what I have to do, we can be together again and she will be whole. My soul aches with sorrow and wishes for what might have been or could have been. I don’t know how I am going to get through this. I really love her. She is one of the most beautiful dogs I have seen and she has soulful eyes, but sometimes she “switches” and the bad stuff comes out. She always feels bad afterwards. She has bit our other dog twice. She has eaten a wall to the studs. We cannot crate her as she bangs hers head on the crate until her fur is worn away. I did consult with a trainer, but nothing seems to help. I could keep her in my bedroom/basement the rest of her natural life, but what kind of life is that for her? She loves her family and is ultra protective but I cant trust her. My husband and I just feel so sad and heavy and guilty. In the end it is our burden to bear.
Catherine says
Today was the day that I made the sad decision to euthanize my best friend. I have adored a magnificent intelligent dog who enriched my life more that I can describe. Thank you for this thoughtful article, which helped me think the though our sad situation. I know that in our case it was the right decision.
Reilly, my Pembroke Welsh Corgi, was only nine years old. I had hoped that with the best of care, he would live to a ripe old age. From the beginning, I struggled to find a food that he could digest. It took about a year and a half to discover that processed foods made Reilly ill. Rice, wheat, oats, chicken, turkey and tenderly poached white fish all made him feel unwell. His gut gurgled and his stools were mucous-y. Reilly’s coat, nose and eyes were shiny and healthy looking, but tarry bloody stools were testament to his tender digestive system. Raw diets did not help. His veterinarian had no training in dietary matters and would only point to bags of prescription diets offered for sale that contained ingredients that I had learned were allergens. I began feeding him grilled buffalo and a variety of vegetables. The freshness of his food really seemed to matter.
In Reilly’s third summer, while boating in the B.C. Gulf Islands he came down with a bladder infection. A urinalysis showed that he had formed stones, but unfortunately the lab lost the sample. I sought the advice of a naturopathic DVM, who suggested that we might assume his stones to be formed from oxilate crystals, since apparently that was a common type of stone that she encountered. With her help, I adjusted his diet to remove certain vegetables and added qunioa as a base ingredient. I fed him salmon as well and hoped for the best.
We were walking buddies, hiking buddies and joined at the hip. He liked to play “rescue dog!” wearing a life vest and would jump off a boat if I went swimming. Reilly understood many words and sentences and I understood the communicative nuances of his ears, eyes and stance as well. Some human family members were jealous of our relationship, especially because I cooked for him twice a day and insisted on lots of walks.
According to a seasoned dog trainer, Reilly was an “old school” corgi. He had a strong prey drive, so I couldn’t take him to the park when children were on the swings. He wanted to herd them. I learned about sheep herding when he was about 7 months old, and took him. Reilly was a “rodeo herder.” Lots of barking and biting – he put on a show! In sheep herding the animals are classified from “soft” to “hard,” with the “hard” sheep being the most challenging to move around the ring. Reilly loved those more difficult sheep and would make them run.
Reilly’s strong herding instinct translated into herding people as well; not always with good results. He bit our aged and harmless cat, sending her to the veterinarian more than once. I erected play gates to keep them separated. It seemed that Reilly did better with people and the cat when he had more chances to act out his herding instincts, so he and I would drive a three hour round trip on occasional Sundays to herd. We went hiking, sometimes for 15 miles into the Alpine Lakes area in Washington State. We walked to Pike Place Market where favorite vendors would fawn over him and give him treats. He loved going to the market. He went swimming in Lake Washington, but needed to wear a life vest after sinking on one occasion. That happened in the blink of an eye. Had I glanced away in the moment he went down, I would have lost him then.
Reilly loved training with me and learned quickly. We began with what I call Politically Correct Clicker Training, in which the dog gets only positive reinforcement. Reilly became somewhat aggressive with my 6 year old son as the dog became an adult, so I enrolled them in a training class together. This seemed to help their relationship for a while, but the effects faded quickly. I next turned to a herd dog training specialist, who came to our home for private lesson for the two. This also seemed to help, but again faded. By now we had moved to a now home and the gates didn’t work as well in the new house. My son and the cat were always on guard about the dog. I decided to take Reilly for a “make-over” training session at Ewetopia, where Reilly went to shepherd.
We drove the hour and a half to Ewetopia, where one of the owners demonstrated his training methods before a crowd. Reilly resisted, and even attempted to bite the trainer. I’d never seen him do this before. It was difficult to watch, but Reilly eventually relented when a prong collar was used to subdue him. A leather collar and even a simple chain collar had not worked. I hated the idea of using a prong collar on my dog, and even tried it on myself to feel the result of a tug. I decided that I would rather utilize a prong collar than risk my dog biting someone seriously and having to be euthanized as a result. But as with other methods, the prong collar seemed to work for a time but eventually Reilly began snarling at my son whenever he entered the same room. I would chastise the dog and shake a coffee can with rocks inside at him to mute the behavior. I would chastise my son too because he seemed to thrive on the situational drama, and created safe haven areas for the old cat.
A man came into my life, and Reilly liked him too so we married. I decided to change veterinarians a year ago after a new husband and wife duo purchased our local practice. They seemed more intent on up-selling veterinary services than on his care. This turned out to be a fortuitous move, because I selected a veterinarian who specialized in dental cleaning. He urged me to authorize a blood panel prior to the procedure, and the test uncovered elevated liver enzymes and bile acids. These were hundreds of times higher than normal reference ranges. Unfortunately, a urine test identified crystals and a bladder infection. Reilly had bitten my son on several occasions now and I wondered if my dog’s illness and discomfort contributed somehow to his testiness.
Reilly had exploratory surgery by a specialist this Spring. This identified a liver shunt and no atypical cells. Because of his age, the surgeon did not recommend a surgical repair. We hoped that with careful treatment, his health could be improved and he would feel better. The surgery also revealed that Reilly had an especially large kidney stone and several bladder stones. I’m certain that this was uncomfortable and perhaps even painful. We did get stome samples this time, which were sent to the Veterinary School in Minnesota for analysis. It turned out that Reilly’s stones were not formed by oxilate crystals, but were instead 100% uric acid stones. These mean that the animal (or person who has this disease) cannot process a compound called a “Purine,” which is found in meat, fish and many vegetables. I had to adjust Reilly’s diet again and added supplements indented to dissolve the stones. Reilly became a vegetarian, and he sorely missed his grilled buffalo. He was allowed cheese or eggs for protein, and I had two diets formulated. One recipe was created by U.C. Davis Animal Nutrition Services and a second with more ingredient variety by a prominent canine dietitian. As it tunes out, I was so focused on trying to save my doggie friend, that I was losing sight of increasing volatility in his temperament.
My husband was bitten in July because he stepped backward in our dressing room onto the dog, who was lying behind him. This was not yelp followed by a nip. Reilly latched onto his foot snarling, and shook my husband’s foot back and forth in his jaws. My husband fell down with me in the adjacent bathroom and Reilly chomped a new hold on his foot and yanked with all his 40 pound might. My husband was yelling “ow, Ow, OH!” Reilly created several wounds, two that nearly pieced his foot through his sock. It was horrific. My husband later reconciled the bite by acknowledging that the dog thought that he was being harmed when he was stepped on. My husband had also been on occasion unkind to the animal and felt that this had contributed to Reilly’s reaction.
In August, we took a cross country family car trip. My husband, my son, the dog and I all piled into a giant suburban. My son would make ongoing disparaging comments about the dog, whom he had come to dislike. The dog knew he was being talked about in an unpleasant way and would show his teeth whenever my son entered a room. We kept them separate. One night while at our destination, the dog charged my son who was lying on the carpet and bit his hand, again snarling and shaking his head back and forth as he bit. The bite was bad, requiring medical care and had punctured a tendon.
After our return home, it became clear that despite all my best efforts to lead my dog back to health: frequent walks to encourage urination, the time-consuming special diet, medications and supplements, acupuncture and confinement for safety…my dog’s nature and behavior presented a terrible risk.
My darling dog, sweet and obedient with me, was vicious with everyone else in my family. They were unsafe in our home and I KNEW that there would be a next incident. There nearly was a few days ago, when my husband again stepped on the dog again by mistake. Fortunately this time my husband had shoes on, but the dog still managed to make three small puncture wounds through his shoe. I began keeping the dog confined to a maid’s room adjacent to the kitchen whenever anyone was at home beside myself.
Each time I confined Reilly to the room behind a wire gate, I moved the cat’s litter box into a hallway. Unfortunately, yesterday I forgot to move the litter box and Reilly rushed the cat snapping and snarling when she carefully entered the room to use her box. Fortunately, he missed her this time, but the fur on her neck was wet as a result of the attempt. In that moment. my son entered the room and demanded “When are you going to put that dog down?”
It was undeniably time for a decision. This dog adored me and would be sad without me. He could not be re-homed because it is unlikely that anyone would be willing to walk him six times a day and make him fresh meals twice a day, and he had become unpredictable with other dogs as well.
This morning I fed him buffalo patties and vanilla ice cream for breakfast. Why not? We walked him to a clinic near our home, because I could not bear to explain the situation to our regular veterinary staff. The receptionist looked shocked when I told her that I had come to euthanize him. HIM? she said looking horrified. I cried. The procedure was not ideal. The connector between the needle and the catheter line came undone as the assistant brought him to me. Blood everywhere. She could not catch him to take him back to the procedure room, so I carried him. I could tell that they preferred owners not be in the room, but I explained that I am the daughter of a veterinarian. I could do this calmly.
They struggled to reconnect the catheter line, but because I was present and holding my doggie resolutely, he did not have to be fitted with a muzzle. When the line was in place, I carried him back to the room and asked the doctor to begin the procedure right away. Reilly was concerned by the blood and was trying to clean his paw. I held him and kissed him and whispered my love for him into his ear as his heart stopped and he breathed his last breath. I loved my dog more than I could tell him. And he loved me just as much and will feel a void where he should be for a very long time.
Thank you for this forum.
Patti says
This has absolutely been the most helpful website for me. We are putting our male Jack Russell down tomorrow for behavior issues. This is absolutely killing me. Arthur was a rescue 7 years ago and we already had a female JRT. His behavioral issues have slowly escalated over the last two years. 90% of the time he’s the most entertaining and adorable dog on the planet. This last incident involved him biting my female JRT and not letting go. He is totally attached to me and does have anxiety issues. We now have grandchildren, and I won’t go into specific incidents, but it’s more than one. He has not actually bitten, but so close. And he has the most powerful jaws of any dog I’ve seen. He’s bent the metal on our fence and we were going to replace that section and the installer didn’t believe a dog had done that. But I’ve actually seen him do it. That scares me. If he ever did bite someone it wouldn’t just break skin but I’m sure it would break bone. In Arthur’s perfect world it would be me and him living in the woods. His behavior is compromising the entire family. He has to be crated when anyone comes over, we have gates put up in the house. He is perfectly healthy, and the vet agrees this is what should be done. And we did have an animal behaviorist come in and evaluate also after the first incident.
But this is completely different from putting a dog down for health reasons. We had our Cairn put down at age 17 because of the quality of her life. That’s bad enough. The guilt is killing me. My only consolation is that I know we’ve given him a wonderful life. Excellent veterinary care, loved and spoiled. This is heartbreaking and killing me. Thank you to all of you who have given me some comfort in this decision. This decision has only come after a lot of research, soul-searching and forums such as this one.
Thank you all, it’s helps to read your comments.
Ed says
Brilliant article which has calmed me down a little.
My soft as anything 7yr old (m), 10 stone American Bull Masiff – for the first time ever just took a massive chunk out of my hand because I tried to move his bone.
He has never done anything like that before.
My immediate thought was euthenasia – I’m not bothered about my own injuries but I have children and if he had bitten them as hard as he did me I suspect they would have lost part of their hands.
I’m sat here writting this and crying so hard – I just do not know what to do.
I will re -read everything when I have calmed down and will speak with our excelent vet tomorrow.
Let you now the outcome 🙁
Crystal says
Thank you for this article, especially about how euthanasia isn’t the worst thing that can happen to a dog.
We have just had to put our German Shepherd to sleep two days ago. The first day wasn’t as hard because I was so wrapped up in the medical care our 3 year old has needed from the bite, but it has hit me so hard today.
Malachi was 9 years old. For the most part of his life, he had been completely placid. We had an incident a few years ago where he snapped at our son when he was 1 (our son tried to take a bone from him), and we worried then about what the future would hold, but we made sure that any treats were kept for times when they were separated. Malachi often stole leftovers/food from the work surfaces etc. But he and our son were very close, always pottering around together. Just recently Malachi had started to value his own space more, staying out of our son’s way, and was a little less active than usual. Then on Tuesday, Malachi stole a bag of crisps that Dylan had left on the table. Dylan went over to where Malachi was lying (just in the middle of the living room) and tried to grab them back (something we’ve all done before with zero aggression). Malachi growled and bit his head. Dylan screamed, and immediately there was lots of blood and a very obvious 3 inch long deep gash in his scalp. Malachi ran out of the room, then came back in looking afraid. We rang the hospital and were told to bring Dylan in. My husband put Malachi in his crate. I rang the vets en route to ask about an appointment for euthanasia. Whilst I was at the hospital waiting with my son, my husband came home, gave Malachi some nice food, took him to play ball in the garden, gave him lots of love and cuddles, took a few last pictures, then took him to be put to sleep and stayed cuddling him until he was fully sedated.
Dylan had to have a skull xray as the Drs were concerned that the depth of the wound could have meant there was bone damage too. Luckily there wasn’t. He has had to have sedation for 3 stitches to the main gash, and they’re letting the puncture from the bottom tooth heal naturally.
It’s so hard. I feel like I’ve failed Malachi. I keep thinking “but it might never have happened again”. I keep wishing I could turn back time, have been stricter. I just didn’t see it coming. We’ve all previously taken stolen food from him, including Dylan, and he’s placidly accepted it. He’d been accidentally stood or or tripped on or tail caught in doors many times and been just fine. He wasn’t an aggressive dog, but he reacted in a way that was never going to be acceptable.
If we hadn’t had him PTS, I’d have lived every moment afraid of them being near each other. He’d have had to be in his crate most of the waking day. Our household would have been filled with anxiety. We’d have been excluding him from our presence which he would have found intolerable.
I’m trying to tell myself that he had 9 good years, years where he knew he was loved and wanted, and that it wouldn’t have been fair for him to spend the last year or two (I’m guessing, based on GSD life expectancy) excluded from us, especially as he would be starting to get more easily upset and find it harder to get around. I’m trying to tell myself that it was better than handing him in to an animal shelter where he’d spend his remaining life in a kennel (who would rehome an aging dog who had bitten a child?) or being euthanised with no words of love or familiarity. I’m trying to tell myself that at least he didn’t suffer any ill health or chronic pain at the end of his days. I’m trying to tell myself that he drifted off to sleep with no concept that he wouldn’t just wake up and see us all again.
I don’t believe in God, but if there is a heaven, I hope he’s there.
Thank you if you’ve read this, I needed somewhere to write it. I feel like I’m not supposed to be sad that he’s gone, because he hurt my little boy, but I am heartbroken. I don’t know that I’ll ever feel 100% sure it was the right choice.
alice says
Thank you for posting this article. It has been just 2 weeks since I had to make this horrendous decision and I am not sure I will ever be at peace with it. The guilt and second guessing are overwhelming even though the professional trainers and vets we worked with all concurred that our shelter dog was irreparably damaged and that he represented a real danger to other humans and animals. I pray that he knows how much we loved him.
Krissy says
Finding your blog on a Google search has been a blessing. Thank you for putting so many feelings into words. I guess I’m just one of many heartbroken souls that found myself in this ridiculously unreal situation. It is comforting to know I’m not alone and also to feel understood. Thank you so very much.
Linda Fine says
I’m facing this with my shar pei mix. She has attacked a small dog that just moved in. I thought she had broke it’s neck, but it’s ok. She’s been going after our cats. She and the other dog she grow up with have had a few fights over dog food. Ever since all these other animals are here she doesn’t like it. She is scared of some ringtones on peoples phones and either runs and hides or is in my lap. She has changed. My son just had a baby and I have some concerns. Some people are wanted me to put her down and I am thinking maybe I should before she kills one of these animals, I love her so much. It’s going to break my heart. I lost my daughter December of 2013 and this would just be really hard. I can’t afford a behavior specialist. Any suggestions?
broken hearted says
I’ve made the decision to have my dog, and best friend, euthanized later this week. I found him at the animal control rescue in Tucson when I was 19. I had owned dogs my entire life, and been an avid animal lover. I wanted a large breed dog and loved pit bulls so when I saw him (labeled at the time as a great dane/pit mix) I was sure he was perfect. When I brought him home he was severely underweight, sick with kennel cough, worms, muscular development problems, and more. I took him on small walks, at least 5 times a day, to help his legs develop healthily. For the first year I had him he was difficult but the MOST loving dog I’d ever met. I would leave him at the time with friends while I was in class when I could but sometimes he had to stay home alone and it made him miserable. I couldn’t go out or sleep without him, he would howl through the night if I wasn’t home with him. I had never needed to kennel a dog before so when I went to class I’d leave him in my bedroom. He would destroy everything in sight, I mean duvets, pillows, pens, computers, cords, doors, everything. This is when he was being exercised daily, and with me the majority of the day. I would get angry when I’d come home to literally thousands of dollars worth of damage done but I still loved him more than life and we lived happily despite the chewing terror. We went to the dog park almost every day, and I would spend time around the kids park so he could spend time getting comfortable with kids. Over the summer I’d take him home to Minnesota and he loved swimming in the lake by my mom’s house more than anything. He was weary of certain people by this point, but in general still a very sweet dog. Around the age of 2 he started showing selective aggression at the dog park so we stopped going and I continued to take him on playdates with certain dogs I knew he got along with. Around the age of three playdates were impossible, no matter the dog. He started becoming aggressive with the maintenance crew of the house I lived in, and started attacking them. I kenneled him and micromanaged the situations that would set him off the best I could but every time he was with a dog sitter or friend he would behave aggressively and bit hard enough to break the skin of their house guests. I used to take him to restaurants and coffee shops but as the dog aggression worsened it became impossible. When I drove home over the summer he attacked my family dog, who was elderly and harmless. I had seen three professional trainers by this point. The first trainer who saw him from when I first got him told me she thought I needed to see a specialized trainer because the aggression was beyond her expertise. The second trainer, very expensive and published, told me (in all seriousness) that he was socially retarted. The third trainer told me I needed to learn how to micromanage him to avoid negative interactions, and that he needed to wear a muzzle but that that was all I could do. I kept biking with him almost every day but eventually he was unpredictable enough we couldn’t do that either. 2 years ago I brought home a stray dog thinking I would have to find another home for her and muzzle my big dog in the meantime. After a few days with the muzzle the two dogs ended up getting along great and quickly became best friends. She is a little terrier mix and gets along with everyone/everything besides birds. I have never once in my life been scared about my big dog, let’s call him “G”, hurting me. Never. I have complete trust in him around me and my boyfriend who G loves like a father. G is the most affectionate, sweet dog at home with me and with my smaller dog. When we are outside though it’s like a flip switches and he becomes this horrifically aggressive and crazy dog who responds to nothing besides a spray bottle and even that doesn’t work all the time (I avoid using it because I don’t want negative associations). He is almost 7 years old now, (I’ve had him for 6.5 years) I’m seeing a behavioralist who is sure he isn’t a pit bull and is in fact a cane corso mix. My neighbors are terrified of him and the family next-door don’t let their kid in the backyard even though I am always outside with my dogs. His aggression has gotten bad enough he has to be kenneled with the kennel secured anytime someone comes into the house. He flips out on walks when he sees a cat or another dog, he got into a horrific fight with an off leash dog a couple months ago where he refused to let go while a man and I were trying to get him to let the dog go and doing everything possible to get him to unlatch, we finally pulled the dogs apart but both dogs were badly injured. He has had at least 5 bites with humans now, one serious enough for antibiotics and stitches. Even after this I was hopeful that more training could resolve it. He gets along with anyone I’ve dated, and family members, but that’s it. I tried having a roommate and have been working hard to socialize him but even after the roommate has been here a month, G still needs to be tethered and out of reach because he tries to bite. The trainers told me I can’t get rid of the aggression, but just get better about managing it. That would be fine, and I do, but I can’t micromanage every single environment for the rest of his life. Sooner or later I know something will go wrong and the outcome will be terrible. The terrifying thing is that he charges windows now when he sees a person or another animal. Walks are incredibly stressful, even with a muzzle he is big enough that when he sees and reacts to another dog all I can do to manage him is hold him between my legs with my hand on his collar. We tried medication and it just reduced his appetite and energy, it did nothing for the aggression. I wish I could believe he would be ok with the right owner but his mistrust of strangers and separation anxiety issues combined with aggression across the board make rehoming him impossible. I feel like I’ve failed him. I feel like if I had consistently made him the priority in our first 4 years and spent more time each day working with him and exercising him he would be different. Every time he bites someone or hurts another dog I break down and cry, feeling hopeless and exhausted but I’ve always been optimistic about things getting better. The risk is just too great now to rationalize keeping him alive. I’ve never felt so heartbroken or depressed. I feel like I’m killing my best friend but don’t have a better option. I’ve been crying nonstop and the appointment isn’t for another three days. I know my life will be easier after he’s gone but that does nothing to soothe this gutturally sickening pain I’m feeling. Reading this blog made me feel better and want to share my story. Thanks for that opportunity.
Michele says
I write this with raw nerves, swollen eyes and a broken heart after making the traumatizing decision to put my beloved 9 year old Havanese sweetheart to sleep due to her increasingly scary behavior. If you’re reading this with heavy heart because you have to make a horrible decision to live with the anxiety and risk related to caring for a pet with sundowners or rage syndrome vs to stop the madness, I understand your pain.
My little critter lived 7 of 9 years without symptoms beyond general anxiety. (Think licking her paws, and some pacing the floor.) She was my little Velcro dog, who followed me everywhere, cuddled often, danced and yet listened to my commands. Then the symptoms started. First small growls at unprovoked times, then occasional unexpected snaps…which thankfully she didn’t hurt anyone and finally to full blown night rages upon falling asleep. Yet she always woke up happy and playful in the morning. The last straw was last night when she finally had a 2x “episode” of suddenly waking up from a sleep to stare at the ceiling and go “Cujo” at nothing for a couple minutes. I tried to verbally snap her out of it as I previously had tried…the “jolly routine” was an obvious fail. She wasn’t mentally available. She was gone. This time I tried to talk her out of the room to “go downstairs.” She turned her head sideways to see me from her peripheral vision and continued to rage like she wanted to kill something…maybe me. What was happening? What did she or I do to deserve this?
The answer…nothing. I realized at that time that she wasn’t my pup anymore, something cruel and powerful took over her little noggin and my husband and I were no longer safe. After she growled her way out of the room, my husband and I realized how many days, events and visits we had been sacrificing to live this way and that none of us were happy. Behavioral therapy and meds hadn’t worked. How much more anxiety should we or our pup go through to avoid the guilt that comes along with a “final” decision to end it? We realized her issues had escalated over the past 2 years and would definitely continue. After reading this helpful article, postings and a review with our vet, we made the horribly difficult decision to put our pup down. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone, but I do encourage you to have the courage to push through the heartbreak to do the right thing for your pup and family. If your dog is doing scary and aggressive things he/she doesn’t mean to do, and you, friends family and your pup are at risk. Find your way through it…listen to the vet and your logic. Our hearts will eventually heal, our friends will see to it. Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same. Best wishes to you and yours.
Beth says
Thank you for this article. I do a lot of rescue work, have had dogs for nearly 50 years, and I’ve now had two boxers over the years with severe behavioral/ aggression issues. The first one ended up being put down after two trainers/behaviorists deemed him incurable. He attacked my door every time the doorbell rang, and he eventually chewed the doorknob into a mangled hunk of useless metal. If I tried to get him away from the door, he attacked me (misplaced aggression). No amount of counter conditioning helped with me or the other two trainers.
I currently have another rescued boxer who is engaging in resource guarding me. Walks are always stressful, as this dog lunges, twirls, and tries to attack any person or dog that passes by. I have to use a prong collar to maintain any sense of control (and I’m not a fan of them). He will also attack my little dog who comes along if she gets in his way. On two occasions, he’s also turned on me, when I wouldn’t let him attack a bypasser and scratched me with his teeth (not a full-on bite, but close). Again, no amount of counter conditioning him has helped.
The comment made by another poster about having trouble finding a vet to euthanize an aggressive dog is spot on. I have talked to my vet about euthanizing this dog, but she gives me the “get him a trainer/behaviorist” talk and makes me feel guilty for considering it. The animal control in my town doesn’t take owner turn ins either. I hate to not be able to take him anywhere, but his aggression is making keeping him at home a necessity.
Dave says
Thank you for the article. I am going through this right now with my American bulldog. He is 9 and at a very early age showed signs of aggression. He lunged at a child when he was just a year.
When he was a puppy we did the obedient classes,
made sure to have him around children, he was in a doggy day care for the first 2 years of his life. Dog park visits, we tried to do it all.
You could see small signs of the aggression early on. When we had our daughter we introduced her to him for the first time he growled, he started not being friendly with other dogs or strangers. Time went on. We had more kids, and too his credit he has always been 100% with them. From the time they were babbies(besides that one instance) they have done what ever they wanted to him, and he has never flinched (and they haven’t always been very gentle).
About 2 months ago, a family member stopped in with her kids. Always having the dog locked up in situations like this I thought it was fine. One of my kids left the door open though and he got out. He was face to face with our young cousin and he started to growl. The hair on his neck stood up. With our thinking I stepped between them, which blocked his ferocious lunge at him. I got him out of there but it was a very close call.
I don’t have a doubt that given a chance he would attack someone. I almost feel it’s a matter of time. It’s a heart breaking decision for me, because I know how much he loves his family.
This decision has put a strain on my marriage. I don’t think there is a good place for him anywhere except with us or put to sleep.
It sucks.
deborah dequattro says
My Black and Tan Coonhound bit me yesterday because he was fixated on a cup of soup on the counter that I went to pick up. I care for my elderly mother of 90 who lives with us so although I would take the risk myself of trying to train and correct this I just cannot put my mother in jeopardy. We both love the dog but this really scares me. I just can’t bear to put him down and have been trying to find a home but it seems impossible. I also worry that he might hurt someone else even though his is such a sweet dog otherwise. I am heartbroken and just don’t know what to do. The rescue that I adopted him from won’t help either. I just don’t know what to do. If anyone has any ideas other than euthanasia please comment or email.
heather z says
I took in a 8-9 yr old german sheppard mix about 2 yrs ago. She has been agressive lunging at my 2 smaller dogs. I have tried medication for her anxiety for the past 6 months with no avail. Recently she did snarl and bite my hand. Even though it did break the skin it was not serious. i have notice she seems to becoming more and more primal behaving. I love her dearly but i am running out of options. her previous owners were my previous neighbors and she had been aggressive with their son once. she continously licks the couch, carpets etc. she even nibbles/ bites on them also… I love her to death but am possibly facing this option if training does not help and her blood work comes back normal. It is such a heart braking thought.
PAMELA says
Thank you so much for writing this very sound advice, which I have read with interest, and it has done a great deal to straighten out my mind -I am in a terrible state at the moment. Wracked with guilt and indecision. I got a 15 month old Rescue Border Collie in February, and gave her a good caring home – I was her third home. She was 9kg, scared and frightened. Over the months, we have bonded, I have cherished her and brought her up to speed. She came into her own. Tragically, the secure environment meant that the fear aggression trait in her has become horribly evident with her growing in confidence. She started to lunge at people and animals and now invades their personal space. After several near misses, I sought veterinary advice which was to put her to sleep . His view was that she could not help herself in her actions . This was then proved when we left the surgery when she launched herself at another dog and owner waiting to be seen. The vet witnessed this, and said her reaction was entirely typical of what he would expect of her.The reasons for euthanasia were, her genetic predisposition to be highly strung coupled with the cruelty she had received previously combined to make a lethal combination in the form of fear aggression. I have tried numerous strategies, and living with such a situation is a nightmare. Before the situation deteriorated in recent weeks, I utilised the boundless energy, intelligence and speed in Flyball, but that has had to be sacrificed as she now has to be muzzled in public, be kept on a lead with no freedom, and in a secure fenced yard. It is a lonely life with my dog – socially it limits the opportunities to mix and behave normally. She has now recently snapped at me, so although I love her, I now feel a wariness which wasn’t there before. I have consulted a top behaviourist who is also a vet. She has said that although they can help improve the dog, they cannot cure her and I will never have a normal dog at the end of any training – I will always have to secure her. My insurers will no longer offer Public Liability insurance for her after March of next year, and I cannot afford to keep a dog who exposes me to risk of legal claims. The cruellest blow of all, is that this dog is my only family – I have no next of kin. She cannot be rehomed as she is so unsafe. I am therefore facing the terrible prospect of saying goodbye to my pal, and deliberately destroying a dog who although hates the world, has given me her complete trust. Thank you for the very helpful thoughts and advice. Thanks too, for all contributors for sharing your experiences. People have different opinions as to what I should do. Many are condemning, but they do not appreciate the heart-rending dilemma of this situation. Any support you can give at this time would be most appreciated
Trisha says
To PAMELA: You know that I can’t tell you what to do, but I sure can offer my support. I am so sorry you going through this hell. A thought… just a thought, based on what you said at the end of your comment. You said “…she hates this world, has give me her complete trust.” Without in any way suggesting that I know what is best to do (especially having never met the dog), I will say that “trust” is a big category, and could include fighting to save her, or … letting her go, out of the world that she hates. If you did take that option, I’d say that your challenge would be dealing with your own (huge) loss, not betraying her in any way. Argh, it is so hard to have to play god here. Believe me, I know, and I am so so sorry that you are going through this. Based on thousands of clients over the years, and my own experience, I can tell you that without question, the worst time is when you are struggling with making a choice. Once the decision is made, no matter which way, it gets easier. Cyber hugs.
PAMELA says
Thank you so much Trish. I spend most nights staring at the ceiling and can’t sleep. It doesn’t help that there are other things going on – I’m in hospital for an eye operation shortly – but Life never spaces things out – it’s either all or nothing!
I have another appointment with the vet behaviourist in February – this last for 3 hours and so I will make a decision based on what more advice they can offer at that time. On paper, I have a choice, in reality given the risk factor is so great, I feel I have no choice. I have had eight dogs, and when their time has come, it has been a nasty job to put them to sleep, but I could justify it on the grounds of age or physical illness. With my current dog, her coat shines, she wags her tail, her eyes are bright, and she cries with delight when she sees me. She it totally obedient and travels everywhere with me ( tail wagging ) in the car. However, when she sees other dogs, and also people alone or with dogs, she ‘flips’ and isn’t the dog I know. With dogs, she confronts them ( whatever size) her eyes bore into them, and she literally gets right up their faces before snapping. with people, it’s lunging barking and generally going mad. The situation is getting worse, ( she went for 3 men in one day, & a man and a woman on 14th Dec.) I have had to seek veterinary advice as I am at my wits’ end. They have left me a plug in relaxant for the dog, and have sent some calming capsules in the post. In the vet’s opinion, she is at the moment, a dangerous dog. Some people are saying I must be exaggerating, as they have never seen that side of her, but there is no rhyme or reason to these attacks – no common feature – just random. Other people say I am insane to keep such a dog in such close proximity living in the house, given her potential. I am all over the place with this, but can only make a decision when I have all the facts to hand. I’m therefore placing a lot of faith in the 3 hour meeting with the vet in February, but realise that the final decision has to be mine. Many people have suggested rehoming her or returning her to the Animal shelter. I will not do this – the dog would be further traumatised and go from bad to worse. I will not shirk this responsibility if it comes to it, and will be there for my dog whatever the outcome. Many Many thanks for your kind words and support – both are very much appreciated.
PamS says
How timely to find this article today. I think tomorrow our younger, healthy, strong rescue dog will have to be put down. We’ve had her six years. She has bitten five people and has to be chained up all the time when she’s outside. We can have no one come into the house. She can’t stand change or any disruption to a quiet schedule. Three years ago, I brought in a puppy from a shelter hoping to calm the older dog down. She has beaten up this new dog so many times and the dog fight last night, was the last straw. My husband was badly bitten, the young dog is hurt again, and though we’ve tried trainer after trainer, even dog psychologists, no one has been able to figure out her triggers. Now with a baby in the house, I think we are deluding ourselves that we can control her. We are absolutely heartbroken because we love her and we have done our best. With two adults and two dogs, the house is quiet and harmonious. But last night, she went after the young dog while he was laying down. We don’t know what happened. No one was near her. With her bite history, rehoming is probably not a possibility. We’re very lucky only one neighbor called the police – the others just asked us to pay their medical expenses. Through the tears, we are thinking we’ve done our best and she’s always going to be unpredictable. What a horrible decision to have to make.
sandy says
My old dog was Aggressive to People,,Even us …We took to vet and found he was in pain Now on pain killers. He still snaps once in awhile but never has bit us . We carry him up and down stairs And give him lots of treats and love ..The pain pills are in the treats.. We love this old guy so untill he tells us its time We live for him… We dont go anywhere.. No holidays Because he may nip ..He comes every where we go BUT he has stopped nipping now since the pain killers are working ,,FIND OUT WHY YOUR OLD DOG NIPS .. Even we get grumpy in our old age..If you love your dog You live for him ..We got a dog for life and will never give up on him WE LOVE THIS 16 years guy
larry says
My dog is 15 and getting cataracts in his eyes. Going blind.. Sometimes stares at nothing … Sometimes loses contol & messes the floor if i dont get him out soon enough ..He was never one to do this before.. Sometimes needs carrying He growls but never bites…. He still gives me his big kisses ,,Loves his walks and still happy with life despite his going down hill
But because I know he wont be here forever I put up with him.. I avoid other dogs and tell people dont tough him he may bite… i have put mysef in a shell with this dog ..BUT i would never put him down… A DOG IS FOR LIFE i know he will be gone soon and i can live my life again . But for now I live my life around this dog .. I would ever put my dog down for the reasons listed above
murray says
Wonderful article. I just put down my 9 year old Westie companion after he very suddenly attacked my toddler grandson in our house and inflicted considerable injuries. Although I chose my course of action immediately it did not make the act any easier. We rescued this dog 5 years ago and he had a history of aggression but we worked hard with him and turned him around and he became a part of our family. Good with people and kids, but not so much with other dogs. I just recently lost my wife to cancer and the dog began to change and then this incident happened, been a rough year.
Debbie Vassallo-Coetzer says
I’ve just had to make this heartbreaking decision to have my precious Border Terrier/Staffy, Oscar, put to sleep at just 15 months old.
I’m completely heartbroken and guilt ridden and feel I have failed him completely and should have maybe considered more work with him.
He started by bitting a 8yr old on a scooter at about 4 months old. I immediately enlisted the help of a behaviourist via my vets. The police were involved and they were satisfied that he was not aggressive and said whilst he would always have a record of having done this they would not take the matter further.
He then started chasing people on bikes and joggers, and nipping at their ankles. I worked with a whistle and treats and for the most part was able to get him back. Although if the cyclist or the jogger came from behind I’d often miss them and he would catch them.
Then he started biting if he saw anyone holding a child or dog or anything else that was living, in their arms. He caught my neighbours daughter on a few occasions and my grandson too, when I picked him up for a cuddle.
The final straw came when he bit a friend of a friend’s child for just walking away from him.
I know he had so many black marks against him but he also held so many fantastic qualities too. He loved to chase his ball and play fetch and looked so cute doing it. He was so trusting of adults and full grown teens.
No matter how much I know in my head I made the right decision I cannot stop myself from being heartbroken at the loss of such a young dog.
Thank you so much for your blog, it has helped me realise that my darling Oscar had to be put to sleep. I just hope my heart will accept the decision I made soon.
jessilynn says
my name is jessilynn i have a full bread pitbull he was 6 weeks old when i got him he is 11 now i am thinking of having him put down because he is getting so mean lately im am afraid he is going to bit me or someone esls its a gard choice to even think of doing but i know its the long run its whats right for him and for me i luv him dearly but its time so im saying good bye to you hank mana loves u much and i will see you agin s11ome day until then may you
jessilynn says
my name is jessilynn i have a full bread pitbull he was 6 weeks old when i got him he is 11 now i am thinking of having him put down because he is getting so mean lately im afraid he is going to bit me or someone esls its a hard choice to even think of doing but i know its the long run its whats right for him and for me i luv him dearly but its time so im saying good bye to you hank mana loves u much and i will see you agin s11ome day until then may you rest in peace ooxx
CL says
Thank you.
I grew up with big dogs. The story is that I was brought home from the hospital and put on the floor for our two German Shepherds to meet. We had GSDs, a St. Bernard/Newfoundland mix, and a Newfy and never had any aggression from any of them. I worked in a pet hospital for two years without ever being bitten. I love dogs.
On Thursday we will put our 95 pound, 3.5 year old mastiff mix rescue to sleep. We’ve had him for only 3 months. When we went to pick him up, my sweetie had to carry him to the car because Butch was so scared he just flattened to the floor.
Ten days before Christmas Butch snapped at me twice, leaving with me with a puncture and an inch long wound on my hand, and 11 staples on my scalp. He was one layer away from the bone of my skull. The infection in my hand traveled up my tendon and I needed IV antibiotics.
Just under a month later, Butch came to me for pets with a wagging tail. Then he bit my other hand. Back to urgent care.
In the week since then, he’s growled, barked, and snapped at both me and my sweetie multiple times. It’s getting worse.
I don’t trust him and am very careful when petting him. My sweetie is afraid of leaving me alone with Butch. I’m afraid of him. We’ve talked with trainers who say that although we could manage Butch’s environment and life, he can never be truly trusted.
Butch lives with massive stress, whether it’s from genetics or past abuse doesn’t matter now. I can’t walk him because he’s dragged my off my feet several times, once to attack and kill the neighborhood stray cat. I try to give him exercise inside, but he doesn’t know how to play so throwing treats up the stairs is my only option. He resource guards food, Kongs, bones, his space, the couch, me…
Our vet will help us on Thursday, after the mandatory 10 day quarantine is over. Until then, we are trying to spoil him with food and treats. I would love to spoil him with love and cuddles, but it doesn’t seem possible.
The constant tension must be as terrible for him as it is for us.
Bill S says
I am so sad having to make a sudden decision to call animal control and relinquish my best friend for euphanasia.
One day we had our beloved dog Bentley and the next day we sent him off for a death sentance.
Our dog was a pit bull. I was afraid 3 years ago when the kids wanted to keep him as a puppy. My wife and I believe that he was probably the runt of the litter and also separated from his mother way too soon.
I’ve learned to love this dog very much. I hate the dog always on the couch with the wife or kids, grumble that the dog gets to sleep on our bed, gripe that he would steal any sock on the floor, anything else dropped,etc.
But, Bentley became my best friend and as much as I may have griped, I found myself being the one to cuddle with him in the bed he didn’t belong on each night.
Our dog lived freely in our home with our family as long as company didn’t come over.
We still don’t think he was agressive towards people in our home. We feel that he was just so excited and happy that he would run,bark and jump. People without any fear of the dog would be able to pet him without biting. His problem was jumping and scratching with his nails.
We would put him in his cage when company was over. We then felt the cage wasn’t fair to him being locked up in such a small area so we just put him upstairs in our bedroom if people were over. He was good. He would just lay on our bed and as soon as company left he had the whole house back.
People fearing a pit bull for no reason did seem to happen. Our dog in his yard on a leash, other people would not use the same sidewalk. Our dog didn’t look like the so called killer pit bulls. He was a little guy with black fur, half the size of other pits, didn’t have that steroid stance and mean look that so many photos represent of a pit. He was just our little black dog that we thought had some pit bull in him because of how his head looked.
He bit our oldest daughter 2 years ago. We were concerned but also knew the dog was defending his personal space of his cage. Our daughter had one of her socks taken by the dog who would then run to his cage and not give it back. Our daughter reached in the cage and he bit.
Walks were always a battle at first until he learned it’s been 4 minutes of excitement now walk instead of pulling me around.
He had a habit of going into the garbage can in our laundry room, stealing something and running to his cage with it. (I swear he had an alarm bell letting him know if we forgot to close the laundry room door for 30 seconds)
We all learned that if Bentley got something from the garbage or stole some piece of laundry or personal belonging of the kids -to just let him be in his cage and do not approach because a sock wasn’t worth being bitten over, knowing not to reach in his cage when he is guarding stuff.
Once he would leave the area, go outside,etc we would fetch back what he stole. Often, one of us could just get a treat and take it to the next room. He would leave the cage and then come sit and then beg so pretty for his treat, sitting on just his back paws.
Each night at bed time he would be lying in his cage with the door open. If I was still downstairs after everyone else went to bed he would sit in his cage until I said “Cmon time for bed” I would show him a treat each night at bedtime.
A couple weeks ago he bit me badly (stiches to finger) at bedtime. I did what I did nightly, show him a treat near his cage. I even defended his biting my hand as possibly me startling him in his cage whole he may have possibly not have been fully awake,since it waslate and he had fallen asleep in his cage for hours.
Other than these incidents at his cage, he was alovable dog, tail wagging,sit for treats, play with kids, sleep on bed,etc.
3 days ago my wife bought him a one dollar dog toy. A little plastic thing that has now changed everything.
Sunday about 7pm wife takes toy out of bag in kitchen and he immediately took it to his cage near the kitchen. He growled at anybody in the same room. An hour later he was still guarding it. Our 15 year old daughter simply walked down stairs from her bedroom and couldn’t enter the kitchen without him growling.
All night he sat outside his cage guarding what he had put in there. He was entirely a different aggressive dog than with anything in the past.
My wife went to bed. He never went upstairs like usual around 10 pm to be by her and then back downstairs at about midnight to see what I was watching on television, go outside, get a treat and then hang with me until I go to bed and follow me upstairs for a treat.
He guarded this little toy ALL night. It was to the point of me not even trying anymore to coax him out or exchange a treat,etc
I even pretended to go to bed. He always no matter what, would come upstairs within 10 minutes if all lights were off and everyone in bed.
3 hours after pretending to go to bed I noticed he had not come upstairs. I went to go downstairs and was met with growling and attack mode coming at me. He had put his toy on kitchen floor and now wouldn’t let anyone come downstairs.
fast forward to about 6 am and my wife is in the bathroom getting ready for work. She notices the dog in the bathroom with her wagging his tail. She just assumes everything is fine, probably that I got the toy away while he was outside last night.
My wife is done in the bathroom and getting ready to walk downstairs. This daily routine usually includes the dog happily following her,going outside and eating his breakfast.
My wife gets halfway down the stairs and the dog goes after her. He growled. He attacked. He bit her t-shirt at about chest level, missing her skin but ripping the shirt.
She screams waking me up. Our dog is acting so different, lunging at anyone attempting to come downstairs.
Our dog has never urinated in the house. We see a kitchen and living room with dog pee everywhere and he is going crazy not letting anyone on the same floor level as his toy.
We tried. We tried so hard. Our beloved dog was keeping us hostage, growling and ready to attack. In fact, he would run at us attacking just to keep us at bay. My wife had to get ready for work. My daughter had to get up for school,etc.
We were in 100 percent fear that our beloved dog would kill us over a toy.
We had to call animal control to the house for our own dog. The guy came in and was able to get Bentley cornered with those long sticks. 1st he had to use one to get the toy and then another for our dog.
He then asked if we relinquish our dog for euphanasia . In a split second we said yes because of how much fear we were in.
My final sight of my dog was no longer that of a monster. Once the animal control guy had him outside the home, leading him away to the van,our monster dog only moments ago was walking towards the van tail wagging like he was going for a walk or even happier for a car ride. Little did he know it was his death ride.
Our previous dog we had to put down whole old and on his final days. It was very sad but we were able to discuss that decision. We were able to show him love and affection. We were able to be with him until the very end and we were able to say goodbye.
This situation is different. Our daughter woke to get up for school and discovered that her dog was taken away to be put down. She is so sad and even in her words “I didn’t even get to see him one more time or say goodbye”
In my heart I know we had to do it BUT once the situation was diffused and they separated Bentley from the toy causing his rage DID we really need to send him to he put down?
The last view was not a monster. It was simply my dog appearing to be happy again thinking he was going for a ride.
Did we make the right call or should we have told the animal control guy that we didn’t relinquish ? It’s too late now as they’ve already most likely put him down already but such a sudden decision will haunt me. We could have kept him and just not bought him any stupid dog toys for inside the home. He could be back to normal just stealing socks or kleenex but also begging for treats and sitting near me until I go to bed each night and then we argue for the same bed space.
I miss him so much and my daughter will be traumatized over the sudden loss and always question our decision to put him down because we saw what he could do to a person if he wanted to. I love the dog but can’t imagine if our daughter were home alone with him in a similar situation.
Willard & Sherry Bulriss says
We had to put our dog Charlie down 2 days ago. He was only 3.5 years old. Charlie was only 10 weeks old when we rescued him from the shelter. We were told he was the only puppy that lived out of a litter of 6. The mother did not want anything to do with the puppies. He was bottled fed by the shelter, and was only around the 50 cats in the shelter. He was a rottie-mix. We brought him home. He was such a loving a dog to our immediate family, but he had major anxiety issues. He would shake for hours at times when he heard certain sounds, any type of commotion such as the kids running around would cause him to whine and circle around the situation, you couldn’t touch his feet or his legs he would try to bite at your hands, he would suck on any blankets that were around, etc. This dog brought us so much love. He adored my husband, I and our daughter – to a point where he was overly protective. He truly loved us, but his wiring just wasn’t right. As he grew older, we couldn’t have any visitors come to the house. He would run to the door growling, hair sticking up on his back, barking and scratching at the door. We would try to grab him and put him in another room. He would bite at us not even noticing that we were the ones that loved him. When we put him in a room, he would keep scratching and growling until the person left. When we had the children and grandchildren over, my husband would always be on pins and needles. Charlie would get all nervous when they would be playing or it got loud in the house. He was a very hyper dog. He loved to play ball. The kids could not play with balls or any toys that made wind up noises or moved on the floor. He would go crazy and try to get them. If the kids were playing with balls outside he would go crazy and scratch at the door. Even though he had these problems, he showed us so much love – my husband, me and my daughter. My husband retired three years ago, and the dog followed him around every place that he went. Charlie would smile a dog smile and run to the door when my husband said, “Charlie want to go for a ride or want to go feed the rabbit.” We would say “Charlie, say I Love You, and he would say it back to us.” He never once bit at my husband or I. He was okay with some of the other family members, but when they started petting him, if they stopped he would try to bite their hands which made them very uneasy around him. It got to a point, when the little grandchildren came over, the dog was circling them, and when they would give my husband a hug he would snap at them. As he got older his anxieties and protectiveness worsened. He bit my daughters boyfriend 3 times on the hand, drawing blood 2 of the times. We thought that he didn’t mean it until the last time my husband saw how he lunged out at the boyfriend. Luckily my husband was right there to control the situation.
We tried caging him when we would have company, but all he would do would growl and go crazy trying to get out the entire time someone was at the house. We tried a muzzle, and he just tried digging it off and would foam at the mouth. We tried giving him anxiety medicine which did not work. My husband went and discussed everything with our Vets, and they said that a dog like Charlie only get worse. We new we could not rehome him because of his anxietys, biting and protectiveness of us. He would die of a broken heart if we gave him to someone else, and then would if was mistreated? Our only options were to wait until he seriously bit one of our grandchildren, a visitor, or another family member, or put him down. I told my husband no way could we put him down, but he said it was something that we needed to do – What if he seriously bit one of our grandchildren or someone else? It would be too late! Twice we scheduled and cancelled the appointment. It wasn’t until my father came to us and told use about what happen one day when he came to let Charlie out that made use keep this last appointment. My husband and I feel such guilt, pain and we miss our “Charlie.” To us, he was one of our children. The dog loved us too no end – he loved us unconditionally and would have never let anyone hurt us. He was in excellent physical condition! We could have many more years of loving him and him loving us. It was sooooo hard to make the decision. We hope that he understands the reason that we did what we did and that he sees how much we truly loved and miss him. We will probably never find another animal that showed us more love than our “Charlie.” Our hearts are still breaking. One day “our best friend” we be together once more! Rest in peach!
Pam says
Hi! I have never commented on any of the blogs nor websites. I guess there’s always a first time for everything. I got here because I am now facing a very hard and terrible decision for my dog. I have a 20-month old lab and he’s very sweet and fun. However, he’s aggressive to some people. He bit our neighbour and now my mom and brother. He’s moody as well which makes it more difficult to deal with. My family would want to give him up to animal impound but I’m against it. I live in the Philippines, and I know what his life would be if he’s in there. Just thinking about it makes me feel terrible, broken, guilty… its just so hard. That is why I am considering euthanasia instead. But still hesitant about it because I know I wouldn’t see him again. I honestly searched the web thinking if there are others like me who’s gone or going through the same experience, thinking it would give me more clarity and not to feel so much guilt after all. In fact I am writing this with my tears falling down my keyboard. Thank you for posting such a brave topic. Comments help me as well. I guess, today, i have to prepare myself in saying goodbye to my lovely and sweet Carnegie!! Its just so hard…. very hard! :'(
Jeannie Thompson says
I had…I hate the word had…a cocker spaniel named Max. He was 11 on December 9, 2015 and had to be euthenized January 28, 2016. I loved this dog with all my heart and I still cry every day. I got married November 7, 2015 and things went down hill quick for Max. He was a one person dog and that person was me. He didn’t like my new husband and bit him a few times. I didn’t worry much about it until he actually drew a lot of blood with his last bite to him. Max was fine with me and eveyrone else. The Vet said it’s because Max just wanted to be with me and not have anyone else around. The entire 11 years it was just Max, myself and my son and it was a great home. I feel so bad that I got married and disruppted Max’s life. I really feel it’s my fault he is gone now and I’ll never get over it. I really don’t know what to do….any comment would be appreciated.
Trisha says
Oh Jeannie, I am so sorry. There’s not much more to say, except that dog lovers everywhere understand what a huge loss this is for you. I hope you can begin to wrap yourself in the happy memories that you have of Max, and remind yourself of what a wonderful life you gave him for 11 years. Remember too that he is not suffering now… you are, and he wouldn’t want that. Sending hugs…
Pamela says
Dear Jeannie,
So very sorry about the situation with Max. I can only endorse what Trisha has said and add that it took a great deal of courage to do what you did – 11 years is a long time to own a dog, but you were really left with little choice, and I would hope that eventually when the pain you are feeling has reduced somewhat, you will be able to accept that. My heartfelt sympathies – as Pamela above, I am about to have my Border collie put to sleep – I like you, am left with no viable alternative so my thoughts are with you. God Bless you.
CML says
I really appreciate this article. My family and I are struggling with an almost definite possibility of putting our dog down because of fairly sudden aggressive behavior. He’s put someone in the hospital and despite working with very qualified trainers and a great veterinary behaviorist, he’s continuing to escalate. Not long ago he bit someone near their face and I had to pull him off to get him to stop, but fortunately their thick jacket saved them from any damage. I’ve felt like such a failure because I have a background in animal training and canine behavior, so I should be able to help my own dog. We socialized and trained him thoroughly, and checked for medical problems, so the only thing the professionals we worked with can guess is that our invisible fence may have contributed to his intense negative reaction toward strangers. I’d give anything to go back and keep him from getting this way. He’s such an amazingly sweet and tolerant dog with people he knows well, but we live in an area with a lot of kids and pedestrian traffic and I’m terrified of the possibility of him getting out. I know it’s not a question of “if” he’d bite someone, but “how hard.” I’m glad to know that there are people out there that understand what we are going through and that we’re not horrible, irresponsible dog owners. We love our dog just as much as anyone else and would give anything not to put him down, but we also can’t live with the possibility of him hurting someone else. I’m also getting worried about his quality of life. He’s still very loved and spoiled, but his favorite activities were to play fetch and go to the dog park. We can’t do either of these things anymore because he cannot be off leash or anywhere near strangers. I also never invite anyone over because even when we put a muzzle on him, it’s unbelievably stressful to manage an aggressive dog when there are strangers in your house. You were spot on when you talked about this decision having an impact on your health–I have been anxious and losing sleep thinking about saying goodbye to my best friend. So thank you for making me feel less like a dog-killing monster.
Heather says
My husband and I are facing this same decision with a couple of days deadline because I cannot continue to drag out the inevitable. Our 5 year old Aussie, Watson, who we have had since he was 6 weeks old is so smart, beautiful, loyal and 90% of the time, a good boy. But that 10% could be lethal. He grew up a shop dog, at my our place of business with a constant flow of customers in and out and would greet people happily as a puppy until one day. One day we had him behind a gate simply to keep him out from under our feet while a large shipment was being worked out. My stepfather was visiting with us and went to pet Watson over the gate. He gave a little growl but immediately I knew his posture wasn’t right (even though he is my first dog), his eyes were wild and it happened so quickly, stepdad ended up with a small bite to the hand. I figured he felt cornered and with the gate up and no escape route he did only what his instincts were screaming at him. Fast forward 4 years and things have progressed despite our efforts. We’ve gone from being able to have a select few people over to now having to lock him up whenever company is over. He is only at ease with me, my husband and oddly my mom for whatever reason. And our family has grown, we now have one year old twins (human babies). If anyone approaches the door he charges with such ferocity that one time the glass panel was broken and he sliced his paw wide open. Every vet trip requires a muzzle. Every car trip requires that we park with at least 20 feet of safe space, where no one may possibly walk by the car. If he’s in the bed with me when my husband comes home he’ll let out a deep growl until he finally relents and gets off of the bed. Strangely, we can go for a hike on a trail and if people walk by with or without dogs, I simply give him a sit command and he sits calmly while they pass by. A couple of months ago I called him inside from taking a potty break in the backyard and he was lounging on the back porch on his side. He lifted his head to look back and that look was there, that wild panicky look and he ran at me full speed barking like I was the post man and charged, pinning me against the wall and bit me hard in the leg. He had never done that before. Then a couple of weeks later my son was crawling into our bedroom, I was in the master bath, hubby in kitchen, dog on dog bed. I heard that snappy growl that I’m sure most of you are familiar with and then my son screams out. Luckily he barely got him, no blood just a little whelp on the forehead. That day I knew in my heart of hearts that the situation was escalating. Here we are another few weeks later and husband forgot to shut the door after giving him food and my daughter crawled up on him. End result, ER at Children’s Hospital and 15 stitches to the face. If you’ve never have to hold down a non sedated one year old while she’s getting her face stitch up, it’ll be too soon. It was torture. My husband almost shot him dead in the backyard, glad I was able to convince him that we didn’t need the police showing up at the door. I never even wanted a dog, my husband grew up in a multiple dog household and wouldn’t be satisfied until we had one. Watson however has sat patiently beside me or in my lap while I battle the demons of my bipolar disorder and PTSD. He never left me while I suffered through the hyperemesis gravidarium that came along with the pregnancy. He slept beside me by the toilet, he layed in the bed with me for 12 hours at a time when I was literally too sick to lift an arm. And now he’s bitten both of the children that I struggled to carry along with my dad, stepdad and myself. I can think of at least 3 other people that could’ve made the list had I not thrown myself on top of him first. We haven’t even told anyone about my daughter’s bite out of shame and simply not wanting to hear the “I told you so’s” from the people who know how he can be. And yet as I am writing this, I’m having great difficulty believing this is the right decision. He’s been evaluated and determined inappropriate for rehoming and training has not been helpful (not that they weren’t qualified). I consider myself intelligent, open minded, empathetic and able of complex thought but I can come to no other solution. I am absolutely sick over it, totally wrought with guilt and grief. My husband won’t even let him come upstairs the last 2 days since the most recent (& most detrimental) event, so I’ve been sneaking him in after the babies are in their beds to spend some time with him because my husband works nights and setting an alarm to wake me up to put him back downstairs before hubby comes home. He’s so smart and I can tell he knows he messed up and he’s just been so sad since it happened and he’s been completely ostracized from the family. I will take him on Thursday and go for a long walk, buy him a cheeseburger (if the vet days it’s ok to eat) and be with him in the end because even though he bit me as well, I’m the only one he’ll fully relax with and I don’t want him to be any more scared than he already will be. Ugh, I’m so torn up about this but I know what it’s like personally to suffer with a mental illness. I know what it’s like to self destruct and to be incapacitated from anxiety and I strongly feel that just like humans, like myself, sometimes the wiring just isn’t right. Which makes it so much a harder because we are as similar as dog and human can be but no one has put me down even though several times I have literally begged for it. I feel I’ll never be able to forgive myself but if something else happened to the kids the guilt would obviously be worse. I feel like it is my job to defend him because he can’t speak for himself and now here I am giving up on him too. But I know above all my job is to keep my babies safe and this is not a safe environment.
PAMELA says
Hi Heather, I do hope it went well for you today with Watson. I summoned up the courage to put my aggressive dog down on Monday last. It took all the courage I had, and the actual act was easier, when it came down to it, than all the months of torment I have been going through; the dog knew nothing about it, was relaxed, in my arms, and she went painlessly quickly and peacefully. How many humans would appreciate that kind of end? However, the aftermath has not been easy – I miss my dog dreadfully, and still wish I could have kept her. My one consolation is that she had had 2 cruel previous homes but I gave her a good 12 months of life afterwards and she went out on a high note. She is now safe from harm and not at the mercy of a restricted environment or rehoming. Sometimes you have to love your dog enough to do the unthinkable and put him/her to sleep for its own sake. Dreadful experience though, and I NEVER EVER want to go through this again.
Ella says
Hi Heather, My heart goes out to anyone who must make this choice. My husband had an aggressive dog who bit me severely two times once taking the skin off the tip of my finger and the second time puncturing my foot. He bit me a few other times but he luckily caught my slipper or my shoe. with The dog had also bit our older children a few times and a couple of their friends, although not severely to break skin. I was terrified to bring our new grandchild to the house. We were initially just supposed to foster this dog and I immediately asked the rescue society to take it back as it needed some behavioural training. My husband announced to me that he liked this dog and was keeping him. I tried to help this dog to adjust for three years, because there were times he could be friendly and loving.
It got to the point that I was so nervous when my husband came home from working out of town on the weekend with his dog. I was terrified he would bite me or someone else and heaven forbid if he bit a child. I have decided to leave the relationship because I cannot stand by with a dog that may cause harm to another. My husband had told me he would never give this dog up.
Cara says
Thank you so much for this article. We are facing this decision right now and so appreciate the understanding here…particularly the understanding that love is not enough. Regardless of our efforts, there are times when it is impossible for us to ensure safety, maintain a sustainable management plan, and/or live with the current amount of stress we have. Our dog, though we love her, has completely disrupted how we live in an attempt to maintain safety. We recently made the decision to rehome our dog for safety concerns with our children, but I fear, as stated in the article, that the chances of finding a suitable match are slim.
Adam says
Sure, I’ll give you some feedback… 1st off, good post! A hard subject that almost no one is remotely prepared to handle (even us experts)…
Prior to specializing in working animals (& to varying degrees to date), I specialised in rescue/ assessment/ rehab/ training/ handling aggressive/ fearful/ dangerous/ traumatized/ behavioral issue cases.
I got into the field because I grew up with a clinically insane soft coated wheaton terrier with severe aggression issues & later had to heal my pitbull from the violence she saw/experienced as a result… So many regrets…
The wheaton was never right in her head, a rare mix of true unmitigated generational aggression, chronic severe anxiety issues, extremely bad breeding, out of control behavioral/social issues, health issues, etc!
I kid you not when I say she literally refused to drink any liquid for over 5 years & only survived due to extraordinary medical interventions,, 24/7/365 nursing at home & water boiled into her food! Then 1 day she watched my pit drinking, then got up for a drink & didn’t stop again until near the end.
She had pica & ate all sorts she shouldn’t; my family probably paid over $30,000 on her care which included a long list of dog whisperer, psychologists, behaviorists, trainers, vets, psychics, universities/specialty clinics, etc… For the most part, it all failed miserably! Even if they reduced the frequency of serious aggression mildly; reduced aggression is NOT under control!
No joke, the dog used to search me out to bite me… She would put her bone intentionally beside, wait for me to make any movement & instantly viciously maul me for daring to move. She would sneak into my bed while I was sleeping & then I would be woken to being viciously attacked for daring to move in my sleep!
I treated her respectfully & with kindness but I was the target for her rage. If anyone in the house fought, she find me to bite me for it… If I wasn’t home, she’d be sitting by the front door for me to return so she could bite me. Unfortunately, in our family I was lowest on the totem pole…
The 1st time she bite outside the family, she was less then 6 months old & seriously attacked her “favorite” neighbor for daring to offer the usual treat. She attacked countless animals, over 2 dozen people (outside me) & caused incalculable damage! By 3 had bit all else in the family & by 7 even seriously mauled my mom & her favorite person!
Eventually she was put down at about 13yo, after finally succumbing to her health issues! Sadly, though despite maturing, growing up, working through my issues & becoming educated; the harm that little dog caused was just unjustifiable! It had severe long term effects on me & I doubt I’ll ever forgive my family for knowing the dog posed intolerable danger to their child & choosing the dog over their kid!
Besides the harm it caused me, I was/am also incensed because she was not a happy pup, she had no meaningful quality of life & had pretty much every limiter/disadvantage imaginable! She deserved to be let go to finally escape her demons!
While its true that most dogs pose little danger & can be safely treated, it is never OK to elevate an aggressive animal above humans! I understand that such animals are loved dearly & nobody wants to lose their animal but that does not make it OK to not control your animals!
Adam.
rose says
help my dog Oscar is going to be put down tomorrow please help!! *sob* : ‘ ( HURRY
rose says
HELP PLEASE
I DONT WANT HIM TO DIE BUT HE ATTACKED MY DAD AND SENT HIM TO THE ER
Trisha says
Rose: I’m so sorry. All I can say from here is that you need to talk to a professional in your area. If you can find a way to manage your dog with complete safety for a few days, then get a recommendation for a behaviorist or progressive trainer in your area. Meet with him or her and then make the best decision you can. Best of luck to you and your family.
ANNE SPINK says
We had our beloved Akita put to sleep 3days ago and I can’t live with what we have done. We owned an Akita for 11 glorious years, we rescued her at 5mths old. we were responsible owners and never let her off the leash until she was an old lady and then anyone approaching with a dog we leashed her. She never acted aggressively but we knew she was protecting us and she did go into the mode of stay away.Loved us and everyone that was invited into our home .bROKEN HEARTED WHEN SHE PASSED WE DECIDED TO HAVE ANOTHER aKITA, WELL researched and from a good breeder. From being a pup she was difficult to handle, growling when brought in by her collar, didn’t like being picked up to get into the car. We weren’t worried ,Akitas are a breed that are strong willed and courageous. As she grew the problems did, the neighbours children either side were afraid to play in the garden because she went with gusto at the fence barking and definitely not happy they were there. Into the mix we still had our labradoodle who had a wonderful relationship with our old Akita.He has been attacked so many times and so quickly ,mainly because a piece of food has been found on the floor that we didn’t know was there, bearing in mind we were very cautious about any food anywhere on display. Last week my daughter was cuddling our Akita and the smaller dog decided he wanted a cuddle too and was attacked. Each attack we have had to separate, this time my daughter was bitten. We can’t take her out for a walk, she acts like other dogs are prey. Puppy school at 3mths,training by us and then two behaviourists. We have clicked and treated, played children playing noise to desentivise, put up screening between the gardens. The dogs played together but we never knew when she was going to suddenly turn on the smaller dog. We also had gates for our 3yrs old grandson, we were teaching respect on both parts in small sessions but we were also aware the day the gates were open by mistake it would be all over because a boisterous 2yrs old would pull unsupervised and he would not be tolerated. Having said this, our big girl loved us and never did show any aggression towards our grandson ( he lives with us ),she enjoyed visitors all but one of our neighbours and the first behavioralist we had visit. She was stubborn and we expected it, but not the growling when we wanted to move her for what ever reason . We have always had dogs and loved them. We knew in our hearts that one day we would find our smaller dog dead and if she ever escaped there would be a tragedy.We have lived on edge for two years but carried on trying to problem solve. She has now been put to sleep,we are crushed and broken. After talking to the vet and behaviouralist there they said it was the only decision, she was a time bomb waiting to happen and not able to rehome her because of how she behaved.I hate myself and feel we have let her down because we knew she would be strong willed and not social with other dogs according to all the literature, but our older Akita that passed was a sweetheart and we never had a a problem with her. The stress in our house has gone but replaced with guilt and heartbreak. I hope never to experience anything like this again. We will never have another dog as we feel we don’t deserve one. I have never felt so bad in my life. Please don’t read this and think she was not loved,her behaviour was frightening at times but we loved her with our heart and soul and tried so much to resolve problems and the love she gave to us will be a constant reminder of how we failed her and then took her life away. I am writing this on here because at the moment we are in turmoil and not many people would understand why we made our decision to end her life, I feel like everyone will hate us. Reading all the comments has helped in a way but I can’t get my head round the fact we knew what kind of breed she was and we knew that she would be strong willed,although we never expected some of the behaviours we couldn’t control.
rbgrocio says
We are currently going through this, and it is, by far, the hardest thing I have ever faced. I often say that this is 10 times harder than going to law school. Why? You might ask. Well… I am a controlling person. I am used to fixing things. I am used to coming up with a plan, sticking to it, and reaching a somewhat desired result. But I cannot fix my dog. No matter how much money I spend, how many hours I dedicate to his training on a daily basis, how careful I am with him… I just cannot fix him, and that breaks me.
Paco is my beautiful basset hound. He is 3 1/2 years old. I have had him since he was 12 weeks old, and although he is my first dog ever, he was not my husband’s first dog. We had a good one and a half years, and then the growling started. We, clueless as we were, thought it was a phase. He snapped a couple times (nothing too serious), and we, again, thought it was just a phase. But then the first bite came. He drew blood, but it was the pressure of the bite that hurt the most. My hand felt as if it had been crushed. It took so long to process what had just happened that I did not even cry at first. It was mostly shock and this huge heartache. I couldn’t believe my hound, who I had seen grow up, who used to lay on my chest and sleep there had bitten me. There have been several attempted bites since, and he has made contact a few times.
Paco has been diagnosed with fear aggression and he developed a phobia to being wiped with washcloths, napkins, paper towels… pretty much anything. This has made it very difficult to take care of him. He is also on Prozac, which has helped, and he sees a wonderful veterinary behaviorist, Dr. Rodasta, in S. Florida, who has been a life saver. She is the reason Paco is still alive today (18 months after his first bite). She taught me how to counter-condition Paco, and I was eventually able to clean his ears, his belly, his paws, his butt, medicate his ears when and if there was an infection, brush his teeth. I thought we were in a good place, but then he started declining again, and sometimes I cannot help but feel that we are just playing a game of time–how long will this be sustainable? How long can he have a good quality of life? How long can we deal with the heartache that comes every time we have an incident?
We are not ready to let Paco go yet. We can still live with him. We do not have children, and he does not come into contact with others. But living with a dog who is willing to and will in fact bite you is very difficult, stressful, and my main source of unhappiness. We have had the conversation about euthanasia, and while it is not the right decision for us now, I do feel that sometimes it is just a matter of time. I hope we never have to get there, but I want each and every single one of you who have gone through this to know that you are not alone, and that it is not your fault. I know how hard it must have been because I cannot talk about my dog’s issues without crying and feeling that maybe we have failed him and made him this way somehow.
You did what you had to do, and while I hope I am never in your shoes, sometimes I can’t help but think about the end in order to prepare for when it inevitably comes.
Before you give up on your dog, though, please try a veterinary behaviorist. They can be expensive, but if you have the resources and dedication, they can help you and at the very least prolong your dog’s time in this planet.
Maria says
Hi I need some serious advice here, I actually have learned dog training and have been studying/working with dogs with a range of issues and am getting my certification in canine behavior but I am now at a loss for something in my OWN home…I dedicated my life to bully breed dogs because of what happened to us a few years ago that left me with one dog who died and another with what seems like severe ptsd. She and her “sister”were shot by a disturbed man with a handgun at his side as he mulched his yard. They were trained by me…very well…but that day, when a squirrel got the best of the older dog by jumping literally right in front of her, her “prey drive” kicked in and Koda followed suit. That man unloaded a full clip into them that day. He shot them both from the side as they ran by chasing the squirrel…Koda survived ONLY because she was farther away from the man and she ran home after he shot her…her sister died because the man then grabbed a secondary weapon and sat in his garage holed up with his shotgun so we couldn’t get to her in time. Koda suffered a lot of damage that day and she had to have surgery after the shooting to screw in a metal plate to fuse her bones back together where one of the bullets entered her body and ricochet around. She had to go through water therapy to grow strong again. Since that day, Koda has never been completely the same. She is fence aggressive but doesn’t respond to training and counter-conditioning/desensitization and sometimes she acts rather “off” she has scaled the fence a few times even at 8 feet and has bit two people and a dog. (My 18 year old son and husband were both responsible for not WATCHING her while she was outside as I wasn’t home.) She just overall doesn’t seem ok and we are so scared it’ll get worse and she causes other anxiety within our home with our other dogs because she will do this high pitched irrational yelping sound when she gets excited and there is no way to calm her down and it upsets the other two dogs. Anyways, I have tried everything and we are so scared that it’ll just be a matter of time before something happens, and I was hoping you’d know if there was help for a dog with ptsd or if she’ll ever calm down/be “normal” again? We would be scared to give her to another home so we don’t know what to do and talk about guilt…nobody can imagine the guilt that I carry…it’s changed my life more than anyone can imagine so this would be HARD to decide…I just was hoping for some advice/help…
Pam says
I had to do this. And to two dogs, from the same litter. Both had been homed, but based on what I was told when the dogs came back, I believe they were abused (in spite of my best efforts to make sure that didn’t happen by placing them well). The dogs came back to me with behavior problems (no – I am not a breeder). They were wonderful loving dogs, except when they weren’t. The incidents that happened with them were serious enough (attacks on other dogs in the household. Killing one pack mate. Rushing from a laying position to bite a friend of mine. Attacking their dam….) that I was fearful of injury or worse to friends and neighbors. No-one could come to the house. We live on 30 acres, and my neighbors like to bring their kids to fish in our pond. I was terrified that one of the dogs would get out and harm someone. I sought help, to no avail. The help I did find made the problems worse. I searched and searched for answers and alternatives and in the end it was the only responsible thing I could do. The killing of another dog in our household was the last straw. My mother had tried to help out and got confused. She let my little boxer out with the two (who we were keeping separated from the other dogs in the household). I was not home and my then 73 year old mother was out in the yard trying to break it up and save my little boxer Bella. The aggression could have turned on her. My mother. She couldn’t help, and had to watch Bella die. She was traumatized and terrified of the dogs. I buried three dogs that week. I am still brokenhearted over it. It is terribly grievous to me, and even though I know it was the right decision, I can’t help but feel that I failed them – in the worst possible way. I’m sitting here bawling as I type, and it’s been two years.
Rhoda says
Aggression can be exhibited is so very many ways. I bred a dog (held him as he took his first breath) and at 4 months of age we found out that the stud that I sent the bitch to was sterile, but that the actual sire her brother. The brother/father of the litter had some temperament issues that made him a “never breed dog.” That old “husband didn’t listen to his wife” event.
Fast forward 5 years, and I get a call from his owners that he had snapped at their toddler. Of course the boy came back to me. I hoped to re-home him, but after 8 weeks, it became obvious that he probably was not “wired” right. Much though, much discussion and observation by trusted “dog wise” people and I am now trying to figure out if he would be safe in an emergency where someone had to leash him up/put him in a crate, let him out of a crate and leash him up. Stuff happens in homes and I was walking a tightrope of “Can I/Can He.” Then one day as I am headed up stairs, he was ahead of me. He stopped on the landing and showed me every tooth in his head. I said “OK, I hear you.”
The next day we euthanized him, and had he not been muzzled, when he was given the sedation shot, the veterinarian would have been severely bitten. He never relaxed, he never laid down, We had to lay him down, and as we administered the final shot, his feed were still splayed and rigid. I was there for the first and last breath. I know that he is no longer confused. He is running free in whatever form our animals receive when they die.
Brittney Ross says
Thank you for writing this… I have to make this horrid decision this week and I’m dying inside. Chloe is my life and I do everything for her. She is a great dane neo mastiff mix and her aggression has gotten worse in the past few months. I’ve spent over $1600 in training, I’ve tried medications, I keep her home so she can’t hurt anyone, but now she is starting to be aggressive inside the family. 10 people live here and she has now bitten 4 of us and with her being such a big dog I’m scared to death the next bite might send someone to the hospital. Rehoming isn’t a option as she doesn’t like anyone but me. Living in a muzzle is not a way of life or even in a cage I couldn’t do that to her. She almost died as a pup from septic arthritis. We dont know if her behavior all stems from that or if its a mental health issue. I’ve tried so hard to avoid this decision but the kids are scared to come out of their rooms. No one can come over. The one person she trusted to watch her she has bit so now I can’t go away because there’s nowhere for her to be. She has horrible separation anxiety and can chew threw a door knob in a matter of minutes. I can’t imagine my life without her I’ve cried so much the past few weeks knowing the time was coming. My vet is scared she will eventually kill someone because she is so big. When she decided to bite me the other day I knew it was a matter of time before it will be one of the kids he growls and charges at them thats how I got bit she went after one and I put my hand out to block her from getting him if I didn’t she would have bit his face…. I have people telling me to find a home but what if they wasn’t as careful as me and she got out and really hurt someone I couldn’t live with myself if that happened. Someone say try another trainer… well how many more we have been threw 3 already….. this is the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make and its killing me. I love chloe so much she literally is my life and I dont know what to do without her…
Natalie says
I always believed AGGRESSION was brought on by how a dog was treated. I was very wrong. Aggression can be genetic. We got two great danes from the same litter. We were so focused on health of the parents we did not tune in further to temperament. The father of our dogs was allowed to interact with us freely but the mother was gated off. We were able to say hello and pet her but I found out much later that she did not get along with the other dogs in the house and spent much of her time being separated from the pack. The breeder referred to her as a diva. Which really meant she did not have a desirable temperament. The breeder had this dog for two years and she knew very well that this dogs temperament would not be desirable. The first time I took my two puppies to the vet, Ace growled at the vet. The vet alarmed me to the fact that this was extremely rare for a 9 week old puppy to act this way and I needed to be very aware of the possibility that this could be an aggressive dog. Well, the two years that we had him he had incidents until the one day he attacked my weimaraner and she needed 8 staples in her ear. My vet said this would not end and a human could easily be next. I agreed with him comp;lately. We did get training for him but nothing could help because there was no warning to his aggressive behavior it was clearly a wiring(genetic) issue. We did euthanize him which is extremely difficult because as the owner you focus on the good of your pet but I needed to be responsible and look out for everyones safety.
Dawnn Cobb says
Monday Feb 8 was one of the hardest days for our family. This would be the day to bring Bruny back to the shelter to give him up! The first time we brought him in we felt bad about our decision to abandon him! That’s how we he felt! We had him since he was 6 weeks old! Never was he any way aggressive until about a year ago! A guy that knew us went to close to my husband and he jumped up and bit him near his armpit! He was required 2 stitches and meds! That mad me nervous,I didn’t understand how he could act this way towards anyone! He was spoiled rotten and even slept in the bed! A while after this I noticed different looks he would give towards anyone even my kids when they came near me or anyone he was laying with! A friend had leaned down to pet him and he grabbed her hair and was growling while shaking her hair in his mouth! That next day he went to the ASPCA for placement. They following day I felt so guilty and went back to get him,meanwhile they were neutering him that morning so we had to come back! When we returned many hours after the procedure he still hadn’t waken up! Very odd for a general anesthesia, we had to basically bring him back to life! We were told he had cataracts and a blood disorder and that he had serious alpha male issues! While waiting for a appt for a behavior specialist he started acting strange,jumping at people,growling and snapping even at me. I was very uneasy about this in fear he would bite my children! He would hide in his cage and not eat and even vomiting! We made a appt to see the people at the shelter! After going over his health issues and behavior issues they said it would be best to put him down! With his vision declining fast and the problem with the anesthesia last time,surgery wasn’t an option! So we decided to agree to have him put to sleep. It was a horrible decision but I realized that between his eyesight going fast,you could tell he couldn’t even see out of his left eye at all,and he had metabolic issues and behavior issues it was the best thing! We feel very guilty about it but I believe it was best for Bruny because he couldn’t go through any surgeries due to the previous complications! So I pray for everyone going through this situation,it is a horrible thing to go through with your loved fur pet!!! And it’s crazy because I never have a Monday off but this week I did! Maybe it was a sign…….
KC says
I came across this article when I seem to need it most. I rescued my Pitbull mix when he was just two weeks old…. long story short a friend of a friend had puppies and the mother killed off the liter leaving one who I took in very early on. I fed him from a bottle and nurtured him even when we weren’t sure he would make it. Here I am 4 years later (110lb dog later) with a heart-wrenching decision I thought I would never have to make. Over time I have come into countless altercations with Sonny biting both my boyfriend and me. Although it had killed me I knew when he was two years old it was best to get him help. We sent him away to a training facility for 2 1/2 months. Needless to say Sonny came back worse. Around year 3 he began experiencing something new. He would fall into a deep sleep and we would notice his body shaking uncontrollably. He would wake up and come right at us looking to bite. After a minute or so he would wake up confused as if he didn’t know what happened. Does any one know what this could be? After taking quite a few bites our vet suggested humanely euthanizing our dog. It has been nearly a year since then. Most recently we have moved and this seems to have upset our beloved dog. He has been more and more aggressive most specifically biting me twice in the past week. I find myself hiding my bites and bruises so no one can judge… I feel like I am in an abusive relationship… with my dog. I love him and only I know his heart and how sweet he can be. I find myself struggling. How much longer can I do this? My relationship and life has been taking it toll. I am scared to leave the house. I am sick to my stomach with sever anxiety to think of preparing myself for the next bite and how bad it could be. I always thought he was placed into my life for a reason. I believe by now anyone would have given up on him and I don’t want to give up. Am I being selfish to put him down? Did I not do everything in my power to help him? I am happy here there are those who know what it is like and I don’t have to be alone. There are people we understand and that speaks volumes. Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
KC says
I would also like to mention.. the quality of life for my dog has been weighing heavy on me.. He is unable to be around any other people besides my boyfriend and me. He cannot go for walks. He wears a muzzle and there is no controlling him. To take him out we take him into our tiny yard. Before hand, I need to scope out the surroundings. As I take him I pray that no one comes out or makes a noise or that another dog does not bark. If he hears something or someone he comes straight at me. Like I have read in previous posts my dog is extremely OCD. He needs a schedule. If you veer away from this schedule he notices and is not happy. With all the negative experiences he is smart.. he loves me and has been my companion. He has saved me just as much as I saved him. I don’t know if there is someone out there that can help us. The few times we were able to bring him to the vet he needs to be severely medicated. I have since stopped bringing him for check ups and hope he stays healthy and doesn’t have any issues. I do agree, it is a very isolated feeling when no one really understands what it is like.. to be trapped with such a hard decision to make. My daily life is dictated by my dog- but he has meant everything to me.
Trisha says
KC: I am so sorry. Without knowing more, it sounds as if your dog has a serious disease. It’s just one that manifests externally as behavior, like a tumor on the inside of him that you can’t see. Some of the episodes you describe sound like frontal lobe seizures, but your vet could tell you more specifically what s/he thinks is ailing your dog. Whatever it is, this is clearly a welfare issue for your dog… he is living a very, very difficult life, and I would think about putting him down as a potential way of easing his pain. I’m not there, and so can’t say too much more, but am so sympathetic to how hard this is. Just know that you are not alone, and that it is clear that you love your dog so very, very much. If you do decide to put him down, no one could fault you for it.
Natalie Hancock says
Wow, my mind says one thing but my heart says another. Alfie is our 7yr old JR but for the past 6yrs we have had to walk on egg shells. Our whole day from the minute we get up to going to bed revolves around him. What moods he in, his body language, his mind set. Alfie comes across as a loving waggy tailed small dog and cute too. But in our home its a different story. Our other JR is so scared of him he knows when not to cross his path or he gets it. I can’t count the times he has latched onto our Billy for no reason at all and I know in my heart that one day he WILL hurt Billy so bad that he’s going to kill him. He’s most aggressive towards evening. Snarling and growling at my husband or daughter and me too. Each evening his muzzle goes on and won’t come off until we go to bed. We have had all kinds of help trying to find the root core to his unpredictable ways but to no prevail. We know we need to put Alfie to sleep but each time we make that decision both my husband and I just break down crying, blaming ourselves “we have failed Alife”. Alfie is a needy dog, he’s jealous, nervous and has a screw loose. He has never bitten us only a couple of time when we’ve broken up a fight and the hands got in the way but their I go again making excuses for a dog I love very much but also hate at times. Our whole house isn’t normal. 99% of my husbands and I arguments are over ALFIE!!!!!!!
Marley taylor says
We have the most beautiful 3 year old border collie who is the gentlest, sweetest dog around people he knows. However, he is terrified of and aggressive towards strangers. We worked extensively with him and, away from home, he stopped reacting and seemed safe. We have accepted that within the house he will always need to be crated. We have moved home so he now has a paddock to run in. However, because we can no longer go on holiday we bought a camper van and a momentary lapse of concentration resulted in him biting a man. Two weeks later the police were called and although formal charges were made, he is now on a register.
I live in constant fear. All the usual enjoyment of taking my dog everywhere is no longer an option. I really love this dog but am also conscious that he is spoiling what could be the last decades of my husband and my last decades together.
Mandi says
We recently went through euthanizing a dog with a long history that began its life in a suburban neighborhood where the dog was allowed to break down a fence (that isn’t exactly a one afternoon undertaking) to get through the fence to kill a smaller dog on the other side.
The dogs original owners decided that the dog would do well somewhere out in the country. She was on a euth or remove order, since the dog she killed happened to belong to the HOA president in the neighborhood she was living in.
Unfortunately for all they did not disclose this dogs habits and history. Heck, we didn’t even get a real age. After the trailer shock wore off, about three months into having the dog in our home, we were left to discover all of these behaviors for ourselves and OH BOY were some of them surprising. Finally I called the “agent of the previous owner” who was a self declared “dog rescue” and found out that this was the dog that was on the “euth or remove order” and was animal, elderly and child aggressive – in spite of being represented as family friendly and great with other animals.
They knowingly took this dog to a “home in the country” where other animals, dogs, livestock and more importantly my daughter live, because they wouldn’t do what had to be done. A home in the country is no solution for a dangerous dog. How exactly is an environment rich with animal targets even remotely a good idea for a dog that is animal aggressive? I was keeping the doggy equivalent of a convicted serial killer on a line in my back yard hoping we could somehow NILIF and pack walk away the desire to stalk, chase, maim, kill and eat prey and the willingness to do whatever it took to break down barriers to that process and many successful rehearsals of the behavior to the degree of being an accustomed habit.
Needless to say I had a few choice words for that, but there are very few laws to protect someone adopting a dog. Essentially she could have said the dog was a unicorn and unless it were an issue of misrepresented BREED as in for show and papers, there was no recourse for someone who had unknowingly taken on a dog with a history of dangerous behaviors. Rescues wouldn’t take the dog, as that they are more concerned with the safety of THE DOG rather than humans. If the dog was contained, housed and fed humanely, there was nothing to rescue the dog from. We were on our own.
From what she did tell me after the fact, the dog had become the leader of the household – including its human residents and so long as she wasn’t challenged, she was successfully rehabilitated and unlikely to offend again. In all reality this dog spent less than two weeks in “rescue” before being declared rehabilitated and offered up to be rehomed by this “agent of owner” – with no disclosures.
My adventure It began by hiding the carcasses when she escaped and decimated my neighbors chicken flock. I was still early enough into this that I actually felt I was doing something to make the dog “not like” our yard and that maybe she was just looking for “her place” and got “distracted” See, I just had to put a grain of salt with three sets of words to really describe how naively determined I was that all dogs are just looking for love. I covered for her. I have no idea what happened to those chickens. It was my fault for taking the dog off of table food as she has previously been accustomed to in her previous home. She needed the protein.
Before I go much farther, our yard is enclosed with six foot tall chain link, framed in at the bottom – dig proof. This wasn’t your run of the mill “the gate didn’t latch” dug out a laying down hole and slipped out this was fence CLIMBING. Taking a running start and using her back legs to propel herself over the fence. In a misguided moment I figure the cone of shame might deter this. What you are envisioning right now is probably about right. She freaked, tore the cone to bits, climbed the fence and chased a cyclist. My fault right, she was upset about having something put on her neck. Nevermind that you couldn’t pay me to cut this dogs toenails. You couldn’t pay anyone else to either. Nobody is willing to get bitten trying to assert to an adult lab mix that this is the natural order of business.
A week later it was a jogger with a small dog. Fortunately no one was injured, just terrified. Mostly because they target was able to get inside another fenced yard and got help from my INLAWS. Yeah. Nice.
I was still firmly in denial. The dog just wanted to say hi. Yeah. She climbed a 6 foot fence and chased them 50 yards down the road to say hi.
We added a line and dog run to our outdoor security measures.
We got the escapes down to about once a month when she would break a line that was tested at 150lb. We replaced lines. She evolved a fighting dog scream. The blood curdling trill like shriek of an aroused pugilist. We moved livestock from a truck to the pens and the dog was throwing herself at the fences, attacking the fences with teeth and claws trying to get through. Fortunately she was on a shiny new line and it didn’t break.
She broke yet another line, climbed the fence and got into a livestock pen. Fortunately I was right on her heels and mad enough to blindly grab her and throw her back over the fence.
I tried taking her with me where I could at least keep an eye on her. She chewed through two leashes and escaped again. We had to get a leather, buckle (not clip) collar because she would chew through anything else. Snapping the clips on woven leashes and collars took less time than it took to blink. By this time I was over my belief that she just wanted to say hi. I had seen her stalking a neighbors child once and after that my eyes were open.
We walked her more – thinking maybe she just wanted to go exploring… One day she decided she wanted to go say “hi” to a rottweiler. (you can’t make this stuff up) I put her in a sit/stay and she went into a frothing spin cycle, trying to get to the hand holding the leash. I kept my arm fully extended at shoulder height, keeping her away from my legs and body and keeping my arm high enough that she couldn’t stay on her hind legs and fight her way to the dog being walked across the street and try to get me to drop the leash simultaneously.
After this, I was done. No more. I would not put myself or others at risk by taking this dog outside of a fenced enclosure ever again.
It took two more escapes before I finally said enough is enough. When you realize that you are living as a hostage to a dog who you can’t predict which way the dog is going to go and what the consequences are going to be, then you have to do for yourself what you would do for others. I would never expect anyone to live in FEAR of leaving the house for the chance the dog might escape and kill or injure someone, their pet, their children, their livestock, and to have to pray to God every time they leave the house that if the dog breaks out again, please let it be chasing someone who has strong dogsmanship and is a large imposing adult otherwise we will probably have a lawsuit on our hands.
When I pulled up to the local shelter for our Euth appointment, I felt very little besides relief. It’s finally over. Even a few months later that is still my feeling. Relief. Not having to worry about what’s next is such a weight off my mind that I wish I had the courage to have done it sooner and not gambled with the safety of so many others. We were BLESSED and amazingly lucky that this dog didn’t seriously hurt or injure us or someone else and I really regret my blindness during the time that I allowed that risk to go on.
When it comes to the point that you cannot safely contain or control the dog, IT IS TIME. How many times will you be lucky and escape consequences? When those consequences eventually happen, how will you live with that, especially given that you knew it was a serious possibility. That it could have been avoided.
When you are afraid of what you might come home to, it is time.
When the dog is not looking to increase the distance between itself and an object that triggers a response – whether you want to call that fear based or prey drive, but to CLOSE THE DISTANCE between itself and an object that has aroused it – offering pursuit for the purpose of attacking, injuring, maiming or killing, IT IS TIME.
Sally says
My husband and I adopted a dog, Thor, about nine months ago. His previous owners had placed an ad on Craigslist. We met Thor and his owner. They said they were moving into a city and couldn’t take him with them. That was a story we later learned was clearly a lie. They told us he was two, which, again, turned out to be false. They said he was great with kids, great with other dogs. We believed them. He licked us and seemed so happy to meet new people. Thor seemed sweet. We walked around with him for about an hour before we decided to take him home. They told us Thor was a Malamute, low content wolf hybrid.
Thor was great for the first couple of weeks. He wasn’t trained, but he caught on to sitting and peeing outside instantly when treats were involved.
We started having issues when we started training him to let us go out doors first. He did not like it one little bit. He would jump around and howl, but he didn’t try to bite then.
One day, we were walking him outside. Our neighbors were having a yard sale. They wanted to meet Thor, and, since he’d always been friendly, we took him in their yard. He darted after a stuffed dinosaur doll. Since he’d slobbered on it, we paid them for it. Once we got home, we gave it to him to keep. He instantly resource guarded that stuffed orange dinosaur. We were on our bed ready to go to sleep. Any time we moved, he growled and snarled at us. We eventually were able to move off of the bed. My husband grabbed the leash and got him outside, and I took the doll away. We began doing training exercises for resource guarding, starting with rope toys or tennis balls he didn’t care that much for. Any time we felt he was ready to have the dinosaur back, we found he was not. We called a local trainer, and they said what we were doing was exactly right.
About a month after we got him, we moved to a larger home. He soon began resource guarding me. If my husband came near me, Thor would growl and snarl at him. At this point, he still hadn’t bit anyone.
The first bite we had came when my husband was walking him down the stairs of our apartment to go outside. My husband fell and sort of knocked Thor down along with him. Thor bit his finger deep, almost all the way through. My husband patched it up himself, and he still has some nerve damage. We thought maybe Thor had been abused before and that he thought my husband was trying to hurt him.
After that came a number of bites to my husband, our friends and me. None of those were serious enough to warrant medical attention. Most came from situations where we tried to take something from him. A friend knocked groceries off of the counter and tried to catch the bag. Thor, already thinking those tomatoes were his, bit the friend on the arm.
Thor spent Thanksgiving at the kennel for a couple of days. They said he did well. When we took him back for Christmas, they were happy to see him. We got a call two hours later saying that Thor had bitten the owner and that we needed to come pick him up. The owner was an older man. He did go to the hospital for the bites, but he did not get any stitches.
Not all of his attacks or attempted attacks can be as easily explained. There have been several times when my husband walked into the living room, only to be faced with a growling Thor lunging right towards him. My husband will not walk around our home now unless he has treats in his pocket that he could distract Thor with.
Thor was not well cared for in his old home. When we took him to the vet for a checkup, he had a double ear infection, bladder infection, Lyme disease, and a staph infection. He was not fixed. His teeth, almost thankfully, are in terrible shape. He only has one canine remaining, which is certainly a part of why we haven’t had more serious bites.
We were prepared to put him down about three months ago. We told our friends. One of them mentioned that he knew someone who owned a wolf dog sanctuary, and he gave her a call. We cancelled the appointment and hoped we could get him in. A few days after we spoke with her, she was in a serious accident and was hospitalized for about a month. We still haven’t heard back from her. She said it could take time to find someone who would take him, but every day is a day of worry he’ll hurt us or someone else. We don’t have friends over in the apartment anymore. We live in a downtown area, but we do our best to walk him on less travelled streets. We no longer take him to the trails he loved for fear of the many illegally unleashed dogs.
For the most part, he is a sweet, loving boy. He has learned a lot and changed a lot. Fixing him did seem to lessen his tendencies to resource guard me, but we are still very much afraid. We’ve talked to trainers who have said we’re doing everything right. At this point, I am ready to put him down, but my husband isn’t. I really appreciate this article and the points listed. I think it and all of these comments have made me feel like we’ve been making the right choices so far and that, if we do put him down, it’ll be because it’s what is best for Thor and for our safety. I love this dog, and I hate to think that we’re giving up on him. I think he had a bad first 6-8 years of life, and I don’t think we can do much to change that.
Kathy says
We have faced and have made this decision for the 2nd time. We rescued a small am staff off the streets of Las Vegas estimated to be about 2 yrs old in 2004..the perfect ambassador for the bully breed until 8-9 years old. She started targeting one of our other dogs, attacking him visciously 3 times. “Managed” the situation by separating the victim from the attacker, spoke to friends who have years of experience and behaviorist who shared their experiences. Waffled back and forth about euthanizing an otherwise “healthy” dog. We paid the ultimate price by delaying taking the action we knew we should..she attacked another of our dogs while we were both out, broke his leg and severed an artery causing him to bleed out. Thankfully she did not harm any other pets but one paid with is life and we euthanized her losing 2 of our beloved pets. The guilt was almost unbearable as we let them all down.
Now we are faced again with a similar situation. A beloved member of our family who is fine until he isn’t which started seemingly out of the blue 2yrs ago. Vet says it is not medical but behavioral, gone through training twice and things continue to escalate. October of 2014 he mauled one of our small dogs, the quiet little lap dog. He mauled him again 2 weeks ago. We were lucky he did not kill him either time. This 2nd attack was much worse than the first as he was shaking him and did not want to release. He has had our Jack Russell in his jaws 4-5 times in the last year resulting in minor punctures and bruising, he’s a tough little dog but does not deserve this. I had been fairly successful in getting him to kennel when the situation would explode but it has become increasingly difficult. He’s knocked me over a couple of times leaving me vulnerable to him turning on me. 3 weeks ago when I attempted to redirect him and get him to kennel, stepping between him and our other dogs, he was snarling and snapping at me. He ended up grabbing my wrist bruising it badly and punctured a couple of my fingers. How can this be happening again! We chose not to take any action as we were getting ready to move to the country and tried to fool ourselves it would be better but neither of us trust him and the signs we are seeing tell us we are headed towards another escalation. We are keeping him separated from the others but he is now pursuing the cats who have been lucky enough to be quicker. 2 hrs on the phone with a behaviorist/canine psychologist experienced with aggressive dogs helped us face reality and make once again the toughest decision of our lives, to do what is best for all involved. Does it make it easier, in no fricken way. My husband put it to me this way…choose which one of our other pets you want to die. We are heart broken and devastated, feel like failures and are in total disbelief this is happening again. But we have been through the absolutely worst..having one pet killing another and walking into that devastation.
Anastasia says
I have euthanized my dog yesterday. With whom I spent 8 years. I regret this decision so badly that no words can describe my sorrow. I confess that I made this decision on impulse after being bitten on my hands multiple times and needed to go to hospital to treat it. But it was not the first time I was bitten, and I knew I could live with that. That’s why I regret this decision and it hurts so bad. He is small mixed malteses about 7kg and he would never kill anyone with his bite. He had an aggressive behavior and I had to have certain approach e.g. put a muzzle on when washing him etc. but it was possible to live and go on the same way. I don’t know why I made this decision yesterday. I tried re-training him, rehoming him – nothing worked. He bid my husband as well and would do to anyone in the family if not properly treated. So you had to have certain approach with him. But after all, after what I did I don’t think that all of that was the reason to put him to sleep. I’m devastated, my heart is bleeding and I’m blaming myself for such cruelty. How I could b so extreme? To love him so much and at the same time to take such drastic measures. Please if anyone would share will be much appreciated. I have spent the last two days beating up myself and crying and it cannot be stopped. I know I cannot turn time back to change everything. I wish I could. Thank you
PAMELA says
I am so sorry Anastasia, and you are not alone. I put down my Border Collie in February and I feel exactly the same way as you. You are struggling with your feelings for your dog on the one hand and doing what was right on the other. The two cannot be reconciled, and it seems like a betrayal. I know, as I am going through the same torment myself. It is a lonely situation for the one left i.e. you. Some people understand what you have done and why, but others condemn – their opinions are often hurtful and show they have totally misunderstood your decision – neither do they know what courage it has taken for you to make it. You are like myself and many others who have had to do this – it’s a sad lonely and difficult situation, and I sympathise with you. x
Myrrh says
I have been lying in bed crying as I have been reading these. Our 7 and a half year old mini Aussie, who is the smartest dog I have ever had has jumped up on the bed and is laying next to me. He is listening to me talk as I type this, without a clue of what I am thinking. Started off as an amazing puppy who love everybody. Gradually he became somewhat of a terror. We don’t have people come to our house because he can be vicious if he decides he does not like someone. And even if he does like them, he can just turn. I feel like we have been living hostage to him, as much as we love him. We are expecting a grandbaby in June, and there is no way in this world we will let him know baby. He doesn’t not like any child. I think tonight was the last straw, because for no reason, he bit our 22 year old daughter. It wasn’t the bite that scared me so much, as the viciousness that I saw happening when he attacked her. As well, it was the heartbreaking look on her face as she was trying to deal with the thought that this dog but she loves so much and takes for walks in the Hills and feeds and pets and babies, could do this to her. I can’t imagine not having Diesel with me, but I am terrified that he is going to seriously hurt somebody. We can’t give him to anyone else, he would hurt someone or someone would hurt him because of his behavior. We have tried a trainer, and that changes some small issues, but it does not change the underlying fear that our beloved dog is untrustworthy. It does not change the fact that we are afraid every minute that he will bite someone who may visit us. Like a prior writer said, i too fantasize about him developing cancer or something that would take this choice out of my hands, but I know it is my choice. We will all be heartbroken, but we will remember him. We will remember how funny and how smart and how much he loves us. I don’t know how I’m going to tell my husband and our children about my decision, I know all of our hearts will be broken. But, he is my dog, and I must make the decision. I don’t know how we’ll make it thru the pain of losing him… but I see no other choice.
Lisa says
I am heartsick right now. I just don’t know what to do. My dog killed my sister’s cat now she is absolutely insistent that I get rid of him
My dog is very protective of me and if he is sitting with me he will growl and bare his teeth and sometimes even snip. And he doesn’t like cats. My sister and I live together and she has a 15 year old cat. The cat always stayed in my sister’s room. Tonight my dog got into her room when a visitor didn’t close the door all the way. Now the cat is dead. My sister is distraught and absolutely convinced that my dog is viscious.
I love my dog and i feel like he gets upset in certain situations such as people coming near me or around food. I feel like while we had a horrible tragedy tonight I know the situations that are a problem for my dog. For the most part we manage to avoid them.
I think we might even be able to be helped by a trainer but finances have prevented that.
My sister is convinced he is a danger to my 3 children and the other 2 dogs in this house.
I feel really bad about her cat. But i don’t believe that means he is dangerous to the other dogs. He isn’t overly aggressive with them.
As far as the kids..they are getting older and they know how to avoid issues. My little one 8 years old likes to hug him and if he is 38th me he doesn’t like that. He growls n snarls n if she keeps it up he will eventually snip. I watch them closely and I AM working hard to teach my daughter not to hang on him and get in his face.
I don’t know what to do. My sister is threatening to move if I don’t get rid of him
I can’t afford that. I feel bad. I love my dog. I am sorry. I feel sick when I think about what my dog did. But I love him. I don’t know what to do.
Ken says
We are living this right now. We have a two and a half year old Bernese/Airdale (we think) mix, that our son rescued from Tennessee when Hugo was just a puppy. He has been a wonderful, loving dog 99.9% of the time we have had him, but we have an appointment tomorrow to have him euthanized. It is a very painful and difficult decision. Hugo has bitten me four times. The first two he only got my clothing, but on the third he latched onto my hand and left me with three decent puncture wounds. After that incident, we found a wonderful behaviorist and trainer, and had Hugo spend almost three months with her. She was amazing. She is amazing. We worked very hard with him when we got him home. We bought a treadmill for him to get exercise on when it wasn’t possible for him to get sufficient exercise. We muzzled him each day for a period of time to keep him used to it. He was doing great…until he snapped, again. Unprovoked. I went to take off his collar, and he came at me again. Partially got my arm, and tore my pants. So, we ratcheted up the training, and he was doing great…until he snapped again. Unprovoked. This time we thought we could explain it away based on what was going on. This past weekend we went away for three nights, and Hugo spent the time out with the behaviorist/trainer. They had a great weekend together. He was no problem at all. Wednesday she brought him home. She and my wife, and Hugo were chatting in our driveway until it was time for her to leave. As she went to say goodbye to Hugo, he attacked her. He was leashed, but was still able to get her. He left a few puncture wounds. After that incident, we made the decision. And quite frankly, it sucks. We love Hugo. He loves us. But we can’t risk that the next time he snaps, unprovoked, someone gets seriously injured, or worse. I know without a question that we are doing the right thing. I am convinced that there is something not right in Hugo’s wiring. And yet…I’ve been weeping over this since it happened. It sucks.
Lucy's Owner says
Thank you for your gentle, objective opinion. This can be so devastating. But we have to value our humans more than our dogs. My dog just attacked my dad, and after 12 years with her, we need to let her go. I’m more broken-hearted than I thought I would be, but this post gave me some clarity and closure.
Deb says
Thank you so much for this article. I needed this support. Unfortunately, last night I made the decision to euthanise my beautiful dog. We are a family with 3 children and had 2 dogs. My husband and I are experienced with working dogs, but in this situation we encountered a pup that was simply aggressive. We brought her home when she was 2 months and she was difficult from the beginning. She wanted to bite every dog she ever met and dominate every human she encountered. She was given such a quality life in our home and solid training, but yesterday afternoon she attacked our other dog brutally and as I held the children back, my husband tried to separate them and she turned on him. She bit his leg open and wouldn’t stop attacking. I’ve never seen anything quite like it. I now understand why my father said on the farm growing up, “Dogs are animals and people are people. Both are to be treated as such.” It was clear to my husband and I as soon as it happened that this was very very dangerous and our dog needed to be put down. When I spoke to 2 vets immediately after separating the dogs and locking away our aggressive dog, they both gave three options 1. rehome 2. dog behaviouralist 3. euthanise. Rehoming takes time and is high risk – as my father taught me well… a dog is a dog, not a human being. In this scenario, I would never risk a dog harming a human, never. I feel leaving a working dog in a cage is cruel, even for a week. Quality of life is extremely important, although her life was short it was well lived. The second option sat horribly with me. rehabilitation. Yes, mistreated animals, given the appropriate care, home and training could benefit greatly from this. However, I feel our psychology obsessed society is missing a major reality… this is an animal and if she’s an aggressive animal, sometimes that’s just understanding that with every life comes death and it’s appropriate timing. I believe she was indicating to us that she was ready to pass onto the next life. And finally euthanasia. Death is always hard, in every circumstance. But sometimes peaceful, done in love, with dignity and respect.
Mary says
This article and all of the comments have really helped me. As my family is struggling with this currently, I am so devastated. I have sympathy for anyone making this choice. It sucks so much.
So sad says
I’m so glad I found this article and the many comments. It has helped immensely to know I’m not alone in this horrible experience. I’ll try to focus on the peace my poor dog has found at last.
So Sad says
Thinking today that my intense sadness at making the decision is OK, necessary, and right. My dog is not suffering anymore and that’s the most important thing.
Annie says
Having scrolled down about 30 pp., it seems none of us are alone in this. Our dog looks to be a mix of Rhodesian Ridgeback/Rottweiler/German Shepherd/ —and because her jaw opens so wide and the end, perhaps a bit of pitbull. She is medium large, a shelter dog. She was aggressive to me as a puppy and unpredictably aggressive as she grew. We have another dog who is smallish and blind and she bullies him, but also loves him, takes good care of him. But when they play fight, it frightens our guests. There is no injury to either dog, and when Moki’s had enough of Maple’s aggressiveness, he barks and she stops. But when she is startled, she will nip/bark/growl (she is 4 years old now) at me and others. She has mounted people’s legs, she sniffs their crotches and kids seem wary of her, and many adults too. Last summer on a campout, she was on a leash around a tree (long leash) when a man walked by who was in our camping group. She lunged at him and growled and him and thoroughly scared him. When we walk her, she will always be aggressive towards any oncoming dog. Today, my husband had her on the leash on a walk. There was a dog barking at Maple and I suggested taking Maple off the leash so she wouldn’t be aggressive. Husband didn’t do that, and when the dogs got at each other, Maple attacked the dog by mounting it, covering it, and clamping her jaw down on the dog’s neck. She punctured the dog’s skin. The owner is okay with it, thank God. But we feel Maple might have “situational” aggression, i.e., when she’s startled or when she’s on a leash. But I have always feared her unpredictability. I wonder when or if she will attack a human and bite them. I’ve already seen her with a dog. What is your assessment? We have 2 teen boys. No little children. We’ve had animal behaviorists come and go throughout her life. Things got worse when I took a PT job, but I specifically did not accept a FT job b/c I feared Maple being cooped up and becoming more aggressive. In short: People have said to us they fear her; others are wary of her; other “dog” people who train, say she is aggressive. I am at a loss. Please help!
Elvis says
I fell in love with 10 month old Rhodesian/pit mix Rocky after I met him at an animal shelter. He was big , strong but yet gentle and I felt so much in me in him. Unfortunately he also came with major separation anxiety from prior abandonment and 3 different homes. At the time, my job wasn’t so demanding and I spend countless hours focusing on his obedience training and socializing. As the years progressed, his aggression towards dogs increased and he was showing signs of fear anxiety and hostility. When he was “in the red”, nothing I said would get him out of his trance. To avoid any further incidents I exercised and walked him when no one was in the park.
5 years later I met an amazing animal loving woman with 2 dogs. That woman, who is now my wife, loved Rocky more than I think I did. They became inseparable and they were cuddle buddies every time I left to work before I did. Even after he bit one of her dogs and sent her to the vet 3 separate times in 3 years, we spend thousands and thousands of dollars to rehabilitate him.
His fear anxiety evolved from dog to human. He bit both our walker and dog sitter hands to the point of needing to see the ER on separate occasions. We decided to start looking for places to possibly re-home him ,even though vets and trainers advised us to PTS. Our personal feelings and unbent loyalty and love towards him made us procrastinate on our attempts, especially since he was now muzzled.
This past weekend while I was doing carpentry in the garage, my 5 month pregnant wife was brushing his coat. I guess the sound of a power drill caused fear and he lunged at her face, knocking her back, and kept trying to go for her if not for me dropping everything and pulling him off and isolating him. She received a major bump on her head and a few defensive claw marks, but thankfully he was muzzled and she and the baby are okay.
The next day we took him to the vet and PTS. He passed calmly in the afterlife with his paw resting on my hand and my wife sobbing while hugging his big soft body.
It is probably the most gut wrenching decision I’ve ever had to make, but my family’s safety comes first. All the signs were there, even after all the training and love he was given. It could not heal the suffering his mind was undertaking. I have read every post here and its been very cathartic.
My wife and I miss our big boy so much and she is still inconsolable and suffering from panic attacks when she wakes up and he is not there. But we both knew it was the right thing to do. We are relieved that society, our family and especially Rocky, will no longer have to live in fear.
annie says
Elvis,
Do you think we are looking at red flags? My post is above yours. Maple has become more aggressive as the years have gone by—-what do you think should be our next step? A friend says watch the “Dog Whisperer” videos.
Elvis says
Annie,
This article has been the best blueprint for any decision you have to make.
I am not a professional but all I can tell you from first hand experience, the next time might not be such an understanding dog owner. Your dog will develop a record of bad behavior.
Don’t let your personal feelings cloud your responsibility to your family’s and society’s safety. It did to me and it almost cost me my wife and child.
If you love your dog, Don’t procrastinate like I did and really study your dog. Write down and create a log of any actions that seem inappropriate and share this with Your vet and behavior specialist. Good luck.
Consuela says
I think we have to stop using the polite and euphemistic word “euthanizing” and be honest about what this really is – the death penalty for dogs. We are making a decision under the assumption that we are higher species and that we have choice over the creatures in our care, who, unlike humans, do not go on trial. I am astounded by how many dog lovers, even spiritual people, feel that killing an animal for its behaviour is an appropriate action.
This post does try to be sensitive and offer other solutions, and states that – I hope – no human takes such a decision without great thought and pain.
Note that I did not say owners, for we cannot own another being.
But I think we don’t really understand that behaviours are linked to matters beyond the rather simple and base instincts that we allow for our non human friends. Animals are more sentient that we usually give them credit, and like all things, are affected by energy. Without referencing the fundamental life force of energy, we made poor diagnoses and decisions.
WHY are they violent? Is defence or pain or lashing out really something we should punish by death? I am often made afraid and angry by what we will put an animal down for, and the fear is – might that value and response translate to humans? I’ve known animals with epilepsy put down and that made me livid. Is it right to kill someone who has fought back, or who is reacting to abuse?
I think we need to get better at listening to creatures – all kinds – on a deeper level, and of having a wider range of reactions to issues than to end lives. Our stewardship of animals continues to appal me, even and especially those groups who claim to be for animals.
Kristeena says
We adopted a Shiba inu 5 years ago (we have had 2 rescues before and 2 other Shiba’s as well)
The rescue did not tell us she was an aggressive dog – but she had been re homed 5 times . I felt bad for her and when we picked her up she let me hold her and pick her up with no problem .
The problems started when we got home and realized the extent of her abuse she must of suffered.
She had fear of everything- creates – metal gates – food – night time . And she would lash out for no reason with no
Warning. I thought what have we gotten into – she had bitten me over 100 time in the first 6 months – on the hand and feet – breaking skin more than a dozen times . But I felt I could not give up on her – this may sound strange but she has a big heart and is super loving often.
Over the past 5 years it has been hard but her behavior had seem to get better – I thought if I showed her compassion and love that we could overcome her fears.
Even though the biting had decreased in frequency when it does happen it always draws blood .
I can’t even get out of bed with the lights off for fear she will bite my feet.
We have two other dogs that she aggressively bites at night as well.
I know I can not re home her but this last bite was very hard . I just don’t know what to do. We have worked so hard to give her a happy home and she is now 10 and I fear with age and eyesight she might get even worse.
I cry even at the thought of having her put down.
Holly says
I am so appreciative of this tender article. I have known so many people who have been bitten and seriously injured by a “misunderstood” dog whose owners “just did not have the heart” to part with. One woman was absolutely overtaken and mauled by a dog that the owner said was, “Usually sweet…” though all the classic signs of aggression were exhibited in the years leading up and all the behavior being “redirected” did not redirect an underlying issue. To release a dog is a responsible solution in some instances and a necessary decision when the animal has hurt and may very well hurt/injure again. Human life trumps a dogs and it takes a smart and kind human to protect others from animals that may not be able to be rehabilitated. One of the sweetest, most compassionate people I have ever known was a foster dog parent and said that her conscious would not allow her to allow a potentially lethal situation occur between humans and canines. It helps me to remember that there are (unfortunately) 1,000’s of dogs in shelters that are still in need of a good home.
Aaron says
We are dealing with this issue, with our 5 year old dog Buck. Buck is one of those family dogs that love and adore one person (me), sort of love a 2nd (my wife), but he is aggressive to people he doesn’t know. He’s never bitten anyone, but he has lunged at peoples faces and muzzle punched. He’s a very strong dog and if he ever decided to convert those muzzle punches to a bite it would be very bad.
We’ve been managing his issues by keeping him separate from guests or muzzled/leashed. But now we have a newborn daughter, and we don’t trust him around her when she becomes a toddler. We just don’t want to take that risk.
This is such a gut-wrenching situation. My wife really had to put her foot down to even get me to agree to re-home him, but we soon realized that he’s not really adoptable with his issues. We’d basically need him to be adopted by a professional dog trainer. I’m not sure if you can train a dog like this to not behave this way around guests.
I thought I had made some headway with him, because I got him used to 3 different people who had been staying with us, so I foolishly let my guard down a bit and he lunged at someone else. He also has not shown any sign of aggression to our daughter yet, which makes this decision more difficult.
I never thought I’d have to make a decision like this. =( We raised him from a pup and I love him dearly.
Lexie says
Today we made a hard desicion. My heart was so heavy as we had to put down our aggressive blue pitbull dog only 3 yrs old. We adopted him from people who we were told he just needed a home in the country. He got very protective and started lunging at people and there faces when they would come to our home. He ended up biting the fedex guy. Months later we found out he was abused and although we fixed him alittle and got him healthy we just couldn’t keep him in fear that he would cause a lawsuit someday…something we just couldn’t afford. We tried to find him a home but with a history like his..noone wanted him. He will truely be missed. My heart is very much so in my throat as in my eyes he was just a puppy yet. This was not an easy thing and i have many who are mad at me. But i feel this was the safest route for everyone.
Paul says
thank you thank you so much for your article. I had to put down my Bulldog Pit mixafter nearly two yearsof kind corrective action. but it just did not work and I still feel horrible. your comments and viewpoints have given me some relief thank you again sincerely Paul
Deborah Gallup says
I have mu Trixie who is 5 years old.. She has been thru a lot with me. 3 moves cross country, and some difficult times. Buddy was 13 when I had to put him down last September… Since then we got Charlie in December 1015. In the last two months Trixie has gotten very aggressive to me, Charlie and Sarah – neighbor girl who walks her daily. Trixie has bitten me twice and attacked Charlie multiple times. So panicked she will kill Charlie.. After the bite this week, made the decision to put her down. Trixie is loving and will turn on a dime in the last two month, me just trying to get her to go outside. She would prefer to just stay under my bed, and potty in house consistently. I have tried everything that I can without spending money I don’t have – to work with her, but I cannot handle the aggressive behavior. Had 4 malteses in my life, Nikki had a seizure – had to put her down, or spend 10000.. for surgery with a 10% chance of life, fluffy – lived till 14 when she had diabetes and seizure at 14 – put her down to take her out of pain, buddy lived till 13 – only 12 teeth, blind and finally put him out of pain… Trixie and maltese/schnauzer – has become so aggressive – made the decision to put her down, as it affects me, sarah and anyone around Trixie. Banfield doctor today – refused to put her down, “said I should spend money on behavior and /or find someone else to take her” – I now have to live with the legal issues of attacking sarah again, or anyone else. I don’t know what to do….
Donna says
My dog (my best friend) is only 2 years old. He loves me, and is so loyal and gentle, and loving to ME. He has however, bit numerous people, and in fact has left deep puncture marks with scars on my 6 year old. We have been working as hard as possible to help him overcome this aggression, to no avail. He never bites just once…it is usually 2-3 bits in rapid succession within seconds. He holds on and pulls. He sounds like he is trying to tear the victim apart. He is healthy, playful, eats well, sleeps, exercises. Yesterday he went after my daughter (10) again. He cannot be trusted with family that lives in the home. He lunges and will definitely bite a passerby. He goes crazy when someone visits. He does not have a traumatic history, in fact I have had him since he was about 9 weeks old. I cannot afford an expensive behaviorist. I live on social security. But we have read, researched, and watched numerous videos on strategies and work really hard to follow the examples. But now, I feel as though I am being irresponsible, and allowing the threat to continue. I am the only one that is safe with him. I am afraid he will seriously injure my little ones, or someone else.
I cried myself to sleep, because if you could see how he is with me…anyway, I couldn’t ask for a better companion for myself. I made the decision to call the vet about euthanization. I was turned away by 3 vets because of his age. Now what do I do? I cannot rehome him, shelter him or afford the exorbitant cost of a behaviorist (which does not guarantee results). Shelters will not take him. Re homing him would be just as irresponsible because he is very unpredictable and shows no warning (no growl, head or tail down). He just attacks.
It was so hard to come to my decision…and now it seems that the dogs life is more important than the childrens or other peoples safety. I love my dog so much. I am heartbroken to even think about this. But I don’t feel like I have a choice.
I adopted my two little children from DCF. If they saw the scar on my little guy, and found I did nothing to keep him safe…OMG.
I don’t know what to do.
Aaron says
For those that say humans don’t have the right to choose to put a dog to sleep, what’s is the alternative solution when the dog can’t safely live with humans? If we follow that line of reasoning, it would mean that we should release these dogs into the wild. But they would die of starvation in the wild, which is a slow and uncomfortable death.
Aaron says
Donna, and Deborah have you tried your local humane society? We just had our dog Buck put to sleep today at the Humane Society (wrote my story June 9th if you would like to scroll up and read it). Needless to say I’m in tremendous grief and anguish over this. But owning a dog with aggression issues seems so unwise. You can’t keep your dog and child separated 24/7, nor can you guarantee that an expensive trainer or behaviorist will render the dog safe. And as you said, rehoming an aggressive dog isn’t ethical either for a number of reasons.
Christine says
This article is one of the only things that has helped me cope. Knowing how people judge has left me with no outlet so I figured I would write my story here and maybe find some solace in it.
I got my wonderful puppy from a colony when he was 8 weeks old. Prior to us picking him up we were told that a young child had abused him (at the time I did not realize the lasting effects). He was a border collie X with German Shepard (around 90lbs). He was incredibly intelligent and easy to train. When he was about 3 months old we started to notice a lot of resource guarding to the point where we could not be 10 feet away from his bowl with out him wanting to attack, I have a scar from these attacks. At 6 months old he was neutered(hoping it would help) and went through 4 weeks of intense training. This training help immensely and in all honesty probably allowed me to have my wonderful dog in my life for even longer. He would no longer resource guard in fact he wouldn’t eat unless my hand was in his bowl, i had trust again. But he still had extreme fear and anxiety and on more than one occasion bit someone who was around him that he was not always around, this including my mother who had came over to let him out to pee one day was bitten with many punture wounds to her hands just for opening the deck door. I spent countless hours training him, consulting with the trainer, vet (anti- anxiety medications) and even muzzle trained him(about 30 minutes a week). Both trainers and the vet had suggested euthanasia but left the choice up to me stating ‘some dogs just aren’t wired right no matter what you do’ Because of all the time I put into helping him cope I believe I grew an extreme attachment to him. He was an amazingly fun loving, happy, loyal and obedient dog when he was around just me. When he would bite someone it was scary he would bite multiple times and make a sound like the tazmanian devil. Once the event was over he would ‘shake’ out of it and you could just see in his eyes that he felt terrible and had no control over what just happened, it would break my heart. This was when I knew I could no longer ethically re-home him. We live right close to a school yard and I would always fear a child would hop our fence to retrieve their ball. We became prisoners in our own home. We could not have company over and I could only take him for walks in town at night, I was fine with this as it meant I could keep my dog and my companion. Muzzle training became a time when I would groom him, go on walks and just play in the yard. A couple days ago while he was muzzled he started to try and attack me when I was trying to remove the muzzle (for some reason I could no longer go close to his face with the muzzle on). This was when I knew the muzzle would no longer be my ‘safe-guard’ for vet visits and other controllable circumstances and once that muzzle came off it would never go back on. I had a moment of clarity and called the vet and had my amazing baby boy put to sleep at the young age of 2 for the safety of himself and the public surrounding him. He even tried to attack the vet (muzzle on) When she tried to give him a sedative. When he was put to sleep he was so calm and peaceful and in that moment I felt relief. It has been 4 days now and I feel nothing but guilt, shame and anger at myself for making that decision. The only relief I feel is that I didn’t wait until the next inevitable attack or until he mauled a child to put him to sleep. This decision is something I would not wish on my worst enemy. I always said I could NEVER eauthanize an animal unless they were extremely ill and I was ending there pain and suffering. Until this situation happened to me.
Katie Ulrich says
I have to put my dog down. I know I have a choice, but I also don’t have a choice. His aggression appears even in controlled environments. It’s been getting markedly worse. The hard part for me that I love him so much. He attacked another dog, known to him, on Friday. (It’s now Sunday) I have been crying for three days. I don’t know what my life will be like without him. In a way I might feel relief as I won’t always be worried about what I might come home to. (sorry bad to end a sentence with “to”.) I won’t feel anxious when I see other dogs, or when children want to pet him. I am terrified of how sad I will be, and I think I will feel guilty. I just can’t chance him hurting someone. Despite all of my reading and interventions, I can no longer predict what might cause him to become aggressive. I feel it would be extremely irresponsible to keep him alive.
Ann MARTEL says
I have the opposite issue- I have a dog we rescued from a high-kill shelter. We did not have any information on him other than he is around 5 yrs old and a border collie mix. He fit in immediately to our home. Has been great with us, relaxed, low key dog. The grandkids came over and he was amazing- jumped up on the couch and just snuggled down with them. So loving on every front- not aggressive at all to strangers or other dogs. Then, when I was moving- he was sleeping sound on the couch and I, stupidly, went to kiss him on his head. He woke startled, and bit me enough to draw blood. He felt so bad. Then, last Wednesday the grand kids were over for dinner and we had some other friends/family over, so it was a bit noisy. When it was time for th grand kids to go home, our 4 year old grand daughter was giving everyone hugs and kisses and she of course went to give them to the dog who bit her twice in the face- requiring stitches and missing her eyes by centimeters. I really am fighting to re-home him because I don’t believe he is a threat but I am being just castigated by my step-daughter and her mom about how I am not taking the injury seriously and the dog will bite again. Those moments haunt me- I was right next to my grand daughter and couldn’t stop it. But I believe in my hear of hearts he can be a loving addition to someone’s home.
Anonymous says
Wow. So thoughtfully written. I recently had to make this dreadful decision. We rescued a dog that was about to be put down just because the shelter didn’t have space. He also had pneumonia. As soon as he got home, in a day or two I realized that this overly mellow dog wasn’t just transitioning, he was very ill. I took him to the vet and $600 later, my handsome boy was healthy and eating and finally showing us his personality. Unfortunately, part of that personality was a very aggressive dog to anyone and anything that wasn’t myself or my two children. My family had a vacation coming and we tested him out at this great doggy hotel. Within an hour of dropping him off, they called me and said he had to be picked up. Staff was trying everything from chicken to bacon and he wouldn’t stop lunging at them. Call it defensive, call it fear based, the consequences are the same. I ended up finding a kennel that was set up so he would have a place to use the bathroom, separate from his main “living” area, and no staff woukd ever have to make contact with him. So while staff was safe, I felt awful that my baby had to be ignored. If he only knew how much love he would get! A couple of months and three bite incidents later, last to my 7 year old son, I felt I was officially faced with this horrid decision. I did think how happy is he really? He is constantly stressed out, unless he couldnt see anything outside the windows and it was just us inside. I couldn’t keep a muzzle on him for longer than 2 seconds. It was becoming unmanageable and dangerous. I made the appointment. Talked to the vet while I bawled my eyes out. I held my 70lb baby in my arms on the cold vet room floor while his sedative kicked in. I continued to hold it, while releasing shrieking sobs as he was officially put to rest. I’m crying now as I type this. Since then, I have been ridiculed, harassed, degraded, called names and told I should just go burn in hell for making this decision. As if I don’t hurt enough. It’s so easy to point fingers until you find yourself in that situation and you realize you are out of options. Thank you for writing this. I am a huge animal lover and it’s such a conflicting situation to be in. How could I have saved him from being put down and now I am the one having to decide to put him down? It leaves me speechless.
Maureen Steffen says
Does anyone know of a support group for this specific kind of pet loss? I have been alone in my grief and found some comfort with a grief counselor, yet this pain has so many sides to it…it seems only those who have been through this can truly understand..I will leave my e-mail here if anyone can share where there might be this kind of support. Thank you, sincerely, -maureen
Lisa white says
I read the article, gave me the answers I needed. I got a dog who was never shown love,alone all the time. A terrer. He has been with us for over 10 yrs. He attacked a little girl 5 yrs ago and I was going to put him down but got someone to help me understand why he attacked her. It appeared she put her hand on my leg.
We found that no matter what we tried nothing worked. I didn’t have the heart to put him down. If we had company over he was muzzled all the time or put in another room.
Now we have a big yard and he is now growing and trying to attack walkers passing by.
I think it’s time to put him down. I can’t take yltge chance of him breaking my fence and a leash to get at someone. It will be a sad day for us when it happens.
Anonymous says
I absolutely love all animals and of course no one wants to put their dog down. My parents got a pitbull lab mix when he was about 6 months we really believe he was abused so my mother of course wanted to save him. It is now 7 years later and he has not changed he has bitten my father on many occasions had him on the floor several times. It seems he only attacks my father I don’t understand why all my dad would do is walk over him in the living room and bam he has his leg. My mom is an animal LOVER big time I’m so lost on what to do I hope we can figure it out but I know it’s not ok for this to he happening my dad is a diabetic and doesn’t heal fast anymore so I am very worried about him right now the most resent attack was Friday night on his had needed stitches. I’m disgusted and wish there was another way because all animals arE precious to me. This stinks
Vicky Van Patten says
I am currently facing this situation with my 5 year old Great Pyrenees/Chow mix. I rescued him from a local rescue when he was 1 year old and honestly at that time he was like a wild dog…friendly, but NO training at all!! I took him to obedience school and he began to be much better in the house and with people. He’s always loved all dogs (big and small) – never been an issue with other dogs at all….he gets along great with dogs of all sizes. He has extreme fear of thunderstorms and because of that I started giving him Acepromazine (at the recommendation of my vet) to help relieve the stress. He did not react well to the Ace and became very aggressive towards my daughter. I then did some research on ACE and found out that it can cause hallucinations and put the dog in a comatose state while their brain is still totally awake. So I immediately stopped using the ace, but the aggression did not stop. I spent more than $1,000 taking him to behavior therapists and working extensively with him to try to help him through this. I have been able to get him almost back to normal with me….but ONLY with me – he still HATES my daughter and he HATES my grandson. My grandson is autistic and is now 5 years old….my daughter and my grandson live with me. We have been successful so far to keep my grandson away from my dog with the aggression, but that is beginning to change and we feel we are prisoners in our own home. We have gates everywhere (tall metal dog gates) – but my grandson has begun to climb those gates and has no understanding of consequences and I am so fearful that he will get in the room with the aggressive dog and I’m fearful of what could happen. My dog gets boarded at a farm with 30 other dogs and they all roam freely on an acre of land….he loves it….I’ve asked this person, who boards him, if she would be willing to take Crosby (my dog) but she can’t because of liability with her business (she boards dogs). Due to the safety of my grandson and my daughter and the fact, that no one can take him because of the aggression, I am facing the decision of putting him down. I have tried to get him in a rescue for dogs with aggression issues, but they all want $5,000+ that I don’t have. It’s absolutely killing me because I have poured so much into this dog and he and I have a pretty good relationship. I can’t groom him, can’t trim his nails, and can’t sit with him and pet him and love on him like I can my other two dogs…but we have a mutual respect for each other that allows us to co-exists and I can pet his head and kiss his face without lingering. It has, however, begun to be a dangerous situation for my daughter and my grandson. I wish things could be different, and I’m really struggling with this decision because as soon as I make the decision, Crosby starts being very fun-loving and such a good boy. It’s almost like he has a split personality. Anyway…it is such a hard decision to make and one that is tearing me apart….
Paul says
Sadly we had to have our 3 year old cocker spaniel put to sleep today. He had bitten my children and myself several times, we had a dog behaviorist come but it didn’t help much, I got bitten while trying the training exercises. He tried to bite the dog trainer as well. It was just a question of time before he bit someone else.
It was very sad, I stayed with him until he fell asleep. I also feel relieved that I won’t have to be walking in eggs and be on alert all the time worrying if he’s going to bite my kids again.
Amy says
I am going through that same heart breaking thing. I have a 1 year old pit Bull X with a retriever. 2 years earlier i put my other dog down to old age and being very sick. So 2 years later i was ready To have another furry friend to be apart of mine and my sons family. Looking online i saw couple selling thèse very adorable puppies i fell inlove with the one i ended up getting. When picking her up and seeing her for the first time i did notice some Behavioral issues .. But i thought positive that i would be able To change that. I was wrong. I have tried everything To house train her. Thé (Canal )everything ontop of Whats out their To help with that… One year later she still does 1 and 2 in the house. I do take her for runs my son and i do take her for walks.and that hasnt helped. Her other issue is she does have aggression To her. My son can not play with her because she will come at him over and over and she has bitten him where she has drew blood nothing where he has had to go To the hosptail thank god. I have had a few close calls with her myself. She like To get in Thé garbage which i have been making sure that she is not able To get into it again. If she has anything in your mouth and it something that she shouldn’t have or something that is dangerous to her To take it from her she will not only growl she will show her teeth and thé min you stick your hand To get it out of her mouth she will go for your hand. I have seen her drag on of mine cats down the hallway by their neck. That cat can do anything. She has even placed her mouth around my other cats head and has started To bite down on it. Cauasing my cat again to not being able To défend her self. She has bitten one of my sons friends arm that left a pretty nasty burse. I have been looking for other options but no one is willing to take her. For me its very counfusing for me as I have growen attached to her and do love her. She has put as in a position where my landlord has been giving me short time frame to either I find this dog a home or my son and I will be forced to move she this dog has done some major damage to the house outside and in . I apologize for all the read but I am just looking for some advice as I am considering on laying her down to sleep as soon as possible
Nicole says
I have never been so relieved to stumble across an article in my whole life. Today 08/15/16 I have had to make the choice to put my beloved puppy Ronon down. I haven’t stopped crying since Saturday when the horrible accident occurred. It all started in 2010 when we rescued Harley from being put down. Took her to the vet who told us she was fixed and showed me the scar from the surgery. Long story short in 2012 we took her to the vet due to tremendous weight gain. Surprise she was pregnant. 13 puppies pregnant. That’s how we ended up with Ronon. He was a sweet dog to us. A few times when people had some thing in their hand (like food or one of his toys) he would nip their hand never mine or my husband. (Actually anytime my hand was near to his mouth for medicine or anything he was always careful never to bite me) He was a beautiful boxer Irish Setter mix. He also had severe anxiety issues with storms. Any way back to the story… on Saturday we had friends over and their 2 year old daughter. She was feeding the dogs treats and everything was fine for a while. I was in the kitchen preparing dinner when I herd their daughter scream. I walk in and Ronon had bit the child’s face and blood was everywhere. We rushed the little girl to the hospital (she required stitches he bit a chunk of her lips out). I felt so horrible. Here they were at our house for fun and it turned into an unbelievable nightmare. Because of this we had to make the decision to put him down. I will be reminded of him every day and it’s hard knowing he won’t excitedly jump on the bed to wake me up for the day, or when ask do you want a treat 2 waging tails won’t be waiting for them. Harley and Ronon looked so much alike that everytime I look at her I will see Ronon as well. I had to make this decision to make sure it never happened again. The bite was so close to the little girls eye and any higher she would’ve lost her eye. In order to be a responsible human being and to make sure no more people were bitten or injured (in case he even escaped our fence) I had to. I miss him and always will.
Nicole says
Oh and Ronon had training as well. Forgot to mention that.
Tanja says
I would like to thank you for your non judgemental and compassionate approach I have just had to put to sleep my 10 mth old cockapoo the heartbreak guilt and torment are over whelming and all I want is my dog back home even though in my heart I know I’ve made the right decision my head is full of guilt and such sadness I don’t think I’ll ever recover.I had to do what was right by my dog I could see he was in torment he would constantly pace wall lean and he had a vacant look in his eyes it was raised he could have had syringomyelia I could have delt with all that but he would go into fits of rage and bite at whatever body part he could get lunging and pursuing you even when you tried to get away if you left the room and returned he would carry on he bit me and all of my three boys and bit through one of my sons lip we were covered in bruises yet he was adorable. I tried a dog trainer and behaviourist nothing worked and advice was to have him put to sleep yet I lived in hope he would change I recently found out he was from a puppy mill although I brought him from a family home a loving one with children other animals I thought I was getting a well balanced pup I’m no idiot but I had know idea people did it from there home totally shocked I was fooled but more shocked that people would breed such unbalanced pups just for money the result heart break for my children the torment my poor dog went through as something wasn’t wierd right with him and the fact I had to make such a awful decision totally disgusting what humans are capable of . I felt I was between a rock and a hard place keep him alive n risk serious non reversible injures to myself boys or someone else or the torment and guilt I had to take his life I’m utterly distraught but I had to put safety of others first I just wish my vet had been more like you in her out look and compassion it wasn’t a decision I took lightly and I had explored every other avenue .I made not my first choice but the right choice the guilt and torture of my decision will rob me of my peace forever I am relieved my dog is at peace but the pain and whole left in my heart is unbearable I thank those non judgemental people out there this truly is one of the hardest decisions a person in this situation will make
Jeanine Yandora says
Are there any social media sites where we can discuss these situations with each other? I am thinking about putting my German Shepard down. I adopted her 10 years ago from a no kill shelter. One month later she tried to bite my cousin when I was in the other room. Soon after that she was reactive to most strangers. I tried getting her into group training, but the recommended 1:1 with a behaviorist. For several years, I was able to hire an in home petsitter whom I trusted. When she was done, I did 1:1 sessions with a behaviorist who also owned a kennel. That kennel was run as a tight ship. Everyone knew the rules to keep every pet safe. Now the kennel is under new ownership with new staff. The new staff does not use caution when they are brining my dog out to me. They have brought my dog out before I am ready and when other people are in the office. This is unsafe. I no longer trust them and the owner has not been receptive to my feedback. It took a lot of work to acclimate my dog to that kennel, I don’t think the dog is capable of going to another shelter. I also don’t think I could find another shelter that I would trust to keep the dog, workers and visitor safe. Dakota was kenneled for the last 5 years with no issues. She also got groomed. I just don’t know of any places where they run a the kennel with rules that are followed 100% of the time. Recently, I started bringing the dog up to the cottage. She recently lunged at the 90 year old neighbor without warning. I’m considering putting her to sleep because I have tried everything. This dog cost me $1000 plus last year in boarding. I’m tired of investing so much in this dog and not having a dog that I can enjoy the activities of my day with. The only thing that makes me consider keeping the dog is the fact that I live very close to an inner city. The dog provides me with protection, but I could be protected with a different nonreactive dog in the future.
Any feedback will help. What things do you ask the vet to make euthanasia a beautiful moment? I want to be there with my pooch in her last moment, but how will I do that safely?
Martha says
Thank you for this wonderful article. It makes me feel a little better knowing that I’m not the only one in this position. I live in the suburbs outside of Houston and everyone around me seems to have perfect and well behaved dogs. I have 4 of my own. A Rottweiler, an Australian shepherd(whom I saved from a shelter from being euthanized due to his epilepsy), a chihuahua, and a border collie mix. The border collie we rescued from an abandoned home in Houston. He was chained, dirty, malnourished, infested with fleas/ticks, and had a broken tail. When we took him to the vet they guessed he was about 1-2 yrs old. At the time we only had the Rottweiler. When we brought him home the Rottie fell in love with him right away. Everything was perfect. Fast forward 2yrs. It almost seemed as if someone turned on his aggression “switch”. He has never given any warning signs in any of the incidents that occurred. They’re just unexpected, all of a sudden type of attacks/bites. He first bit the Rottie. He was isolated and muzzled for a while, but after a few months of no incidents we decided to put our guard down just a little. Big mistake. After that it was me, then my brother, my sister, mom and dad, as well as the other 2 dogs. He has bit the Rottweiler several times. Our injuries (including the other dogs) have been to the point where we’ve had to visit the ER. We looked into behaviorists and realized how expensive they are. The shelters won’t take him, and it would be unethical to re-home him knowing how aggressive he is. Most of our friends and family know of his aggressive ways and most of them judge us because we’ve put up with it for so long. We’ve finally come to the decision that is best to put him down. I love him so much and feel so guilty because of the fact that he was in such poor condition and I could tell he had been abused when I found him. I gave him a second chance at life. And for what? For me to turn around and take it away? This is probably the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make. The only thing that makes me feel a little at ease is the fact that if I had never stumbled upon him, chances are, he would’ve died in a very slow and miserable way. Im glad he got to experience what it feels like to be truly loved and cared for. And instead of a lonely painful death, chained up in an old abandoned house, it will be pain free, surrounded by the people who loved him the most.
Louise says
Please help!
I rescued a beautiful victorian bulldog called henry 4 years ago and i love him to bits. Indoors he is the most loving and gorgeous dog and would never hurt me but I cant take him out the door. He attacks anyone and everyone including children and has to be muzzled and restrained.
I am now 6 months pregnant and terrified that he might hurt my baby as he is so unpredictable and has lashed at children before.
My heart is breaking as he is 10 years old and I know it will be impossible to re home him.
I know I am going to have to put him down but how can I live with this decision when he is healthy, but can I take the risk of him harming my baby.
This is so stressful. Id appreciate some opinions
Chelsea says
I know this article is somewhat old, but thank you so much for the compassion and understanding. My boyfriend and I had to make the very difficult and heart wrenching decision to put our dog to sleep recently and I was shamed by people for the decision. It’s so hard being judged when you are already devastated about having to make such a choice.
Our dog was a Pitbull that had never been socialized by the previous owner. She was just kept in the backyard. We did not know she had dog aggression until she attacked and almost killed a family member’s dog.
After that happened, we observed the behavior she would show when she would see other dogs during walks. She became extremely anxious it was very obvious she wanted to attack them. We also started noticing the behavior when she would see small children.
We talked to numerous trainers who would cost a fortune and we were told training would not be a guarantee an incident wouldn’t happen again. We also researched many rescue centers that could potentially rehabilitate her (who would not accept her due to her history of an attack), and also found that if we took her to a regular shelter they would immediately put her down due to her history.
As devastating as it was, we decided that we just couldn’t risk another animal or potentially a person getting hurt by our dog and it was our responsibility. We decided to euthanize her humanely at a vet so we could hold her and be in the room with her.
I know many would not agree with our decision but we put a lot of thought and consideration into it – probably one of the hardest things I have ever done. I hope people can be a little more compassionate about people in these situations.
June C Long says
I have been there and it is heartbreaking. I was supposed to foster a Golden Retriever puppy 5 mo. old but fell in love with him and so the story begins.
He was from a puppy mill in Lancaster, PA. I already have 3 golden rescues and thought no problem he is adorable/shy we can do this. When we got home he went to our fenced in yard to relieve himself and get familiar with his new home. Then we let out our other dogs and all went well until the next morning. I put them all out after they had their morning meal and he attacked all three of them. No one was hurt this time but a few days later he went for our Erica 13+ and opened up her neck. The vet said nothing about this except they are dogs…REALLY! After that happened we kept him in a kennel in our dining room and would only leave him out by himself for about 3 months and then slowly had him with our Lennon who was our youngest and felt secure about them getting along. Our older dogs did not have any contact with him and he never went for humans until July 22, 2016, my birthday. My granddaughter came over with our great-granddaughter 7 years old. She left to get lunch and my great-granddaughter wanted to see our puppy ( now a big puppy) He was in the yard in his pool so we went out to see him. Well he barked at her and she screamed and with that, he grabbed her by the back of her head and threw her to the ground. I could not get him off of her so I threw myself on top of her. He stopped and she kept saying Nannie, I am bleeding I said I know but we have to wait until he is out of sight.
We got her to the hospital, she had so much damage 50 sutures. I went into shock and was also admitted. I know you bleed a lot from the head but there was blood everywhere.
I pray nobody ever has to go through this and the hardest part was my dog was in quarantine for 10 days and the 7 more because it is a law in NJ before he was PTS.
I still Love and miss him, he was a puppy mill dog and not his fault for the way he was brought into this world. Peace be with you, Julian!
I want to Thank each and every one of you for posting your stories. I was on medication and therapy but it didn’t help. Reading all the post and having God in my life has.
Sam says
I have a jack russel shes 18 months old i had her when she was 4 weeks old the breeder i had her off told me that the mother had dis owned the pups and they were weend i had no reasons not to believe her at the time. The last couple months shes gone very agressive if she slept by the side you and you moved she would attack i have a 4 year old daughter and she bit her a few months back but we all know how kids can be and my little one as always been told dont touch her food and she give her a crisp n decided she didnt want to give her the crisp so the dog attacked my daughters hand i just put it down to my daughter teasing her and that they were both in the wrong yesterday i was cuttin the grass and i moved the grass with my foot she attacked my foot and now today she av layed by the side me and attacked my hand not enuff to have stitches but i have got 5 holes in my hands today as been one the hardest things i have had to consider in havein out dog put to sleep and its even worse that i have to wait till tomorrow for it to happen i know its for the best and im doin it for my daughters safety but only the last couple months i found out that the breeder i had our dog off didnt dis own her pups they let the mother out and took the pups away cause the mother is agressive now i was never told this i had found this off some one who went to buy a pup from her and she told her she never told me even when i took my daughter to see the pups i am heart broken shes such a lovely dog when she wants to be she does paw sit high five this is killing me and i cant imagine how my daughter is gonna be when she comes home from school tomorrow and sees her dog isnt here shes already had so much to deal with as i lost my baby her sister jan 2015 i went to hosp and the baby never came home with mee i just feel like this is gonna be something thats gonna really get her upset another thing thats here n goes sorry for the life story just had to get it out there that haveing a dog you love and a baby you love is not much difference i really wish i could done more 🙁
Mary says
Thank you for this article, as there really isn’t much out there for these situations. We have recently had to put our little buddy down due to aggression problems. It was the hardest decision we could make. He was just under 10 years old and we have been with him his whole life. However from a small age his aggression showed. You could not put your feet near his face or he may bite, you could not rub his ears are he may bite. He also developed a hatred for other dogs around 2-3 years old which is beyond me as he was brought into a house with 2 other dogs originally. We worked with many different behaviorist and nothing worked. We ended up dealing his his issues however we could not take him for his walk during “rush hour”, going on vacation was so stressful as no one truly understands exactly how to manage him other than us. He has had about 7 level 1 bites in 8 years and then just recently bit my girlfriends foot because it was too close to his face and jumped up at my new neighbor as she was going to pet him within 2 weeks. We did warn her he is weary with people he doesn’t know however it is not her fault or necessarily his. He had a huge heart and loved us so much, there was just a terrible reaction he had in situations. We did out absolute best for 9.5 years and very unfortunately came to the point where we had to protect ourselves legally and more importantly protect our family and neighbors and their dogs. I miss him everyday, the house is too quiet without him. Thank you for letting me share my story and thank you for everyone sharing theirs, it helps to know you are not alone.
Lou says
Wow! Thank you all, this has been helpful and comforting.
I adopted Lil One, a lab mix, last year. Her story was slanted by the previous owners and I could read between the lines that she had been abused. They should have been truthful as I’m not sure I would have interfered with their decision to euthanize her.
I had two older dogs when I accepted the
3 yo female. She immediately went after the 9 yo male that outweighed her by 40 lbs. She ‘allowed’ the 11 yo female lab to continue her life with Daddy, though when they were alone Lil One expressed dominance at much as she could.
After various confrontations with other dogs welcomed in my house with their owners as well as some aggressions with people, I had accepted the management of Lil One. (I had some experience with an ‘aggressive’ breed previously and we made it work.)
I brought Lil One to the vet for her annual visit. It was a scary visit! No one could get a muzzle on her to clip her paws. The vet noted her aggressiveness last year and thought it best for the vet and handlers do the exam away from me. They came back with her to ask my help, because they couldn’t examine at all.
We put her on the table and the vet could listen to her heart and do the touching and manipulating with my help (even with her growls under breath). I was holding her and petting her head. Then came the shots and blood sample! After both shots, Lil One twisted, growled, barked and almost bit all three of us! The vet decided to waive the blood sample, because she had one the year before.
I asked the vet about ‘puppy prozac’ and she didn’t have any recommendations. She did say, she could provide something for her next visit if I called ahead.
I’ve had some really friendly moments with ‘Lil One’, but even her play involves some form of teeth, like mouthing my arm with her teeth and tongue. Shortly after her vet visit, I gave her kisses on her head and then made kissing sounds at which point, she bit my lip. Later that evening, I sat with her and tried to mend the situation. She bit me again leaving a mouse under my eye.
I began considering euthanasia. I did research, talked with vets, other dog owners and decided I couldn’t do it.
Not even a week later, I sat with her because she was looking cute. I went to pet her and she bit me again in the lip that was almost healed. This time it tore my lip open wider and more jagged.
I never raised my voice or hand after either time. I’m afraid I have no choice and it breaks my heart!
Erin Gerstmeyer says
I have revisited this site multiple times over the past 4 months. I have been back and forth over whether putting our 4 1/2 year old English bulldog/catahoula X down was right. I miss him terribly. Once a dog has bitten someone in your own home (our 3 year old) especially a child, things really need to be taken seriously. Up to that point he had about 6-10 bites/nips. All level 2, one a level 3. But they were all on people coming into our house or yard, until my daughter. He did bite my husband once as well, really deep bite through his lip, but my husband had decided to alpha roll him. Which I didn’t agree with, so I didn’t blame the dog .. Dominance theory isn’t something that works with a fear aggressive dog, as my husband found out the hard way. We couldn’t trust him anymore and he was put to sleep. I have found much solace in the comments of others and Patricia’s original post. I will continue to come back to this site as I try to move on.
Penni says
i am about to make this decision for my two year old chihuahua. from the time he was a baby, he would go into rages and attack me for no reason. i have tried everything i know, but it doesn’t help. the vet claimed it was me because i am not strong enough to be alpha. i am not so sure that is right.
he will let the vet’s office do almost anything to him. but he has bitten my mom and my aunt, gone into rages against my niece, and today bit me again.
i have a lot of scars because of him. yes, if i could find someone who could handle him, i would gladly rehome him. i called around and there was only one person in our entire area who thought she could train him, but she wants $500. being on social security, that is simply not feasible and i have to ask myself if i could trust him even if he got trained.
it is breaking my heart because he is so lovable at times. he cries if i leave him locked in the house to step outside. he greets me when i come back in as though i have been gone forever. i will miss him standing on his hind legs and tapping my arm with his paw in search of petting.
i adore this little dog and this is beyond a doubt the hardest decision i have ever had to make
Zak says
These comments are very therapeutic and so to help me with my recovery I figured I would share my story, and hopefully it’ll help someone else find solace. I too like the term “soul scorching” because I just had my fiancé take my youngest dog to be PTS this evening.
My blue pitbull would’ve turned 3 on December 2, 2016. I got him from a breeder and even had papers/registered, so no backyard/puppy mill. Since I’ve had 2 pitbulls before I thought this would’ve been no problem. Early on he was more anxious than my 7yr old female pit but nothing seemed to manifest until he was +2yrs old.
The fist incident happened when I was at my parents house and my cousin’s toddler walked over and tripped and fell onto him. He jumped up and nipped him in the face, leaving only a red mark. Being that I wasn’t there in the room my uncle said it was nothing and that he just scared the dog.
When my fiancé moved into the house she also brought a pit into the situation and everything was fine. The two neutered males would run up and down the fence that faces the alley anytime the garbage truck or the motorcycle would go by. It wasn’t long before we had to get our 1st of MANY stitches for the other male from misplaced aggression. The other male has probably been bit, leaving huge gashes, at least 10 times in 15 months.
When my fiancé had our first baby and as soon as my child started to crawl my two males didn’t want anything to do with the baby. It wasn’t until last week that the youngest pit growled and nipped at our baby. My fiancé freaked out, rightfully so, and I instantly felt irresponsible/guilty of neglecting my dogs. The next morning I decided to take my baby and youngest pit for a walk and work with him. The dog had no problem walking next to the stroller or anything, but we ran into a neighbor and he started to growl and show signs of anxiety. Later on in the walk there was a lady and her ~2-3yr old daughter. The girl wanted to come pet my dog, so the mom let her cross the street and she proceeded to come close. When she was approximately 3ft he started to back away and growled. So I ended the interaction there.
I had 2 of the best trainers in the DFW area come over within a week and both of them were amazed at how obedient my pits were. I have 9 chickens that free range in my backyard and the dogs don’t even touch them even if they’re out there all day with them. The chickens will even case the pit that has the aggression problem away from his food while he’s eating. WTF?!?!
This dog EVERYONE loved and he was such a great dog, that’s why I’m still bawling my eyes out. To make it worse I didn’t even have the courage to go with her to have him PTS. I don’t think I would’ve been able to leave the vets office if I did. My animals are my family and this is easily the hardest and most heavily weighted decision I’ve ever had to make.
I love you Awanyu! Please forgive me and I promise I’ll come find you.
ashley says
I am crying as I read this because we are facing this with our Labrador right now. We have had her since she was 8 weeks old. She is now almost 2 years old. 90% of the time she is a great dog, but we live on edge with her. At first if you tried to take something from her she would growl, show her teeth and maybe “nip”. Then about 6 months ago she was lying on my bed and I went to pet her head and she attacked- bit me on the arm. I took her to the vet and did blood work, called a trainer, etc. She has had one or two more episodes but just with the snarling, until today. I was petting her and talking to her- tail wagging away- then like a switch was flipped she attacked. My whole arm was in her mouth, she pulled me off the chair and I had to hit her with my other hand to break free. I ended up in urgent care.
I have cried all day about it because right this second you would have no idea that anything was wrong. I came upon this article because I was searching for any shred of hope. It it gut wrenching to even think about putting her down. Thank you for sharing this article and helping me to at least think things through and exhaust all my options.
Jerri M says
thank you for this thoughtful article. I am in this position now. so on the fence, can I risk her biting one of my grown children or other dogs? she’s seems happy, tail wagging then just snaps on the little dog for no apparent reason to us. Is she jealous? is she doing this for attention? Am I not spending enough time with her? or is she in physical pain from an injury when she was younger? or are her hormones freaking her out again? She went thru 3 false pregnancies before we were able to get her fixed, which may have given her possessive / aggressive tendencies. Argh!! I love her, but I feel that I’ve failed her. It would be so much easier if she were physically sick then mentally.
Sam says
Its just been over 6 weeks since i had to have my jack russel pepper put to sleep my story is above. Im still reading others cause even thou its been 6 weeks it still hurts and even o she was quiet aggressive she cld b so loveing too so i do miss the loveing part of her i dont miss beinf on pins everyday and havein to have my daughter with me at all times in case the dog just turned cause like many of you have said with the kissing noise smouthing them and they got wagglt tails and theyd just attack its crazy ive been watching paul o grady for the love of dogs and some them have had awfull lifes and aint aggressive my dog was loved treated gd always on walks so it just goes to prove a dog thats well looked after and loved dont stop them from being aggressive my heart goes out to every one thats have to go through this its heart breaking but i will say its the right choice for u and the dog . Its been killing me my 4 year old daughter went to school with her dog here and came home and she was gone she thinks she is on a farm with chickens and other dogs kills me when she asks about her even had google for a pic ov a jack on a farm lucky for us it looked like her theres a man in the pic so she thinks shes with the farmer man
Carol Grein says
I am crying while reading theses letters. I too today in fact my dog she’s 5 years old. We got her as apuppy from a rescue shelter. Went for my son I believe it was over him taking something from her that’s not the point. It hasn’t been only my son it’s been all my kids all three and my husband. We went to behavioral training she was sent away for training. She’s caged when the kids friends come over. I don’t trust her anymore she just attacks it’s scary to hear that sound. My children have been bit to many times. Face hands thighs backs my one daughter needed practice surgery on her lip. I am so upset to even think about putting her down what kind of person am I. I can’t take another chance my kids anyone could be the next serious attack. She’s my dog she follows me everywhere so it’s making even harder to even think this. I don’t want to see or hear im in denial. Seeing my son he’s 13 cry and tell me to get rid of her she’s evil. It makes me feel so horrible that I won’t listen because of how I will feel putting her down. My kids come first. How I wish my family would understand how my heart is breaking i love her so much. They don’t feel the same. They want her gone. What do I do who do I turn too. Money is also an issue with training again. thank you for listening sorry to choppy im very upset I’m physically hurting right now. Will she ever forgive me
Sam says
Aww carol its so hard and i understand how ur feeling its even harder when the dog is attached to you but like u i couldnt trust my dog any more i was constantly on pins ive always told my daughter not to feed her any of our food and she went to feed her a crisp one day and as i said noo the dog bit her cause she was taken it away from her i didnt think i cld blame the dog cause shes always known not to feed the dog n in sept i took her for a walk we was out for about a hour down the canal she had food wen came home sat down she fell asleep by me nd for no reason she attacked my hand and wouldnt leave it go that was the final straw for me cause it could been my 4 year olds face our dog was only 18 months old too you couldnt stick your foot out liek to stop her running out the gate shed attack you i know no one understands how u feel when its your dog cause there not just dogs there part the family and its bn 6 weeks since i had pepper put to sleep and i dont regret it cause deep down i think it was the right thing to do not only for our safety but hers too you could always speak to your vet but my vet advised that training is only 50% chance of it working and i didnt have the money to waste if it didnt work cause alot it hasnt worked for them so i just had to lend the money to have her put to sleep it was 106 pound with my vet im always checking back here if you need talk
Rachael says
I am also crying while reading these comments. We have made the decision to have Archie put to sleep in 2 days time. Archie is a basset hound, 2 1/2 years old. We had him from a pup, did everything properly, met the parents, and the other pups, Archie chose us more than we chose him! We enrolled in puppy classes, all good. We adored him and he was our baby as me and my husband don’t have kids. He went everywhere with us. Then when Archie got to around 6 months old the first signs of aggression started to rear its head. Archie had got hold of a pair of my reading glasses, and I tried to take them off of him. He turned into a Tasmanian devil within an instant, leaving a badly gashed and bleeding hand. We guessed it was our fault for trying to take something from him and he wasn’t expecting it. But as the months went on the biting was becoming more regular. Instances such as Archie turning on us for no apparent reason, and when he got hold of your arm, leg etc, he would not let go you would have to prize his jaws off of you. We got a dog behaviourist in and she spent a few hours with us, in which Archie had tried to bite my husband as he moved to get us out of his seat. Her report said he was a danger and that his prognosis wasn’t good. We couldn’t bear this so we looked into alternatives, Adaptil diffusers and collars, calming tablets, diet etc. We paid for a full body scan and bloods to see if there was anything medical going on. Everything came back fine. For a few months things seemed to be looking up, Archie seemed more settled with no biting incidents. Then one day he snapped again for no apparent reason and I was left with a badly bruised and punctured arm and thumb.
We told ourselves we could cope, but we couldn’t have visitors round to our house anymore, we couldn’t risk it. So the last year we have not had parents, nieces and nephews, friends, round to visit just to be on the safe side. We have spent all of our time and resource with Archie, in the hope he might grow out of it.
The final straw was last week. Archie asked to go out for a widdle, I let him out and he suddenly turned on me and bit my hand and wouldn’t let go. I managed to prize his mouth off my hand with my free hand, and then ran away from him, by this time my husband had run into the room, Archie then turned on him, ripping the arm off his hoody. It was a viscous stand off for a good 5 minutes all the while Archie was lunging for us both. My husband grabbed a big towel and chucked it over him and managed to bundle him into his room and close the door, even then he was going ballistic trying to get out.
I spoke with our vet the next day, she is convinced it’s genetics, and that some dogs just can’t be helped. And the thing I ask myself, is if Archie is happy. The more time goes on, I don’t feel he is. He has extreme anxiety issues, the smallest thing can set him off into a quivering wreck. No medication is working. It’s got to the stage where he cannot even have his vaccination, be bathed, or be touched, he is slowly closing himself off. If you go to smooth him, he will growl under his breath.
Me and my husband are like zombies right now, we both love him so, so much. He is my husbands first ever dog, whereas I have had dogs all my life. I feel so sad for Archie on very brief occasions he is the most loving dog, but there will always be the unpredictability that he could turn at any given moment.
My heart is broken already, and I don’t think I will ever get over it, if someone could give me a solution I would take it, but it’s just not safe for him or us to be living like this. All I am clinging onto is he has had a fantastic few years, lots of lovely walks and trips to our caravan, and I am glad he has experienced what it is to be loved.
Anyone going through this or who has had to make this decision my heart goes out to you, it is just horrendously gut wrenching and soul destroying to have to make a decision like this.
Kathy says
Thank you for your article. My Boarder came to me with issues. He used to stalk me and we got over that with behaviour modification. However, in the past 10 months he has bitten me twice. Once needing hospital and dressing changes. This week he has attacked me when I put his collar on. But this was different he just kept coming. He eventually stopped. I was clam throughout, but thinking this time he is going to savage me. I have agonised over putting him to sleep. The BC rescue have already stated they won’t rehome him. We have seen behaviourist. Brushing, medicating is really hard, any personal care is off bounds. He has a switch on and off like Jeckle and Hyde. I’m seeing a different vet tonight as I want to consider epilepsy as no two snarls are the same. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone. I couldn’t live with myself if he attacked a friend.
Crystal says
My doberman has bit the same person twice. The doberman before him also bit this same person. This person has never hurt either dog. I don’t understand this. Can someone please help me. Thank you.
Sam says
How are you all doing ? Writting this message in the hope some one is going to read it its been just over 2 months since i had my pepper put to sleep my story is above .i still do miss her so much i still cant get over it came to this im heartbroken 🙁
Georgia Carl says
As an owner who is now facing this situation, it is absolutely heart wrenching. Our beagle/dachshund mix whom we have since he was 6 weeks (now 3 1/2) is an aggressive dog. He has bit a friend 6 times, my grown son, my daughter, my husband myself and my grandson. Fortunately, none of these have been serious, but the question is always what will the next action bring. However, his aggression is growing. And many times it is not clear what triggers it. He has also attacked our other dog. We have consulted with different trainers and our vet. Our vet gave us the name of a person who she thought could help, but this person has never returned any of our calls. We have talked to local shelters, at least 3 people who work with dogs and some family members who raise dogs. The advice we have gotten is he can’t be put into another home and basically the “best” solution is to euthanize him. Which is breaking my heart. To add to that, the place who has helped when our elderly dogs have reached the end, refuse to do this with a healthy dog. One trainer said the only other option was an E Collar…Our hearts are torn. Because we know what we have to do, but my heart is breaking.
Sam says
How can they refuse to help ? Its basically ur last option i know it isnt easy to av to do my vet advised it was for the best wen my dog attacked me he said it was only 50/50 chance ov a trainer bein able to help her but it wasnt fair on me and wasnt fair on the dog to suffer bein that way it really is an awfull thing to av to do but its for the best not just for u but for the dog and every one around the dog hope u manage to be able to do what is right for u all
Christy says
I just found this article and it hits home. One of my closest friends runs our local animal shelter and I just texted her. I have decided to not put it off anymore and take my 8 month old heeler, aussie, pit, GSD mix in to be PTS tomorrow.
I worked in animal care for 10 years and have never found a dog this young that was this territorial or aggressive. He spent his first six weeks on my daughter’s boyfriend’s farm surrounded by love and came straight to us… surrounded by love and discipline. Never abused or hit. He has broke a window, ate four leashes and two collars and WILL NOT house train at all. He tried to kill our cat and will attack our 11 year old daily. He will also attack us if he feels the need. No one can walk in our house without fear of being bit. Yesterday, he jumped up on the couch with a bone and laid on my son. When my son tried to move he snapped. It took us 20 minutes to free my son from his wrath.
The vet asked me to never bring him back because he almost took a chunk out of his hand.
A trainer is out of the question as we are a one income family and the only one in our area is $650 for one week. I spoke to another several times and she said PTS is the best option in this case. I cannot rehome him because he hates everyone that isn’t me or my husband. He tolerates the older two most of the time (ages 19 and 17) but knows he is as big as my youngest and can take him down.
Did I mention he ate the shock collar too?
Tomorrow is going to be a hard day for him and I know I am going to hate myself but he is a major attack waiting to happen and at almost 80lbs of pure aggression.. it won’t be good.
Rhonda says
I have a foster that is aggressive to everyone but me and my immediate family! I have been told he is very protective of us. He has nipped a few people. I can’t keep him anymore cause I have wrought iron fences and have kids on both sides of me and the neighborhood park behind me and he worries me. I have 2 personal dogs and have a doggie door so all 3 dogs go in and out as they want! I have contacted several rescues but none have acknowledged me. I have asked other fosters to take him but nobody will. I know if I take him back to the shelter they will kill him. So, I was thinking about taking him to my vet friend and put him to sleep in a nice loving way with me there loving on him instead of hateful like at the shelter! He is a little pit and I’m pretty sure he was abused as a pup. He was brought to the shelter November 2015 and I got him April 2016. He has been “adopted” out 3 times but returned TO ME because of aggression (I would not let them send him back to the shelter). I do not have the money for training and it doesn’t look like the shelter cares enough for training either!
VickyVP says
Thank you for this post! I have struggled for the last two years with this decision with my beautiful Great Pyrenees/Chow mix, Crosby who became aggressive after some medicine that was supposed to help him get through his fear of thunderstorms…it didn’t, it caused the fear to turn to aggressiveness. I spent over $2,000 getting every test imaginable done with his vet (to make sure there was no physical problem), taking him to two different behavioral therapists and working extensively with him to overcome his fear and learn to trust me again. Although I was able to gain back 75% of his trust, our relationship had changed and I could no longer hug him, rub his belly, or touch him when he was in a laying down position or he would try to bite me. I also could no longer groom him and just had to have him completely shaved once a year (while under anesthesia) because he couldn’t be groomed at all. All of this I could have still lived with, but it was my daughter and my grandson (who lived with me) that I feared for. My grandson has autism and so couldn’t be completely taught how to be around Crosby. Crosby was unpredictable with me and mostly aggressive towards all other people….no one could pet him. He was so full of life and I had to put him down (two years after the aggression started) which has tortured my mind and heart because I feel like I failed him. I believe his mind was tormented….he wanted so badly to be good, but something in his brain was too fearful and he would react with aggressiveness. I am currently in mourning of my big fluffy (once goofy and so kind), now aggressive dog. I finally made the decision to put him down a week ago and it has probably been the hardest thing I’ve had to do! I love you, Crosby!
Barbara says
I am grateful for the insightful wisdom of Patricia McConnell creating this format…so others much like myself can find some solace in order to deal with the grief when one has to make “the decision”.
I rescued a bichon/poodle three years ago…..and yesterday I had to euthanize him, which was so heartbreaking, especially when a pet is “street” happy and playful, showing no signs of being impaired…..yet, in house….it may be a very different situation.
My beloved Toto had been a “battered” dog….. and placed in many foster homes after his elderly owner past away…. he showed up on one of the most popular rescue sites as “a happy, well adjusted pet”. His history was never disclosed to me but after the first week of scary behavior, I tracked down the daughter who had put him up for adoption …. she was quite open about her mother’s abuse….I will not go into details but it was nothing less than daily torture that my poor little Toto had endured for 7 years.
So now I’m even more determined to show him that he will always be “safe” and “loved” for the rest of his life……Fortunately, I have a wonderful vet and his evaluation was that his brain had been compromised by so many beatings and prescribed Phenobarbital to help with the aggressive seizures. Over the last three years this worked relatively well but then there was the “demand” for rabies vaccination(s) (which I NEVER did). However, I had to administer flea meds….and after trying five different kinds….I finally found one that would not scramble his brain …..until a few weeks ago.
We lived between CT & SC……we had been north for about 3 months, when in CT I did not medicate him but knowing we were traveling to SC this past week I placed a dose on him…..This time his aggression was out of control…..One evening, he attempted to tear me apart for 15 min, I manage to escape with out injury…..but there had been other situations over the past 3 years and lately even before the flea med he was showing aggression towards my friends.
When we were together one on one, he was a devoted loving pet….However, I could never fully trust him. I had to be on guard and was willing do so as I loved him that much BUT then I had to consider the safety of my friends….especially at night as that is when most of the episodes occurred.
Yesterday, December 15, 2016 I took him to my vet for the last time. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do…..especially when you are walking in a seemingly happy, bouncing pet but then there is the “dark side”, which most never see. My heart is tortured and I pray to God that I did not fail him….He did give “me” so much love and if it wasn’t for his flawed brain (at times) I couldn’t have imagined a better companion.
For all of those who are about to make “the decision” or have already done so…..please know that my heart goes out to you…..Everything in life is temporary, if we could only make the good parts last forever…..God Bless You and Your Beloved Pet!
Mr. Bojangles says
I’m very grateful for this posting and would like to thank you for opening up a subject matter that is still bothersome, even to me today. Our dog of five years, Bojangles was a Rat Terrier/Chihuahua mix that we raised from a young pup and was quite adorable. After his first set of shots, his behavior was questionable, but he was a puppy so my husband and I dismissed his semi-aggressive behavior and continue to shower him with love and affection.
Yet, year after year, his behavior became more erratic, complexed, aggressive and combative. His behavior was so disruptive that I had to stop taking him on walks and to the local groomers for his shampoo and nail trim. He would growl and attempt to bite the bypasser and groomers and as if they were trying to harm him. His last trip to the groomers was so bad that we had to put a muzzle and some type of cone around his neck to prevent him from biting the groomers. It took (3) groomers, including myself, to hold him down to get his nails trimmed. I was so embarrassed from his aggressive biting behavior to the point that I just wanted to cry. After his last nail trim from the groomer, I was told by the groomers dr. that the next time his nails required trimming, he would have to be put to sleep. The cost to put a dog to sleep for a nail trim cost considerable 5x’s more than the cost of getting his nails trimmed.
So the behavioral problems and financial cost began to accumulate from there. He had an ear infection and the dr. wanted to put him asleep to treat a small ear infection. He had annual vet appts. and was suggested for him to be put to sleep for regular checkups. When it was time for his annual shots, the Dr. and his staff looked at me, as if I had abused my dog. I was totally mortified. That was a nightmare in itself. So I began taking Bo to a local non-profit animal clinic that offered discount shots for dogs. The onlookers with their disciple dogs, looked at me as if I was a bad dog parent. I was at my wits end when it took the dr., dr. assistant and myself to hold Bo down to get his annual preventive shots.
He would attacked neighbors, mail carriers, family, friends and kids for no reason at all. We could not have company in the house without having to securely lock him in another room. At times, he would nip, bite and growl at my husband and I if he felt threaten.
Unprovoked, Bo would charge children, adults and animals for no apparent reason. It did not matter how large the other dogs were, Bo was fearless and ready for action.
Even after (2) years of relinquishing our dog “Bo” to a local shelter for adoption, it was a difficult decision, because in my heart, I knew he would not be a good candidate for adoption. I called the adoption shelter the next day and was told me he was not fit for adoption and was therefore euthanized.
Diane says
I’ve been reading the comments above because I too have been in the position of having my sweet dog pts. I adopted him, a border mix, from the shelter ten years ago. He was meek, incredibly fearful and messed all over himself when I asked to see him. It took two of us to get him out of the kennel. I visited him three times and the third time he picked his head up and willingly followed me to the bonding room where I could make my decision. He was fairly relaxed and even rolled on his back for a belly rub. The shelter thought he was around 6 months old. I took him to a groomer first thing and was told he refused to stand, would just lay down. He would not jump into the car, I had to pick him up and put him in for the first month. He didn’t fetch or chase anything. He didn’t chew things up, he was housebroken and didn’t bark unless there was something to bark about like a stranger at the door. I figured time in a safe environment and lots of love and social things would help him open up, which he did to a point. He mapped to me and loved me as I loved him.
He settled into my house, was trained by the cats and loved to go for walks. He was never one to follow me everywhere and it was difficult to socialize him. We took obedience class together and he was brilliant, but never really warmed up to other dogs or people. After four years I lost my house in the financial melt down and a friend offered to take him which I was grateful for. He stayed with his parents and their dogs for four years until they weren’t able to keep any of their animals anymore due to their illnesses and old age. By that time I was in a place where I could have him back and I was thrilled.
But he had changed. He was fearful. He didn’t like to be touched. He stayed in his bed and didn’t wander around at all. He wouldn’t go into the back yard even with me. The vet described him as “flat”, and he was unpredictable. He was still brilliant and loved to go to the park but after about 10 minutes then he was ready to come home. If another dog or person came around, he sat on my feet and wouldn’t budge. When we got home he’d go to his bed and didn’t leave it. He no longer ate his food when anyone was around, he would wait until after I went to bed. The first time I took him to the groomers I explained he was very ‘shy’. It took them four hours with a very patient groomer. Same thing the second time but he snapped at them. The third time I called they said they couldn’t take him.
He had also snapped at me. I was trying to brush him outside and he swung around and bit at me; fortunately I had heavy long sleeves and it just left a bruise but it made me wary. When we went to the park I kept my distance from others as much as possible but people would still come up and chat and kids would be around and I could feel him tense up against me so would take him home asap. He was very, very good on the leash, always had been, but one day when we were outside and I was changing directions he whirled around again and bit me on the arm. He bit hard but thankfully I had a winter jacket on and it just left a bruise. I called my friend and asked if his folks had any issues with nipping or biting and there had been a couple of episodes that they ignored and that they did not share with me. Had I known this I would not have taken him back because I am not willing to risk anyone being bitten – especially a child.
I had no problem with him here at home aside from the fact that he was just a “flat” dog but there was something about him that just wasn’t right. He would endure vet visits and as soon as we got home ran to his bed. I took him in because of a lump which they wanted to aspirate, but he wouldn’t go with the vet tech – I had to lead him to the back. When they were done the vet told me be was okay but very fearful away from me. By the way, he did not have separation anxiety as he was home all day when I went to work. There was something else wrong that the vets couldn’t figure out and neither could I. Physically he was fine. The final straw was when I was trying to move him around so I could clean some stuff off his butt area after being at the park. I had done this before with no problem but this time he bit my hand and drew blood and zinged a nerve.
All I could think of was what if it had been a little kid walking by, reaching out and “petting the doggie”. They do it before you can blink.
If he had ever bitten a child that would have been it – no questions asked, and I am grateful it never happened.
So now I’m sitting here with my heart ripped out because last week I had to do something I never expected I would ever do. I am wracked with guilt about what else I could have done. What if, what if, what if. Would drugs have helped a situation that was totally unpredictable? What effect might they have – could they made something else worse? If he bit someone else, I would not have forgiven myself let alone been able to pay medical bills or any lawsuits.
He had ten years that he probably never would have had, but I still feel like a failure and I hope he forgives me from the Bridge because I cannot forgive myself.
Isabel Quasha says
Yesterday my Girly went to heaven in the hands of two angels who picked her up from my car… earlier we were already there but I changed my mind, I read a blog that said don’t put your dog to sleep in a shelter- Girly and I walked around we saw the other dogs and Girly wanted to help them. When we passed by the entrance she was pulling wanting to go in. I said no I’m not taking you there…later I left her inside the car and the attendant scanned her microchip and left her in the car until she is done with the papers and she’d get the a technician and they would go get Girly. I asked why didn’t she take her she said because I did not want her to get excited if she sees other dogs. I asked her will she be waiting, she said it will be quick, I asked what will she be seing- she’ll just know she is in a different place and feel like shes getting a vaccine… she asked about the ashes they charged $250- I couldn’t afford more than the $50 euthanacia fee. They went to pick her up, I greeted her and said “I’ll see you again Girly”, she let me kiss her..she was excited to see the two coming- she went freely and was wagging her tail, jumpy going into the building, Girly did not look back… 2 hours earlier we were just there she ws begging to go in, now she’s happy she’s going in… The ashes will be scattered with all the other doggie’s that went to heaven with her. When I was arranging the service it’s as if the attendant was taking the longest time, she asked me if there was any body else that has an interest with her I said no, and remembered her dad tried to take her… It was the second time I’d been to them this month, I kept delaying the day- my regular vet refused to book me again because I did not show 4 x… Girly is my emotional support pet, she attacked my neighbor and her dog, I had to remove her from my apartment or be evicted… both of us were living in the car half the time- They told me before not to just leave her in the shelter because if they don’t know if she has problems they will check her out, since I did not have the heart to leave her in a receiving cage like she was a tray of food… if I had done that they would not had me to tell them all about Girly, they told me she was not adoptable that they would put her down but I can still train her or call a rescue group or move. I didn’t get to the training, I had training they gave me a shock collar… after we first left the place I brought Girly to Seal Park- she was happy her poop was soft and brown and green maybe she was nervous. We walked to the middle I saw there was a small dog so I called Girly and said lets go… we went to Foster City Park we got in the big dog gate then I saw a dad and his kids, they had a big dog and a small dog which he carried in his arms I said Sir if you are coming in let me leave first because I dont trust my dog, I said do you understand he said yes you said your dog attacks… I said well, I don’t trust my dog wont jump on you and your dog you are carrying she doesn’t like that because they are all supposed to be off leash… I was leaving the park, we were in the cage and was surrounded all of a sudden by like 6 dogs with 3 owners- Girly started barking at them barking at her pulling to the left right and center she twisted me and I fell I broke my fall with my right elbow, but my left chest left knee and left ankle all got hurt. Thank God I did not let go of her leashes- if that happened Girly would have gotten as many as she could and knocked down the parents with the dogs. They shouted “are you okay” I said yes and picked myself up brought Girly into the car… I said this is it, I’m not waiting any longer, I can’t control Girly, I brought her to the Peninsula Humane Society again and they took me in right away and said they would do it right away… computer clicks away she asks and verified I asked her why she did not take Girly with her after she scanned her, she said you told me she gets excited when she sees other dogs, so lets leave her in the car… she goes on the computer again and picks the technician and proceeds to get Girly, Minutes before that a man came and she said leave him in the car I’ll be back in 15 minutes… when we went to get Girly I saw the family and their
big golden brown long haired dog, was sleeping on the trunk of their SUV, I realized that they were next… I appreciated that they did not upset Girly, that we did not have to see the old and sick dogs… I saw earlier that day, the family walked in with their dog on a leash looking like a grandfather with gray hair- that’s why earlier I did not want Girly to see that… Thank God it happened the way it did. I feel horrible about Girly, but I haven’t been able to control her now she does not have to have me pull her back she can do everything she want’s. She went a skip hopping with them in through their wide doors… 5 years before that Girly and I were homeless living in my car, Girly got put in the shelter when I had to go to the hospital, when I picked her up I saw a pile of old comforters and towels, a dog bed… perhaps the people who left their dogs in the receiving cages with no questions asked… I got some blankets for us of Girl… she kept me warm on the hardest day of my life. Peninsula Humane Society also did her spaying for free because she was a pit bull, they micro chipped her for a bit of money and I got her free vaccinations every 1-3 years of her 7 year life PHS registered her… when it came time for me to surrender the first time this month they scanned her and gave me her number so if I find someone to transfer her to we just need to call a number give that number and they will talk to the new owner… that first time I went I was screaming crying on the top of my lungs saying my daughter wants my dog dead my same attendant told me about them being the last resort and she said call these rescues and I did but they did not reply they said there are so many… I was too exhausted moving Girl fro place to place parking walking many times a day… I paid for training I couldn’t finish and I lost her collar… she was not adoptable because of her history of biting…
I read about a woman who loved her dog but couldn’t control her- one day she got knocked down and hit her head and she ended up paralyzed and had to put the dog down… she regrets she did not do it sooner of course.
I’m going crazy over Girly, I tried to keep her since August and was going to wait a little longer maybe the Department of Fair Housing will help give me to today to decide for myself …now was the time, I got to look Girly in the eyes after she was pulling and twisting she knocked me down she was looking at me like “what ya lookin’ at” I had used up all my savings housing her all I could afford was PHS but what I got from them has been priceless… they took care of Girly from when she was 6 weeks old… I am very grateful to the Peninsula Humane society, I don’t know the names of the attendants- they sent someone to receive the items I was donating this time… 5 years ago we were taking from the donation pile… Girly and I got lucky and found a home- it found us… Girly couldn’t be with me there because there are small children and 100 year old people with little dogs just like the ones Girl likes to get to their voice boxes (like the talking toys she would tear up so they shut up- not a good idea) and Girly has caused me to slip and fall 5 times… if ever she would wonder what was happening maybe its a good thing part of the recent memory would be her fighting the mean little dogs attacking her..Never mind Girly “we will meet again don’t know when don’t know where but we will meet again one sunny day keep smilling through just like you always do till the blue skies turn the dark clouds far away” JCash —-IQuasha
Amy says
Thank you for the article. We rescued a chocolate lab almost a year ago. He’s the most obident dog we’ve ever had. So sweet and loveable. We’ve had several friends around and kids – always playing – never any issues. However, we live in a neighborhood with a sidewalk along our yard and he has issues with ONLY people jogging. He’s now gotten out of his barriers (electric collar) (didn’t have on bc kids took off) and has bitten two adult runners now.
This morning we are taking him to our local animal control. They will conduct behavioral testing on him and hopefully find an adoptive family to fit his needs.
This is the hardest thing – since he’s healthy and spoiled. Our families heart is left shattered but know we can’t keep him in our environment without a yard.
on top of everything we now have to deal with the burden of the guy he bit. The guy is not compassionate towards animals one bit. I see legal issues in our near future. Ugh people.
Prayers to all!
Margaret says
Had to have a lovely dobe pts . Adopted him two years ago and soon realised the previous owner had omitted to tell me an awful lot. He was literally afraid of his own shadow. His quality of life was poor and so was ours. He never bit but he looked very scary as he barked at the people he was so terrified of, trying to keep them at bay. He would do the toilet in the house when he was too afraid to go out because the wind was howling through the trees or children were shouting. I have been looking some at the wonderful research being done in Massachusetts at Tufts and other institutions using dobermanns. They were chosen as a breed which has been ‘ enriched for psychiatric diseases’ by inbreeding. What a statement. Breeders have a lot to answer for . I tried to help him become more relaxed, but his genes were stacked against him. In hindsight, I may just have added to his stress by asking him to be what he couldn’t.He was a well- trained boy, but when one his countless stressors came on the scene he went into a blind panic. Thankfully I was able to take him to a vet who didn’t question,doubt or judge my decision. Please think twice about re-homing such dogs. I suspect the previous owner knew he couldn’t be helped and now I’m left distraught .
Savaanha Sequeira says
My dog has bitten us before , nothing that required stitches but you know the kind where it leaves their teeth wounds ( quite painful) , last night he bit me there’s a puncture below my thumb that’s so deep n the other side of my hand bears the imprint of several teeth, it’s still painful today . He was sleeping in his favourite spot under the couch n I pulled him out to let him out for a bit, he’s 14 so he’s a little deaf n I guess he acted out of fear but he always growls at us he always did ( it’s just been getting worse over the years – he doesn’t bite so often but he growls all the time, I’m not even sure what I’m doing writing this , I feel guilty even being on this site , it’s not like we ever needed stitches n I know he does pose a serious threat to us but he’s my baby , my little baby boy who i love more than anyone else in this world, he’s a part of me , he’s a Pom cross so he’s 10 kilos , how dangerous could he be? Should we keep him outside n ban him from the house ? Should we leash him a lot ?
Jesse says
I’m curious to know how often a certified trainer will tell a client to euthanize a dog not only because of the dogs behavior, but because the owner (in this case, a rescue owner) is clearly not capable of properly managing a dog with behavior issues. For example, a woman started a rescue in my town a couple of years ago and after only a year in ‘business’ she euthanized a large dog. She wrote a lengthy post on Facebook to justify the taking of this healthy dogs life and for the most part put all the blame on the dog (whose behavior issues were nowhere near as serious as she made them out to be). Yes, the dog had bitten a few people in the past (puncture wounds, no stitches) but it was due to mismanagement on the owners part. The dog was fearful and reactive and had been carelessly introduced to people who had no idea how to properly approach or interact with such a dog. The reason this bothers me so much is because this rescue owner accepted no responsibility whatsoever for her own inexperience. She took on a dog she knew she couldn’t handle just to see if she could, and when it didn’t work out as planned, the dog paid the price. She had taken the dog for an assessment with a CPDT-KA trainer who suggested euthanizing the dog. I know this trainer, and I know her suggestion was based on the owners lack of knowledge and inability to properly work with/manage a dog like this. I’m sure when a trainer meets a client and their dog they are not only assessing the dog but also the owner? How often does a trainer say to themselves “this dog is safer being let go than in this individuals care”? Is euthanasia sometimes suggested as a means of ‘saving’ the dog?
Robby says
I have had a Terrier Chihuahua mix for about 5 years now. He was a rescue and abused by the males in his foster family. He can be a very loving dog but has turned aggressive towards my two teenage sons. For no reason he will attack my 17 year old. He usually does this when he gets ready to leave the house. He will not allow others in our house so I don’t know what to do to get help.
Clare says
I have almost 8 year old great dane male. He barks at strangers in our back yard and bitten two people and his companion dog. One of them was an intruder while we weren’t home and the other was a lady being friendly trying to pat him (he was barking at her). He occasionally barks at my children while they are in the back yard but to date has not touched them. We have a fence running through our yard so the kids have a poo free play area. I’m not sure what to do, do I give him the benefit of the doubt or should he be put down.
Brian Lefebvre says
It sad to think about this and I have been for several months.no several years. She has always had an aggressive behavior since she was a pup and now my little girl Abby is 10 years old. We have been thru a lot together including raising her own puppies ( she was not a good mom ). It started when she bit the first owner and I took her at the age of 10 months old, she never got along with other dogs and I already had one but. , we manage. She had bitten a few kids and some adults including me, some of the bites were serious and other just a scratch. It has put a very large strain on my relationship and I feel trap. I’ve tried training, and medications recommended by my Vet. I know what I need to do and it hurts my heart so much, I love my little Abby (Cocker Spaniel ). God give me strength
Brian Lefebvre says
P.S. I just left a comment and need to note that a little girl was hospitalized from her bite and I’ve had serious infections from Abby’s bites. Don’t get me wrong, I felt horrible about this and didn’t put her down. I can’t wait until something worse happens, she has gotten to close to people face ( eyes, month) . She is my baby girl and like I said in the other comment its killing me, it hurts to think this, what I have to do in order to protect my love ones. I feel your pain if your going thru this to.
Sam says
Aww brian i know its hard i ad to have my dog put to sleep cz she was aggressive towards me theres nothing worse than living in fear ov what may or may not happen next mine bit me for no reason i was only sitting on the sofa and she grabbed my hand and started shakein my hand had 5 holes in my hand that was it for me she was always quiet aggressive always took that everythin was hers she cld never b out when it was a hot day and a pool in sight my dad jumped in to our swimmin pool and my dog jumped on the side the pool tryin to get his face it was awful but its even worse avin to av hem put to sleep but ur doin whats best for u nd the dog u dont got to live in fear any more it bn 4 months since my dog gone and it was very hard but i know i did what was best for everyone
Bridget says
I’m going through this right now and I’m completely devastated. I have a german shepherd mix that I rescued at 5 months old. I’ve been able to manage his increasingly aggressive behavior until recent months when he began biting people in an attempt to “protect me”. I’m at a point where taking him outside is so anxiety provoking it takes me time to talk myself into doing it. He has never hurt me, but I’m scared to have visitors and I feel like this is perpetuating his territorial aggression over me. I’ve done what’s been recommended up to this point and the aggression continues (in fact it’s become worse, though less frequent) and it’s often unprovoked.
Thank you for writing this article. I’ve been having a hard time coming to terms with this, but I know for Huck and for myself this is probably our option, though it’s clearly a last resort. Life without him is going to be difficult.
Roseanne says
This is hard stuff. We are strongly debating whether to put our dog down because of multiple acts of misbehavior. He has bitten two people in the past two days, sending one to the hospital. I feel so bad for him and it’s mostly well all my fault for not training him better when he was still a pup. I feel worse because the only other option seems to be to keep him chained up which would defiantly lower his quality of life. I am at a complete loss!
John says
I have a 5 year old argentine mastiff and just reading this discussion brought me to tears. I am having to contemplate on putting him down due to his natural defense which is i want to be left alone all the time unless one of my 5 friends are near by. Recently i have brought him to the vet a few times he has always had wonderful experiences at the vet except for the last 2 times he has growled and snapped at the vets he is now marked as a muzzel dog there and we are all at loss with what to do. I recently was told about the book “the other end of the leash” i am hoping that this book can help us out we do not want to lose our pride and joy argentine mastiff
Adrian Crowther says
After 7 1/2 years with our German Shepherd we made the hard decision to have him put down. Unfortunately he came from a breeder who took him away from his mother too early and ended up being extremely nervous which turned into nervous aggression. Throughout the years we have had several behavioral specialist to help us out but he had bitten a few people and was unpredictable when walking past people.We had our first child 8 months ago and he quickly accepted her into the pack, on Sunday he bite the wife while she was on the floor playing with my daughter, the bite was bad enough that we had to go straight to hospital. We tried all we could to help him but I feel were left with no choice, we knew that we could not rehome him as he was too unpredictable and he wouldn’t settle living in a cage. That being said it still hurts knowing we had to put him down and I feel I failed him.
DP says
Patricia I am so happy to have found your blog/site. We just had to put down our 20 month old bullmastiff for serious aggression. He was a beauty (PERFECTION). But when I picked him up at 8 weeks old he was not interested in any of us and liked to sit in the corner. He would growl (like an adult dog) at my children if they looked at him while holding him. Not what you’d expect from an 8 week old pup and not our first bully. He started to warm to us after a couple of weeks but still growled and showed his teeth. at about 4 months he was playing with my son and then snapped, which is sort of puppy while teething stuff and tore his gums. then at one day I brought in a bag of fresh dog food and he started licking the bag and growling as we moved near it. I just pushed by him and said “move” in a firm voice. He respected that. I knew he was doing growly snappy stuff around kids if they tried to get him to do something he did not want to. We knew is was a serious dog and we were working with him. Then I had a very serious accident and was unable to walk without crutches for several months. This was a sad thing for our dog who sat by my side most of the time but missed out on having me walk, hike and train him the way I wanted. I got better but he did not. One day I left for 30 minutes and he had a chew toy on the floor and was napping. My daughter came down the stairs and went to say hello to him and got in between him and the chew and he lunged and but her mouth. my husband called as I was pulling up. I rushed her to the hospital and a plastic surgeon met us there and she had several layers of stitches to put her top lip back together. We discussed it and even though we had educated our kids and discussed it over and over with them our daughter still was not listening to us. We called our breeder who is amazing and discussed options. We started working with him and trainers and also being pretty versed dog people we all got on board. everything became very tightly watched and controlled. Then our 13 year old lab passed and we moved in the same month. Our dog continued to show extreme aggressiveness and possessive over his dog dish and growling if we made him do anything. We stayed strong and thought is was getting better. Then he bit my sons finger drawing a lot of blood for no reason. He also bit my hand as I walked away from his dog bag. He then started just challenging everyone. He would be super sweet and then if you moved he would snap at you, or if you walked out of the room he would almost come after you. We knew he could not go anywhere and be trusted and not on our watch we also knew that we were stressed when children came over because of his behavior. One night he decided to get on the couch in front of my husband…my husband went to move him and he growled and attempted to bite him. We realized through our year of working with professionals and talking to the breeder that this was it. This dog was alpha/fearful from day one. We have had bullmastiffs from his direct line and never had this problem. We were familiar with strong bullys. Today my heart is broken for what was at moments and what I really wanted. I wanted it to be a success and for our dog to grow old with us. He had those moments but the idea of my child becoming more injured or anyone was more than I could ever live with.
Nellie says
Tomorrow is the day where I must put my almost 9 year old friend to rest for aggressive behavior. This is by far the hardest decision I’ve had to make. Putting a sick dog down is hard to do (I had to do it last year), but you know in your heart that it is suffering, and is in pain. However, with this pup, I feel that I have let him down. That I wasn’t able to train him properly (after 3 or 4 trainers, only very little progress was made). My dog suffers from a back hernia which flairs up every 2-3 months. According to my vet, he is in constant pain, but has “learned” to live with it. Which brings his aggression (bitting, snaps, growls). With a toddler and infant twins at home, I found myself worrying so much that he would bite one of the kids. And that worry became reality last week.
Like you said in the article, it is so hard to put down a pup who between his aggressive “spells” he is a lively and cuddly friend. But when he chooses to act on his aggression, chikd and adults alike are his target. I simply cannot have my beloved pet become a monster. He deserves better… thank you so much for your article. Although my mind was made up and the appointment was made for tomorrow…my heart was having a very hard time. After reading this, my heart, although still breaking, is more at peace. ❤
Tanica says
I have a 2 y.o. purebred boxer that is literally our baby. Knows a lot of commands, loves to go for rides and walks. He even plays hide and seek with my son. So funny, he will hide and we will say Ranger, find Dylan! Sure enough he will drop what he is doing to find him. Hilarious. He is hands down the best dog a family could ask for. Until you bring other people into the picture. Then he turns into a totally different dog. He has been this way since about 4 months old, and I will not believe he wasn’t socialized enough like the breeder has said. We took him everywhere with us and he always growled at people, you couldn’t even let anyone pet him. I have noticed it getting worse but my heart keeps saying he is such a good dog, he can be helped. My daughter had her friend over and he was fine with her after awhile, then she came over again the next day and the dog sniffed her and seemed fine until out of the blue he snipped at her. She had good reflexes and got her hand out of the way, but what if. What if that was my 6 y o sons friend. After 3 trainers and 3 people wanting to give him a new home, they see his true colors and back out. This last trainer I had, Ranger actually lunged for him. Thank goodness he had a muzzle on him. He would not have been so lucky. I was scared and that was when my head jumped into the picture and said hey, this is getting to be too much. I was willing to keep him and just not go anywhere with him and crate him when people came over (that is what an awesome dog he is) but what kind of life is that, for him and us. But that changed this last episode. We wanted a pet to take places, not one that we have to worry about what his next move will be. Don’t get me wrong, like I said—best dog—ever. I had to make the painful decision to call the vet yesterday, and sadly, Thursday will be one of the worst days of our lives. I wonder if anyone else has had to put down there young pet due to aggression. I see many posts but most of them are about sick, or older pets. I need to hear it is okay and there are others out there that have almost the same story. The guilt is literally eating me alive. I have hardly eaten, can’t sleep and cry all the time. I feel that I have given up on my sweet dog, and that isn’t fair to him, although I have done everything I could to help him. 🙁 It still doesn’t make me feel better.
June C Long says
I have a post dated Sept. 19. Yes my dog was just like yours, but one day out of the blue he attacked my great granddaughter. it was a day I will never forget! You are doing the right thing for everyone. I have a friend that kept her dog for 7 years with aggression and said it was like walking on eggshells all the time but a grandbaby came into the family and she made the decision we all have. I pray someday you will have some peace.
Sam says
Tanica yes my jack russel was 18 months old being put to sleep for aggression and that was 6 months ago i know how u feel like urs mine had her good days and then her really bad days where she would attack for nothing the day i decided to have her put to sleep we had gone for a long walk come home fed her she went to sleep next to me on the sofa i was only sitting there watchin tv and for no reason she grabbed my hand and started shakeing my hand i had 5 holes in my hand that was it for me my story is above somewhere from september 2016 thats only partly what shes done shes biten my 4 year old but that was both there faults cz ive never allowed my little one to feed her our food and she tryed to be sneeky and feeed her nd wen i told her no she pulled the food away from the dog and the dog just bit her tryed to go for my dads face you couldnt go in a swimming pool round her cz shed dive in and try to attack u it killed me knowing she had to b put to sleep and being so young too dont get me wrong 6months on i still miss her good side but i know now i did whats best for me my daughter and for my dog ull always miss your dog cause there part the family ??
Angel says
Thank you for this, I just had to euthanize my baby. I love him so much and it was by far one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I just keep thinking to myself that he isn’t troubled anymore.
Ozzy Zane I love you
Valentina says
I need help…please. This is much different situation as the one I have. My fiance’s 5 yr old dog (Mastiv/Rottie) attacks me after after knowing him for 2 years and living with him for 9 months. An5 several weeks after attacking a delivery person at our home. The first attack y two girls where by the door when the delivery man gets near the door and our dog managed to open the door. My attacked took place when I raised my voice, through a cane on the floor and leaned toward my daughter to grab her backpack. He attacked at a level 5. When the girls screamed his bites got worse. Everyone we know says my fiance should have put him down that day. My fiance feels that he doesn’t deserve it as he was protecting the girls. He acknowledges that he made some serious mistakes and is trying to “fix” by seeking professional help. I moved out as he can’t see himself giving up hope on him as he was only protecting my girls. I see both sides…. but what to do? I would like some thoughts from other trainers/people.
Carole says
I have a two year old Springer Spaniel who has taken to putting her teeth on me whenever I either reach at her to correct her for something or if I reach to take something from her.
When I walk her through the neighborhood she is now developing a strange behavior which she did not used to do. If we are on one side of the street walking and she looks ahead and she’s someone on the the same side of the street she stops and looks ahead, then pulls the lease/me to the opposite side if the street to avoid having to walk towards that person.
This troubles me as I think it is fear based on her part. And fearful dogs bite.
She likes people when she actually comes in contact with them, like when a neighbor stops us and we chat, she actually will lay on her back and show her belly, the submissive role. I have a smaller mixed breed dog who she submits to with food. She will let the small dog eat first.
I don’t know what to do with her and fear she’d will get worse. When the Vet gave her her last shots she reached back to put her teeth on the Vet when she gave her a shot. I definitely would not trust her around children. If they tried to take something from her I have no doubt she would bite them.
Kenneth Carson says
We adopted a rescue dog, who we were told had been found in a “hoarding” situation. The owner could not feed or care for all the dogs she had taken in. Later we learned that he had been used as”pitbull training bait”. A kind couple contacted us to let us know that they found him in a ditch, broken, bleeding and half starved. The adoption agency never told us how badly he had been tortured by both dogs AND people. My wife is a dog behavioral therapist and has rehabilitated many rescue dogs. But even she cannot get him – after 2 years of work – to stop ANY of his unbelievable fear aggression issues towards both people and especially other dogs. He has ‘nipped” 3 or 4 friends and attacked a next door neighbor. Fortunately, the neighbor was not hurt, just very scared. We are at the point where we love him but we just don’t think he will ever get over his fear aggression, and it is frightening to watch him go into his hyper aggressive mode. I can’t bear the thought of putting a 2+ year old dog to sleep, but I feel like we are out of options. I’m sick even thinking about it.
Denise Tutas says
This article has been so helpful to me. I was brutally attacked 10 days ago by one of my own dogs. He, and all of my others are rescues and he was abused in his young years so has fear aggression toward people.We had protected him for 10 years, he has always had his own fenced yard, has been to obedience school and is my best behaved dog around me. Something snapped when one of my other male dogs got onto our screened porch and they were barking at each other through the door. I was outside in the yard with Zach and he turned on me. No commands, nothing I could do would stop him. I am so thankful that my husband was at home and
turned the water hose on him. I was fortunate to somehow protect my face and my right arm and leg took the worse of it. I will head with lots of scars but my heart is breaking. We have had to keep Zach in quarantine for 10 days, he cries for me and puts his paw on the fence when I go out to visit him. He licks my hand and face through the wire. Today is day 10 and I have scheduled an appointment with our vet tomorrow morning to euthanize him. The hardest decision I have ever made but I know he will finally have peace and I will see him again.
Kevin says
I had to put down my Male Doberman / Pitbull on 4 May 2016. He was 2.5 years old. He bit my wife, not bad, but bad enough to really scare us. Brutus was very dominant and I was not the best leader. I adopted him from a family (big mistake – Shelters are best). I loved him greatly. Please go to YouTube and search for “Brutus Life Preface”. I still have Lea (the female) she’s great.
Autumn says
I’m sobbing uncontrollably right now…. my heart breaks for all of you…
I’m laying here looking at my right hand that was bitten by my 5 year old pibble on the 14th of this month…. he became aggressive towards our other pibble a few years ago when their leader passed away. They’ve been separated since. I was in the kennel getting food bowls to fill for the night like I always do when my red boy came up and grabbed my brindle by the face and as an immediate response I punched him and said no. He let go alright, long enough to grab my thumb snap it at the knuckle and shredded my flesh… I managed to (or thought I did, in my panic) lock the kennel and run for the bathroom. My brindle is very protective of me and I must have not locked the kennel because they had a hold of each other. I grabbed both their collars and dragged them to the bathroom but my red boy turned and got a hold of my thumb again while he had my brindle still in his mouth… I couldn’t separate them and I ended up kneeing his body into the door ham he let go just long enough for me to push my brindle into the back corner of our shower stall, I put myself in between them. I screamed at my red to get out now and pointed to the door.
The empty look disappeared he had and he immediately got this sad look and walked out of the bathroom. I stood and told my brindle to stay (he listens to me especially when I’m in distress) I directed my red to the kitchen I slammed and locked the bathroom door with me inside with my brindle. It was truly a nightmare and I was so scared…. it looked like a murder scene in my bathroom. My brindle come out of the stall shaking covered in my blood and I started cleaning him off trying to call my husband and stop my bleeding. I called my neighbor who’s a great friend, he came over, locked up my red boy and came to the rescue. He looked at my hand mangled and bleeding… I called my mom to come sit with my 2 brindles and my neighbor (god bless him he’s such a great friend) he cleaned up every bit of blood and straightened everything back up that night.
X-rays showed my top knuckle was shattered there was nothing left. So I have pins and wire and a laceration 2/3 around my thumb. It was truly the 1st time I was terrified to come home and see my red boy…. I had some alone time with him, I put my forehead on his and all I could ask was why, and that I was sorry for hurting him…. my husband believes something has just snapped in his head and he will never be the same boy…. we’ve had him since he was 5 weeks old. He was brought up in a loving home around all kinds of siblings (snakes, cats, fish, ferrets, turtles, dogs) even foster dogs. But he has lost whatever he had… the light in his eyes is gone and it breaks my heart because he’s my baby, my big ol lug… he’s beautiful and so very very smart…. I’m laying next to him and he still lays his head on my back and cuddles me like a human would…. I can’t make the decision to put him down but I can’t rehome him because the guilt I would feel if someone else was to get hurt…. I’d never forgive myself. I love him so much but he’s just not the bubbly soul I raised…. I’m so torn and people call me crazy for not putting him down immediately…. my dogs are my heart and soul they are my very purpose for being on this earth. I feel like I’ve failed them…. someone please help 🙁
SooBet says
Thank you for your post. I have spent the vast part of today reading this through my tears.
Yesterday we had to make the hardest most horrendous decision of our lives, and its with the most gut wrenching sadness that we had to let little Darcey ” the beagle” 5 years old only a baby go over rainbow bridge. far too soon.
We had struggled with her from a very young age with issues of aggression, unpredictable aggression and had over the years bitten every one of our adult family.
Two different dog psychologists and the assistance of vetenary therapy failed to stop this aggression.
Everything in our power, everything we could have done and more, could not get this out of her.
Last week she viciously attacked our 12 old dog PennyLane. This this aggressive behaviour could no longer be tolerated.
We did seek professional advice from not only our own vet but a specialist in Manchester who both came to the conclusion that this was our only option.
My troubled little grandbeagle girl is no longer with us, we will grieve and miss her of a great deal. I doubt that these feelings of guilt and failure for her will ever go away. The love I felt for this little girl is indescribable. I am we are BROKEN
ROX says
Thank you for the information and gentle generous consideration of the horror that is making this kind of decision. I have had to make it twice and for the sake of clarity will explain.
We adopted Logan a bouvier puppy when he was about 10 weeks old, he showed signs of dominance early on but we did not think anything of it until he started attacking our other dogs. He grew rapidly, far exceeding the normal size of his breed showing slight but noticeable signs of breeding issues. He became impossible to walk because he would attach any dog that came close to us. Soon he became territorial over me and would growl at my husband for coming near me, or if I move out of my bedroom at night. He made the bottom of my bed his territory and would not move with out attempting to bite who ever was trying to get him out.
It escalated to the.point where I had to mussel him in his sleep so I could get him outside. ON his last night with us, I was in the shower and I could see him clearly, my 4 year old (dog loving) daughter stumbled into my room and my heart stopped. Logan was fine during the day but nights were always a gamble. My daughter approached him and sat next to him and he bit her out of nowhere. For the rest of the night he layed under my bed growling at me whenever we moved, I was trapped.
The next morning I snuck out and opened the front door, I made a large bang and he bolted into the garden, I locked the door behind me.
I spoke to the vet later that morning, he suggested I bring Logan in, it took 5 men to hold him down to mussel him, after which the vet recommended euthanasia. In the end when the meds kicked in he had his head on my lap, I sang to him as he fel asleep with out a mussel or fear, just love. What the vet said after was that unpredictable dogs are extremely dangerous, I knew that, but i still cry for my boy, he was mine and I still feel like I failed him.
A year later we tried to adopt another male, this time a little rescue who we vetted before bringing home. He seemed perfect at first but then stopped allowing people of colour near our home. He had a hate relationship with my neighbours dogs, barking none stop and bolting for them at any chance when we opened the gate to leave for come home.
This eventually resulted in him becoming very injured because of the Rottweiler next door. From that point he became impossible, he started attacking our other dogs, and any dog neer us on our walks. He allowed the trainer in but would decide half way though the session that he no longer wanted her there to the point where the trainer asked me to put him inside out of fear as he was passing the patio.And growling at her.
I sent him to stay with my sister on a farm thinking a brake from the Rottweiler could be a solution. He immediately tried to bite my brother in law and refused for any staff to come into or near the house. He then started jumping the fence and bit my brother in law who tried to get him inside. Eventually he chased the car down the road a well, the road was used by.workers walking to work. We searched for him, not just concerned for his safely but that of the people walking to work.
Eventually we found him back outside their house and he immediately went for both of us but responded to my voice. We took him to the vet to have him checked out but the vet recommended that he be put down given the risk he posed to everyone and animal around him. The alternative was a cage….. And my heart sank t my shoes.
Once again I found myself in tears holding a beloved boy in my arms whispering “we love you” wile he slipped away to a calmer and better place because of something we did not see common and could not fix.
What all of this has shown me is that taking on any pet is a massive risk. You take a chance and hope that there is no genetic mess up that will transform your beloved puppy into a territorial nightmare . Or that the damage experienced by a seemingly perfect rescue will not manifest into another nightmare when triggered.by a traumatic attack.
Thankfully we do have success stories to turn to, like Ben rescued at age 9 who was the most incredible companion and gave us 4years of love before cancer took him. Quinn and Iva who have always just been great natured and tempered pooches remain their happy selves regardless of get trauma they received by being attacked constantly by the two boys.
I am and always be a dog person and miss my boys very much, remembering them for their good days and trying to reconcile my heart about the bad ones.
My advise is that this is an impossible decision to make, one the few people understand. Sometimes you need to make this decisions to the sake of others because rehoming a troubled dog is passing the buck and the danger outweighs everything. Having pets that add value to your heart and home compares to nothing else, they are family. Having to give the authorisation for ending that.life because of impossible circumstances is a pain that is unimaginable and a journey I would not wish on anyone
Moira says
I face this very difficult decision tomorrow with my dog 🙁 it’s D-Day for him (my baby boy) because after 2 years working with him to see if his prey drive toward my son could be cured – he has only gotten worse – assisted in his behavior via jerk neighbor kids that continually tease him through our fence … it angers and saddens me that through all our work he still wants to bite and behaves feral and amped up prey driven with my son.
The day I first made the decision was 5 months ago. I was trying to supervise and see if my dog’s behavior had changed yet – I was holding my son on my lap and my dog was being cautiously polite – and carefully sniffing – but when I readjusted my son to stand up, my dog took the opportunity to try and grab him by the ribs and pull him out of my hands! fortunately he only managed to lightly pinch my son and had mainly grabbed his shirt – but that was it.
With my son getting old enough to potentially learn to open the back door and climb baby gates – it’s no longer an “if” but “when” a horrifying attack could happen – and I would rather be proactive, rather than sorry that my child was maimed or killed. I weighed all the options – QOL would be HORRIBLE if my dog was secluded to a Fort Knox pen … rehoming isn’t an option, it’s too risky … training, supervision and constant tries toward behavior modification have failed … my other dog is outside as his companion ALL-THE-TIME and my other dog’s QOL is affected also by this. I have had to seclude my dogs instead of allowing them to be a part of the family as they used to be – one for the dangers he poses, and the other because he is the “companion” that keeps the other from howling and being an emotional wreck.
It has to stop. I didn’t listen to my gut with a different/unrelated dog in my family that was exhibiting “rage syndrome” with unknown/random triggers and when she flipped out, she mauled one of her pack mates to death. Vets, Trainers and Kennel Techs ALL talked me out of euthanizing her when she began acting this way and suggested training and spay – training maintained her (and she was fine with me) but spaying amplified ALL her aggressive behaviors.
So in this current situation – I already KNOW the guilt associated with not listening to one’s gut. I refuse to make that same mistake again with my son (or someone else’s child for that matter) at risk. If anyone else is struggling with this decision, please know that there’s a point where human or animal safety and your peace of mind is more important than listening to the judgements of others. I have struggled with this decision for two years – knowing that the likely outcome was my dog being PTS – while hoping I could manage him. It’s just no longer safe to do so.
I am going to take him out and lavish affection on him, bawl my eyes out and just rip the band aide off :'( If there’s a small mercy I can give him, it’s that he will fall asleep, fully loved, in my arms and be forever in my heart.
C says
I wanted to leave a comment to say how helpful this article and your comments have been. I hope that my story will help someone else going through this. I sincerely sympathize with this horrible decision.
I have a 6 year old Rottweiler mix I adore. We found him in our neighborhood at just 2 months old and kept him ever since. 90% of the time he is a trainer, well behaved, loving, playful, hyper doggy. He is part of my family.
At first when he was small, he would get under my bed. That’s when we first saw the other side of him. Like Jekyll and Hyde. I had no idea who this viscous dog was. He would chomp your arm off if you tried to get him out of there. We could only get him to come out with treats or food. But that was the only problem we had so I kept him. He had no issues with my other dogs or small children. He would be fine, but then jumpy or nervous like with his tales between his legs out of no where.
At the vet it took multiple people to muzzle him and hold him down. He has growled and snapped at pet groomers too.
When he turned 4, I had him on my lap as usual while sitting on the couch. Out of no where he growled so I put him on the floor. While putting him down he bit me. You could see the bone in my arm, it was the most traumatizing event that has happened to me. He only did one bite and stood there in an attack stance.
The next week a friend came over to pet him as usual, and he bit my friend’s finger. One bite again. Luckily not as bad as my injury. Someone mentioned once he “tastes blood” he would bite more. But twice in 1 week??
We basically try not to reprimand him or bother him. We can’t grab him or pick him up. He’s now 6 and bit me again. I was spanking our other dog, and happened to bump into the aggressive dog sitting behind me. He lunged at me and went chasing after me, multiple snaps and bites. I used a pillow between us and trying kicking his body. He still got to my arm and bit me again breaking skin. This has happened a few times where we set him off and he goes after me. Not one bite, but following and jumping at me.
It breaks my heart, because I know it has to be something he was born with, possibly because he is of mixed breeds. And most of the time he is a playful sweetie. I am sure he is suffering too with all the nervousness and daily fear we see in him. We also want to have children soon and I cannot live in fear the dog will attack. We are scared to have guests because we don’t know how he will react. We are scared we will set him off. He runs our house and we can’t live with it anymore. We’ve been crying and struggling with what to do. But we cannot afford a professional trainer, or legal bills if something happens. We are scared to give him away to someone who he may attack . This is one of the hardest things we ever had to do. But your article is helping us to go through with it. I pray to God it is the right decision. I will always love and miss him.
BBB says
Spanking your other dog? ……. -_-
I had to put down my five year old rescue pup today. After dabbling in behavior training (he wasn’t food motivated), interviewing multiple foster homes, mitigating our behavior and his environment, and three years of growing aggression with more than six serious biting incidents with unpredictable triggers as well as attacks on other dogs, and given we have children, it was decided the best course of action was to euthanize.
I do not regret the decision. What I regret was the way I went about it. My pup was very protective of me, so we had an incredibly great one-on-one relationship. But I had to isolate myself and him in order for that to happen. He was born in another country with a feral mom and dad so his behavior very well could have been what he was born with. His lack of food motivation made it extremely difficult, if not impossible, to train. I digress….
I decided to take him to the vet and given my emotional state, it wasn’t ideal considering I wanted to keep a sound frame of mind. Close friends/family offered to come along but I really thought I should be alone. He was extremely stressed in the waiting room, and by the time we got to the visiting room, he was panting and pacing. The vet gave him a sedative and the shot made him yelp – through his muzzle – which made me very emotional because I didn’t want him in pain. After the final shot, I stayed with his body for a while.
What I would have done differently was euthanizing at home and if that is not an option, I would have taken his body with me and made burial arrangements. If burial isn’t an option, at least get the ashes. Leaving him on the cold floor of the vet felt so wrong. I wish I would have done it differently.
I love and miss you so much TJ. So very much.
Kristina says
I am so relieved to have stumbled across this article. My dog has a lot of aggressive issues, I rescued him when he was 7 now at 8.5 years old and after much specialized training I still do not feel he is safe around strangers. My family seems to think this is a ‘no brainer’ and that I have to use my head and not my heart to make this choice. But I love my dog, he is amazing with me and my kids, we go hiking and paddle boarding and I do my best to keep him away from others…but I know accidents happen and I’m terrified that one of my kids friends will walk in unannounced and I wont have time to grab him. He has charged after the neighborhood kids growling and snapping at them and I’ve always just barley managed to grab him in time.
I don’t know what the right answer is, but its a relief to know I’m not the only one in this predicament, and that others have struggled with their decision also.
Kristen says
Thank you for this post. We had to put down our 9 year old Corgi because he bit me and my husband several times, our toddler, and my brother-in-law. Many of these were unprovoked. We had Sulley since he was 8 weeks old and was a great dog until he was charged at by pit bulls a couple of years ago. It was like a flip switched and he was fearful and aggressive all the time. We couldn’t take him to the dog park anymore, which he loved. It became so bad that he reflexively would bite someone if startled. We managed the behavior issues with obedience and that worked until he sustained a cruciate tear. We had been rehabilitating him for the last two months by keeping him in his crate. He was increasingly unhappy and being unable to exercise, he was getting more aggressive (i.e. growling at my husband and toddler for no reason). Last week, he aggravated his injury and was in obvious pain. It was because of this pain, the difficulty with rehabilitation, the aggressive behavior, and his general unhappiness that we decided to put him to sleep. We made the decision on Thursday and put him down last night. I have been a wreck since the decision was made. We stayed with him throughout and gave him all of our love. This was such a difficult decision, but I couldn’t put my daughter in danger or keep him in pain because I love him so much and want him to be here. We gave him the best life we could, paid for the best medical care (he even had a crown and a root canal), kept him safe, but we couldn’t reach the recesses of his mind where his fear ruled him and caused him to act out. Thank you all for sharing your stories, I am sobbing as I write this and would do anything to have changed this outcome.
Monica says
I am thankful for those that have shared their stories and I hope the understanding and empathy for why it’s sometimes necessary to put our beloved pets down eases the pain of those that have gone through that very difficult decision.
I’m also facing that decision and it hurts my heart each time I try to consider what to do.
Emma came to my husband and I as a rescue when she was four months. She’d been living at in a horse stall, and I don’t know much about the conditions there. She’s a lab boxer mix and has been high anxiety from day one. She also had major separation anxiety. She tore out nails in an effort to get out of a crate, and injured her snout, so we didn’t crate her and instead kept her in a rather large laundry room while away from home. My husband and I worked staggered hours, so he left early and came home before noon and was able to be home the rest of the day. I left later, so she wasn’t home alone very long. Our son had just started high school at the time, so he also left for school a little later in the morning. We discussed her issues with the vet, tried behavior training, medication, and plenty of exercise in addition to good old attention and love. She destroyed plants, books, clothes, shoes, basically anything that was within reach if we weren’t in a room watching her every move. But we loved her and we stuck with it. Thousands of dollars went by and we still couldn’t get through her behavioral issues. The separation anxiety remained. Medication had no effect and after a couple years we didn’t bother giving her medication. We managed it by staying home. Emma is also dog aggressive. We took her with us to visit my mother in law once, and Emma attacked and tried to kill my mother in law’s small dog. If my husband hadn’t been right there, she would have. She had taken it down by the throat in an instant. I think it was over a bowl of water.
Two years in with Emma, Wilson was a “free to a good home” 3 month old German shepherd St. Bernard mix that my son, and of course eventually I, brought home. He was a big teddy bear, but shy, and I should have seen that as a red flag and taken him back from the very beginning. But the big brown eyes melted all our hearts and he stayed. Even Emma took a liking to him, so we thought that was a good thing. So Wilson and Emma became great friends and despite Emma’s continued anxiety, everything seemed to be going well. During Wilson’s 6 month check up at the vet I asked about neutering and she said she didn’t like to neuter before a year because of some studies showing cancer risks. Unfortunately, by 8 months Wilson had started to show signs of aggression despite regular socializing. On walks he started backing up growling at people walking by. In the yard, he would lunge at strangers that walked by our property. He started growling at our son’s friends that came to the house. I took him back to the vet and this time she seemed like she didn’t remember advising me to wait, and actually got angry and asked why I hadn’t had him neutered at 6 months! I was shocked! I reminded her she had advised me to wait, and she just remained irritated and scheduled him to be neutered. I don’t know that the two months made a huge difference, but he’s remained very overly protective and fear aggressive. When I take him to the vet, he shakes so bad, then he growls at anyone that tries to take him to a room. I can’t get him groomed anywhere for just a bath and nails. I used to be able to take him to one location, but the kid that worked there that was really good with him moved, and no one wants to work with him now. He shakes when I go in the door and growls at everyone. He bit the hand of one of my sons friends when he tried to pet him. It didn’t break the skin, but I was worried, so I started making sure Wilson was put away when friends were over. That certainly didn’t help his socialization, but I didn’t need someone’s child being bit.
We adjusted our lives, managed the dogs, walked them during “non busy” hours, didn’t have company, and didn’t go away from home for extended periods. There was an entire ritual we had to go through to alleviate some of Emma’s anxiety just to go to the grocery store if we both left the house together.
Emma is now 8 and Wilson is 6.
Unfortunately, during this time I had a stroke and my husband and I divorced. Since my husband was still working, and I could no longer work, I moved out with the dogs and have taken care of them the best I can. With my being home, Emma’s separation anxiety is doing ok. However, health is now declining further and I have to move into a small apartment closer to medical resources. My ex-husband previously said if it ever got to be too much with the dogs, he would take them. Now he is not.
I sit here after so much thought of what is best for Wilson and Emma. I cannot rehome them.
Wilson has been very aggressive towards other people and has only not bitten more people because he’s been kept away from them. He very overly protective of me and he’s very fear aggressive.
Emma has severe anxieties. She licks her dog bed until it’s saturated with saliva. She can’t be left alone in a room with a closed door or she’ll scratch the entire doorframe until her claws are torn up, barking the entire time. As long as I’m sitting on the couch reading, she’s happy. If I’m moving around talking on the phone, she gets so anxious, she starts into her compulsive behaviors. She’s extremely aggressive towards other dogs. She and Wilson are best friends and yet she’s been aggressive towards him over food. Sometimes he lets her and sometimes he doesn’t.
I worry that if I try to rehome Wilson, he’ll bite someone, get abused, and end up euthanized. He growls if a stranger tries to look him in the eyes.
If I rehome Emma, I worry she’ll destroy someone’s house as she’s done my own in the past, be abused for doing so, or maybe she’ll attack and kill someone’s dog, and eventually end up at the pound to be euthanized. I sometimes wonder if Emma’s anxiety caused Wilson to become so fear aggressive, but I think based on how shy he was when we first got him it was there already. And despite socializing he continued to get worse and worse as he got older. Now he’s 6 and I keep him in the bedroom if my grandkids come over.
But I’ll have to move now to this small apartment, and I can’t take either one with me. And I can’t rehome them without worries that they’ll hurt someone or another dog, and then worry how they’ll be treated, and how scared they’ll be and how Emma’s anxieties will be so bad for her, and Wilson’s fear will be so bad for him. It’s just so gut wrenching to think of it and it kills me to think they’d be better off being put down, but I don’t know what else to do. No one will take and care for two dogs that need the special attention both of these require. If I wasn’t sick, I could just keep doing it like I’ve been until it’s their natural time. I feel horrible.
Monica says
I just read over my own post above, and it doesn’t really convey the level of aggression from Wilson. I know as read other posts, it talked about people being bit multiple times before considering PTS their beloved pet. Wilson is extremely aggressive and has almost gone through a glass door to get at a delivery person he saw across the street. He hasn’t bit and caused stitches only because I have kept him separated when strangers need to work on the house, visitors come over, or other people come inside the house. It’s because he’s so aggressive I keep him in the bedroom. He’s a wonderful dog with me, but he’s a nightmare with anyone else. I had a vet ask me to muzzle him before I brought him for a visit, and she sedated him just for an exam. This was after I moved from my regular vet, and Wilson was new to her, but he’s definitely stranger aggressive.
I guess I only felt I needed to be more clear about his aggression because if I were reading my own post as a stranger might, I’d say, that Wilson dog doesn’t sound very aggressive. It just sounds like you never gave him a chance to get to know people. He’s been socialized well. He’s just very aggressive and I have to keep him separated from people so he doesn’t bite them. I love that dog so much, it breaks my heart to look at him right now. He’s wonderful to me, but no one else. One of those one person dogs I read about in some of the other posts I guess…… I have no idea how I’ll get through this decision.
kim says
I am so glad to have found this post and have printed it to read in quiet. I have two dogs that have separate aggression issues. I rescued mom and she had 8 puppies. One had to be euthanized because I couldn’t, in good conscience, adopt him out once I consulted with a behavioral specialist who said he didn’t do anything normal for a puppy (at about 9 months by that time). I homed five of the pups, had to take one to SPCA because she upset the apple cart (couldn’t agree that momma was the alpha dog). I tried to take the last pup to SPCA at the same time but she snapped at the handler during the behavior test (had only planned to keep momma dog). They wouldn’t take her so I kept her. I took care of them, built an 8 foot fence because they could jump my fence, put in dig defence because the younger dug out, and loved them. Then I had the opportunity to take my kids on a week long vacation – I couldn’t hire a dog sitter as I couldn’t trust them with anyone else. I couldn’t board them just anywhere because they could attack another dog or kennel care giver. I found a board and train that specialized in dogs with issues. She board/trained them for three weeks (only one of which I was out of town and only two of which I paid for). She kept them the third week because she had worked so hard to adjust their behavior and wanted more time. Her instructions to me were to not board them anywhere but with her, not ever take them to the dog park, walk only on leash with a special collar that slipped loose when relaxed (not a standard choke chain) with a secondary chain in case one slipped, and for three months after I got them back from her they were crated if they weren’t in a controlled situation being walked or quiet play. I cannot have ‘fun’ with these dogs. Momma is aggressive probably related to having had puppies and hormone issues causing a traumatic hysterectomy. She will lung at any other dog in the vicinity and (as is often normal) will attack the younger of the two (her daughter) if they are in the yard and someone or a dog approaches the gate. Daughter dog is just kind of special we say. You really never know what her reaction will be. She is reactionary aggressive. Momma is more territorial aggressive but the two of them together is virtually unmanageable. I have just been dealing with it for 8.5 years (so they are 8.5 and approximately 9.5 years old). This morning the pup had gotten sick and in the crate and I wanted to take her on leash to the front yard to rinse her off. Momma got out and I was terrified that she would get too far away for me to catch up to her and she would attack a dog in their front yard (some of my neighbors do that). It was stupid of me to do what I did but I had thought maybe by this point she wouldn’t bolt. Now I am thinking that their quality of life (constantly anxious) and mine are just not good enough to continue this way. I invested over $3000 in their training and it didn’t change them much – changed me and made me even more aware of their issues. I can only board with this one person because of their behavior and she could close her business at any minute. I am a single mom and the dogs have taken so much (my kids can’t have anyone over). In first reading your article is just what I need to read to help me understand (for example, they can seem very sweet at times but I can’t relax because of what I think might happen). I have had dogs my whole life and never experienced anything like this. My last two dogs I helped to very old age. My heart hurts for my girls (we call them “the girls” when referring to them – they aren’t even referred to as dogs because that isn’t how we have had dogs in the past).
Darin says
This article was very helpful. I see I’m not the only one who has had to make this very difficult decision.
Our 7 year old German Shepherd had to be put to sleep. He had trouble with socialization with other dogs as he was picked on as a pup by another dog before I owned him. He attacked our Golden Retriever in 2015 to the point of bringing blood around her neck and then last night he attacked me. It’s been a terribly difficult decision to make but this article hits the nail on the head. He was loyal until the very end though even as I walked him in. I’m going to miss my friend.
I feel for anyone who ends up having to face this in their life.
Tanica says
June C. Long and Sam, it has been awhile and I want to thank you for your comforting words. Although it has not gotten any easier, it was nice to hear your stories to know we are truly not alone. We are all on this horrible guilt ridden ship together.
Autumn, I know exactly how you feel, I spent a year and half trying to “cure” our Ranger and it took one incident to make me start thinking with my head, not my heart as much as it hurt me and my 9 y.o son. That is what I think was the most painful, having to look at and explain it to him that Ranger was not coming home.
Moira, I know all too well how you feel. Family comes first, but it is so hard, since our pets are our family too. Some people just don’t get that. Praying for you.
BBB, my husband had to take Ranger in and he didn’t want to be there but with his aggression they asked that he hold him against the wall and the gate so they could give him a sedative before the shot. Then he too was just laid on the cold hard floor. He told me this when I got home and it was like I was there with him. I wish I didn’t know that and feel horrible he and Ranger had to go through that as I feel terrible for you and your TJ. That IS no way to go but sometimes we are in such grief, we don’t know it is happening the way it is. God bless.
Kristina, I was so very glad to come across this article as well, it hurts my heart every day but with wonderful people on this blog, it has helped me a lot in my despair.
Monica, it hurts sooo much, so I will say to you as I was told by other kind souls, it is the right thing to do. I still am living with regret and guilt.
I was fortunate enough to not have Ranger bite anyone, but my heart still breaks today knowing what I did and breaks for all of you as well. I am so thankful to have found this article and all of you. I still go in from time to time to read others stories in hopes it will help me find some peace of mind. It hasn’t as of yet but I hope this blog continues on, thank you everyone and Patricia too. Take care, God bless. Tanica
Dawn Smyth says
Like Diane, My dog bit me as I was trying to clean his butt. I was very very careful because he has bitten before. This time he bit my hand and I needed shot, antibiotics, etc. I am elderly and it will take a long time to heal. My husband has never disciplined the dog and he has threatened me if I have him put down. The problem is that my husband leaves for pleasure trips several times a year and no one else will take care of this dog. I won’t be cruel and not feed him or take care of him.
Kimba says
He was my dad’s beloved dog. Tiger—8 pound multipoo…somewhere along the way we realized he had “a screw loose” but from watching “the dog whisperer” we knew it was us and not him. Small dog, asserting itself, that’s all. My dad died a very slow and painful death with most of his affliction being undiagnosed until it was too late. So as Tiger—who is the cutest sweetest thing ever and so very, very smart with well over 50 toys knowing each one by name—unpredictably bit my mom or me, he probably should have been put down but my dad would not have been able to cope without him, even after he attacked my face and tore up my lip, even after the one and only time Tiger tore up Dad’s hands….
When Dad died February 2014, Tiger was 12 and exceedingly healthy and fun and we had figured out for a year or so what to do and not to do to prevent an aggressive reaction and how to de-escalate if he did turn and attack. Mom had to move to a small apartment and she kept Tiger another year but he was under foot, she had increasing pain in knees and hips, Tiger was aggressive with others in the retirement community (even with severe warnings NOT to approach him, old people see a cute little dog and have to try to pet or pick him up) so the community told her she had to put him down. She called and told me, I asked her to wait till I could get there to say goodbye. Her descriptions made him sound sick and crazy and this was just before Thanksgiving 2015.
When I got there, he was lively and loving and energetic and playful…I saw none of the physical stuff she described—she said he cried a lot and wandered around the house and slept most of the time and then she never knew when he would suddenly be right under her or attack her. I took him home with me. Because he was rarely home alone I was concerned about leaving him home 10 hours a day—even though Dad had trained him to use a pee pad in the shower, needing to go out wasn’t the problem, being home alone for hours on end as a 13 year old lap dog seemed it might be. The high school where I teach has a doggy daycare program. At first it was great—though Tiger had never really been socialized or car trained…so those were tough hurdles…then at the end of school when kids (the caretakers of the animals) are nervous and excited about the end of school and finals, he snapped at them when they took off his leash, so he was expelled from doggy daycare. He won’t let his groomer trim or shave his face any more. He also fights me on giving him a bath.
So I could go on three week’s vacation, Mom “babysat” Tiger this summer. He was increasingly worse—she left his leash on for over a week…because he wouldn’t let her take it off…so he dragged it around the apartment, slept with it, and so forth. Taking off his leash or his collar or his harness is a violent ordeal. When I first got back, his state of mind shifted so I could take off the leash and the harness. He seemed so happy and free. Then the second day, he was aggressive again. I finally got the leash off and now the last few days I have walked him at odd times without the leash hoping to avoid people and dogs—he’s been miraculously good about where he goes and watching for me and following me!!! But now I am home and it’s a different neighborhood and though I live at the end of the cul-de-sac, security and neighbors are far more known to one another and out—so now there’s an issue of traffic, too. He is now nearly 16. He plays but then it’s like he forgets what he’s doing or gets distracted and walks away from the toy he just chased. Other habits have shifted. He eats and drinks well, has a very strong heart and is quite healthy.
As a teacher, I don’t have the financial resources to work with a trainer or vet; and over the last year when I have tried to discuss the problem with two different vets (same clinic), their response is all about how healthy he is and how much he obviously loves me and is connected with me. All true. And paralyzing. I have struggled with complicated grief over the loss of my dad and this all just complicates it further. He is such a smart and entertaining little dog—great personality otherwise, very engaging and interactive. But then he has these unpredictable (the stuff that is predictable, I stay away from, have learned certain triggers) attacks and now the whole issue with the leash. It is beyond difficult to consider putting him down but I think I’m going to have to but it feels like murder and betrayal—betrayal of my dad as well as betrayal of this little fabulous dog who also has that trusting and solicitous look in his eyes, which are nearly blind and he’s nearly deaf…so I know these debilitations are a factor in his reactions but not completely. Compounding the problem is having two vets pretty much tell me it is not time to put him down. Mom, of course, is supportive but that’s a complicated relationship otherwise right now. I simply feel very much alone in the decision, and very much like I’m being selfish—yes it would be so nice to be free of him; I never wanted a dog, I have no business owning a pet, I am selfish with my time and energy—I give a hundred thousand percent at school and then I need to be left alone to live my life otherwise and that includes not having any one or any thing dependent upon me. THIS is part of the emotional plague, that I am trying to justify what I of course know is ultimately inevitable anyway! What’s the ultimate maximum time left for a 16 year old dog? Four years? Maybe? I can deal with avoiding triggers for every other aggression EXCEPT the issue of the leash. I have tried everything…I don’t know what’s behind it. I try to distract him…wait till he has a shift of thought…and it’s hit or miss when I finally succeed—I have not yet detected a suitable pattern or solution.
I truly appreciate your story and your article and it has helped to hear this is not just in my head or something that could be easily fixed with a rehoming (impossible at his age I would think); most importantly was the comment you made that sometimes we simply can’t fix the problem. I love this dog. I would do anything for him. I was even surprised how much I missed him while I traveled—so I have a taste of the heartache once he’s gone and that would be so much more compounded if it is at my own hand.
But in trying to be fair to myself and doing the best for him ultimately, I am still very emotionally conflicted about taking his life. Your questions about being able to live with a “worse attack” or “sending someone else to the hospital” are also helpful…and yet I feel something like an idiot that I see and understand all of this, and still it seems impossible to DO. All of this at this point has everything to do with how I am thinking about it, how I am framing the issue (“justifying” the issue is the internal criticism). Comes down to belief, doesn’t it? So it’s all always in our head—how we think, how we reason, how we attach meaning, how we frame a situation or a decision. Still, knowing even all of that does not help make this easier. Perhaps I am waiting for that emotional certainty (we Americans equate pain and painful feelings as bad and wrong…oi) that this is best. I am processing more about how he reacts after he realizes he just tried to attack—he immediately whimpers and withdraws and appears to be ashamed or at least aware it was not the right thing for him to do. That’s a kind of suffering isn’t it? To recognize you cannot control a vicious impulsive reaction? Yet, all of his emotions are my projections. Right? His attacks are simple trigger responses as a result of an increasingly addled brain and instinctive misfiring of some sort. He is clearly dependent upon me as all pets are, and he clearly trusts me—up to a point (or there wouldn’t be a reflex attack impulse, would there?).
Looks as if no one has written comments since 2015 so I guess it’s possible you won’t see this; besides, you’ve already said you can’t make this decision for anyone else. But you also asked for the story, and I couldn’t resist spilling it out a little to hear myself think, though I hope you do read this; and if you have an idea, a direction, an insight, any comment, I am open.
Tesha says
I have a situation with my 2 year old shih tzu chiuahu Sammy who is my world. This dog literally means everything to me. I don’t want to type it all. I’m in tears for even considering putting her down but I would like to talk to you and discuss my options. I need to make the best choice and I understand sometimes it’s not easy to hear but I need to know what the right choice is. Could you please contact me by email. I feel lost and alone and I am at a point in my life where I’m supposed to be the happiest. I’m 4 weeks away from my due date with my little girl and my husband has been trying to get me to put my dog down for months now. She is aggressive towards him and with a baby on the way. I need to make the right choice. Please. It would mean alot to me if you could contact me. Thank you
Wilma Edie says
My ESS, 2 year old male, has just seriously attacked me for the third time in 8 months, requiring a hospital trip this last time for paper stitches, dressings and antibiotics. He is out in the works van with my husband all day, getting plenty of exercise (at least 2 hour long free running walks to the beach) He is fine with other dogs and humans while out, gives them a wide berth, but when at home I am very wary of him. As long as I ignore him while he is in “his place” in the hall where his open crate is things are OK……most of the time….but 2 of his attacks, both drawing blood, have happened here. The last attack (without any warning) was when I walked into the living room where my husband had just been playing with the dog and he just went for me, biting my forearm in several places. This needed a hospital A&E visit. Several months ago, after the first attack, we took him to get neutered, as we had heard this might help, but half an hour after leaving him at the vet’s, they called us to pick him up as they could get near him to give him his pre op med. No other advice was given ! My husband obviously loves his “work companion ” and as we have no children, would be devestated to contemplate having the dog PTS, but I’m typing this with my arm bandaged from wrist to elbow and would appreciate sound advice.
Wilma Edie says
AMMENDMENT
Re last post. ..I meant to say the vet couldn’t get near him to give his pre op meds …
Brittany says
I know this an old post but stumbling across it today has provided me with some comfort. I was forced to make this decision just yesterday. Our almost 14 year old lab mix we have had since she was 6mths started having extremely aggressive fits about food, water and her crate she once loved to lay in. She was an amazing dog and was our first “baby” together. She loved water and were always able to take her around other dogs and people. She was super easy to train in her early years. In fact house training was a sinch she only ever really had one accident. The only sign of any behavior problem when she was young was chewing which was easily corrected. She was even amazing almost 3 yrs ago when we brought out daughter home. Always napping right beside her and alerting me when she made the smallest sound over the monitor We loved her dearly but for some unknown reason with the last year she stared going into aggressive fits that I can beat decribe as being possessed over strange things. The first bite was me over me trying not I had take out now toddlers bib she had gotten off the table from her. We took her to the vet after the incident to look for medical causes. She had started to become obsessed with water so we were convinced she wa diabetic or having kidney trouble. To our dismay all of the expansive test the vet ran came back clean with no answers to why she was acting this way. We couldn’t bring ourselves to make that decision then and kept saying we would just have to be more careful. The fits starting getting worse to the point she had trapped me in the pantry while she was trying to get the empty trash can. Still we made excuses saying the aggression was only directed at me for some reason so we just needed to keep our daughter away from her. She had also started having skin infections back to back so the vet thought crushings or thyroid problems but still all tests revealed no medical answers. Then about two weeks ago her aggression turn towards my husband attacking his hand when he went to let her breakint the end of his thumb and ripping the nail off. For two weeks, we made sure to keep her in her crate or in the backyard behind a locked privacy fence. Then Friday I came home to find that she had destroyed her crate escaping and destroying the carpet in the room she was in. It became clearer that her behaviors were endangering our daughter, us, our marriage and now our poor doggies own safety. We were forced to make the difficult decision yesterday quickly before we procrastinated again. The vet tech who did it was amazing and cried with my husband. I had to stay behind with our toddler. I think this is making closure a little harder. I’m trying to remind myself our sweet girl had to be suffering from something either a mental illness or medical problem we just couldn’t find and it was the best thing to do to end her suffering and protect our family. Sorry for the long post not sure if anyone will see it but typing my story helped a little as it’s hard to not hear nails on the hardwood floor or see her waiting for me at the backdoor. I can’t bring myself to remove her food from the pantry just yet.
Trisha says
Brittany: I did indeed read your post (I read them all, always), and just want to say: I’m so sorry that you were put in the horrible position of putting your dog down. And to say how proud you should be of making the best possible decision. Reading it from the outside looking in, your dog was without question terribly ill, probably a neurological issue in the frontal cortex (just guessing), one that radically changes behavior. I’m so sorry you are missing her so much; I hope that soon the wonderful memories you have of her will replace the grief of losing her.
Brittany says
Thank you for your reply. You don’t know how much it means that you took the time to do that. The biggest struggle has been the guilt of doing it and for someone looking in to say it really was the only option helps. It doesn’t make the pain go away but makes me feel a little less eaten up by the guilt,
Sue says
I feel so blessed that I came across this site. This is like a support group to me.– Yesterday we put our 6 year old shepherd to sleep. She was the most wonderful and loyal dog to us and our family, but not with strangers and other dogs. We got her from a breeder when she was 7 weeks old and I kindly asked the breeder if she could keep her for another month to be with her mother(bitch) but she refused. Our puppy grew up well and we have socialized her with other people and dogs. When she was 4 month old we noticed some changes after we signed her up for puppy class. She got bullied all the time by other puppies and the trainer pulled her into the class over and over again. This is when the whole problem started. Over the years we consulted several trainers but without success. In fact one of them abused her! So she grew up as a loyal dog but we had to keep her away from other dogs and people. At last we consulted a behaviorist who diagnosed her with fear aggression. She bit and was quarantine twice. It was our decision to euthanize her. It was the most difficult thing we have ever done. we used to have dogs all the time and they were all friendly and cuddly, but unfortunately not our last one. I feel for all who have to make this kind of decision. Time will heal but she remains in our heart.
scott says
I had to make the tough decision to put my dog down this past weekend. He was a healthy two year old labrador (Captain Hook), my 5 year old sons dog, and the son of my beloved 13 year old lab. In June my vet recommended having him neutered because one of his testicles was significantly smaller than the other. After this, the dog never seemed the same. As the summer progressed I started to notice his aggression level toward strangers increasing. Our yard is fenced and we tried very hard to keep our son (5) and daughter (3) from leaving the gate open.
One day, about a month ago, our kids opened the garage door and went out to greet their grandmother. A stranger was walking down the sidewalk across the street and our dog ran over and bit him on the arm breaking the skin. We decided to take more measures to ensure the safety of others because we did not want to put our dog down or give an aggressive dog away. We cross fenced our yard so the dog would not have access to the gate leaving the yard or the garage. We also got a shocker collar and anytime we went out of the yard, even on a leash, put it on him.
This weekend my wife and kids were out for a bit and was just me and the dogs, who are all house dogs and members of the family (13 year old yellow lab made-the dad, 5 year old female black lab, and a 2 year old male-the son). I let the dog out in the yard when I was getting a cup of coffee. Our neighbor’s grandkid, my son’s friend, climbed the fence between our houses to come visit and our dog bit him on the arm. He had a long sleeve and jacket on, so it did not break the skin, but left purple teeth marks and bruises on his arm. The kid he bit had been in our yard and played with the dog an uncountable number of times. It was a very tough decision, but with young kids and many of their friends coming and going I made the decision to euthanize the dog. My wife and I had discussed prior that we would try everything in our power to keep the dog, but if there was another incident or if we feared for our kids or other kids safety we would euthanize.
Captain Hook greeted us each morning when the alarm went off and was very loving to our family. This was the hardest, most guilt-ridden decision I ever made in my life.
Lee says
We’re thinking about this at the moment. We have a 4 year old lab that we got at 6 months from a rescue centre.
Everything was ok for a few months until she went for me while we had friends round. All I did was walk past her. It’s happened a lot since and there are no signs to when it’s going to happen so can’t pinpoint a trigger.
I keep making excuses for it and keep her away from everyone one just in case something worse happens.
She’s never off the lead when we’re out because I worry what will happen if someone went running over to her.
We’ve spent thousands on various behaviourists over the years and it’s now started to cause arguments at home.
It is a really tough decision and can’t help feel that I’ve failed her.
Brett says
My wife and I had to make this terrible decision on Saturday. (sorry for the long post, but I hope it helps someone who is in the middle of deciding whether or not to put down their dog).
McKinley was a very social dog, his favorite thing to do was to meet other dogs and people. In fact, he was so good at this that even our close family never really saw him at his worst during a bad episode of aggression. In fact, were he still alive now, I bet that any one of you could meet him and you’d never know that he had an aggression issue. We would take him to dog parts 2-3 times a week and literally everyone couldn’t believe how well behaved he was, even in play. Friend would come over to the house and shower him with attention and play in the yard, no issues. However, over the course of the 3.5 years with us, here are some things he did:
-Kept my wife and I from going into our bedroom on one occasion. We had to shut the door and sleep in our office. We woke up the next morning (which normally he would be fine by then), and he was snarling and growling at us through our bedroom door.
-Kept us from going down our stairs that morning. Refused to back up, was snarling and lunging. We had to use a couple of baby gates in front of us to try to encourage him away from the area. Instead, he proceeded to literally destroy the wooden gate I had in front of me by biting it. He tore it to shreds and wouldn’t back up. My wife couldn’t get out the front door and had to call in to work.
-Bit me 3 times, my sister’s shoe while it was on her foot, my mother-in-law, sister-in-law, a friend dog sitter, and our other dog Cali multiple times. Most of these did not break skin and most of them took place before he was a year old. After his one year mark, he only bit Cali. Most of these bites were due to a resource guarding issue, but the “resource” was often times not food and often times unpredictable.
-The first time we went to a dog park with Cali (we adopted her when he was about 2.5 years or so old), he freaked out at the water bowl and wouldn’t let anyone or anything near it for about 15 minutes. He’d never had an issue at a dog park in the past, not even close to an issue.
-Would freak out in the back of the car randomly to the point that we got a Kennel Air divider. We were able to train this mostly away, but would still have some issues on longer trips, even with frequent stops. Sometimes even on short trips.
-Lunged at my legs over literally nothing apparent. We think it was because I answered the door to let my wife in from work and he was wanting all the attention from her, but that was the only time this ever happened and it was completely random.
-Over the last year, bit our other dog Cali on 8 different occasions. None required vet visits, thank God.
-Sometimes, he’d go lay down in our master bedroom bathroom when we were going to bed, and he’d randomly get triggered and start growling. Other times, he didn’t care and you could literally step right over him or tell him to move and he was happy as a clam.
-He was muzzle trained and NEVER had any issues with it. Towards the end, my wife went to put it on him while he was happily sitting and wagging his tail. Soon as the basket was on his nose and she went to fast the claps on the back, he aggressively tried to bite her… HARD. Luckily, he his nose was in the basket. Ironically, he didn’t have any issue a few days later when we put it on.
I can go on and on and on. We had so many GREAT times with him where there were zero issues, but we also had tons of times where there were issues or we had to greatly mitigate to avoid the issues. It got to the point to where we didn’t know what the next trigger would be. Sometimes he’d be triggered in the house and very aggressive, and 15 minutes later he would be completely normal.
We did many things to address these issues, but here are a few:
-A couple different dog training classes starting when he was young.
-Took him again when he was about a year old.
-Massive socialization. Took him everywhere.
-Regular diet and meal times.
-Tons of positive reinforcement with treats and lots of exercise/activities.
-Mental training (man he was smart… he picked up on things faster than your kid would).
-Took him to the #1 certified animal behaviorist in WA State. She was nervous with him after seeing him go after our other dog, Cali. She pretty much just gave us a book about resource guarding and said to do it. In other words, we think she was just not willing to tell us that he had an innate issue, most likely genetic mixed with environmental (during his first 7 weeks).
-Gave him a larger, indoor 4×8 kennel to give him more room and as safe place to retreat to were he to get into a bad mood.
-Successfully and positively muzzle trained him.
The problem was that he was SO DAMN GOOD most of the time. But when he would get triggered, there was no middle ground, no gray area. It was 0-100mph. He was either happy, or if pissed off, he was literally Cujo.
The reason that we ended up deciding to euthanize him was due to his most recent issue a week ago where he kept us from getting into our bedroom and kept us from coming down the stairs. That, mixed with him trying to bite my wife’s hand when she went to muzzle him, lead to broken trust. My wife didn’t feel safe anymore. We thought about all of the different ways that we could try to mitigate these issues, but he was getting to the point to where he would turn his mood to pissed off over minor things, often without warning. God forbid we ever had to take him to the vet, who would demand a muzzle. Forget brushings lasting beyond a few minutes, or clipping more than a couple of nails in one sitting. He most recently bit our dog Cali because they were going up the stairs at the same time (something that he never did in the past).
There will forever be a part of me and my wife that will regret doing it. This is because we KNOW how great he could be. His personality, his affection, his intelligence. We are constantly thinking about WHAT ELSE COULD WE HAVE DONE?! Should we have just waited it out and kept him in a larger kennel and only let him out when he is a good mood to play and go potty? What kind of life would that have been? Could things have gotten better?
At the end of it all, we realized that his mood swings were too unpredictable and what would happen if my wife was home alone with him and he had a very aggressive one? She wouldn’t be able to fight off a 130 pound Alaskan Malamute. Hell, I’d have a hard time doing it.
The good times, the memories, the fact that we came home after he was put down and his kennel was empty with his water bowl on the ground… we probably won’t ever be 100% over it. We will always have some regret. What could we have done differently? Was it our fault? Was he damaged goods?
We loved Kinley with everything we had and only wanted to spoil him more. We truly believe, as did the vet, that he had something genetically or mentally wrong with him that would cause him to have random triggers and mood swings. My advice to you is to do absolutely everything that you can to re-train your dog. Get professional help, spend the money, and abide by their recommended program. See a vet! And most importantly, talk it over and over and over and over until you can’t talk about it anymore. My wife and I would be sure, then we’d try to talk ourselves out of it. We realized we had a small version of Stockholm’s… or at least that is what it felt like. You want so badly to hold onto the good, but how much risk are you willing to take? What happens if that next outburst of aggression results in a major injury or your wife/child injured? Is it worth that?
Truth is, most owners wouldn’t have done have of what we did to try and fix McKinley’s issues. We gave him a great life, spoiled him, and have great memories. While we’ll always regret making the decision to some degree, we know that it was the right one. Life isn’t fair. All you can do is do your best with the situation, try everything to fix it, but if there is a REAL risk to your family and others, then you need to really think about if it is worth it. We miss McKinley dearly and all I want, even now, is just to be able to hug him again or have him nudge his head under my arm in the morning in bed trying to wake me up.
Sometimes, not matter how much you try, there is no reward.
Rest in peace, Kin Kin. We’ll miss you forever.
Tessah says
I am terrified of that. I have a nearly three year old German Shepherd, who is a big baby. Yet, severly overprotective of me. While my dog has never really shown aggresive tendencies other than a big bad bark, he will scare me. He takes off after people who run, and loved to get away to chase those on motorcycles, bikes, dirt bikes, and any type of ATV. For the past couple hours I’ve been searching for behavoral trainers to help with his tendencies. Barking, taking off, a bit of dog aggression. Earlier today, kids were riding through my property in a four wheeler, which although is trespassing I was terrified for them, because my dog ran up to them and managed to bite ones pant leg. Attempting to tug them to a stop. I had to dive between him and a four wheeler after he bit a child’s shoe that kicked him in the snout.
He has never been violent with others other than jumping and mild parking. Chasing other animals from our yard, but always returning. I am scared that if they did things again, he might take a bigger bite and maybe take a chunk out of someone.
Since he’s never been aggressive and really only becomes violent it seems while chasing someone or while provoked, Im hoping to get him into private lessons ASAP and ensure that he will not hu